"He said I didn't know who he was. That I didn't understand him. He.. looked at me.. straight in the eyes.." Maria trailed off as the tears ran down her face and her voice began to break.
"I'm sure he didn't mean it." I tried to reply with some honesty, although with Michael Guerin, you never knew what he was thinking.
"I can't Liz, its too hard. He knows just how to hurt me, mom warned me, but oh no, I couldn't listen. Why can't I just give up on him?" She looked at me with eyes begging for a real answer.
"Because Maria.. you love him.." That was something that was undeniable. She loved him, I knew in my heart she did.
"But what can I do? Could .. you.. maybe.. ?" She asked as she began to bite her lip.
"Oh no, I'm not going over there.. you know how he acts around me.." I told her, I knew I would end up going over there. But I might as well put up a fight.
"Please.. just this once?"
"Fine. But I'm not staying for long."
"Oh thank you Liz! You know how much I love you!" She said as the happiness began to appear on her face while she wiped away the tears that had stained her face.
----
There he was, in the window starring at god knows what. I took a deep breathe and reached out to knock on his door.
"What do you want?" Michael demanded in his usual angery tone. It wasn't anything I didn't expect from him.
"It's pouring out, do you think you can let me in before you shout at me?"
Michael opens the door, purses his lips then procceds to turn and glare at me.
Trying to stand up to him, and show him that I was serious I took the correct tone. "Why do you do this to her?" I demanded, although I doubted he even knew.
He gave me this look like I had crossed the line already. He was silent for a few seconds, going over this thoughts I assumed. "Because, I dont .. I dont belong here... with her.. She doesn't know me.. what I'm capable of.. what .. " He seemed to be hurt himself, I didn't really expect him to trail off.
"Then why don't you let her know you? You never give her any breaks, you throw everything right in her face Michael. Your killing her. Even you can see that."
He came up to me, and grabbed my hand with such emotion... He starttled me, and I was a little off as to what he wanted. He took my hand and placed it on his heart. "I don't even know if I have one."
I quickly pulled my hand back, he had never touched me like that before. With such passion, with such fury. I looked up at his eyes, looking to get some balance in his cold stare. Those eyes that had kept my reason to not understand Michael for so long were no longer. They were replaced with the most intense and beautiful brown eyes I have ever seen. I felt my knees go weak just looking at them. I was able to push myself onto the couch.
"What is with you Michael? Why are you being like this?"
He looks me straight in the eyes, with the look that I think drove Maria to tears. Heck, I'm about to cry. Those eyes are so pure, it makes you dizzy. No, dizzy isn't right; you get dizzy because looking into his eyes makes you see what he thinks of you. There isn't any way to explain it, and you can't remember what he does think of you. But he makes you .. feel .. like .. I dont know. But I do know that if I continue to look at him, I'm going to get lost, I've gotta get out of here.
"What is with YOU Parker? Why are you here anyways?" Those eyes.. that look.. I could easily see why Maria was so captaviated by him. It was hard not to be.
"What's with me is I cannot stand to see you hurt Maria like that.. like THIS..."
"Hurting her now is going to save her heartbreak later. She's wonderful, but she's not right for me. She doesn't understand who I am. None of you do."
"Let her Michael.. let someone atleast, so you dont feel so cut off.. is that it? You feel different?"
"Newsflash Parker, I AM different." He turns, giving me some relief. He purses his lips again.
I had nothing more to say, I stood up and walked to the door.
"Hey Parker.. " Michael's familiar voice called out.
"What Michael?" What did he want now?
"I .. this is how I am..."
I closed the door and walked out into the rain once again, I'm surprized that it still hadn't let up. I know that was rude to leave Michael there, but I didn't know if I could keep on looking into those eyes and the way they drove me mad. It just drove me completely wild.
Snap out of it Liz, why are you thinking about Michael? He doesn't think about you. You love Max, what are you doing?
I turned around right in the middle of the road. I walked up to his door, and put my arm out to knock.
