A/N This is my first fic, I really hope it will turn out good. If there is any spelling mistakes, I'm really sorry, I'll try to correct it as soon as I can. English is not my native language, so there will possibly be many mistakes.

Anyway, about the story - it is sad. Dee is my character, she is a common girl, she falls for him, he... well, you'll see.;)

Disclaimer: I own nothing but Dee, but if Fred wants, he can own me.

Enjoy reading!


'Sometimes I think I could cry until I die. Sometimes I want to cry myself to death. But it would never be enough to show how much I suffer without you, without your shameless jokes and shiny smile. It hurts so bad when I think about you, knowing I could never see you again. Just see you, it could help me a bit, you know? Do you remember that day, when we first kissed, and I told you it hurts me to know I will never be able to kiss you? Well remember this now; kiss with you is just a dream, but the biggest, heartbreaking hope, the desire of my heart is just to see you, hear your voice, just know you're there somewhere!

Can you remember that for me?

No. Because, darling, you've left me here alone, you're dead.

Forever yours,

Dee.'

I wiped the tears away from my cheeks, shaking my hands, hoping the endless tears would stop and leave me alone, but no sooner than I thought about that they came back, in a new, fresh, bitter sweet wave.

A letter I wrote to my love was laying in front of me, on the dark wooden table I bought in Diagon Alley, and I sobbed as I stroked it's surface.

I never knew losing someone could hurt this hard, I never even thought about losing someone. I was just another common girl, not looking for love or heartbreak, when I met Fred Weasley. I was in love with him since I first saw him, but first time we spoke was on our fifth grade.

He probably wouldn't even take a second look at me if I didn't know the exact difference between him and his brother George. When I asked him for the password at our fifth year at Hogwarts, saying: "Hey Fred, you know the password? I kind of forgot it.", he nudged his brother with his elbow and said: "I'm not Fred, I'm George!"

I just smiled and waved my hand. "Rubbish. Give me the password, Fred."

From that moment on, Fred Weasley never missed the shot to try and confuse me. He never did it. We started dating at the end of the sixth year, but we soon broke up because of the holydays.

"You'll never have fun if you have a girlfriend waiting for you. You and George are lady's men, I know that. I'm doing this for you." I told him as I left the train station, not letting him see the single tear that rolled down my cheek. Little did I know, that I really was his only lady, as he used to call me.

When I went back to Hogwarts in the early September, he was the first person I saw on the train station. He hugged me and told me he had the most boring summer ever, and told me to never leave him again. He didn't even ask me if I still liked him, he was so full of himself. Still, we crossed the platform nine and three quarters holding each other's hand.

"Dee?" I heard someone calling me and enter the room. Turning around in my chair, my heart skipped a beat.

"Fred?" I gasped.

The man just shook his head, and I saw pity in his eyes. "Dee, it's me, George."

"Oh…" I sank down in my chair, looking everywhere except George.

"You've got to stop this." I heard him say. I winced again at the sound of his voice; so like Fred, so close.

"What?" I asked.

He sighed and walked towards me, kneeling down to make me look in his eyes. Once again, I winced, feeling my chest squeeze. So like Fred.

"You must stop with this. It's been almost a year already. You were the only one to always know the difference between us. Now, we can't be more different, and you keep messing up. Dee, let him go."

I rolled my eyes to side, looking away from his bright brown gaze, hoping he would go away. We still lived in the same place, like when Fred was alive. We were like siblings, George sometimes knew more than Fred, he was my closest friend. But somehow, I couldn't stand him anymore. Every time I saw him, I thought about Fred. Unconsciously, George kept hurting me with his presence.

"You should know." My voice trembled as I blinked fast, trying to make the water in my eyes go away. "You should know the best. I can't. Why can't you understand?"

"I do, Dee! I do, I miss him every single day, moment, second! But it's not what he would want."

"Well it's not death he wanted either." I snapped and rose up from the chair.

"Dee!" he shouted as I left the room. "Dee, stop it! You're not thinking clearly!"

Indeed I wasn't thinking clearly. But I didn't care, who would?

My parents were dead for almost five years, my brother died the same night Fred did, I had no family except from Weasley's, and I couldn't stand to be with them anymore. I couldn't stand being with anyone anymore.

I climbed up to the top of the roof. There, I sat and watched the sunset, clenching the letter I took from the table as I left the room in my fist. A year ago, Fred and I sat at this exact spot, having the time of our lives.

"You know there's going to be a battle soon enough, don't you?" Fred said.

I smiled. We were always avoiding these topics. "Sure, and we're going to win it!"

Fred laughed. "Well, I would be really surprised if one look at you wouldn't just scare them away."

I punched him slightly with my shoulder. "Dumdum."

"Liar, I know you love me." He joked. But I slightly tensed, this was the other topic we always avoided. Except of telling him how hard I fell for him the first time we kissed, we never talked about our feelings before.

He felt my change and threw one arm around me. "You do love me, don't you?" he teased, but his eyes betrayed him; he felt uneasy about this, too.

"Of course I do, you chocolate frog." I answered. But my voice wasn't teasing, nor were my eyes, and we both knew it.

He kissed my cheek. "I knew you're a candy person."

We kept joking for a while, but that night, before I fell asleep in his arms, he whispered to my ear, "I love you."

I smiled and answered, "I love you more."

I never knew why he mentioned the battle before, but now I thought maybe he felt something was going to turn out wrong.

I missed him so much. The air around me became more and more cold with every second, and I didn't know whether it was from the wetter or my sadness.

I now regret for not telling him how much I loved him. Because I did, more than anything on the world.

