I'm SUPER excited about Invader Zim returning! So I wrote an Invader Zim fic! But those of you in the TMNT fandom already know me as a "heartbreaker", so you know what to expect. For those of you who don't know me, be prepared...
The Present
This just in: the alien invader has arrived in Washington, D.C. Residents have been ordered to evacuate the city as soon as possible, while the military continues to fire at the giant robot that is approaching the White House. But it doesn't look like the robot will be slowing down anytime soon. As for President Man, he is just now being escorted to the helicopter that will take him away from the Capitol.
"Hurry, Mr. President Man!" an agent dragged the leader of the U.S toward the helicopter that awaited them, its blades spinning and producing a great wind. "We haven't a moment to lose!"
But the cross-eyed, deranged old man struggled to get out of the man's grasp. "No, wait! We can't leave yet! I left my baseball cards and favorite choo-choo train in my room!"
"I'm sorry, but I can't let you back into the White House, sir!" the agent said as they got closer to the helicopter. "I've been entrusted with your safety, and by God, I will make sure that no harm comes to-"
A giant metallic foot suddenly stomped on the helicopter, completely crushing it. President Man and his agent both gapped at the destruction before them before slowly lifting their heads to the owner of the foot. The robot that had gotten through America's best defense system and completely obliterated more than half of the country was now standing over them. A silhouette with large red eyes glared down at them through the dome that was the robot's head.
"He-Here!" the agent suddenly pushed President Man toward the looming machine. "Take him! But don't hurt me!" The cowardly man tried to run away from the area, but then a beam of light showered over him, and once it had dissipated, there was nothing left of him but a black, hot spot on the ground.
President Man jump started to cry and he got on his knees, looking up at the robot with pleading, scared eyes. "Please don't hurt me!" he begged. "We-we surrender! Take whatever you want! Just don't hurt me!" He bowed low to the alien invader while continuing to pathetically cry.
The dome hissed as it slowly lifted, and the new conqueror of Earth stepped out and quickly climbed down the machine. Two black boots landed on the grass and walked over to the bowing President. The former leader heard the footsteps get closer and slowly lifted his head from the ground.
A little green alien in a red tunic and wearing black gloves stared down at him with cold, bloodthirsty red eyes. The antennas on his head sank back and he curled his lips into a snarl to reveal horrible zipper teeth.
"You are asking for Zim's mercy?" he hissed.
Frantically, President Man nodded his head, more tears spilling from out of his eyes.
The invader merely scoffed and a long metallic spider leg popped out of his pak. "You will not get any mercy from me, hu-man," he spat out the last word in disgust as he aimed the sharp tip of the leg at the man's forehead, making him cry even more. "Because you don't deserve it. None of you filthy Earth beasts deserve the mercy of Zim."
The leg came down with full force, and blood splattered all over his face.
Two Months Ago
The door to the Deetention room slammed open, and the underpaid, disgruntled supervisor looked up from his newspaper to see the hideous Ms. Bitters holding two students by the collars of their shirts. He recognized them as Dib Membrane, the big-headed son of the world renowned Professor Membrane, and Zim, the wierd green-skinned foreign student who always screamed his head off.
Ms. Bitters slithered into the room like a snake with her students still in her grasp. "This one brought a gun to class!" she said as she lifted Zim before lifting Dib, as well. "And this one is annoying!"
The supervisor lifted an eyebrow and lowered his glasses. "Okay, him, I can understand," he pointed at Zim. "But why exactly is Membrane in Deetention?"
"Why not?" Dib sarcastically mumbled, before being silenced by Bitters' bloodcurdling hissing. The teacher shoved them both into their desks before slithering out of the room within a matter of seconds.
The supervisor cleared his throat before getting out of his chair and reaching for something in one of the drawers of his desk. "Well, you two will be stuck with me for the next three hours. Sounds boring, right?"
The two said nothing and continued to pout, glancing at each other hatefully.
