Edward was on his way to his mother's boutique to drive her from work to home. It was called "Elizabeth's Square," where she liked to have things available for every woman, no matter what size or stature. He usually wouldn't have to pick his mother up, but his younger sister, Alice, who worked with their mother at the boutique, was out somewhere with her boyfriend of three months, Jasper. Edward shook his head in contempt, not understanding how Alice could blow their mother off for her boyfriend.
Well, if you had a girlfriend, you would understand.
The thought came out of nowhere, but Edward merely shrugged it off. He knew that he was better off without a girlfriend, as they only brought him trouble. His last girlfriend maxed out his credit card before she dumped him and ran off with an old friend from high school. Edward was disgusted as he thought of her, so he pushed the thoughts as far out of his head as he could. The one girl he did want to be his girlfriend saw him as nothing more than a friend, if they were even that.
Edward had just gotten out of his car, and onto the sidewalk, when he bumped into a small frame. The girl tumbled, and Edward, being the gentleman he was, stretched out his hand to help her stand. The girl wore an angry expression and slapped his hand away. "Don't touch me!" were the only words that came out from her mouth. Edward looked around frantically, not wanting anyone to think that he was purposely trying to harm a young girl. When he saw that no one was watching them, he breathed a small sigh of relief.
"My apologies," Edward rushed out. "I didn't see you there."
The girl screeched, thinking that Edward had just insulted her due to her height. She was very sensitive about the subject and immediately disliked anyone who brought up how small she was. The girl was beginning to give Edward a headache, so he picked her up against her will and placed her back on her feet. Without a word, Edward stepped around her and made his way to his mother's shop. Not a minute had passed by when Edward heard giggling. He immediately looked to the girl, but she was now crossing the street to her parked car. Edward looked around until he found the source of the giggling, and when he found it, his breath caught. He couldn't believe his eyes. The one girl that he had always dreamed of stood a few feet from him.
When he finally found his voice, it was breathy, as if he had just finished running a marathon. "Bella," he said, and her giggle formed into a small smile.
"Hey there, Eddie," she said in response.
Edward's eye twitched at the nickname they both knew he hated. Instead of getting upset, Edward merely smirked and called her "Belly," and by the drop of her smile, he knew he had gotten her. "I guess we're even," he said with a smile of his own. Bella nodded and her smile returned, causing Edward's heart to skip a beat. Edward checked his watch and realized that he had five minutes to get to his mother before she started calling his phone. Though Edward wanted to stay and chat with Bella, he knew he had a duty to his mother above all else. With a sad smile, Edward told Bella he had to go, and she nodded in understanding. With a small wave, and a slight nod of his head, Edward turned and stalked off to Elizabeth's Square.
Edward's mind was focused intently on Bella when he arrived at the boutique. He wondered how she was and if she had a boyfriend—or even worse, a husband. Edward had always wanted to be the one for Bella, but he knew that he was not her type at all. Bella didn't even know how Edward felt about her. All throughout high school, Edward and Bella had been best friends and told each other everything. They always looked for each other's approval when it came to their relationships. Bella never approved of the girls Edward dated—they were all either fake or held no loyalty to Edward at all. Edward never approved of the guys Bella dated—none of them was him.
Edward greeted his mother politely with a kiss on her cheek and a one-armed hug. Edward and Elizabeth smiled warmly at each other, and they made their way out of the shop. The walk back to Edward's car was silent. Occasionally, Edward sneaked glances around, wondering if he would see Bella again. Elizabeth's thoughts focused on the worry she had for her youngest son not having someone to dote on and love.
About five minutes into the ride home, Elizabeth finally spoke. "Edward, dear," she said charmingly. His head moved slightly to her as an indication that he was listening to her. She smiled and continued. "Let us go out for lunch, just us two. We haven't had a chance to bond in a while." Edward chuckled at his mother's request, having just had lunch with her last week. Even so, he acquiesced and turned the car around, heading in the direction of their favorite restaurant.
