A Sick Avenger

By: Velveteen Dreamer

Pairing:

Uchiha Sasuke, 17

Haruno Sakura, 17

Genre:

Humor

Romance

Note:

Dedicated to Patrick, my cuz. Please forgive any of the errors that I must have committed. Thank you…! Do enjoy!


Chapter One:

Typhoon in Konoha

.:..:.

Team 7 has just come back from the Sand Village after retrieving a scroll from the Kazekage. It was about six in the evening, and they were all tired. Upon arriving at the gates, their blonde comrade suddenly collapsed. Kakashi offered to take him home.

Their ex-sensei and teammate turned into alley, leaving Sakura with her poker-faced companion. It was no problem at all, because:

1) Their homes were just 3 blocks apart,

2) And since their homes were still a 10-minute walk away, at least she had company.

During the first two minutes, a thick silence engulfed them. They just walked casually, as if they were strangers. Sakura was getting pissed. She wanted to break the silence, but before she could do so, it began to rain.

"Aww man," she cried. She looked up at the sky and saw these huge nimbus clouds. Lightning flash and she cringed. The deafening sound of thunder followed and she jumped in shock. Before she could shriek, a hand took hold of hers and pulled.

"Sa-Sasuke?"

He pulled her in the nearest shade he saw. Ichiraku, the ramen shop. It was closed, but at least it still had a shade.

Sakura noticed Sasuke's hand on her own. It was cold. As cold as ice. As cold as his attitude. As cold as his onyx eyes.

It seems that Sasuke caught her staring at their intertwined fingers. He let go immediately. Sakura saw him clench his fists. And was that a small tinge of pink on his cheeks? OMG. Was the cold-hearted Uchiha blushing?

She felt the blood rush into her face too. She covered her face with her shivering, clammy hands. When it thundered again, she whimpered. Out of the blue, Sasuke took hold of her waist and roughly put her on his shoulders. He leaped onto the rooftops making sure that she feels comfortable.

"Sasuke, put me down," she said. She pounded her arms on his back, and stopped when she saw red. She lifted his garments and saw a humongous laceration on his back. It was as deep as an inch and she gasped at the sight of blood seeping from it.

"Sasuke, you're hurt! What the hell?! Why didn't you tell me?!" she screamed. Sasuke smirked inwardly. "You have no right to know," he retorted quietly. Sakura was on the verge of crying. "Put me down, you bastard! People are just trying to help here, y'know!"

Sasuke leapt even faster, and after a few seconds he put the pink-haired kunoichi down. Sakura looked around and realized that she was on her own doorstep. She looked at the dark-haired beside her who winced in pain.

"Damn you, Uchiha!"

"A simple thanks would suffice," he said coldly.

"Thanks?! Why the hell would I be grateful to an insensitive jerk like you?!"

"Shut up."

Sakura looked at him murderously. She took his hand and gazed straight into his lonely eyes. "You are coming with me this instant, Uchiha!"

He glared at her.

"No."

A vein popped at the medic-nin's head.

"You stubborn ass, you! Don't you know that your recklessly tended wound is bleeding the HELL out of you, huh?!"

"I don't need your help," he replied.

Suddenly, he sneezed. Sakura looked a tad amused. She put her hand on his wet forehead and smirked.

"Well, well, well! What have we got here? An Uchiha with a cold, a fever and A GODDAMN WOUND! That's it buster! You are coming with me!"

She pulled him with all her might. Sasuke cursed inwardly. 'Screw her freaky strength…'

Once they were inside, Sakura bolted all the locks on her door. She slammed the injured Uchiha on her bed and got her medical stuff.

"Sasuke, turn around."

"Hn."

"Turn around so I can heal your goddamn wound, you Prick!"

"Hn."

Sasuke obliged and turned. Sakura gazed on the deep injury. It was even worse than she thought it would be. She put her hands on it and green chakra flowed from them. She felt Sasuke flinch in pain as she pressed her hands on his back.

"This will be done in a few seconds' time, Uchiha."

She got no reply.

After healing his wound, Sakura stared at him. He was breathing heavily, and he coughed like mad.

"Stay here, Uchiha. I'll get some cou…"

She didn't get a chance to finish her sentence as said boy's hand covered her mouth. He threw a kunai at the direction of the open window. Both of them heard a shriek and a loud THUD. Sakura broke free of Sasuke's grip and looked below her window. She saw…

"Jiraiya?! What the hell?! Is that… A telescope?!"

She was about to thank Sasuke when she noticed that he was gone.

"Damn that Uchiha!"

She rushed to the hallway and saw a familiar chicken-ass haired guy in her dining table. She stomped up to him and noticed that he was drinking tea.

"And where did you get the idea that you could drink MY tea?!"

She got no reply. Instead, she saw him push another cup in her direction, filled with hot, ginseng tea.

She took the cup and eyed the man before her carefully.

"Thanks," she said.

"Hn."

Before anything else, she ran to the cupboard and placed a cough syrup bottle and a teaspoon in front of Sasuke.

"Drink," she uttered.

Sasuke looked at her coolly and opened the bottle. He poured some on the teaspoon and he drank it. He then gave her a look that said Are-you-happy-now?!

