Courier's Diary

by Icarus Vice

Based on the story by Three Rejects, Wanderer's Diary. A man is shot in the face and now he wants vengeance. Sort of. Rated T for language and a lot of dying.

A/N: I must give credit where credit is due, and that is that the idea for the Courier's Diary came from another story by Three Rejects called Wanderer's Diary, a Fallout 3 fanfic with much the same premise as this one. You know, hero of a game writes a diary of his travels, real fun , sorry if these chapters are super long, but I want to fit as much detail into the diary as possible.

WEEK ONE
Day 1: October 19th, 2281
Damn Geckos

I was shot in the head.

I'm not kidding; I was shot right between the eyes. I can't believe it, but it's true. Some random guy shot me. Didn't get a real good look at him, but I could tell he was a real asshole. Want to know how I know? HE SHOT ME IN THE HEAD!

I was on a routine courier job. I was tasked with getting a platinum chip up to Freeside. Normally, I do my business in California, but this was a special deal. 250 caps was something I really needed. Shoveling brahmin crap doesn't go for much, and courier jobs are scarce, so 250 caps was pretty important.

And now, for my trouble, I get shot in the head. Well, crap.

When I woke up, I was greeted by this old guy. Introduced himself as Doc Mitchell. Said he patched me up and went around in my brain taking all the bits of lead out. After a few little tests (a vigor test, a psychological test, and my medical history) he gave me some of my stuff. A gun, some caps, some ammo, and a note. The note was about that damn platinum chip. He also let me take some stuff from his house, including stimpaks, a doctor's bag, some Med-X, and a 9mm SMG, along with a laser pistol. I took a knife which I have named Sabertooth, since it looks like a giant tooth. I also convinced him that my pain was flaring so he gave me 5 stimpaks. He also gave me his old Pipboy 3000, a good organizational/diagnosis/location/memorization tool. Afterward I was done stealing/borrowing his stuff, he told me to go find Sunny Smiles at the saloon, as she'll teach me survival skills I'll need in the Mojave.

Upon exiting Doc Mitchell's place, I immediately ran into this Securitron known as Victor. I had never seen a robot like him before, so I asked. He said he was (wait for it) a Securitron. He told me that he was the one who dug me out of the grave. Unfortunately, he couldn't tell who they were, so that's no help.

Anywho, I continued to the saloon where I was confronted by Sunny Smiles, the town survivalist. She offered to teach me how to shoot, gun included, and I accepted. My pistol was in crappy condition, so a new gun would be a god send.

We headed out back and she gave me a hunting rifle along with 60 rounds of 5.56 ammo. In return, I had to fend off an angry horde of... SARSAPARILLA BOTTLES! (Dun dun dunnnnnn!) After shooting about three of them, Sunny asked me to help clear a well of geckos. I had never fought a gecko before, so I figured they would be easy. I mean COME ON, it's a GECKO. I was wrong on my assumption that they were easy.

After clearing the first well easily enough, she offered to kill some more geckos. I agreed. The second well went down easy, but the third is where shit drew dangerously close to the fan. A woman was being attacked by about three geckos and unfortunately, these geckos were stronger than normal geckos, and they killed the lady. I took all her stuff, and Sunny paid me in caps. She offered to teach me how to make things on the trail, but I declined. I don't need your stinking healing powder, lady! Of course, she decided to FORCE ME to me meet the town bartender, Trudy. I needed a beer, and fast, but I also wanted to check out this one guy who seemed very lost.

I learned his name was Barton Thorn and that his girl-friend was trapped up on the ridge past the broken radio tower. I figured I'd be the Good Samaritan and help him out in his time of need. Then the Geckos came.

Geckos, geckos, they came from all corners of my vision. I think I must've killed at least 12 within about two minutes. I also used about 9 stimpaks on me. I was beaten within an inch of my life. But, I survived. One gecko was stupid enough to get stuck on a bear trap. I tried using my rifle on these guys, but soon switched to my laser pistol. When that failed, I tried to use my knife, which while it was the most effective, gave me the world's WORST scratch since my dog tried to maul my (now-ex) girlfriend.

