For the Sake of Love
Kiaran looked around the desolate wasteland. As she looked each memory popped in her head like an exploding balloon.
She looked at the temple.
Anakin ran around. "Look at what I can do Master Kenobi." He lifted a rock with the force. "Did you see?"
BAM, she closed the door on that memory. She looked at the old airport.
"I'll love you forever," Jacen said.
"I've had a lot of men tell me that," she told him. "I don't trust it any more." And it was a good thing she didn't, because he left, like all the other men in her life.
BAM, she closed the door on that memory as well. She looked at the senate building.
"Work for me and you'll never have to worry about pain again," Palpatine said. She hadn't believed him either. Pain never left her. She always had pain, deep inside. Some of it she never let out, such as her memories of Luke-
Luke held Kiaran close to him and leaned down to kiss her. "No," she told him and pushed him away. "I can't love you. You'll leave me like all the others."
She tried to stop that memory before it got to the painful part, but it kept coming.
"I have to have you," he told her.
"If you don't get away from me then I'll kill you," she replied to his plea.
Finally, she shut the door on that memory. She reached up to brush her hair out of her eyes. She felt a liquid there. Tears? She thought. I haven't cried since, since Anakin left me. The memory came to her, vivid and clear, as though it had just happened.
"You betrayed us Kiaran," Anakin yelled at her.
"What about me? What about how you betrayed me, betrayed all I ever asked of you, betrayed our love. All for that stupid Jedi academy." That was what she yelled at him. No, it wasn't exactly that. The memory seemed to fade as another one replaced it.
"What is love," Nom Anor, the Yuzhan Vong, had asked her.
Ah, the Yuzhan Vong. They were the ones who killed all the humans and then killed themselves off. They were so foolish. "What is love?" That question pushed its way back into her mind.
"I'm not sure," she had told him. "I've…never really had true love."
"But what is it?"
"I…I don't know. I've…never…known…"
The memory faded as another replaced that one.
"Jacen," Kiaran called. "What is love?"
"It is a word that is to be described by each person," he had answered.
"What is it to you then?"
"The most wonderful thing in the world."
She shut the door on that memory. What is love? That question stayed in her mind. She remembered the dictionary defining it as "to be passionately fond of someone or something," but what was it? That didn't seem to be the right definition for her. What is love? The words repeated themselves in her head. What is love?
Kiaran remembered those that she thought she loved. They had all left her, and she remembered whom they left her for.
Anakin had left her for Padme and the Jedi. Han had left her for Leia. Luke had left her for his students. Palpatine had left her for power. Dooku had left her for revenge. Kyp had left her for Jaina. Jacen had left her for Daini Qui. Nom Anor had left her for his honor. They had all left her, and now she was alone, and would always be alone, for now there was no one in the galaxy.
What is love? Again the question came to her. Was it what her father had for the Jedi when he was killed? No, that was hate, and she had hated them too for that.
Kiaran looked around. She couldn't place her emotions anymore. Tears, they meant…What? She couldn't remember. Love, love is… She remembered an assignment she had been given once. She had a paper with sentences on it and she had to fill in the blanks. She felt as though she had to do that now. What is love? Love is…Fill in the blank. It seemed impossible. What is love? I don't know, she thought. Is tears love? No, tears are…are, sorrow. She remembered. Love…What is love?
What is love? What is love? The words repeated themselves in her head. Love, loved, loving, what is love? What is love? She had never been able to say. She looked up to the sky. It was night. Kiaran smiled. Smiling is…happiness, or anger? No, it was happiness, she remembered. There was one really bright star in the sky. Then, it hit her. Love is a star that you always can reach for, but it never seems to get any closer, and you can never have it. That was love. Tears fell down her cheeks. Sorrow.
Why was she sorrowful? She wanted love. That was why. Love…An unreachable star. Love…An unreachable star. Why did the Sith Lords have to make her immortal. Why was she never able to love? Love…An unreachable star. Love…"A treasure to be cherished." Kiaran turned around. A man was behind her.
"Who are you?" she asked him.
"A man who's looking for a wonderful treasure."
"Love." He nodded.
"My name is Jacen Duron, grandson of Jaina Solo and Kyp Duron. I hid from the Yuzhan Vong and thought myself to be the only human left. I never expected to find you while going for a walk."
Love, an unreachable star. Was the star getting closer for her? Or was this hopeless as well. Love, an unreachable star. Love, an unreachable star. Love, an unreachable star, or maybe it's not so unreachable. Should I try to love this man, no, he is a boy. Love, an unreachable star. Should I? Love, an unreachable star. Love, an unreachable star. The mantra kept repeating itself. Love, an unreachable star. Love, an unreachable star. What should I do?
"What is love?" she asked him.
"A passion that one should do anything for, a joy that one should want with all of his or her heart, a peace that brings one to complete happiness, a hope that brightens one's heart immensely, but mostly, a treasure one should cherish a though it were a priceless jewel. What is it to you?"
"Love is a star that you always can reach for, but it never seems to get any closer, and you can never have it."
"Why?"
"Because I can never find a man that will love me for who and what I am, an immortal, biological robot built by Sith Lords."
"I think you're beautiful."
"There's more to love than beauty."
"And smart."
Kiaran looked up at him. "Love, an unreachable star."
"Not for you and me." She leaned up to kiss him. Kissing is passion, happiness, joy, peace, delight, blissfulness, serenity, harmony, but mostly, love. What would she do now?
"I'd do anything for the sake of love," Jacen said. That was it, she'd do anything. Anything for the sake of a love that she could grasp and hold. She kissed Jacen again. Anything for love. Love, an unreachable star, no. It's not anymore. Not for me at least.
Love is passion, happiness, joy, peace, delight, blissfulness, serenity, harmony…no longer an unreachable star.