"Well, not to worry," he pulled out two large bundles of paper. "You will be quite busy for the next three hours." He slammed a bundle and pencil on Dib and Zim's desk. "Your assignment is to write a ten-page report on what you did wrong with your lives. If you're not finished by the end of the day...eh, whatever. Just don't disrupt my reading time." He walked back to his desk and resumed his reading, chuckling at the comics on the funny page.
Grumbling, Dib took his penci and began to write, but he stopped for a moment to glance at Zim, who was nonchalantly balancing the pencil on his lower lip.
"How can you be so calm?" Dib sneered.
"Eh?" Zim looked over at Dib with his "human" eyes.
"You made a big mistake in bringing that shrink ray to class, Spaceboy," Dib chuckled darkly. "Surely they'll wonder why a 'normal' human boy would have a shrinking device in his backpack."
Now Zim was the one chuckling, and this concerned Dib.
"Foolish Dib," Zim spun the pencil around in his gloved fingers. "Did you really think I'd leave any of my weapons in the possession of this...fffffilthy skool? After Bitters confiscated the shrink ray and put it in her desk, I activated the emergency self-destruct sequence. It's nothing but a pile of ashes now. So much for your 'evidence'. Bah ha ha ha!"
This greatly angered Dib and he unconsciously snapped the pencil right in half. He instantly regretted it, though. "Oh, great," he mumbled. He noticed that Zim was still fiddling with his pencil. "Hey, uh, since you're not using yours, can I...?" Before Dib could even finish, the pencil was thrown at his head, and it harmlessly bounced off him with a boink. "Thanks," he muttered as he bent down to pick it up.
He resumed his writing, though he couldn't help but wonder about something. Without looking up from his paper, Dib asked Zim, "So why did you bring a shrink ray to skool in the first place?"
"I was going to shrink your hippo-sized head," Zim answered almost immediately, his arms folded and his feet resting on the desk.
Dib rolled his eyes. "Ha ha, very funny."
Zim wasn't laughing, though. "No, really."
At this, Dib turned to look at Zim, and by the look on his face, he could see that the alien was, indeed, being serious. "You...were going to shrink my head?"
"Hmm," Zim nodded.
"But why?"
"Because it makes me sick to look at your ugly face every day in that classroom. And obviously, the other children feel the same way," Zim added with a cruel grin. "By shrinking your head to the size of a pea, Zim would've been doing the whole class a favor. Especially Mosley, since your head blocks his view of the blackboard."
Dib growled and turned his attention back to the paper. "I'm well aware that everyone hates me."
Zim grunted in agreement. "Yes, they do."
"You don't have to rub it in," Dib hissed. "I already have to live with the fact that people will always think I'm crazy just because I don't think like them or see the world the way they do. I'll never be accepted by them."
The alien snickered. "Yes, it is rather pathetic. To be an outcast on your own planet. To be hated by your own species and never be taken...seriously..."
"Besides, no invader has ever been so...very small. You're very small, Zim. You're a tiny thing."
Zim bit his lower lip, his squeedly-spooch aching for some reason. He quickly changed the subject. "So...why is your head so big?"
"My head's not big," Dib mumbled, still working on his report.
"Is that so? Well, then, you are either in denial or you are stupid."
"You're stupid."
"Hmph."
Nothing more was said between them for the next thirty minutes. While Dib was preoccupied with his report, Zim was bored out of his mind, fidgeting in his desk and occasionally popping his lips, much to Dib's annoyance.
Then Dib felt something hit the side of his face. It didn't hurt, but it certainly caught his attention. He looked down at the floor to find a paper airplane and reached down to pick it up. He unfolded it and read the words, "YOU STINK!" in red ink, plus a "Love, Zim," at the bottom right-hand corner. Dib glared at the alien, who pretended to be innocent and whistled.
Dib noticed that though he was nearly finished with his assignment, there was still plenty of paper left in his bundle. Taking a spare, he wrote something down and then folded the paper into an airplane. He threw it at Zim's head, but the alien caught before it could hit him. Zim unfolded it and read the message, "YOU SMELL!" and a, "Love, Dib," at the bottom left-hand corner.