Turn's out there was no girl. Upon climbing up to the top of the ridge, I was greeted by a small stash of weaponry and a dead guy whose glasses said "Johnny." I looted him and the stash. I got myself some since duds and a sweet 10mm pistol. Of course, Barton followed me and told me he could finally get to the stash, as soon as he dealt with me. I promptly shot his head off. Just fell right off his neck. I looted him too. Got some 10mm ammo to make up for the ammo I lost while fighting him. I suppose he was the first person I killed directly. I kinda feel bad now. What if he had a family? Oh, what am I saying? HE TRIED TO KILL ME!

Why does the wasteland want me dead?

On my way back to Goodsprings I came upon a small shack that said "Jean Sky Diving." Why in the world people would watch jeans fall from the sky baffles me, but never the less I entered. I found a nice stash of weapons and ammo, along with a strange bottle cap. It's a Sunset Sarsaparilla cap, but it has a star on the bottom. I think I'll keep it with me and not spend it.

When I got back to Goodsprings, I stopped by the saloon to meet Trudy. She was having an argument with some guy from the NCR Correctional Facility. Upon talking to Trudy, I found out that he was Joe Cobb and he was an escaped convict. Or should I say, escaped-then-took-over-the-prison convict. Says he a member of the Powder Gangers. Turns out that giving criminals a bunch of dynamite and blasting powder ISN'T the best idea. Anyways, Goodsprings is helping this guy named Ringo and if they don't hand him over, the Powder Gangers will burn this town to the ground.

After fixing her radio for some caps, I decided to get some shuteye. I'm staying in this derelict trailer nobody owns, so yay me! I've also decided to write down this journal on my Pipboy, so if I die, people might know the circumstances.

Here's to me not dying.

Day 2: October 20th, 2281
School's Out

I had a hard time sleeping last night. At about 1:00 am, a Bighorner started to ram it's ugly mug into the side of the trailer. At about 5:00 am, this guy named Malcolm Holmes woke me up.

Remember that star cap I picked up? Well, Mr. Holmes seems to be a bit of an expert on them. Told me that if I collect 50 star caps, I'll have the key to a fabulous treasure from before the war. He also said that new bottles just magically appear in the machines now and then, and also that some guys will shoot a guy on the suspicion that they have some star caps.

Then, suddenly, Malcolm vanished into thin air. Freaky...

At about 8:00 am, I woke up and looted some mailboxes. People don't think it's wrong that I steal their magazines and various other things. I got some magazines, a knife and some bits and bobs like sensor modules and wonderglue. I ran into Sunny Smiles, who told me that if I want some epic bits and pieces, that I should head to the school house to try and crack open this safe. She gave me some bobby pins and a magazine on locksmiths. I decided to head to the school house and get me some loot.

When I got inside I was attacked by mantises. Tiny mantises, but they got a bite to them. Of course, each one only required one bullet to kill them, except for one little bastard who kept dodging my shots even though my Pipboy's targeting computer, V.A.T.S, said I had a 95% percent chance of hitting him. I used 5 bullets on him, and only hit him once. To be honest, I don't like mantises.

Still though, the safe got some really stuff in it. A couple of chems, some magazines, and a stealth boy. Supposedly, these make you invisible for a few minutes. Awesome. I also got some bobby pins out of it along. I didn't find any skeletons, so I think they were either cleared out when Goodsprings was settled, or school was out the day of the War. I really hope it was the latter. Or maybe the mantises ate the skeletons. I don't know.

I soon decided to help the town fend off the Powder Gangers, since I really had nothing better to do. I met up with Ringo, who told me to talk to Sunny Smiles, who told me to talk to Trudy, who told me to talk to Chet the merchant, who told me to run off. Well, I didn't take too kindly to that, so I decided to use my undeniable charm(and something I read in a magazine) to convince him that criminals are bad for business. He decided to arm our militia with leather armor and extra ammo.

I also tried to talk to both Doc Mitchell and the local "ye ole coot," Easy Pete. Doc Mitchell told me that while he can't fight due to his "bum leg" and that his supplies are scarce, but he still gave me some stimpaks. Easy Pete has decided that I can't light a stick of dynamite and throw it, so he's given me the cold shoulder. Figures. Speaking of Doc Mitchell, while I was over there, I made some stimpaks with his chemistry set. And he didn't even flinch that I used all his chemicals.

