BPOV

"You're breaking up with me?"

I sat there stunned as my boyfriend of two years sat across from the restaurant table with an apologetic smile on his face.

Mike Newton was twenty two years old with light blond hair and wire framed glasses that were too large for his too thin face. We had met in high school and been friends for years before he finally got up the courage to ask me out.

I admitted to herself that I wasn't in love with Mike, but he was my friend and I respected him.

"Why?" I couldn't help but ask, even though I was sure I didn't want to hear the answer.

Mike took a sip of his water and sighed.

"Come on, Bella. You knew it was never going to last." He told me gently.

"No, I didn't know that. Mike you haven't said anything to make me think you were unhappy." I argued.

"Bella we stay in every night, we watch TV or read, and it wouldn't be as bad if we were actually staying in for something…." He trailed off suggestively.

"Sex?" I burst out, uncaring that other diners had turned around and were now listening intently. "You're talking about sex?"

"Two years, Bella, I think I've been pretty patient." He sighed. "And then there was, well an incident. "

I frowned. "What incident?"

Mike started to fidget uncomfortably. "I met and woman last week and we…"

"Jesus Christ," I whispered, not needing him to finish, I already knew. "How could you do that to me, Mike? Relationship aside, we've been friends for years." I couldn't hide the hurt that was in my voice or the tears that filled my eyes.

"It was an accident, Bella, a stupid mistake," he rushed out reaching for my hand.

"It was an accident?" I demanded tearing my hand away from his. "How do you accidently have sex with someone, Mike? Excuse me, miss?" I called out to a waitress who was trying to casually walk by so she could pass on the gossip to the other servers.

"Yes? Can I get you anything?"

"Yes, I need a drink. Make it large and heavy on the alcohol."

"Right away," She answered trying to hide a smile.

"Bella, baby, please don't make a scene. You knew this was coming. You don't love me and I don't love you. We both know that."

Yes, I did know that, but it still hurt me to hear him say the words.

"And this woman, this mistake, do you love her?" I asked hollowly.

"No, of course not, but she's more-", he cut off abruptly.

"More what?" I demanded as the waitress placed down my drink.

"She was just, she was-", he stammered.

"Just what?" I interrupted.

"Attractive." He answered. "She was more attractive, okay? She was beautiful and sexy and she had a body a man dreams of. Is that what you wanted me to say?" he demanded.

I looked down at her hands, my short pudgy fingers and felt the lump rise in my throat.

"Unlike me," I whispered. "You broke up with me because of my weight?"

Mike sighed in exasperation. "I didn't say that. Don't put words in my mouth. Don't make me into the bad guy, Bella.."

I felt my temper rising. "Don't make you into one?" I demanded rising to my feet. "You slept with another woman because she was thin and beautiful and because you just damn well wanted to. You are the bad guy, Mike!" I shouted and then, for dramatic effect, threw the drink Id just been given in his face.

"Son of a bitch!" He sputtered.

"We were friends, Mike. No matter what, that should have mattered. I deserve more than this."

I rushed out of the restaurant, trying to ignore the other patrons, some were laughing quietly, while others were applauding me. My cheeks were flushed with anger and embarrassment and my eyes were glassy with unshed tears as I made my to my friends apartment.

Jessica and Lauren had gone to high school with Mike and I and were now sharing an aparment a few blocks from mine. When I had banged on the door in tears, they had ushered me into their apartment and heard all about my tale of woe.

"Son of a bitch," Jessica hissed while Lauren called him ever limp dick prick under the sun.

"Well, you can't let him get to you, Bella." Lauren told me as she applied a coat of vibrant red lipstick in the mirror.

"How can I not? He just dumped me. He slept with someone else and then he dumped me." I cried.

Lauren turned to me with a smile. "We're going to go out and have fun and so that Mike Newton doesn't have the satisfaction of knowing he ruined your night."

I smiled at her. "Thanks Lauren."

"Don't mention it." She waved off.

"This will be so much fun, Bella." Jessica promised.

Two hours later, I wasn't having fun. While Jessica and Lauren had danced the night away, Id been left alone at our table to watch the drinks.

