Hey. Has it really been six months since the fall of the Black Mage? Time sure passes fast, right?
...
It is really hard to stay optimistic when almost everyone you know is dead or forgotten about you. Do you mind if I tell you my true feelings?
Truth be told, I don't hate you. While I never wanted to look like you or meet a Onyx Dragon, I had always looked up to you. However, I never wanted to be you, it just felt wrong, to take up somebody's place that you know you can never fill the gap no matter how much you tried.
I had to try though... They really wanted you to be back there. Yet, the best they had gotten was me, who was at that point the most innocent, immature and idealistic. I was definitely not suited to the job.
Maybe I am putting myself down too much. After all I had managed to change, right? Changed into their perfect version of you, that is, down the slightest imperfection. And I, myself, was ignored. Oh well, I guess. I always thought our personalities were very close, just not exactly the same.
I am making this about me again, aren't I? Let's... Let's talk about the others, okay?
Well... Mercedes was like a mother figure to me, at least, I think so. Admittedly, I am sure she is tired of me. Always having to defend me.
As for Aran... She definitely makes a good sparring partner if you ever need one. The fact that she is one point five times my height is kind of intimidating, though.
Phantom didn't seem to like me though. Probably he sees too much of his own losses, Aria and you in me. He probably felt that getting a replacement was no better than having nobody.
Luminous is also having an identity crisis on his side as well. He is plagued with the
darkness, despite being the supposed embodiment of light, and is having trouble controlling his dark tendencies, but other than that, he has been a great mentor to me.
Eun Wol... I can't say I have really talked to him much. Personally, I think he is also kind of a loner, always sitting there doing his own stuff.
...? My family? Okay...
My parents are dead, Utah hates me as he believes I killed his parents, and that his little brother is now dead. Really though, I tried telling him That the Evan he knows is still alive, but I don't really have the heart to. I... I changed so much, you know?
Sorry... I have been rambling again. I should find a way to join you. After all, I am still a selfish human, although with no feelings or personality, it is just strange, almost machine like. Nobody would miss me right? I am just an empty shell, a replacement for the lost, an act I am too tired of putting up. Even if I disappeared, the world will still function just fine.
Let's be honest here, you aren't really listening, are you? After all, I am just talking to myself...
A.N. That's it. The end. I am tired of writing. This thing has been sitting in my drafts. And I still dislike how it turned out. It is sudden, but after a year of refining, it is just gone. I guess goodbye to the community too, it has been a great time. I guess I should explain why I chose Evan to write. Personally, I think he has the largest room for character development, as the storyline has him and Freud, however, he is kind of cast aside as a side character recently, which I thought was kind of disappointing. Maybe, I would come back after seeing more character development in the storyline, instead of one confused mess and trying to shoehorn in new characters.