When they arrived, Edward parked in what he had recently dubbed his "usual spot" and went to open the passenger side door for his mother. Elizabeth thanked him kindly, and the two walked with arms linked into Bella Italia. The hostess smiled brightly at the two once they were fully inside and greeted them sincerely. In less than two minutes, Elizabeth and Edward were seated at the usual booth, and the waiter noted that their antipasti were on the way. Elizabeth smiled kindly at the waiter and gave him a small, though polite, nod. Edward and Elizabeth loved the restaurant; Elizabeth more so. It made them feel as if they were actually in Italy.
Elizabeth waited until the antipasti arrived before she started a conversation. After Elizabeth and Edward had waited for five minutes, the waiter arrived with two plates of Bruschetta. They took small bites as they ate, and after finishing the appetizer, Elizabeth begun speaking. "Edward," she started clearly. He looked up at her and wiped the sides of his mouth with a napkin. "You know I worry about you. You're lonely, yet you refuse to find yourself a girlfriend. Why?"
The concern was clear in Elizabeth's voice. Though Edward hated to disappoint his mother, he knew that there was no possibility of him bringing a girl home. If he was being truthful with himself, he was simply too shy. His past girlfriends had either forced themselves in his company, or his mother had set them up. Edward's voice was despondent when he spoke. "Mother, I'm just not interested in being in a relationship. It's perfectly normal."
Elizabeth was about to speak but was interrupted when the main course was brought to the table. After the antipasti were removed, Chicken Marsala—without mushrooms—was placed in front of Elizabeth, and Cioppino was placed in front of Edward. The drinks were placed next, and the two smiled thankfully at the waiter. "Grazie," they called out in unison. With a nod of his head, and a polite "Prego," the waiter left Edward and Elizabeth alone once more.
The conversation was momentarily forgotten, and the two began eating once again. Edward was glad for the interruption, not wanting to have his lack of a love life as the topic for the whole meal. Elizabeth's thoughts focused on ways that she could approach the subject for a second time. Unable to come up with an idea that would keep her son speaking, Elizabeth decided to wait until after the meal was fully over, and she would re-start the discussion on their way back home.
After he paid for the meal, Edward tipped the waiter and then pulled his mother's seat out for her. Elizabeth smiled brightly at her son, reveling in the fact that she had raised a gentleman. It was for this reason that Elizabeth could not understand why her son did not have someone to love him.
Edward and Elizabeth left the restaurant the way they came, and they smiled at the hostess as they left. Edward open the passenger door for his mother once they reached the car and waited until she comfortably sat inside before closing it. Edward made his way to the driver side in a swift movement, and he made sure to check his surroundings before taking off toward home.
The ride back was fifteen minutes instead of the usual twenty, but that was all Elizabeth needed to get her son to talk. About two minutes in, Elizabeth started where she left off in the conversation the two had started in the restaurant. "Edward, it is not 'perfectly normal' to not be interested in a relationship. There has to be some reason."
Edward's head throbbed in irritation. He did not want to argue with his mother, and he did not want to bring up Bella either. Edward was simply embarrassed. He didn't want his family to find out that he was still stuck on Bella. She was like a ghost after all. No matter how close she and Edward had gotten, he could never touch her when he reached out. Edward exhaled slowly, hoping that doing so would calm him. He wanted to be able to just go on without the memory of Bella plaguing his thoughts forever. He wanted to be clear of this struggle, and he felt the best way to start was by not speaking of her. Edward's thoughts began warring with each other, trying to force one another down. It was simply a battle of mind and heart—life and love. Edward knew his life would be better off without loving someone he could not have, but there was also a small glimmer of hope that he held, wanting so much for Bella to recognize and return his feelings.
Elizabeth watched her son war with himself, and as she realized he would not answer her question, she cleared her throat, bringing Edward's attention back to her. "Mother," he muttered. "I just don't feel the need to be in a relationship." That was what he decided he would make himself believe. If he could accomplish this, he would no longer have to try so hard to get others to believe it as well. Edward hoped that his mother would just take the bait and let it go.
