xXTehBlueNaruXx: This is a story that myself and my friend, Jentomboy, have been working on. Thank you Jen for all your work, support, and help! I couldn't have done this without you! XOXO. Enjoy!

The Voice Of My Heart

Chapter 1- Whispers

Gen sighed as he returned from another night of protecting Karasumori. He was tired, and his head was killing him. His atire was his usual, a night troops robe, with two stars on both sides of his chest. The robe was a dark purple, which matched nicely with the silver stars. Gen's hair was black and spiky, and his eyes were a solemn black. The boy's skin was tanned, and he had a somewhat eccentric nose. Gen stared at the ground, clinching his teeth. Something kept pounding through his head like a headache...whispering..

Yoshimori...

Gen tried to listen to the voice, to find out who it was. But he knew all too well who it was. The voice was a male one, one that soothed Gen's ears yet made his head ache all at the same time. Even though Gen's head was pounding, he closed his eyes and listened to that voice.

Yoshimori..

He gripped his head, unable to comprehend what's going on. "GET OUT! SHUT UP!" He screamed, his teeth grinding, heart pounding.

'Why can't I stop thinking of him?' Gen thought. 'I don't understand any of this..Who keeps...whispering his name?'

The voice laughed at him.

You don't know? I'm sure you do, Gen. Gen winced. He knew who it was.

Gen sighed, and opened his oak door that lead into his apartment. He sulked inside, and sat down on the couch in the living room. He looked at the walls, which were white. He gazed at the rest of the room. Across from him was a chair, and on the other end was a table and some coushins. He had to admit, it was too empty in sighed, and let his thoughts, and his headache, take over.

'It's not like tonight changed anything..did it?' That question echoed through Gen's head, as he rememered the event that took place a few hours ago._

-Flashback-

The night seemed so calm. The bugs were chirping and buzzing, crickets moaned their soft song, the breeze was...just outstanding. It swirmed inside of you, and refreshed your spirit. Gen sniffed the air. He was thankful the night was lovely tonight. It made him feel better. Gen gazed into the sky, tonight seemed especially beautiful and calm 'Maybe no ayakashi will show up...'

Gen was so caught up in his star-gazing that he failed to hear the sound of Yoshimori running up to him.

"GEEEEEEEEEEEEN!" Yoshimori shouted, waving enthusiactally.

Yoshimori was of medium height and build, with blue hair. (Is it blue? Well it is now!) He had blue eyes, a medium-sized round nose and pale skin compared to Gen's tan complection. Yoshimori was the kind of niave lazy boy you grew to love and hate all at the same time.

Sadly now it was hate. Gen sighed 'When will he learn to stop being so annoying?'

Yoshimori was still yelling his name, so Gen threw up a hand, waving back. Gen started walking once more.

"WAIT UP!" Yoshimori shouted, running towards the tan male. Gen made a sour face. "UGH WHY CAN'T YOU EVER WAIT!"

Gen sighed again.. "Maybe because you're slow?" He grumbled apatheticly.

"I am NOT slow! At least I'm not an ass!"

Gen growled at Yoshimori coldly. "Shut up.." He snarled.

'What a relief..we're almost there..' Gen jumped onto the gate, and dissappeared.

"GEN WAIT!" Yoshimori screamed, but of course, it was too late. Gen had run off, again.

'What the hell is his problem today?' Yoshimori wondered angerly.

A couple hours passed by, and no aykashi or Gen in sight.

"Hey Tokine, does something seem off about Gen?" Yoshimori asked.

"Well, he does appear to be more on-edge than usual." Tokine states matter-of-factly shaking her head. "I really don't know Yoshimori. There doesn't seem to be any ayakashi, so you can go see if you want. I'll stay here in case any show up."

"Alright.." Yoshimori made a kekkai and jumped onto a tree.

"GEN! WHERE ARE YOU?" Yoshimori called out Gen's name over and over for at least half an hour..nothing..

'Where is he?'

"GEEN!" He called once more.

Finally he saw Gen's black spikes, and smiled. 'Found you.'

Yoshimori landed next to Gen, not suprising him.

