Hey, first fanfic publish on here? Yep! Unbeta-ed? Yep!
Ignore the dots, this thing doesn't like my format so I had to compromise with it.
Disclaimer- All of the stuff you think you know, yeah it's not mine. Emotional baggage that comes with it, now that's mine. Sadly.
She was sitting down in a small room at the back of the church. The one that was reserved from brides. Yeah, that one. The one that she wanted to be a million miles away from. Not in a poofy floor length sparkling white dress. Not with Hermione in a brides maid dress reassuring her that it's normal to have some doubts and then spiral on about her own pre wedding jitters when she was getting married to Ron. Not with Luna chiming in every so often with seemingly unrelated facts. Not not not.
Not getting married to Harry Fucking Potter in about oh, 30 minutes.
.
Perhaps I'll never get to tell you again how much you mean-meant to me and it's much too late now.
.
She can hear Hermione leaving her side to open to the door, poke her head outside and whisper something to someone.
Do you want to hear what's she saying brain? Yes, yes you do.
"...It's nothing, no, Ginny is just having pre wedding jitters. Of course not Ron, I can't let you inside, No, I can't let you inside either Harry. Go back to your room! You know it's bad luck to see the wedding dress before the wedding. Yes, I know it's the wedding now and it still doesn't count..."
Or not.
Ginny felt rooted to the spot, she could hear her mother in the back ground quietly sniffling and discussing with Luna how much of a big girl she is now.
Oh look, a window. A nice big shiny window to distract yourself from the fact that you're going to get married. Or about to. To someone you shouldn't.
.
Because I'm getting married and you've stopped fighting for me. For us. I remember, don't worry.
You stopped fighting for me a long time ago.
.
What's the time now? Uhhhh, 20 minutes to go. Fuck. Maybe I could still escape through that big shiny window in front of me. Now there is an idea. That's a bloody brilliant idea!
"Ginny!" Ron emerged from the other side of the door and stepped into the room that Ginny fondly named The Room That Signals The End Of Everything. Or maybe that was the church? Clearly Hermione had caved in and let Ron in.
"Careful Ron! Don't rip her dress! And for heaven sakes don't you dare ruin her hair!" Molly growled as a grinning Ron approached Ginny. "What's up sis? You look a little...shell shocked there. No having second thoughts are we?"
"...I'm fine."
"If you say so. Don't worry though, I made sure that Harry didn't get too friendly with any of the female strippers if you know what I mean."
"RON! YOU INIVITED STRIPPERS TO HARRY'S BACHELOR PARTY?"
"Well...erm..."
Time to zone out.
.
I never did get to say those words out loud. Never got to tell you what I was really thinking when ever you caught me staring at you. I'm sorry for shaking my head and kept on saying it's nothing when it clearly wasn't.
.
15.
That's a face. Actually that's several faces. Several different faces of all of my lovely brothers. Well, clearly Ron and Hermione aren't fighting again because I can't hear any raised voices which means that those two are some where cuddling up to each other. Ick.
"I'm fine. No really, I'm fine. Sorry, I'm just a little...distracted."
Ginny put on a smile for the show and tried to reassure her brothers that she was just peachy and it was just normal wedding jitters that she was feeling. Nothing more, nothing less.
After all, it was a big day for her and surely they could forgive her for being a little bit more spacey than usual?
"Honestly Ginny, I don't know what I'm going to do with you." Molly shook her head as each of her brothers gave her a quick hug ever mind fill of the agonising pain they would feel if god forbid they ruined her hair, ripped her dress or damaged her glowing appearance in general.
Funny how on the outside she never looked more beautiful and on the inside she was never more worthless.
.
But when I see you I'm thinking them over and over in my head.
.
Oh look, another face. A Luna type of face. That's getting closer and closer. Luna's face stopped within inches of Ginny's face. "He says that's he's sorry. For everything." Her soft voice travelled through the air to Ginny's ear and she felt her breath hitch in an upwards direction.
"When? When did he say that?" Her eyes searched Luna's face as to see if it would open up and spit out the answer she wanted.
"A few days ago...He's not here. Somewhere overseas, says it's for the best. Says that he'll shake Harry hand only after he makes you happy."
I can't break now.
"Fuck Luna."
"I'm sorry. I would take away your pain if I could."
It's okay, Luna was there. She knows – knew. She gets it. She understands.
"There there, no crying. You might attract the witsflalands and that would be most seriously unfortunate. I love you Ginny."
"I love you too Luna. Really." That's right mouth, corners up wards so that we don't worry Luna any more.
.
Only I won't say them.
.
Surely it must be nearly time now? "Ginny, let's start to get ready, we have 10 more minutes!" Ah. Thank you Mum. 10 minutes to go. Moving moving moving, moving moving moving. Bouquet? Got. Hair? Fine. Make up? Perfect. Dress? Poofy and white but unripped. Still harbouring dreams that he will come charging into the church and profess his undying love to me? Always.
.
Even if I wanted to.
.
"Come here Ginny, give your old mum a quick hug before you go down the isle." Molly lightly hugged her youngest child with tears in her eyes. She had almost lost hope that Ginny and Harry would marry but here they are, about to get married. "Don't forget that marriage is forever." Molly said sternly looking deep into Ginny's eyes. "Muuuuuum! I know!" Ginny laughed it off, ignoring the panicky feeling that rose with the realisation of Ohshit- I am actually going to do this. Forever. With the wrong person. The End.
.
Because you'll get that look in your eyes and it will shatter the dream.
.
Molly handed Ginny over to Arthur and left the room with Hermione and Luna.
"Gin-bug, you look beautiful."
"Thanks dad. You look pretty smashing yourself."
"Are you ready?"
Ginny took a shuddering breath. She couldn't back out now.
"As ready as I'll ever be."
.
Step.
.
That lovely dream that keeps me breathing.
.
Step.
.
I'll say it now – I love you.
.
Step.
.
I love you
.
Step.
.
I love you
.
Step.
.
I love you.
.
Fast-forward.
"Do you take Harry James Potter to be your lawfully wedded Husband?"
"I do."
.
I'll fucking miss you. Always.
.
"I will now ask if any one objects to the marriage of Ginvera Molly Weasley and Harry James Potter speak now or forever hold your silence. No? Good. I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride."
.
I love you Draco Malfoy.