What the heck am I doing? Michael doesn't care. I'm so stupid. I've got to forget about this, no.. I am forgetting about this.. him.. this moment.. his eyes.. it doesn't matter... it doesn't mean a thing. These were the words that I chose to race through my mind while I turned around once again.
"PARKER?" Michael called out as he ran to me.
Michael didn't call out, I didn't hear him. And if it was real, I will not answer. This is not happening, this is not the Michael Guerin I know. I will not respond.
"Ignore him Liz." I whispered to myself, trying to stay calm.
"You dont have to respond, I just wanted to say that.. well.. you said I should tell someone.. and .. "
The words melted me, they weren't sweet. They were nothing like what Max had told me, but it was that moment when I turned around to face Michael and I saw in his eyes. I saw such a man, such a intriguing man. Full of pain and life .. so passionate and so strong. In that moment I saw the true Michael. And nothing in the world.. nothing in the universe could have stopped me from running to him.
He wrapped his arms around me and he looked down at me, "This isn't the type of sharing I was talking about."
I put my hands on the side of his face and kissed him. It was like lighting up every millimeter of my body. I could feel the electrons vibrating with lust. I have kissed other boys, but this kiss was like none other. I felt myself change on the inside, this was that kiss that ruins every other you have ever and will ever have. It wasn't with Max, it wasn't with Kyle. It was with Michael. The one guy that I had never understood. The guy who had never tried to get to know me, the one guy who had broken my best friends heart.
I looked up at those deep eyes. I knew it would never work out with Michael, we weren't meant to be. But, in that same realization I knew that I would always want to be with him. I shook my head and released him. I ran off into the night, and I know that I will never forget that kiss.
----
Its been one day since that kiss, I cannot get it out of my mind. I went back home, to find Maria sitting on my bed looking off into space. I told her that he does love her and that everything would work itself out. I don't like to lie, but there wasn't anything else to say to her. Today Max called his usual meetings, and Michael was there with those cold eyes and neither of us said a word to each other. The worse thing about it is, that I don't think it meant anything to him, but thats Michael for you. I'll just have to forget about it, because it doesn't mean a thing in this lifetime. There will never be a Liz Guerin, there will never be a Liz and a Michael. Besides, it was only one kiss. Or was it?
"I'm sure he didn't mean it." I tried to reply with some honesty, although with Michael Guerin, you never knew what he was thinking.
"I can't Liz, its too hard. He knows just how to hurt me, mom warned me, but oh no, I couldn't listen. Why can't I just give up on him?" She looked at me with eyes begging for a real answer.
"Because Maria.. you love him.." That was something that was undeniable. She loved him, I knew in my heart she did.
"But what can I do? Could .. you.. maybe.. ?" She asked as she began to bite her lip.
"Oh no, I'm not going over there.. you know how he acts around me.." I told her, I knew I would end up going over there. But I might as well put up a fight.
"Please.. just this once?"
"Fine. But I'm not staying for long."
"Oh thank you Liz! You know how much I love you!" She said as the happiness began to appear on her face while she wiped away the tears that had stained her face.
----
There he was, in the window starring at god knows what. I took a deep breathe and reached out to knock on his door.
"What do you want?" Michael demanded in his usual angery tone. It wasn't anything I didn't expect from him.
"It's pouring out, do you think you can let me in before you shout at me?"
Michael opens the door, purses his lips then procceds to turn and glare at me.
Trying to stand up to him, and show him that I was serious I took the correct tone. "Why do you do this to her?" I demanded, although I doubted he even knew.
He gave me this look like I had crossed the line already. He was silent for a few seconds, going over this thoughts I assumed. "Because, I dont .. I dont belong here... with her.. She doesn't know me.. what I'm capable of.. what .. " He seemed to be hurt himself, I didn't really expect him to trail off.
"Then why don't you let her know you? You never give her any breaks, you throw everything right in her face Michael. Your killing her. Even you can see that."
He came up to me, and grabbed my hand with such emotion... He starttled me, and I was a little off as to what he wanted. He took my hand and placed it on his heart. "I don't even know if I have one."
