A/N: just a little drabble about Kurt's early days at Dalton. I know I haven't written much lately but I've been working on an outline for an AU, multichaptered Klaine, Anderberry, fic that I'm going to start writing as soon as exams are over in a month. I'm actually really excited for it! Anyways…I've wanted to write something the lines of this story for a while so I hope everyone likes it!
lessthanthree
Katie
"Done!"
"Done!"
"Wow, that feels good."
"Yeah, it always takes me at least double the time if I do it on my own. Mr. Berg has no concept of reasonable expectations."
"I know. I'm a little terrified for his final."
"Me too, although I've heard people say that his finals are always easier than his assignments, but still."
"I hope they're right."
"Yeah. Well, since we got that finished early, wanna watch a movie or something?"
"Uh, sure, I got a few hours before I have to hit the road."
"Good, now what do you want to watch?"
"Oh, um, I don't know, something new maybe. I feel like I always watch the same things over and over."
"I do the same thing. Um, what about 'Get Real'?"
"Never heard of it."
"Perfect."
"What's it about?"
"A gay kid."
"Oh, ok, that actually sounds really nice. I've never really seen anything about that."
"I know, it's hard to come by and they're always horribly depressing."
"At least they're keeping things realistic."
"Oh come on, I'm not that depressing am I? I mean, I did help you finish the weekly physics assignment in half the time it usually takes, that should count for something."
"Are you actually implying that being good at physics makes a person less depressing? If you are, you should definitely inform Mr. Berg because I don't think he got the memo."
"I think that man needs a lot of memos. Now, movie time. Ok, so don't get your hopes up too high because it isn't that great or anything but you know, it has its moments. Here, let's go sit on the bed, it's more comfy."
"Ok."
Kurt stood up from the corner of the small couch where he had curled up to work on the assignment and quickly packed his books away. He stood a little unsure of himself as Blaine rearranged the pillows so they could sit side-by-side against the head board. As inviting as Blaine's bed looked, pristinely made bedding in Dalton colours and fluffy pillows, complete with the Warbler's childhood teddy bear and the faint but comforting scent of peppermint and sawdust that Kurt had discovered to come from a combination of the boy's hair gel and his cologne, there was still very much a hesitance. He was still getting used to not being detested by other boys never mind being invited to cuddle up in their bed. He had been invited to a few Friday night movie/sleepovers with Blaine and Nick and Jeff but this time he was alone with Blaine, in the privacy of the boy's dorm room, sides pressed together on the single bed. They're legs were outstretched and Blaine's laptop was resting across their thighs, and they're hands resting awkwardly in their laps. This was easily the closest he had ever been with a boy, physically and otherwise.
It was a little overwhelming to say the least. Blaine was always welcoming and charming and tended to be a very physical person which embodied itself in shoulder pats and knee pats and one armed hugs between classes and proper hugs at the end of the day. Kurt still found it hard to relax into Blaine's arms and usually the other boy pulled away before he could. Kurt had just never experienced anything like it before and while one part of his mind that was still frantically searching for the catch, another part would be searching blindly for the reason Kurt even deserved this kindness. It was just hard to simply take friendly contact as it was. It always left him mind racing and his skin tingling and a guilty, awkward feeling in the pit of his stomach for reading too much into everything and taking too much from it and depending too much on it. That wasn't fair to Blaine.
Currently, Kurt was hyper aware of his limbs and where they were touching Blaine's limbs and how there was a constant urge to move and shift which his brain also seemed to be keeping count of. He had moved his outside leg, switching it from lying straight out in front to bending it at the knee with his foot planted flat on the bed, six times in the first ten minutes of the movie. He had moved his arms, crossing them and uncrossing them in new ways, a total of eight times during this period as well. The sound of his own breathing seemed to drown out the dialogue on screen and before he knew it, the movie was half way over and he had no idea what was happening.
"Wanna get some hot chocolate?"
"Umm, sure."