Before Sakura could mutter yes, before anything else happened, Sasuke fell into unconsciousness.

"Uchiha?" she said. She thought that he was joking but when she poked him in the shoulders, she got no response at all.

"Ohmigod! Sasuke!!"

She carried him all the way to her bedroom, and carefully laid him on the bed. She checked his breathing. It was shallow. His pulse was still okay. She looked at him. He looks like an angel when he's unconscious.

After a few minutes, his breathing returned to normal she figured that he was now in deep slumber so she sighed in relief.

Then, it HIT her.

If Sasuke was in the ONLY bed in the house, then where was she supposed to sleep?!

She then remembered that a futon was hidden somewhere in the attic. She stood up and made her way to the door when she heard a loud FZZZT. All the lights turned off.

"EEEKKK!!"

Great. A blackout. How was she supposed to go there?!

Suddenly, she heard a creak in the hallway. She shivered. Then it thundered once again. She didn't take time to think anymore, she just jumped into her bed and hid under the covers.

She got even more scared when the wind blew hard outside, the branches of a tall tree scratching her window.

"Great. Just my luck."

She didn't move for a full ten minutes.

She moved her hand, hoping to grasp Sasuke's. Her eyes widened when she felt that no one was beside her anymore.

"Sasuke-kun?"

BOOM!

The thunder crackled its loudest as Sakura shrieked HER loudest.

Suddenly, she felt a hand creeping up her shoulder. She shivered like crazy.

She could hear breathing beside her left ear.

She was getting freaked out already.

"Boo," the voice said.

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!"

She then felt arms snaking around her waist.

"Relax, Sakura-chan. It's me."

"Sasuke!!"

She wanted to give him a knuckle sandwich but remembered that he said Sakura-chan.

Sasuke would never say that to anyone!

"Hey, is your room really THIS hot, or is it just you?"

Did she just hear that correctly?! The great Uchiha saying a cheesy pick-up line?!

"Sasuke, are you alright?"

"Of course I am, babe."

BABE?! She scoffed.

Suddenly, she felt something warm on her lips. OMG. Now he was kissing her?! Was Sasuke on drugs?!

She couldn't resist it so she gave in. After their sizzling make-out session, Sakura clasped her hand on her mouth.

"Uchiha, you bastard! Why did you kiss me?! Now, I'M going to have a COLD!"

She saw Sasuke smirk under the moon light.

"Then that's better. You could keep me company in THE BED."

"What the hell?!"

Sasuke then wobbled as he tried to stand up. He locked the door and waddled back to the bed. Then he took Sakura's hand.

"Sakura-chan, help me rebuild the clan," he said earnestly.

Sakura bit her lip. Sasuke was PROPOSING to her?!

Her inner self screamed in delight. She managed to mutter a small yes before snuggling up to his chest. She had never been this happy before!

.:..:.

Sakura woke up due to the sunlight that came through her window. She had the most amazing night with Sasuke. She stood up and grabbed a robe in her closet. She tiptoed out of the room, careful not to wake up her fiancé.

She went to the kitchen, daydreaming about their wedding. Everything was going so well until she saw the cough syrup bottle.

She noticed the expiry date.

Expiry Date: January 7

Warning: Drinking beyond expiry date can cause dizziness, drunkenness and unconsciousness. May also put person on CRACK.

Sakura looked at the calendar. Her mouth nearly dropped to the floor when she saw that it was already January 17.

Damn.

So much for being happy.

.:..:.

In the bedroom, Sasuke noticed that he wasn't wearing anything at all. His head throbbed as he sat up. Did anything happen to him? All he remembered was that after a few minutes when he drank the medicine, everything blacked out.

He froze when he saw Sakura's underwear on the floor, beside his own underwear.

"HOLY SHIT!!"

.:..:.

Sakura rushed to her bedroom, frantically thinking up for an excuse. She had heard Sasuke curse loudly, and he rarely does that at all.

She opened the door and walked in to find an Uchiha on the bed, his eyes frozen on the scattered underwear on the floor. Sakura froze too.

"OMG," she cried out.

Suddenly, she felt Sasuke's gaze on her. She looked up and saw a pair of deep, ebony eyes glaring at her.

"Sa-Sasuke, I c-can explain ev-everything!"

"Sakura, did we just…?!"

"Yeah."

"Last night?!"

"Um, yes."

"And you..?!"

"No! It wasn't me! I accidentally gave you a bottle of medicine that had expired! And you experienced those side effects! Believe me, I didn't know! I just saw this morning!"

Sasuke stared wide-eyed at her. Then he smirked.

"You wanna go for another round, Uchiha Sakura?"

Sakura froze in disbelief.

"What?!"

But deep inside, Sakura's happiness was slowly returning.


.:..:.

After a few weeks, Sakura was officially pregnant.

.:..:.

After three months, Sakura was officially an Uchiha.

.:..:.

After six months, Sakura was officially a mother.

.:..:.

Certainly a happy ending was it not?


.:..:.

Hope you liked that! Reviews would be greatly appreciated!

PPPLLLEEEAAASSSEEE??

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