A/N: Hey guys, so this is my first fanfiction in a very long time, and my first ever on this site. I hope you'll enjoy it! English is not my native language, therefore i might have made a few mistakes, don't hesitate to point them out.

The story takes place during the movie, after Loki's escape and Bruce's rampage. Even though there will be some Steve/OC story at some point, the story is also focused on the team itself and all the characters. The prologue is here to introduce the OC, the next chapters might not follow her point of vue, I don't know yet. Enjoy your reading, review if you like, it's always nice (and concrit is always appreciated of course). Rated T for some violence, language and probably sexual references later.

Title inspired by Whitman's poem. I don't own the Avengers nor anything from Marvel.

PROLOGUE

"Sorrow found me when I was young
Sorrow waited, sorrow won"

Vega was standing in the shadow of an old building, waiting. The sidewalk was strewn with trash and, above her, the walls were slowly crumbling to dust. The city was sleeping and the empty streets were plunged into darkness. She shivered. The night was cold and she wasn't exactly dressed for such low temperatures. She never really liked Moscow, especially at this time of year, but at least here she could try to convince herself that her shivers were due to the cold, and not to anxiety. She knew that going on a mission so soon after what had happened was a bad idea. She wasn't sure to have the strenght but she couldn't have refused the job, not if she wanted her weaknesses to remain hidden.

It's funny how mistakes have a way of coming back to haunt you, she thought. She smiled sarcastically; the word mistakes was an understatement. She had been told that if you never make mistakes you're not trying hard enough. Mistakes are life lessons, they help you to move forward in life. If only she could say the same about hers.

The sound of a door opening brought her back to reality. Her target, a man in his late fifties, was leaving the building across the street, alone. Vega stood up slowly, trying to ignore the unpleasant feeling in her stomach. How could she concentrate on the present if she was still living in the past, the past she was running away from? As she was heading towards the man she knew she didn't have any choice. It was not the time to give up, not when she'd come so far. It was now or never, and never was not an option. She focused on her target, pulling out her gun, aimed, fired the shot... and missed. One shot, one bullet. It was all she needed to succeed. But not tonight. Tonight it was all she needed to fail. The bullet hit a car door behind the man and shattered the window. The sound of the shot echoed in the night. Vega froze in surprise, she laid her eyes on her right hand still holding the smoking gun. Missing a target could have happened to anyone, but not to her. No, not to her. Everything seemed to be falling appart. It was only when she heard the man fire back at her that she woke up from her delusion. She threw herself onto the ground, and crawled behind a parked car, dodging the bullets. "Get yourself together, Vega", she ordered to herself. She had found shelter behind the car, but she knew it was only a matter of time before he found her. He was getting closer.

Think fast. But her mind was busy playing the last few minutes in her head. She could now hear his footsteps on the other side of the vehicle. She had to act fast, but she was facing a new problem: there was no bullets left in her gun. "Oh you gotta be fucking kidding me", she whispered. One bullet, she had never needed more. Never, until today. She put down the gun and laid on the ground. The man was there, she could see his black boots right in front of her, on the other side of the car. She hold her breath not to give herself away and slid under the vehicle with agility. It was a miracle he hadn't spotted her yet. Grabbing a grip above her, she threw her legs right in his direction, tripping him up. The man let out a surprised gasp before hitting the ground. As fast as she could she pulled herself out and rushed towards him. At this point she wasn't even aiming for the gun he had dropped. She crawled on top of him and started punching him repeatedly the hardest she could. She didn't stop when she felt the warm blood spilling between her fingers; and neither did she when she heard bones breaking. She only stopped when all signs of life had left him, panting and covered in blood. The man was laying on the ground, lifeless, his face unrecognizable, gone in pieces like a porcelain doll. Still shaking, Vega picked up her own gun and started running as fast as her legs could carry her, trying to ignore the tears rolling down her cheeks.

