Disclaimer: In one sense, I own all the Harry Potter books (as, in all likelihood, do you); in another sense, I own none of them.
Author's note: An alternate version of this story, using correct British terminology, can be found as chapter 1 of "The Queen's-English Version" on my backup account, "Bar Sira".
"So how was it, Molly?" said Arthur Weasley, lifting the grocery bag out of his wife's hands. "Did you find everything all right?"
"All except the pumpkin juice," said Molly. "You know how expensive it's gotten lately, so I had to get this instead. I hope Charlie doesn't mind." And she withdrew a green bottle from the bag.
Arthur stared at it for a long moment; then he sighed. "That's it, I'm taking that position at the Ministry tomorrow," he said. "When your wife has to start buying zucchini juice for the children, it's time to get a new job."