Sky: This is just a stupid idea I had and turned into a short and silly story
House: Ain't that the truth. On a side note, why are all your stories all pitted against me!?
Sky: Because torturing you is all kinds of fun.
House: Hahahahaha, you're funny. Now, she doesn't own me, or Cuddy.
Sky: YEAH! And remember to review! Oh, and remember, this one reads: Cuddy, House, Cuddy, House, Cuddy and onwards. Speaking of which…ONWARDS!
You And Your Stalker Ways
"HOUSE! What are you doing out here!?"
He pops out from behind one of the bushes. "Would you believe me if I said I was trimming your hedges?"
"No."
He shrugs. "Then I don't know what to tell you."
"How about why you're here?"
"Defense. I'm defending you."
"What..!?"
"Wilson."
"Wilson what?"
"He sent me here. That's why I'm here. Wilson."
She sighs heavily. "Why did that idiot send you here?"
"This some sort of interrogation?"
"You're outside hiding in my bushes. I think that merits some questions."
"This is America. So… no it doesn't."
"House you have three seconds to tell me why you're here or I'm gonna go Sarah Palin on your ass."
"Does that mean you think I'm Russian!?"
"…House…"
"Well aren't we a basket of joy."
"I'm going to bed, House. Go home. Stop stalking me."
"I told you, I was trimming your hedges…"
"And then you said Wilson sent you."
"Exactly…Wilson sent me to…trim your hedges."
"What?"
"I really don't know, Cuddy."
"Go home, House." She closes the door in his face.
"G'night, Cuddles."
15 Minutes Later….
Someone knocks on the door. Meaning House.
"HOUSE! If my this place isn't on fire…"
"Maybe I am on fire!"
"Wha…That makes no sense."
"You said your House was on fire…"
"…."
A shrug. "Your words, Cuddles. I can't make this stuff up."
"House, why are you still here?"
"Because Wilson sent me here. I told you that."
"Why, House? Why did Wilson send you here? Please just tell me so I can go back to sleep."
"I can't tell you."
"So you came here to tell me something you couldn't tell me?"
He pauses to think. Then nods jerkily. "Yeah."
"Why can't you tell me, House?"
Angry. "Nevermind. Let's just assume I came over here to cut your hedges."
"I get the feeling this isn't going to be the last time you knock on my door."
"You're probably right."
"So I 'm just gonna go make some tea while you make up your mind."
"That's probably for the best."
20 More Minutes Later…Another knock on the door…
"Oh good, I was starting to get worried that you'd run off…."
"Nice, Cuddy."
"Sorry, I know you're having problems. Are you ready to tell me yet?"
"…."
"…."
"…."
"Ugh. House, it's been almost forty minutes. And its three in the morning. Out with it!"
"Don't rush me, Cuddy…"
"House, I'm so tired…."
"Fine. Alright. I'm ready."
"Thank god!"
"I came here to ask you out."
"….!?"
"But then I changed my mind."
She frowns. "So…let me get this straight. You came over here, waited 35 minutes, all to not ask me out?"
"That sounds about right."
"Goodnight, House." She slams the door shut.
He smiles to himself and walks away, "G'night Cuddles!"