Shattered glass crunched beneath her feet as they engaged in the Helicarrier's bridge. A small aircraft had picked up Vega in Brooklyn earlier this morning, taking her to SHIELD's home base, where she had been welcomed by a troubled Nick Fury. It was such an astonishing spectacle to see the ship in pieces. The confused screams were mixing with the engines' humming noises. Somehow, the clamor left her speechless. She had always pictured the ship as indestructible, but what had happened proved her wrong. Actually, she wasn't exactly sure of what had happened but she had been told that she didn't have to worry, she was safe onboard. A long rumble coming from above her made her doubt she was. She lift up her head to take a look around. This is war, she thought. And it wasn't a war she was ready to fight.

"How bad is it?" She whispered, her eyes lost in the crowd of agents and technicians rushing all around them.

"Oh, it could be worse", Maria Hill, who was walking next to her, answered. "Thanks to Stark we've managed to restart the main engines. We still have to fix some of the front turbines but the ship's an old soul, we should be okay."

Something in Hill's tone didn't seem very convincing but Vega chose to ignore it. Fury was walking ahead of them, skipping through a file, mumbling indistinct words to one of his men. At one point Vega understood he was talking about her and lent an ear to what he was saying. "...It's a complete disaster", he was explaining to the agent next to him. "We have at least 4 eyewitnesses who saw, i quote, 'a lunatic woman attacking a man and tearing his face apart with her bare hands' and the KGB won't back down until we give them explanations. It's my fault, I shouldn't have sent her after what happened in Berlin. And now this", he added, glancing around.

They eventually made their way to Fury's office, not far from the conference room, where Maria Hill and the male agent left on the director's orders. Vega bit her lower lips. She wasn't sure what was going to happen now but she wasn't really impatient to find out. Fury closed the door behind them and headed for his desk.

"Sit" He invited courteously, pointing out to a chair.

"Thanks, but I'll stand" She replied, looking at Fury right in the eye, hands behind her back.

Fury stared at her for a few seconds. "Fine", he finally answered. "Do you know why you're here?"

"I screwed up" She answered. Her tone was distant. It was hard to say whether she felt ashamed or proud of herself. She was hiding behind a stone mask, like she always did, emotionless. "I'm here because I screwed up. Ain't I? I guess you wanted to have the honor of firing me yourself."

Fury shook his head. "Who said anything about you being fired? I can't say it didn't cross my mind at some point but the war has begun, I can't afford to fire you. I need you, I need the skilled agent you used to be. Is it too much to ask?"

Vega opened her mouth in suprise, trying to find the right words. She felt a strange feeling in her heart. She was truly surprised but not relieved, no. Or at least not like she thought she'd be. She was also starting to realize something else. From Fury's office she could still hear the screams of agony made by the damaged ship. "This... this is not an ennemy i'm trained to fight" She finally answered trying to ignore the noises. "I'm not a soldier, sir. I'm an assassin."

"Then I suggest you start practising." Fury said, his unique eye glaring at her. "Killing is all the same, whether it's a man or a demi-god, what you need is just to work out a little more. Besides, you won't be doing it alone. I've put together a special team and you'll be working with them."

That's when she understood. "Oh, so that's it, that's my punishment? She asked on a bitting tone. "You're sending me to goof around with some egocentrics in tights."

"You don't seem to understand my point, here. You don't have any choice." His severe tone cooled her down. It wasn't the kind of tone with which you could bargain. If your mess in Moscow taught me something, it's that I can't trust you to go on the field by yourself. It's either that or you're out, Vega, but you and I both know that outside this, you're nothing, you're just a kid with a dark past and a lot of bitterness. Tell me you can live with that, or take the job.

She had froze. She felt tears of anger filled her eyes. But no matter how much she hated him at this moment, she knew he was right. She didn't have any choice. It was too late for that. "When do I start?" she asked, bitter.

Fury's only eye brightened. She could swear it was in relief. "That's what I thought", he answered. He got up to his feet and headed towards her. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to sound so rough, I'm just getting my job done. Please make sure you do the same" he added, as he was escorting her to the exit door. "And don't worry, you're gonna love those guys."

I highly doubt that, she thought, leaving the room.