I headed up to Ringo's place, and sure enough, while we were talking Sunny came barging in and said a group of Powder Gangers had invaded the town. Trudy's militia had come in and was set up in front of the saloon and store, and we were to go meet her there. Joe Cobb, along with 5 other ridiculously dressed people, had become hell bent on getting this town destroyed. Within about a minute, the shooting had commenced. I killed about 2 powder gangers, and the militia (which had about a dozen people in it) killed the rest. Poor gangsters.

I've complied a list of all the junk I got:
- Some magazines including Lad's Life and Meeting People
- Some guns and knives
- Some various bits and bobs belonging to various machines
- Some ammo
- A nice hat
- Some NCRCF armor. If I wear this, I'll get shot on sight by the NCR.
- A bunch of chems
- Two Stealth Boys. I'm happy about these.

I'm gonna repair my armor and weapons, and I'll sell some things I don't want, like these annoying pieces of junk. Then I'll get some sleep and head for Primm tomorrow. Hopefully, the Mojave Express courier office can tell me more about the platinum chip.

Day 2: Part Deux
I'm About To Die

I just read the note, and it reads that if I were to ever lose the chip, I would be hunted down by reclamation groups and said groups were authorized to use LETHAL FORCE. I'm so dead...

Day 3: October 21st, 2281
A Plain Beagle

Early to bed, and early to rise; Makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise.

Went to bed at about 6:00pm, woke up at about 6:00am. I'm gonna be the healthiest, richest and smartest person in the wasteland. Had nightmares about the Mojave Express sending a huge team of reclamation people and then they killed me. Then I woke up and realized something: I didn't lose the chip intentionally, and if I simply CONFESS that I lost the chip, all will be well.

So, Primm was my next stop. On the way I found a small Powder Gang camp. I ended up having to kill the two Gangers I found there. That's 5 people I've killed, but the raiders I don't mind killing, and Barton was just a major douchebag. Still, I don't WANT to kill people like crazy, it just happens. I ended up getting myself a nice plasma pistol to work with my laser pistol. Epicness. It fires really slowly, but it deals a nice amount of damage. Also, more damn geckos attacked me on the road to Primm. I'm not happy. I also encountered a radroach, but he went down not because of me, but because of the geckos, who promptly ate him. Poor roach. Still, those damn geckos hurt!

When I finally got to Primm (after a 3-hour trek) some NCR trooper told me Primm is off limits to travelers. I told him I could take care of myself. I stupidly forgot to ask WHY it was off limits, but he told me "Don't say you weren't warned."

When I crossed the bridge, I was greeted by landmines! And not the pressure sensitive kind, either! The MOTION SENSOR KIND! I suffered from a few broken limbs, but I just stuck some stimpaks in me and "et voila," bye bye broken bones. I was not warned about this!

First guy I encountered was dead when I got there. Daniel Wyand was what his notes said he was. One note was from the Mojave Express. I got a platinum chip, he got fuzzy dice, we both got shot. Now I wish I had never taken that job. Oh well...

Next guy I met was an escaped convict who decided he'd rather not be a Powder Ganger, and he and the rest of the raiders in this town have turned Primm into a hellhole. I killed them and looted them, along with Mr. Wyand. I got some ammo, some armor to repair my set, and some guns to fix my old ones. I essentially took all the parts I had and took the best to make as much of a mint-condition gun as possible.

I decided to head into the Vikki & Vance Casino, because the Bison Steve had a bit of a, err, well, there were a LOT of raiders there. I ran into a man named Johnson Nash, who is actually the guy in charge of the Mojave Express of Primm. I showed him my delivery order, and he told me that Victor was the guy who hired all SIX couriers to take all manner of different things to Freeside; a chess piece here, a fuzzy dice there. Also, I only got this job because the first deadbeat they hired CANCELLED. If it wasn't for that, I wouldn't be in the Mojave! Damn courier...

