A/N: So I watched DH part 2 yesterday and frankly, the only thing I got out of the epilogue scene was ALBUS SEVERUS POTTER HAS A PET FERRET! And of course, I wasn't completely positive if what I saw was correct, so I asked my friend, who I happened to be watching the movie with and they of course answered, yes, that is a ferret. Somehow this story came from that. The name Bovril comes from the Leviathan series by Scott Westerfeld.
A Pet Ferret
"Al..." Scorpius sat on his bed, watching Albus as he fed his pet ferret.
"Yeah?"
"Why exactly do you have a pet ferret?"
"Because, James wouldn't let me buy an owl since he has one. Lily didn't want me to buy a cat because she wanted one, although I never even wanted a cat in the first place. I wasn't sure what to get by then, I didn't want a toad, but I saw this little guy at the store." Albus paused for a moment to tickle the ferret. "Hogwarts only allows owls, cats, or toads though."
"How'd you get a ferret in here then?"
"I owled Professor McGonagall and asked if I could bring a ferret. I heard from Professor Dumbledore's portrait later when I met him that she couldn't stop laughing. She told me I could bring a ferret though. So I asked my dad if I could have one. He burst out laughing too."
"Why?"
"Oh... you never heard the story? When my Dad told me about it, I couldn't stop laughing either, it was hilarious. Even worse when I told my Dad that we were best friends."
"What story?" Scorpius narrowed his eyes. Albus grinned and shook his head.
"Ask your Dad for a ferret story." Albus then picked up his ferret and headed for the door. "Come on, Bovril, let's go find Rose."
Deciding that he didn't want to be left out on this seemingly hilarious story, Scorpius decided to follow Albus' advice and owl his father.
Dear Father,
I heard about a ferret story from Albus. I was wondering if you could tell me this story.
Scorpius
He wrote the letter quickly and sent it with his owl before heading out the door.
~xxx~
"DRACO! SCORPIUS SENT YOU A LETTER!" Astoria called from the kitchen. Draco came down the stairs and took the parchment from his wife, his face paling by the second as he read the extremely short letter over and over again. He quickly picked up a spare piece of parchment and a quill.
Dear Scorpius,
You do not need to have knowledge of this story.
Father
He sent it off with a slight glare at the owl and swept from the room, refusing to meet Astoria's amusing smile.
~xxx~
"Hey, Al." Albus nodded absentmindedly as he finished his Transfiguration essay with flourish.
"Tell me the story of the ferret."
"I told you to ask your Dad."
"He wouldn't tell me."
"Oh. Your Dad got turned into a ferret."
"WHAT?"
"Yeah, he was pissing off this professor and he got turned into a ferret. It's a pretty short story."
"Oh..."
"Yup."
"I've got to owl my father." Scorpius got up from his chair and left the room, leaving Albus alone to start on his Potions essay.
Dear Father,
Albus told me the story since you wouldn't. I hope you know, he has a pet ferret. Everyone finds it quite hilarious, I do too.
Scorpius
~xxx~
Draco Malfoy glared at the parchment in front of him. How dare that Potter clone tell his son the story! How dare Potter allow his son to have a ferret?
"Scorpius is going to be laughing every time he sees his own Father, Astoria."
"He won't. You taught him well enough to be emotionless." She said comfortingly, though her smile gave away the fact that she was highly amused.
"I take offense to that."
"I'm sure you do." She gave him a pat on the head and left the room.