Zim growled deep in his throat and took another paper from his bundle. He folded another airplane and threw it at Dib. The human dodged it and made another airplane of his own. He threw it at Zim, who merely flicked it away. Then Dib folded another airplane, and then another. Zim did the same, and paper airplanes flew everywhere in the classroom. Amazingly, the supervisor never even noticed the paper war that was happening around him. Well, actually, it was because he was already asleep in his sleep with the newspaper covering his face.
Zim could hear the sound of laugher filling the room as they continued with the paper airstrike. He peeked over his desk to find Dib smiling and giggling as he folded another airplane from behind his own desk. And someone else was laughing in the room, but who? It couldn't have possibly been the fat, smelly lord of Deetention. So it must've been...
...Zim?
The invader immediately stopped laughing as he realized that he was actually having fun with...the Dib! His sworn enemy! The very spike in his thigh! No! This was absolute madness! He mustn't lose sight of his mission! The reason he came to this ball of dirt and mud in the first place! He was ZIM! Soon-to-be-conqueror of-
"What's the matter, Zim?" he heard Dib laugh. "Giving up already? If you can't beat me at paper airplane fights, what makes you think you can take over the world?"
Zim narrowed his eyes in determination and grabbed another airplane. Zim? Give up? Never!
Over forty airplanes later, Zim and Dib sat on the floor together, panting and chuckling weakly. The supervisor continued to snore loudly underneath his newspaper. Paper airplanes were scattered about them.
"Not...bad...Spaceboy," Dib gasped.
"Heh heh...you...fight well...Earth-smell," Zim admitted.
"You know," Dib softly said as he picked up a nearby paper airplane and fiddled with it, "this is the first time I've ever played this game with...well, anybody. I haven't had this much fun in years."
"Eh?" Zim tilted his head in confusion. "'Game'? I thought we were engaging in another battle for Earth, like we always do."
Dib instantly realized what he just said and cleared his throat, crumbling the paper into a ball. "Um, right. Why would I ever play games with you? I hate your guts." He threw the paper ball at Zim's head and turned his back to him.
The alien didn't dodge or catch it this time, and it bounced off his black wig. "Yes," Zim quietly agreed and turned away as well, "and Zim hates the Dib. So very much so."
Save for the supervisor's snoring, it was very quiet in the room. Then Dib finally spoke, "We should probably clean up this place before he wakes up. Otherwise, we might end up going to Deetention for the rest of the year."
Zim shuddered at the thought of being locked in Deetention with Dib every day and immediately helped him pick up the airplanes.
...
It was finally time for them to go home, and they headed for the front entrance together. But they said nothing to each other and their footsteps echoed in the now empty halls. When they finally reached the doors and stepped outside, they shared one last glance.
"So, um," Dib awkwardly scratched the back of his neck, "see you tomorrow, I guess?"
Zim merely grunted in agreement before darting away. Things were becoming very awkward and weird between them, and it made Zim feel extremely uncomfortable. He finally reached the sanctuary of his house/base, but before he opened the front door, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a paper airplane, observing it in his hand.
He didn't want to admit it in front of Dib...in fact, he didn't even want to admit it to himself...but he had..fun today.
After taking one last look at the airplane, he tossed it into the air, watching it fly gracefully...until a bird suddenly knocked into it, causing to crash into the street...and eventually be run over by a passing car.
Shaking his head in disappointment, Zim glared at the dirty, crumbled piece of paper before stepping into his base and slamming the door shut.
"HIIIII!"
"GIR! What I have told you about bringing filthy street animals into our base?! Shoo! Shoo! Get out of Zim's base! No! Get back! AHHH! GET IT OFF! GET IT OFF! GET IT OFF!"
"Awwww, it likes you."
So that's it for the first chapter! And no, this won't be a ZADR fic. Sorry (not sorry ;) )