Elizabeth watched her son for a moment, and then sighed. "All right, Edward. We can do this your way. But be sure, when you do meet a girl, I want to be the first to know." Edward nodded at his mother's request, though he knew that he would most likely keep it from her. Edward did not like keeping things from his mother, but when it came to girls, his mother just did not know when to quit.
Edward pulled into the driveway a few moments later. Once he made sure his mother was safely inside the home, he stepped out of the car and took a walk around town. Without his prompting, his feet carried him to the place where he knew Bella would be. He looked up at the familiar house and stared for what felt like hours. He focused his eyes on the front door of the house, as if will would get Bella to come out. Oddly enough, she did, and Edward's tree-green eyes brightened when he saw her.
"Edward?" she questioned once she saw him.
"Hello, Bella," he responded.
Bella tilted her head in question, wondering why Edward was in her front yard. "Did you want something?"
Edward shook his head. "I was just in the neighborhood." He shrugged, feigning nonchalance. If he was being honest with himself, he would have ended up at Bella's place even if his feet hadn't taken him there.
"Well, would you like to come in?"
The smile that lit up Edward's face could be seen from the moon. "I would love to."
Edward followed Bella inside, feeling both wary and excited. He wasn't sure what to do or say, but he knew that once they started talking, everything would be normal again. Edward and Bella settled in the living room, and at first, the room was filled with silence. Edward's thoughts focused on how beautiful Bella looked as she bit her lower lip and played with her fingers, while Bella's thoughts focused on how much Edward had changed since she had last seen him in high school seven years ago.
"So," Edward said, having finally gained the courage to speak. That one word was all it took to diffuse the tension that had rose in the room.
"So?" Bella countered.
"How have you been?" Edward asked with a smile, though his insides were churning.
"I've been good. I recently moved back to Forks after a year of being out of school. I figured I should maintain my roots."
Edward chuckled, which caused a smile to light up Bella's features. "Good choice."
Bella nodded and reflected Edward's inquiry. She didn't know it, but to Edward, Bella had asked him a loaded question. Edward's thoughts seemed to stop, and he sat there staring at Bella for what seemed like forever.
"Edward?" Bella asked after a few minutes.
Edward's eyes had a startled look inside them as they refocused on Bella. He cleared his throat and replied. "I've been well." Edward didn't want to tell Bella that the last seven years consisted of him kicking himself for not tell her that he had been in love with her since they had officially become friends. He also didn't want to tell her that she had been on his mind ever since he saw her earlier that day.
"Good," was Bella's only response.
Edward sighed, hating himself for not being able to have a normal conversation with Bella. He thought he could do it, but he was wrong. His mind and heart warred once more, and he questioned whether or not he should confess his love right then and there.
"Edward, it's getting late," Bella stated after a while.
Edward looked down at his watch, and his eyes widened at the time. "I'm sorry. You must be tired."
Bella smiled softly at Edward and told him that it was fine. She only worried about him walking home late at night.
"I'll live," Edward told her with a smile.
Bella nodded and walked Edward to the door. Before he left, Edward had a spur of encouragement and turned to face her. "I have something I need to tell you."
Bella looked up at Edward expectantly. Her mind whirred with questions as she patiently awaited his confession.
"I…" Edward trailed off.
"Yes, Edward?"
The words were at the tip of Edward's tongue, but he couldn't bring himself to say them. He tried not to lose himself in Bella's eyes as he stared down at her. With a small sigh, he stepped back, out of the doorway and into the cold night. "I missed you," he settled, chickening out.
Bella smiled softly up at him, though her eyes shone with disappointment. "I missed you, too."
With that, Edward turned and walked away from Bella. As he trekked back home, Edward fought with himself over having not told Bella how he felt. The wind seemed to reflect Edward's thoughts as it screeched into the night.
oOOOo
Though the two were miles off, and lay in separate beds, Edward and Bella's thoughts mirrored each other's: I love you.
