Restructure Life
by Michaela Will
After depositing the rest of the mail where his mother could find it, he took the letter to his room. Sitting down in the middle of his sparse room, he opened it carefully and smiled slightly as he read its contents. He'd passed the Kaibara High School entrance exam. They would be looking forward to hearing back from him. Yuki also surmised they'd be looking forward to the check from the prominent Sohma family for his tuition, public school or not.
"Not that money will be the issue," he scornfully reminded Hatsuharu during his next 'visit,' "The hard part will be getting Akito to agree."
Hatsuharu sat on the floor crosslegged. He was skimming over the letter that Yuki had shown him. Rin sat in the corner sullenly with her knees tucked up.
"It's a good school." He said finally.
Yuki nodded, "Compared to the Sohma school, it's only okay academically, but Kaibara has a very decent record overall and a very active student community. I can try to push that point with Akito."
They both knew that academics at the Sohma school didn't really matter anymore. Challenging or not, the Sohma name, after so many generations (and donations) now guaranteed any member of the family could go there, do the time, and leave with a diploma. Due to that sort of practice the school had lost prestige, from a certain perspective, over the last few years and traditionally was considered a better school. But tradition did not account for reality. Even with backing from the Sohmas and a few other prominent families such as the Kawabatas, that school's reputation had slipped and the curriculum was rumored, as Yuki had heard, to be less challenging than it used to be.
This was one reason Yuki wanted to go elsewhere: he wanted to earn his degree. He needed more of a challenge than having his degree handed to him, or he'd go crazy from numbness. He was already going crazy from numbness. At least at Kaibara he would have to earn his place, even if it was easier academically than the Sohma school. There would be no precedent for him to fit into. However, THE main reason for Yuki's move was to escape the confines of the Sohma household.
"So where's the problem?" Hatsuharu asked. Yuki blinked at him. Hatsuharu stared back. Rin rolled her eyes from the corner and returned to staring out the small window.
"I don't want to tell—I mean ask Akito-san—if I can attend this school by myself," Yuki spoke very softly. "I know they won't like it and I'll have to fight for it." There was no way any of them were going to point at the Sohma school's reputation as a reason to avoid the place. Therefore, the fight would be more difficult as the easiest weapon – the fact a degree from there meant little anymore in the hands of a Sohma or Kawabata – was off limits and could not be mentioned by any party. Hatsuharu didn't need to ask why the Rat was afraid to assert himself to Akito without some support structure. He thoughtfully lowered his eyes and bent his mind to the question.
Yuki continued, "I thought about asking my parents, but they are already fighting with me over this. They won't help with Akito-san."
Hatsuharu understood, "It ought to be a Juunishi," he supplied, "One of the older ones then."
The older ones: Hatori, Shigure, and Ayame.
Kureno, Ritsu, Rin, and Kagura also were older, but there remained a distinct difference between the oldest three Juunishi and the others. Yuki innately knew Hatsuharu was only referring the former. The oldest three were, in some ways, freer.
"Hatori-san knows." Yuki said thoughtfully, "Or at least, he knows I applied and took the exams for more schools that Akito-san required. I don't know if he knows exactly where. I suppose I should ask him."
Haru tilted his chin at the anxious Rat. He let his eyes slide to the corner where they met Rin's. She had removed them from studying the window and let her steady, strong gaze bore into Haru and burn through to his ears. They shared the same thought. Rin resumed staring out the window. Haru shook his head.
"Not Hatori-san. He won't be able to help you." Yuki's hopeful eyes dropped as did his silence. Doom fell over his frame. Haru understood that Yuki would never consider asking Ayame, so submission to Akito's unchallenged will began to settle over Yuki.
"You could ask—"
"No! I'm not asking Nii-san!" