Disclaimer: I only own the idea for this story. The song is by Texas and the characters are JKR's.
Some of you may have read this story before, or heard it presented in the first round of fan fiction readings at Prophecy 2007 in Toronto, ON. I originally wrote it in 2005. Written in UK English/spelling as much as possible, so please do not send me reviews telling me I spelled things like "honour" and "defence" wrong. This was spell-checked in Word with the UK English Dictionary. Thank you. :-)
I thought this story was on this site, but apparently I only shared it other places. Oops. Better late than never?
I know it's been nearly 7 years, but if you have photos or videos of my reading at Prophecy, would you please share? I don't have any of that night.
The music video for this song shows the leader singer of Texas, Sharleen Spiteri, dancing a lovely tango with Alan Rickman. To see a video of this, go here (remove spaces):
youtu. be/ X4-gNN8WRHo
Hermione Granger was a powerful witch by anyone's standards. Even the Ministry had grudgingly admitted as much when Albus Dumbledore revealed that it had been her cunning combination of charms, potions, and transfiguration that had given Harry the boost he needed to take down Voldemort.
She had seemingly vanished after the Last Battle, although there were reports here and there regarding her obvious existence, carefully and prudently written by the well-chastised Rita Skeeter.
Her closest friends did not seem to know her exact whereabouts and if they were aware of the circumstances of her abrupt departure from the United Kingdom, they were keeping it to themselves and at least acting the part of the woebegone best friends.
Harry and Ron had gotten on with their lives, both happily married now that the remaining Death Eaters had been kissed. Fans of the Golden Trio speculated on if the boys - men - were truly happy given that neither of them had wed the elusive Miss Granger who had grown into quite a lovely woman.
If they were upset, it simply did not show.
It certainly did not show on the face of the one person who perhaps missed her more than anyone else in the Wizarding World. Someone who did not view her as a best friend or an unofficially adopted sister.
A large falcon swooped down to meet him one day, and he unravelled the parchment carefully after testing it for hexes; old habits die-hard. He offered it a treat and directed it to the owlery for some well deserved rest, as it appeared to have flown a trans-Atlantic flight non-stop to reach him.
It was a letter, he supposed, although sections of it read like a poem or song perhaps, as it seemed to him that he had heard the words sung before . . . although he could not place his finger on the memory to be sure.
My dear friend,
Who would have thought we would have become friends when there was so much animosity between us during my time as a student? Nevertheless, I am glad for the honour of having someone such as you as a friend and confidant. Was there something more between us? As we learned mutual respect and came to see each other for more than there was in our pasts, I sometimes thought I saw the faint glimmer of . . .perhaps not love, but caring at least flicker in your eye. Though at times I believed it was love; I would like to think it was in any case.
And then after the war and I became so "popular" - how I detest that word - with the Ministry of Magic and the UK Wizarding World in general . . . and how circumstances prevented your aide in the defeat of Voldemort from being known . . . it seems as if you turned on me, whether out of pure malice or as a self-defence mechanism from once again being denied honour that you deserved far more than myself . . . I suppose I will never know the truth.
I regret that the friendship and burgeoning affection that we had developed could be wiped out so quickly by that turn of events. Perhaps you believed that I enjoyed the popularity, as you always believed of Harry; in truth, both of us hated it and still hate it. Here I am only known in vague references. They know I was instrumental in bringing down a dark wizard, but not enough to treat me like anything but a normal person, which is what I prefer. It is very relaxing.
I was listening to the Wizarding Wireless Network the other day, which thankfully broadcasts songs from the UK as well, and heard a song that I fell in love with a long time ago but had not, thought of in sometime. I thought long and hard before I sent you this; I do not want to hurt you, and there probably is not anyway to do this that will not be painful for one or both of us. It hurts me to hurt you; particularly since I loved you and some part of me still does.
When we were together I was blown away
Just like paper from a fan
But you would act like I was just a kid
Like we were never gonna last
I am sure you know that when I first got to know you, I found you rather intimidating. Everything about you just screamed for respect and the full attention of your colleagues, and frankly, any living being around you. You had so much more experience than I did and I often felt like I was a little girl again, back in my first year of Hogwarts, instead of a graduate of Hogwarts and well versed in war. We all grew up before we should have, but what choice did we have? I hoped for more between us but I felt like you did not think we had a future beyond friendship.
Now I've got someone who cares for me
He wrote my name in silver sands
I think you know you've lost the love of your life
And you said, I was the best you've ever had
About a year after I left, a wizard contacted me. Someone whom, if I was true to myself, had cared about for a long time, and had respected deeply. I never would have imagined he felt the same way. Then I received your letter, telling me how much you missed me and how much I meant to you; but I had found the other half my soul and I could not tear myself from him.
Because I'm in demand
You're thinking of the way you should have held my hand
And all the times you said you didn't understand
You never had our love written in your plans
But now I'm in demand
And I think you got wind of my bonding for it seemed the less available I was, the more you wanted me; the more you thought about what we could have been together, what we could have done together.
Don't ever think you saw the best in me
There's a side you'll never know
Cos love and loving are two different things
Set your sites far too low
My soul mate has known me longer than you have, and he knows all my bad sides and all my good sides. There are parts of me you will never know; never could know. You saw me work, you loved what I did academically; how prepared I was, but you never saw me hurt, you never saw me in joy with my friends or in chastisement when we got into yet another scrape of some sort. But . . .
Now I've got someone who cares for me
He wrote my name in silver sands
I think you know you've lost the love of your life
And you said, I was the best you've ever had
It's only when I fall asleep
I see that winning smile
When my dreams just move along
You've lost the race by miles . .
You had a great smile. One I bet few ever saw; not the smile you showed the side of the dark, but when you were truly happy about something; when we made great breakthroughs in our research, your smile lit up your face, brought out your 'poor, tired' soul - as you used to say. I see that smile when I sleep and dream of what we had.
However, I have true love now, and I am sorry for what we lost; am sorry for any hurt I may cause you with my letter, but I know you had started hearing things about the turn my life had taken and I felt it was best that you heard everything directly from me instead of through rumours.
I will always think fondly of you and wish you the best in life. I hope you find someone whom you can love and who will love you equally in return. The heart looks beyond all outside appearances.
Sincerely,
Hermione Snape
"Mad-Eye" Moody wiped the tears from under his one good eye, careful not to let any tears drop on the parchment he had received from Hermione. He would treasure it always, along with the good times they had shared under their budding friendship. He was glad he had never gotten to know her intimately for he was sure he would just miss the lovely lass that much more.
He hoped Severus realized just how lucky he was, but by the sound of it, he did. "Never would have known he had it in him," Moody said gruffly. He wondered if her childhood friends knew. It was likely they did; he had trained constant vigilance into them and they seemed to know things before anyone else did; even Albus.
He was likely the last to know, but at least he had had written word from Hermione herself and had not heard gossipy rumours from anyone else first; just titbits here and there; hints that she was no longer single.
With a heartfelt sigh, Moody wiped his face, tucked the letter into a magically protected pocket in his robes, and stood, surveying the people around him. The war was over, the Death Eaters all captured and kissed; he could take a day off if he needed to.
He slipped quietly out the door before anyone noticed, and made his way home.
Would love to hear your thoughts! Thank you for reading!