i grew bored in english class and wrote a few drabbly things. i might expand them, or leave them be.
o1.
sometimes romano would part his hair with his fingers in the bathroom when he was alone.
(maybe if he looked a little more sweet, a little more naive, a little more feliciano, people would like him too.)
o2.
and i scream to be heard to be noticed to be hereherehere, and i play pretend that i am okay and that everything is okay and that i might just be okay and i am not that okay because i am not "italy" (feliciano is), and i am just this angry (face) in the crowd of people who matter (more than me).
and sometimes (when i am alone hiding in a bathroom stall) i cry myself until my heart hurts and my eyes hurt and everything hurts and i wait for it to just stop.
(but it never does.)
o3.
i like the way he smiles at me (yes. me.) as if i am everything that is anything and that i am the most important person in his oh so tiny world.
o4.
and he sneaks up to my windowpane on starry summer nights to tap on my window and he tells me he has came to save me from this place called my heart prison where i have stowed myself away.
o5.
romano did not feel all that beautiful when he cried from brown-green-hazel eyes that were usually narrowed rather than closed and burning, but gilbert always said he was pretty(er) when he was not holding anything in (the everything of all the little, petty things).
o6.
the fact is i am a horrible liar, not because i trip over a nervous unsure tongue, but because my heart is too honest with its beating blood to my cheeks and ears and in its pounding whenever he is near.
o7.
gilbert liked the way romano would just invite himself over on those random weekend nights and insist on cooking him "real food" rather than the "disgusting german shit" he "always" ate, and he would curse in whispered rapid italian from the home he has made in the beilschmit kitchen because he would burn his fingers on the saucepan or drop a seasoning (or four).
but he wanted it to be perfect (to hell with childhood afflictions that made him naturally clumsy) and he would work for hours to not-so-secretly be proud when gilbert grinned in that ridiculously overexaggerated way and told him he was his favourite person.
and not-so-discreetly he would climb into the bed with gilbert when he thought the other was asleep (because he was too "tired" to go home) and would snuggle up to him (for the hea(r)t 's warmth) and he would fall asleep and never know that gilbert always had been awake.