It was so hard. To live, when he did not, to breathe the air he will not feel ever again, it was all too much, too hard.

I didn't know why I wrote the bloody letter, I just had the urge to let him know how I feel.

I never knew how he was when he died. I wasn't even there with him. And that was the thought that haunted me the most. I saw Tonks die, and soon I saw Lupin die too, I even saw that Creevey boy die, but when Fred died, I wasn't there.

He was the one to make me go after Tonks.

"Go,", he said, "Try to save her, she's blind now."

I kissed his cheek quickly, but before I ran away, he grabbed me around my waist, pulling me back in his hug. Then he kissed me, and muttered. "But please, first save yourself."

Sobbing, I let go of his hand, not breaking the eye contact. "I love you, be safe." I whispered. He grinned down at me, and we parted.

My body shook from the memories, sobs escaping my mouth every now and then. I buried my head in my hands, pressing my knees closer.

I obeyed his warnings, and sometimes, my heart started beating fast when I thought about Tonks.

I saw her running towards Dolohov and Bellatrix. Lupin stood there alone, and if I only ran faster, I could've reached for Tonks and stopped her before she threw herself in the battle, and falling down to the ground only a second later. But I saw more Death Eaters coming towards them, and Fred's words echoed in my mind. Save yourself.

So I slowed my pace, calling her name, not running so fast now. And when she fell, I saw Lupin being distracted. "Tonks! NO!" his cries were so painful I winced.

Soon, someone's curse hit him.

Death Eaters were gone, and I ran to my dead friends. Tears ran down my cheeks, making new patterns on my skin. I shook them both.

"Tonks!" I yelped, shaking her shoulders. "N-no!"

Lupin didn't respond either, but their expressions were both calm. I kneeled beside them "I'm so sorry," I whispered "I am so, so sorry!"

If I ran after Tonks, would I change anything? Could I? Or would the only change be my death?

I promised to him, I promised Fred I wouldn't risk it.

As soon as his name came to my thoughts, I jumped and ran back to the castle, rushing to him, to keep him safe, 'cause he needed to be safe. If he wasn't, if he was hurt, than I would be hurt too.

"Rookwood!" That couldn't be Percy's voice, could it? I have never heard him sound so desperate.

But then he ran only few inches away from me, and with horror, I noticed tears on his cheeks.

I ran fast to the direction he came from.

My eyes were already blinded, like I knew what happened. "NO!" I yelled when someone's hand caught mine. Hermione shushed me, her smutty cheeks dotted with tears. She pushed me to the corner her, Harry, Ron and George were standing in. But... where was Fred?

"I'm so sorry." She said. Her voice was trembling, and tears came faster and she sobbed, looking down next to her feet.

"NO! No, Fred, NO!" I threw myself down on the ground. His face was pale and his eyes were open, his beautiful brown eyes stunned and petrified, forever. I ran my fingers through his hair, my other hand stroking his cheek. "No, no, no…" I muttered, and put my head down on his chest. Nothing. I cried harder.

Somewhere between all the crying and sobbing I noticed Hermione, Harry and Ron were all gone, except from George. I looked up at him. He was sitting next to Fred, looking to his twins eyes, not blinking. Silent tears rolled down his cheeks too. I looked down to his hands. He clenched his fingers around Fred's left hand, just sitting there, crying.

Once again, I looked down to Fred's face.

I could never, ever forget that grin he had when I looked at him.

Sun was already gone, and the moon was up. My eyes were still watery, but my skin was dry. I couldn't, no, I wouldn't cry anymore.

I loved him so much. And he was gone. He was too young, too good to die. Just like everyone else in the last battle.

They were victims of the Great Hogwarts War, as everyone called it. Voldemort took away so much from us.

Yes, Fred was one of the victims. But I? How would you call me? Heartbreaking love victim?

There was no such thing. But I couldn't stand waking up in the night, finding out the bed on the other side was empty and cold, and that Fred's clothes already lost it's smell.

I couldn't live this way. I finally knew what was that I had to do. Suddenly, I heard his voice, answering to my realization.

"It took you long enough."

"I know, but now I'm here!"

He grinned, "You always come late."

He knew me so well. I slowly stepped closer to the edge of the roof. I wrapped the letter and put it in the pocket of my jumper.

The memory I heard just a moment ago still kept my minds on it. It was Christmas time, and we were supposed to meet in front of the Burrow, but I was few minutes late.

Now, I had the feeling he would say the same thing.

I knew this was the only way to be with him. I hoped George won't be the one to find my body, but I couldn't worry about that now. I was about to jump from the roof, to be back with my ginger boyfriend. How crazy was that?
"Bloody hell, that's bloody crazy" I whispered, grinning. I was surprised to feel the smile on my face, as it wasn't there for almost a year.

I sighed. Why am I putting this away?

I found it kind of relieving to know I was about to die. So many wizards tried to do the opposite thing, but it was the last thing I wanted. Eternity without him.

I shuddered. No way. I was going to do this.

Taking in the last breath in my life, I jumped.

I closed my eyes and grinned as the air whistled around me.

Fred, here I come.


"It took you long enough."

"I know, but now I'm here!"

He grinned, "You always come late."

I pulled him by his hand, "But I always come, that's what matters!"

He laughed. Then he stopped walking and pulled me in his hug. "You know I'm glad you do."

My heart pounded fast as he closed the distance between our lips. When he pulled away, he was smirking. Breathlessly, I lied, "I hate when you shut me up like that."

His laugh came out loud, "Liar!"

I smiled. "I love you, Fred Weasley."


A/N So? What do you think? Please review, and tell me everything!