Anyways, he told me a few nights ago, some fella was out scavenging for supplies, when lo' and behold, they saw some guy in a daisy suit with some Great Khans. I forgot to write this down, but Chet told me that he saw some guys in a suit with some Great Khans. I really need to meet these Great Khans, because I have words...

Mr. Nash told me that my best bet would be to find Deputy Beagle, who had some great info on them. Unfortunately, he was held captive by raiders in the Bison Steve. So guess where I was going next? The Bison Steve. I got my guns ready and set off to Raiderville.

After plowing through a few raiders using a 9mm SMG, I got to Deputy Bagel, err, I mean, Beagle, through a maintenance door that was surprisingly easy to lockpick. Turns out Beagle is a freaking wimp. Firstly, I had to force him to give me info on the man in the suit, and then he decided he would run away like a baby. I told him that if he ran away, I'd kill him myself.

I'm pretty good at striking fear into the hearts of Jewish bread products. Pun intended.

We escaped with little to no resistance, but there is still a huge amount of raiders in the Bison Steve, so there's that. Beagle has told me that he's only the deputy, and he can't be deputy without a sheriff (I always thought that a deputy would take over in case the sheriff died, but whatever) and that I could either a). sneak into NCRCF and extract this guy named Meyers to be sheriff, or I could b). convince the NCR to protect the town. Both sounded like work, so I chose c). reprogram this robot I saw to protect the town.

You see, in the Vikki and Vance casino, there's this bot named Primm Slim. I remembered that robots like him are PROTECT-otrons, so he shall PROTECT Primm with super awesome robot stuff. So Primm has a new sheriff. Yippee!

Of course, I didn't have much to do in Primm after that, but I made a note to come back to deal with those raiders in the Bison Steve. I decided to head down south, since according to Bagel, my attackers headed towards Novac through Nipton, so that's where I'm going.

Of course, when I went to pick up supplies for my travels, I learned that Mr. Nash had an old, broken down robot in his shop. Told me I could take a look at if, and if I got it to work, that I could keep it. I couldn't get it to work though. I spent a few hours searching around town for the parts but I had no luck.

By that point, it was 7:30, so I had to get on the road. I found a bed and I'm getting ready to go to sleep. I've made count of what I got:

-Various ammo
-Some guns and armor to fix up my old stuff
-Some caps
-Some NCR Cash
-Some various bits and bobs
-Some DRUGZ!
-Some food and water
-Some magazines

I've also counted how many people I've killed. I've killed 9 people. About 8 were raiders or Barton Thorn, number 9 is probably Joe Cobb. I don't count him as a raider, I count him as a total idiot for trying to have 6 raiders against a town of about 14. The odds aren't even 1 to 2, it's 1 to 2.34. I've also killed 22 critters. Since I've not killed any more than people and geckos, I've killed 22 geckos. Wow.

I've actually decided to head north on I-15. I've heard they have a problem with critters in Quarry Junction, so I thought maybe I could help.

Day 4: October 22nd, 2281
ALIENS!

There are aliens among us. I know.

I headed up north past Sloan to check out the deathclaw problem. I made a quick U-turn after I saw some poor guy get killed within TWO HITS of that deathclaw's, well, claw. I made a plan to get to past them by sneaking past Black Mountain...

...only problem being the incredible SUPAH MOOTANTS, err... super mutants guarding the mountain. I couldn't even get within sneezing distance, so I had to take ANOTHER route past a small narrow passage. I found a dead NCR trooper on my way there. He got killed by a bear trap.

Speaking of bear traps, that entire passage was filled with bear traps that I had to disarm manually. I'm not even mentioning the huge boulders flying down the passage. I broke my leg, so I decided to stick a whole lotta stimpaks in my leg. It worked.

I soon had New Vegas in my sights. I was *this* close to Freeside's north gate when I saw something glowing towards the northwest. I decided to head there when lo' and behold, ALIENS. The alien captain, more specifically. They started shooting, so I ran back to Freeside. I'll come back later.

Sorry for the short entry, hypothetical diary reader person, but nothing of interest happened. Maybe I'll try sneaking onto the Strip... Nah, that sounds like too much work... I'll sleep in the Atomic Wrangler tonight. Maybe I'll play some blackjack later.