Gen barely glanced in Yoshimori's direction, and uttered "What?"

Yoshimori looked into Gen's eyes, getting straight to the point.

"What's the matter with you, Gen?" Yoshimori asked, his eyes full of concern, something Gen hadn't seen in a long time, startling him. Gen stared into his eyes a bit more, puzzled. 'What's with..his eyes? It's like he's looking into me..Oh whatever. It's just fake. I can tell.'

"Nothing. There's no reason you should ask anyway, we're not even friends." Gen said,sounding annoyed and exhuasted. He could see all through Yoshimori's scheme. Pretending to care, asking what's wrong, oh sure he cares, sure. "It makes no difference what you all say, you don't see me as your friend.."

"What the hell Gen! Of course we do! What's gotten into you?" Yoshimori was hurt. Of course he cared about him! Like hell he didn't! Yoshimori kept trying. 'He can be difficult sometimes..' He speculated.

Gen grimaced, knowing if he didn't tell him, Yoshimori would get it out of him somehow.

"Lately, I keep seeing and hearing things reminding me of who I really am..just some ayakashi." Gen gulped out of anger and despair. He hated the thought of being an ayakashi. He just wanted to be human, and for someone to love him the way he was. Not for someone to abondon him for who he was, and wish he was something else. If he could have affection, nothing else mattered... "The fact I'm human is just a grace from God. Atora comming just makes me think of myself as some monster to be tamed.." Gen cut off, not wanting to say more. Monster. Monster. Monster. Those words put anguish and grief into his heart. Anguish over who he was. Grief over what he'd done, and what he could be.

Yoshimori stood there for a moment, looking deeper into his eyes, trying to see what Gen was feeling. He hid the fact that he had no idea Gen thought this way. It made him want to hug Gen. To think of yourself as some beast, and to actually be one. He kept examining Gen's eyes, feeling for him.

"And it's just..I've known that a long time, but now I realize how disgusting it is. I want to get close to people, but I'm..I'm afraid they'll hate me once they know who I am.." Gen winced, his hands gripping the tree branch underneath, making the bark break.

Yoshimori listened the entire time, and thought, enjoying the beautiful night, the breeze was so breath-taking, and yet it sounded like it was weeping. It reminded him of the boy in front of him.

The two boys sat there for a while, what seemed like forever. Gen was nervous. He had never said anything like this to anyone, and he was very afraid of what Yoshimori would say. Throughout that angonising silence, Gen tapped his fingers nervously, and looked every-which way, trying to avoid Yoshimori's gaze. The quiet was broken by Yoshimori embracing Gen tightly.

Yoshimori spoke right in Gen's ear, which make Gen shiver everytime Yoshimori murmured. "Gen, I don't understand how you feel, and I never will..But you're not a monster! You were never a monster! People love you, just the way you are. You have friends, and people that care about you. If you were a monster, you wouldn't have any of that." Throughout all that, Gen closed his eyes, and took it all in. His heart was racing the entire time, and yet he loved it. Yoshimori's words passed through Gen's ears like music. Those were the words his heart was dying to hear. Gen trembled, and he broke the hug. He felt like he was going to break-down.

"Thank you.." Gen said, as sweetly as he could muster, but it was still slightly bitter. Gen sprang up and ran away.

'Why..does he think that way? He knows I'm half- ayakashi, and he doesn't care..he..he doesn't care..' Gen spent the next couple hours or so pondering all that happened. He still couldn't comprehend it all...

Gen's thoughts were inteupted, as he saw Tokine, and decided to tell her he was heading home. He couldn't be around if Yoshimori was still there.

"Tokine." Gen stated flatly.

"Gen! Yoshi was looking for you."

"I know. I'm heading home."

"I suppose you can. I don't see any ayakashi anywhere..we can call it a night. I'll tell Yoshimori once I see him."

Gen nodded, not bothering to say anything before he sprang up, and disapeared in a flash.

-End of Flashback-

After Gen had gone over the night, he still couldn't pinpoint where the voice was comming from. It kept, whispering to him...

Yoshimori...