I watched Jessica and Lauren as they danced with the handsome men. I wished I had that confidence. To go up to a guy and ask him to dance. Or even believe that a guy would ask me to. No one had asked me to dance tonight. We had been sitting here, trash talking Mike, when the men had walked up to our table. After a quick conversation, they had asked the girls to dance and Id been left here. Alone.

I smiled when Jessica and Lauren made their way back over.

"Bella, we're going to go back to Tylers place! Will you be okay getting home?" Jessica asked me as she gathered her bag and handed Lauren hers.

I don't know why I had expected an invatation, but I did and it hurt when I didn't get one.

I wanted to tell them that tonight was about us having fun and cheering me up. Instead, I had sat there, alone all night.

But instead of yelling at them, I just smiled and said Id be fine.

I couldn't wait to get home.

I closed the door to my small city apartment and tossed my keys into the small bowl on the kitchen counter.

What a shitty day, I thought as I walked over to the freezer and pulled out a pint of Ben and Jerry's and went in hunt of a spoon.

After eating an entire tub of ice cream and left over Chinese food, I just wanted to crawl into bed and forget everything that had happened tonight.

Once I had changed into my pajamas, I went to brush my teeth before bed, and froze at the sight in the bathroom mirror.

I hated the sight.

Long dark hair, brown eyes and fat.

There was no other word for it, I wasn't overweight or chubby, I was fat.

I had battled with my weight my entire life. I had gone on a diet only to quit a few days down the line and say that Id start again on Monday. I would go clothes shopping and anything I liked would be too small and Id have to settle for something frumpy and that made me look even bigger than I was. Then Id buy fast food to cheer myself up.

My family were supportive, helping me when I was on a diet, not judging me when I quit. They loved me for who I was and always would.

Looking at my reflection I knew that they were the only people who would ever love me for who I was.

It wasn't just Mike, it was my friends, the few I had. Mike was right when he said I would rather stay in with a good book or watch a movie than go out with my friends, but only because I never felt comfortable around them.

Like tonight, Id gone out and been alone all night, while they'd had fun. They were young and beautiful and confident and got any guy they wanted, and did. When I couldn't even hang onto my geek high school boyfriend.

I wiped away the tears that fell down my plump cheeks and looked into my eyes and admitted what I tried so hard to hide.

I wasn't happy.

I hated my life, I hated my job, I hated that whenever I went out, I always felt uncomfortable.

It wasn't supposed to be like this. When I was younger, I had assumed I would lose my weight, work as a hair stylist and be inlove with my Prince Charming. And I would be happy.

I wasnt. I had never lost the weight, but I had gained some. I wasn't working as a hair stylist like Id dreamed, I was a secretary for a law firm and had about one phone call a day. I wasn't inlove with my Prince Charming, Id never met him. Instead, the guy I settled for dumped me. In a restatraunt. How cliche.

I stared at myself for a long time and decided that if I wanted all of that, then I was going to have to get it.

"What do you mean your moving to Harmony, North Carolina?" My mom demanded the next day.

Renee Swan and Charlie Swan are what you would call, free spirited. I was raised to be who I wanted to be and do what I wanted to do. I could stay out late, go on roadtrips with friends. Everyone in my school wanted my parents. And yet, I didn't stay out late or go on roadtrips. Their flower child parenting techniques were wasted on me.

"Harmony?" My dad frowned.

I nodded my head in excitement. "I thought it sounded right. I want to go and get my life in order, why not go to a place with a name like Harmony?" I shrugged.

I had pretty much went online last night and looked up some towns, when Id seen Harmony, North Carolina, I knew it was fate.

"But, why do you want to leave?" My mom asked with tears in her eyes. She may be free spirited, but not when It came to me.

"Because, mom, I have to get my life in order. I've been drifting around, wanting a different life, but never fighting for it. I need to do this mom. Maybe, I could do it here, but I want a whole new start. I've heard good things about this place," I added brightly. "Apparently, some country music star has his own land in the woods." I shrugged. "I don't know if that's true or not, but it sounds interesting." I reached for her hand. "I need to do this."

My mom smiled slowly. "I know you do. I just hope you find whatever your looking for."

"So do I."