Red Light by Frogie48

Driving home all I could think of was getting into the tub and soaking for at least a week. This day had been crap from the time I opened my eyes this morning, literally. I opened my eyes to find that the toilet had been steadily overflowing probably since James had left for work thirty minutes before. Then as I was cleaning up the water and fixing the toilet, I stubbed my toe on the vanity. I was over an hour late for work and had forgotten to pack a lunch. I couldn't go get anything since I was late so I just ate vending machine fare. I had the slowest computer in the office today so I got next to nothing done. By quitting time I was done. Frustrated to the max! I walked out to my car to find that someone had backed into the driver's side taillight, shattering it. Of course there was no note. I felt completely defeated. I drove home on autopilot and near tears. I couldn't wait to see my husband and let him comfort me. Hell at this point I was ready for some serious pampering. When I pulled in the driveway I noticed his car wasn't there so I decided I would take a long hot bubble bath and order some take-out. He usually beat me home but even when he didn't he wasn't home long after I was.

I closed my purse strap in the car door and had to yank it open to free myself. I kicked the door just to emphasize my irritation. I stomped up the steps to the front door and grabbed the mail as I unlocked the door. I dropped everything on the hall table and went straight to the bathroom to start my bath. I was going to get out of this bad mood one way or another. I ordered some Chinese for James and I, which they said should be there in an hour. So I stripped out of my work clothes (which by the way didn't match and I just now noticed) and sunk all the way to my ears in the hot, soapy water; the heat instantly calming my nerves. I soaked for a while and then cleaned up and shaved my legs. Feeling better I finished in the shower washing my hair. When I got out I felt much lighter than I had before. I found something sexy to wear and threw on my robe just in time to answer the door for the delivery man. I paid him and took the food to the kitchen. I wanted to wait on James so I put it in the warming drawer of my oven. I decided to pick up the house a little and texted James to see when he would be home. He answered quickly saying he'd be there in 20 minutes. So after picking up the living room and loading the few dirty dishes into the dishwasher I finally looked at the mail. Two credit card invitations, the power bill, the cable bill, two baby shower invitations and something from the City of Memphis; I opened the baby shower invitations first. Rose was due in six weeks and Angela was due in eight weeks and their showers were only a day apart. Then I opened the thing from the city of Memphis, it was from the traffic violations department. Apparently James had run a red light and got a ticket. "Well, it's not the first time," I said out loud, "won't be the last, I'm sure." As I read the form to see when the payment was due I noticed the picture. There were two people in the car. James was driving but there was a red headed woman in the passenger seat. Well she was kind of in the passenger seat. She was leaning over with her head on his shoulder. I instantly felt sick. I looked for the time stamp; it was from three weeks prior to today. It happened at three o'clock in the afternoon on a Thursday. He should have been at work. I set the mail on the table and went to the kitchen.

I opened the fridge and pulled out the bottle of white wine. Pouring myself a tall glass I sat down at the table and waited. Sure enough twenty minutes from the time I texted James, he walked in the front door. He called out to me and I nearly threw up. He was wearing a gray suit with a black dress shirt. He looked so good. He looked relaxed and happy. I studied his face to see if I could tell if he was cheating on me. I didn't see anything there but happiness. So then my stupid anxiety kicked into high gear. Is he happy because of her? Is he happy because he thinks he is getting away with something? Is he happy with me? No of course he isn't, if he is cheating. I must have been staring at him with an odd look on my face because he tilted his head and smiled at me. "What'cha thinking about?" he asked. I decided to just ask the first question. "Are you happy?"

"Yes, I am. Why wouldn't I be?" He said with a smile. "I have a beautiful wife, a great job, a lovely home, money in the bank and everything I could ever need."

"Yeah, I guess. Are you happy with me?" I ask.

"Absolutely. I am completely in love with you."

I decide to just get dinner out and make plates. I didn't want to know that he was lying to me. I could feel my heart breaking. I knew that tonight was the last night of my perfect marriage and the life I thought I had. I wanted to keep it for a just a minute longer.

So I kissed his lips and fixed our plates. I poured him a glass of wine and sat down next to him in my sexy outfit. We ate our cashew chicken and drank our wine. We kissed and laughed and everything was perfect. I straddled his hips in the kitchen and just as I was about to remove him from his clothes I remembered he was over an hour late and I didn't know if he was carrying around the stank from another woman. I ordered him to shower. He complied easily.

I led him to the bedroom where I stripped his clothes from him myself. I had to see him. I had to see if there was any trace of my fears. He seemed clean to me but I started the shower for him anyway. I watched him thru the glass door. I kept my emotions out and waited until he was done. He opened the door and stepped out onto the soft white bathmat that I had taken out of the linen closet this morning. He gave me a look of pure love and adoration as he wrapped his strong arms around my waist. I wasted no time wrapping my legs around him and kissing him. He carried me to the bedroom and climbed into our huge king sized bed. I kept myself attached to him the whole time. I didn't want to let him go. He kissed me like he always did; as if I were the only person in the world. He kissed every inch of my skin. He took his time. He loved me. When he pressed himself inside of my wet and waiting sex I cried. I couldn't hold it in any longer. I took his weight on me as a blanket of security. I needed him. I loved him. He was breaking me and he didn't even know it.

I felt the need to control him so I pushed him to roll over. Once on top I rocked over him bringing myself to orgasm. I was sitting up completely and he was watching my body as if in awe of me. I felt powerful. I felt a hundred feet tall. I held his gaze as I began to come again. I saw tears in his eyes as well. He sat up to me and wrapped his arms around me as we both cried. He rolled us to my back again and we stayed connected until the tears stopped and we finished with a pounding roar. I held his panting body to me until he slipped out of me.