Gen's heart beated faster, just the thought of him, saying those things.. The voice spoke up, and finished his sentence.

Just the thought of him saying those things makes you feel pleasure, doesn't it? It laughed it's almost mocking laugh. You wanted him to hug you more. I can tell. It's so fun to watch you suffer. It laughed again, and again, and again. Gen's pupils shrunk as he clutched his pant legs. 'What...does it mean? I don't feel that way! I never did!' Gen grunted, confused. He breathing staggered, he couldn't take this god damn voice anymore..

Aww..little Gen can't take me? Why, I'm your desires. I may be mean now, but I get nicer.. You could almost sense an evil grin.

Gen ignored the voice's whispers. It wasn't worth listening to..it wasn't his heart. Or his desires. He had a clue of who it was.

And it made him afraid.

But his mind finally calmed down. By now Gen was laying down on the couch, staring at the ceiling. His thoughts took over again.

'I keep, hearing his name, and his voice, repeating what he said..'

"People love you, just the way you are. If you were a monster, you wouldn't have any of that."

Yoshimori's voice kept ringing and ringing inside his head, calling out to him, telling him that he wasn't disgusting, ugly, and vile...Gen couldn't accept it.

"You're not a monster! You were never a monster!"

"I'm...not?" Gen whispered. His claws appeared before him, and he stared at them. His face was disgusted, and shocked.

'How...is this, not a monster? How?'

Gen gripped the side of his head with his hands, confused and angry. He rocked

Yoshimori...

Gen started breathing hard, and wobbled to his room. He turned the doorknob, and staggered inside. He quickly undressed, ready to just go to sleep.

Sleep was a virtue, far from his grasp then. Gen laid there, and thought, and thought, and thought.

'The look in his eyes..when he said it, he meant it..and he looked into my eyes, he didn't just whisper it and whimper away like most people who denied my self-esteem did..It was..sincere, really sincere.'

Gen smiled slightly, finally realizing how much all his friends cared about him. Yoshimori was still on his mind, however. His face..when he said it, his dimeanor, the seriousness in his voice..it was so compassionate.

'They care..at least, he does...'

Gen quietly went to sleep, and slept peacefully until the next morning.

Yoshimori's P.O.V.

I looked back and watched Gen jump away..he seemed upset.

'Why did he seem so sad? I was just trying to reassure him that he's not so gross as he thinks he is..oh well, it's Gen. Who knows.'

I sat there for a while, trying to go through what had just happened. 'Maybe I was too direct with him..Gen is more sensative then he lets on.'

"Lately, I keep seeing and hearing things reminding me of who I really am..just some ayakashi."

"He's not just some ayakashi..he's..my friend." I whispered, some sadness showing in my eyes.

'I can't believe he would even think that..It just doesn't make sense..Well, it actually does..' Gen, for all of his life, has been treated like just some screw up half-ayakashi. Plus he hurt his sister...I lowered my head. He must feel horrible about himself. Having to see those claws, knowing he hurt his own flesh and blood. I bet he can still smell the blood...

The wind picked up, and I just stared at the sky..it was so pretty tonight. It's kind of ironic that Gen was so depressed on such a gorgous night.

"At least I got in his head." I said. Hopefully I got through to him that we care. That I care about him. More than he knows. I don't care what he is...I like him for who he is. Gen. Gen Shishio. My friend, and teammate.

I decided to get up, and did so, then I walked around, and sooner or later I found Tokine. She looked tired, she had sweat on her, and she had a look of worry across her face. Tokine had long brown hair, big eyes, and a triangular face. Her eyes were brown, the same color as her hair, and had the same tone to her skin as Yoshimori. She wasn't breath-taking, but she was pretty beautiful.

"Yoshimori! I've been searching for you everywhere!" Tokine yelled. She looked kind of pissed too. Whoops. Maybe I shouldn't run off and have a heart-to-heart talk with Gen alot.

"Hey!" I said, waving non-chalantly and smiling.

Tokine caught up to me, and she was panting pretty hard.

'She must have been searching for a while...'