I quickly pulled my hand back, he had never touched me like that before. With such passion, with such fury. I looked up at his eyes, looking to get some balance in his cold stare. Those eyes that had kept my reason to not understand Michael for so long were no longer. They were replaced with the most intense and beautiful brown eyes I have ever seen. I felt my knees go weak just looking at them. I was able to push myself onto the couch.
"What is with you Michael? Why are you being like this?"
He looks me straight in the eyes, with the look that I think drove Maria to tears. Heck, I'm about to cry. Those eyes are so pure, it makes you dizzy. No, dizzy isn't right; you get dizzy because looking into his eyes makes you see what he thinks of you. There isn't any way to explain it, and you can't remember what he does think of you. But he makes you .. feel .. like .. I dont know. But I do know that if I continue to look at him, I'm going to get lost, I've gotta get out of here.
"What is with YOU Parker? Why are you here anyways?" Those eyes.. that look.. I could easily see why Maria was so captaviated by him. It was hard not to be.
"What's with me is I cannot stand to see you hurt Maria like that.. like THIS..."
"Hurting her now is going to save her heartbreak later. She's wonderful, but she's not right for me. She doesn't understand who I am. None of you do."
"Let her Michael.. let someone atleast, so you dont feel so cut off.. is that it? You feel different?"
"Newsflash Parker, I AM different." He turns, giving me some relief. He purses his lips again.
I had nothing more to say, I stood up and walked to the door.
"Hey Parker.. " Michael's familiar voice called out.
"What Michael?" What did he want now?
"I .. this is how I am..."
I closed the door and walked out into the rain once again, I'm surprized that it still hadn't let up. I know that was rude to leave Michael there, but I didn't know if I could keep on looking into those eyes and the way they drove me mad. It just drove me completely wild.
Snap out of it Liz, why are you thinking about Michael? He doesn't think about you. You love Max, what are you doing?
I turned around right in the middle of the road. I walked up to his door, and put my arm out to knock.
What the heck am I doing? Michael doesn't care. I'm so stupid. I've got to forget about this, no.. I am forgetting about this.. him.. this moment.. his eyes.. it doesn't matter... it doesn't mean a thing. These were the words that I chose to race through my mind while I turned around once again.
"PARKER?" Michael called out as he ran to me.
Michael didn't call out, I didn't hear him. And if it was real, I will not answer. This is not happening, this is not the Michael Guerin I know. I will not respond.
"Ignore him Liz." I whispered to myself, trying to stay calm.
"You dont have to respond, I just wanted to say that.. well.. you said I should tell someone.. and .. "
The words melted me, they weren't sweet. They were nothing like what Max had told me, but it was that moment when I turned around to face Michael and I saw in his eyes. I saw such a man, such a intriguing man. Full of pain and life .. so passionate and so strong. In that moment I saw the true Michael. And nothing in the world.. nothing in the universe could have stopped me from running to him.
He wrapped his arms around me and he looked down at me, "This isn't the type of sharing I was talking about."
I put my hands on the side of his face and kissed him. It was like lighting up every millimeter of my body. I could feel the electrons vibrating with lust. I have kissed other boys, but this kiss was like none other. I felt myself change on the inside, this was that kiss that ruins every other you have ever and will ever have. It wasn't with Max, it wasn't with Kyle. It was with Michael. The one guy that I had never understood. The guy who had never tried to get to know me, the one guy who had broken my best friends heart.
I looked up at those deep eyes. I knew it would never work out with Michael, we weren't meant to be. But, in that same realization I knew that I would always want to be with him. I shook my head and released him. I ran off into the night, and I know that I will never forget that kiss.
----
Its been one day since that kiss, I cannot get it out of my mind. I went back home, to find Maria sitting on my bed looking off into space. I told her that he does love her and that everything would work itself out. I don't like to lie, but there wasn't anything else to say to her. Today Max called his usual meetings, and Michael was there with those cold eyes and neither of us said a word to each other. The worse thing about it is, that I don't think it meant anything to him, but thats Michael for you. I'll just have to forget about it, because it doesn't mean a thing in this lifetime. There will never be a Liz Guerin, there will never be a Liz and a Michael. Besides, it was only one kiss. Or was it?