We separated and lay beside one another. We lay quietly for a while before I break the silence. "Who is she?" I ask.

"Victoria, from work," he says easily.

"Do you love her?" I ask.

"I don't think so," he replies.

"How long?" I ask simply.

"Two months."

"Is that why you have been getting home late?"

"Yes, sometimes."

"Sometimes?" I question.

"Well sometimes I had to work to get caught up."

"From being with her during the day?"

"Well, yes."

"Why?"

"I honestly don't know," he says, sounding sincere.

"Did you start it?"

"No."

"So she came on to you? Did you tell her you were happily married?"

"Yes and yes."

"So how did you end up sleeping with her?"

"Do you really want to know this stuff?" he asks sounding defeated. I can't look at him so I am judging by his voice.

"No, but I need to understand."

He sits up and I see his face for the first time since the questions started. He is crying. He looks lost. He doesn't look like someone who is upset he got caught he looks truly remorseful. It makes me angry.

I sit up and look at him hard. "I need to understand why you would throw away six years of marriage. I need to understand why you weren't satisfied with me."

"I can't answer that. I love you. I have loved you from the moment I saw you. I will always love you," he says as if that is enough.

"Well you better figure out why and you can do that from your mother's house," I say angrily. "You have destroyed this marriage. I don't know if I can ever forgive you. I found out from a red light ticket, James; a fucking picture in the mail. You say you don't know if you love her and that you love me. How can you do this to someone you love?"

I break down again. He reaches for me. To comfort me like he has so many times over the years; only now it feels wrong. I don't want him to touch me. I want to scratch his eyes out.

"Please don't touch me," I ask shakily.

"I'm so sorry. I know that won't change anything. I know that you will hate me now. I deserve that."

"Tell me how you let her get you into bed," the masochist in me needs to hear it out loud.

"I accepted her offer of lunch one afternoon. Hoping that would stop the advances. We had a nice lunch. I talked about you even. Told her how happy we were. She told me about her past and how hard her life had been. I felt sorry for her. She hadn't ever felt love. She didn't know what it felt like to love someone like I loved you." He stopped for air and I interrupted.

"So you fucked her to show her love?" I spit at him like acid.

"No, of course not. We went to lunch a few more times and got to know each other. Then I found myself thinking about her when she wasn't around. I noticed I looked forward to seeing her. We started kissing at the end of our lunch dates and then one afternoon, we let things get out of hand. It started with kissing and before I knew it she was jerking me off in the car," he stops again and I feel the most overwhelming sense of hatred I have ever felt. I control my tongue though because he starts again.

"We made plans to get a hotel for an afternoon. I took a vacation day and met her there. We spent the whole afternoon makin, um, in bed. I felt so guilty when I left that I called her and told her we were through. She cried and I caved in the next day. We started meeting on Thursdays when we could."

"Did you use a condom?"

"Always, and I never made love to you after being with her."

"Oh well that was thoughtful of you," I say with a laugh, sounding like a Disney villain.

So let me get this straight; you don't know if you love her but you made dates to fuck her weekly. You let her tears talk you into continuing an affair that you felt guilty for having. You purposely protected yourself and me from any STD's she might have and didn't share yourself with two women on the same day."

He just shakes his head. "I guess that is one way of looking at it."

"Well I could say that you met a woman at work, started a friendship that turned to a loving relationship, tried to end it when you felt bad for your wife but couldn't because this woman means more to you than your wife. I could say that you love this woman even if you won't admit it to yourself. But saying that means that I am losing you forever so…." I stop to think for a second.

"I guess I am losing you forever though."

"No, baby, please just give me a chance to fix this," he begs.

"I don't think you can. Even if we separate now, go through counseling and try to make it work; I will always wonder if you are still seeing her, or if you have found someone new. I can't live like that. I won't live like that."

"I will break it off with her, right now if you want," he offers. I see a moment that the maniacal side of me can't pass up.

"Would you? Right now?" I ask.

"Absolutely. Let me get my phone," he says jumping up and stepping to the bathroom to get his phone from his pants. It's not there so he runs to the kitchen to get it. He is still naked. I almost giggle but the moment is too serious for that. When he returns he climbs into bed and sits facing me. He dials his phone and puts it to his ear. I tell him to put it on speaker, to which he reluctantly agrees.

"Hey, babe. What's up?" she says in a baby like voice.

"Vickie, I have to break this off," he says quickly.

"What? Why? I promise she isn't going to find out," she whines.

"She did. I got a red light ticket and you are in the car with me," he says.

"So, just tell her that it is us going to lunch. There isn't anything wrong with that."

"I wouldn't believe that, seeing as how your head is on my husband's shoulder in the picture," I say alerting her to my presence.

"James, take me off speaker right now!" she growls.

"No Vickie. We are through. I love my wife and I am going to fix this with her," he says trying to sound firm but failing.

"James, please talk to me. You don't love her anymore, you told me so," she whines.

I feel like I have been slapped because his face tells me that wasn't a lie. Any hope I had for possibly working through this is gone in a flash. I get up and get out of bed. I start getting dressed and he just sits there. He knows it is over. She is still begging him to talk to her in the background but he isn't listening. He is watching me. He is watching me pack my bag while her nagging voice is crying on his phone. He hangs his head and looks at his phone. Finally it is quiet. He hung up on her. He looks to me with tears in his eyes and says, " I am sorry, I really do love you."

I hold my hand up to silence him. "I love you too but I hate you more right now. I am going to my mom's or Alice's for a few days. I will let you know what I am going to do. Please don't call or text me. Don't check on me. Don't bother me," I beg. "I need time." I take my bags and I walk past him. I go to the kitchen to get a bottle of water and I leave, taking the mail with me, except the bills. I leave those for him.