Day 5: October 23rd, 2281
Santiago is VIP! Santiago is a nice person! Santiago will be dead soon!

Today I decided to talk to the Follower's of the Apocalypse. Sure enough, they needed my help. A Ms. Julie Farkas (who answers to the name "Julie Farkas," strangely enough) told me that if Freeside needs two people sober; Old Bill Ronte and Jacob Hoff.

The solution was simple: Cut off the roots and the plant will wither. In this case, the addiction is the "plant," and the "roots" are the local dealers, in this case a man named Dixon. I promptly shot Dixon's head off. Bye bye, Dixon!

I persuaded Jacob Hoff to give up drugs, and I gave Bill Ronte some Fixer, Whiskey, and one other thing I can't remember. I also convinced the Garretts, who own the local casino, to lend the Followers their stills. Haven't told Julie yet.

Anyways, after I saved 'da day for Freeside, I talked to a Mr. Arcade Gannon. Turns out he's the head of the self-proclaimed "Fruitless Wastes of Time" division of the Followers. You know, stimpaks out of barrel cacti and other ingenious improbabilities. He was bored, so he decided to wander the wastes with me.

Also, remember the Garretts? Well, I took a job from them: Collecting payment. Back in the day, the Atomic Wrangler used to allow customers tabs. Needless to say, said customers walked out without paying the bills. I had to get money from three people, a ghoul named Grecks, a total pansy named Santiago, and a rich lady named Lady Jane.

Grecks gave me his money no problem. Santiago kept telling me various things such "Santiago is Freeside's VIP!" and "Santiago doesn't know what he did to offend, but Santiago owes no body!" I promptly punched him in the face. I think everyone in Freeside smiled at that.

Lady Jane told me that she has NO cash, but her caravan is trapped in the Broc Flower Cave, south of Novac. This gave me an idea: If I circle back to Primm, head south through Nipton, hit that cave, go north through Novac and Boulder City, and then get to Freeside, I can also find some more evidence as to who actually killed me while still being on the correct route to pay back the money! I am SUCH a GENIUS.

When I got to Primm, I was trapped in the Vikki and Vance casino by a NCR deserter named Layla and her team of thugs. I thought there might be a bounty on her head, so I shot her. Turns out that nobody wanted her dead, so I just murdered some people in cold blood. Now I feel bad... Sadface. But again, she tried to kill me for being on public property. In my eyes, she's just as guilty as, say, Barton Thorn! I forgot how much I hate Barton Thorn.

I'm staying in the casino. Hopefully nobody tries to kill me in my sleep...

Day 6: October 24th, 2281
Mo'jave, Mo' Problems

I had nightmares about all the people I killed. I'm kinda freaked out. As such, I've made a commitment to always try and find a peaceful solution to my problems. Still, there will ALWAYS be someone I have to kill. That's a fact of life in the wasteland. Still...

I checked in on Deputy Bagel (now I'm intentionally misspelling it) this morning while I was in Primm. He told me that now he's no longer a Deputy. Now he's just a Bagel. Now I feel bad for putting Slim in as sheriff. Poor Beagle the Bagel.

Still, his name still sounds like a delicious bread product.

Speaking of people I need to kill, I've brought an end to the reign of the Jackal gang. I was passing by when all of a sudden, RAIDERS. I started to shoot and I think someone must've switched out my guns for much stronger ones, since if I shoot some in the leg, their head pops off, and don't even ask what happens when I shoot the torso. Anywho, I got a nice Cowboy Repeater, which is like a revolver in a rifle. In that way, I was rewarded for doing a public service. How nice...

I headed further south, until I got to the NCR border control known as the Mojave Outpost. I was told that the entire place is backed up, mostly because of deathclaws and Powder Gangers, but also because there are giant freaking ants with giant freaking mouths and giant freaking appetites. Not only that, but some NCR ranger told me she hasn't heard anything from Nipton. Normally, that wouldn't be a problem but the town is smoking. She thought it was the Powder Gangs, and I can't say I don't blame her. Powder Gangers have been real assholes about everything.