"There aren't any ayakashi, and Hakabi doesn't sense any either, so I'm calling it a night, okay?"

"That's fine. Madarao couldn't find anything either." Madarao had become tired and took a nap somewhere a while ago, that lazy dog.

"Let's go, honey!" Hakabi said. God he always calls her honey, I bet he just wants in her pants..the pervert. Hakabi was a dog spirit with a blackish-blue coat, and wore a green collar made of beads. He had blue eyes, with circles for eyes.

"Did you figure out what was wrong with Gen?" Tokine said. I almost forgot to tell her.

"Yeah, he keeps thinking we hate him because he's a 'monster'." I did air quotes to emphasize how much he used that damn word.

"Oh..well, at least we know why he was upset."

I scratched the back of my head smiling innocently.

"Riiight..about that..I think I made it worse. I told him some things to encourage him, like we care about him, and he got ticked or upset or something and left.." Of course, trying be innocent doesn't work with Tokine.

"You WHAT?" 'Oh shit! Now I'm gonna get it!'

"Idiot!" Tokine formed a rectangular kekkai that hit me on the head.

"OUCH! WHAT WAS THAT FOR?"

"You made Gen worse! What else what it be for?"

"He'll be fine and back to his blankself tommorow anyway." I said, trying to sound as smart as she always did.

"Ugh, fine. Okay. I need to get home."

Tokine ran off, with Hakabi chasing after her.

"WAIT HONEY!"

'Finally..they left. Now I need to find Madarao..wherever he is.'

I looked around, and it didn't take me that long to find the ghost dog laying under a tree, snoozing. He's probably dreaming about that guy he drooled over. Madarao was a white dog spirit with the same stature and shape as Hakabi, but with green eyes and a purple collar. I walked over to him and leaned over him.

"HEY MUTT WAKE UP!"

Madarao jolted up, annoyed.

"BE QUIET, BOY! I WASN'T ASLEEP!"

"Yeah yeah, whaatever. Let's head home."

Madarao grumbled for a bit when we were walking home. That dog sure could push your buttons sometimes. He yawned, and kind of spaced out. Well, I don't think there's a time when he isn't spacing out.

"Were there any ayakashi?" He said, sounding stupid. 'Aren't you the one who's supposed to know?' I did a face-palm in my head. Can he really be this stupid?

I didn't want to get into a shouting match again, so I decided to be nice to him (for once.)

"Nope. We all agreed to head home early. And from the looks of it Gen went home a long time ago."

Madarao just keep on floating, his mind wondering off again. I gazed up for the millionth time tonight and looked at the stars. 'Gen probably saw them when he got home. I hope he's okay.'

"The stars are incredible." I managed to say, not sure of what else to talk about, and only about a block from home.

"Yeah, I haven't seen a night like this for a while. It's relaxing." Madarao spoke calmly.

'At least he's not being a jerk or a spazz tonight..'

Madarao and I walked the rest of the way home in silence, and said our goodbyes when we got there. I walked in, took my shoes off, and went to my room. I layed down in my bed, and thought about my talk with Gen for a bit, and went to sleep.

'Tommorow I'm going to talk to Gen more, and show him just how much I care about him!'

Normal P.O.V.

Gen and Yoshimori went to bed thinking of the same thing: the talk they had. It was the beginning of a wonderful connection between them. They both went to bed and slept soundly. The voice in Gen's head whispered one more thing into his head before he drifted off into dreamland.

'Hehe, your budding feelings will only get worse.' His voice again almost gave way to an evil smile. 'And I'll only get louder. Listen to me, I'm your heart.' Gen kept hearing the voice in his dreams.

'I'm your heart...'

But in his dreams, Gen had made up his mind, and he confronted the voice. His face was determined, and dead serious. "Yoshimori's my heart. Not you."

"Love isn't seeing the perfect person. It's seeing an imperfect person, perfectly."

A/N: This is my very first time writing (and publishing) fanfiction. Despite that fact, whatever flaws you may see, I'd like to know about. I'd also like to say that if enough people like it I'll keep adding chapters. Thank you and I love you all! Love, xXTehBlueNaruXx