"K, let's go."
As they walked down the immaculately decorated halls to the dorm kitchen, Kurt swore he could feel the distance between them. It was striking how far away Blaine seemed now even though if he extended his arm out he would hit the other boy without even having to stretch. The whole right side of his body seemed cold without the warmth of the other pressed into it. There was a part of him that really wanted Blaine to reach out and wrap his arm him to pull him in close in the way the other boy occasionally did. It wasn't even the part of him that was hopelessly in love with the Warbler because at the end of the day, this wasn't about a silly school boy crush. There was more here. This was about finally feeling human, finally felling worthy of touch and affection. Blaine had been showing him little by little ever since that fateful day on the East wing staircase and although it was still weird at times, still made him do some sort of double take, still made his head spin, it was definitely becoming more and more welcoming. Kurt was finally allowing himself to crave that closeness again after years of shutting it out due to inevitable disappointment.
"So, you enjoying the movie?"
"Uhh, yeah."
"You've been really quite. You're usually full of running commentary. Nick and Jeff have just about kicked you out of movie night on numerous occasions."
"Oh."
"Don't worry, I always vouch for you. Are you ok?"
"Yeah, just a little distracted I guess, sorry."
"By anything in particular?"
"Later."
"Ok."
The kitchen had been flooded some of the younger boys getting sustenance to tide them over for the next few hours of their halo tournament. The two of them quickly finished making their drinks and palmed the hot mugs carefully before making their exit to avoid the inevitable disaster zone that the sugar and adrenaline high teens would create. As it was, they didn't clear the kitchen quite quick enough and a bag off mini marshmallows that someone had thought to be closed was flung in their general direction and ended up raining down on them. Kurt glanced at Blaine in pure shock and light amusement as the other boy shot the culprits a scathing look and before draping his arm around Kurt's shoulder to rid it of the offending ammo but the Warbler ended up leaving his hand there and pulling him close, steering him to safety. The warmth definitely returned to Kurt then, physically and emotionally as they giggled their way back to Blaine's dorm.
"So, penny for your thoughts?"
"It's nothing."
"You said you'd tell me."
"Oh stop pouting."
"I'll stop if you tell me."
"Well, ok, this might sound silly but it's just weird finally getting to hang out with a guy and not have him flinch away or get all uncomfortable. It's kinda nice I guess."
"I know what you mean."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah. Before Dalton I really only had one friend, even my parents didn't really pay me any attention or support. He and I were really close because there was no one else to be close to. I think it kept us both going through the endless days of torment to be able to just sit next to each other and lean into each other and just be in some sort of positive and friendly and compassionate company."
"So you don't think I'm being weird?"
"Not at all. I think that simply getting told no all the time just makes it hard to accept the time you're eventually told yes but when you do, you'll always appreciate it more."
Kurt stared at the other boy in awe for several seconds before smiling gratefully at Blaine, thanking him for his words, his friendship, his everything really. He still had a hard time believing that Blaine was so understanding. That was just Blaine though. He was the complete opposite of every boy he had ever met. It wasn't anything complicated. He wasn't exceptional by any means. He simply carried the same burdens as Kurt. After all, it all came down to a basic human desire for acceptance and affection. It seemed that both had been denied this seemingly primitive and yet extraordinarily powerful form of attention and once they had found someone who was willing to open their arms and hearts to their own desperate soles, they were never letting go.
They sat back against the headboard, hot chocolate in hand, side by side, as close as they could physically get. Kurt felt a little more relaxed next to Blaine now, calmer because of a little reassurance that not only was he not the only one but he was well within his right to want and receive a little friendly compassion. As Blaine pressed play and settled back, Kurt felt the boy's arm return to wrap around his shoulder allowing Kurt to rest his head upon the Warbler's strong shoulder. Eventually Blaine's head came to rest a top his own and Kurt knew, in that moment, that Blaine would never show him anything less than honest affection.