I decided to head to Ivanpah Dry Lake to clear out the critters to make everyone's lives easier. Plus, Ranger Jackson, the head honcho of Mojave Outpost, told me he might "lose" some supplies if I help him. What an great, if not slightly untrustworthy, guy. I certainly like him more than, say, BARTON FREAKING THORN. I still can't get over that.

Arcade was getting pretty antsy with the whole killing people thing, but he doesn't seem to mind unless I accidentally shoot some one on the side of good and righteousness and the Anti-Barton Thorn club. I made that last part up but if Arcade had met Barton Thorn, he would understand.

It turns out that if you don't make eye contact with them, ants are real pansies. I simply used my repeater to snipe 'em off, one by one. Only one of them noticed me, and he got a bullet to the face before he got within 20 yards. I'm freaking EPIC.

Anyways, I went back to Ranger Jackson for a reward. He said he told me nothing of a reward, but told me a requisition form or two could get lost. I got some food, a service rifle(like a varmint rifle but better), 72 armor-piercing 5.56 rounds, and some generic parts to repair my weapons, along with 100 caps. That's fun, but it's a shame he couldn't get more work.

I decided to wait out the rest of the night outside the barracks, and then head to Nipton to report my findings. Here's to a good trip...

Day 7: October 25th, 2281
Shoot-out Sunday

Merry Sunday, every one! For some, a time to pray to a higher power. For others, a time to relax and maybe drink a warm one. I get shot in the face on Sundays.

First was the ants. I made the mistake of trying to inspect a dead Radscorpion. I was attacked by about 15 giant ants. Me and Arcade had a very hard time killing them all, especially since we were about 20 yards from a raider camp.

The Jackals, ticked off that we killed their leader, decided to screw it all and attack us. We killed them all, but I took some serious damage to the face, and I took an addictive chem. I'm feeling kinda woozy... Also, Arcade actually melted a guy using his plasma defender. He is now a green splat on the world. A fitting end to such an asshole.

We didn't get much loot. A few sets of leather armor to repair my own, some 10mm pistols, a bit of ammo, but best of all were the explosives. I really think that these could do me some good. I'm thinking of selling the 4 mines, but keeping the 2 grenades. I'll have to find a buyer, first.

Then there was Tomas. Tomas had star caps. I want star caps. I asked politely for them. He shot me. I shot back. He died. I took his caps. Then I saw he was previously attacked by a cap collector who died while fighting Tomas. I took her caps, too.

Then I got to Nipton. It wasn't the Powder Gangers. It wasn't Khans. It was a bunch of crazy costumed freaks who act like Romans. And not the part of them thats artistic and nice, no, the kind that keeps slaves and burns down towns. I, I... I really don't want to talk about it. They called themselves the Legion, and that if I felt strongly that they were evil, that I should attack them and then I wouldn't feel a thing. They looked tough, so I let them live.

Still, it was horrible. Some people were burned, some people were crucified, and the lucky ones got their heads chopped off. Turns out it was a "lottery." First place was sent free, second place was allowed to live, but they got their legs beat with hammers. Third place runner-ups were enslaved, and the rest died. I met first place on my way in, and I met second place on my way out.

Guy was named Boxcars. He had a dirty mouth and called me "the Powder Ganger grim f^(#!% reaper." I really can't blame him. I killed Job Cobb and I'm actually contemplating breaking in to attack the entire facility. I gave Boxcars a dose of Med-X and headed out of Nipton. He told me there were enslaved Gangers if I wanted to help, not like he gave a f^(#. Unquote, Boxcars.

I didn't care about the Gangers, so I headed for Nipton. I remember from back in California that a friend of mine had visited Novac through Nipton, and that the road was littered with land mines, so to play it safe, I went on the canyon wall instead. Then I realized I still needed to tell the NCR what happened, so I started for Mojave Outpost.

I told the ranger what had happened. She and the local sergeant agreed that at this rate, the NCR is surely doomed. I disagreed, but they wouldn't listen. Still, at least they're prepared for what'll happen if the Legion goes past Nipton.

I decided to sleep in Nipton tonight. I swear this place'll give me nightmares for a week.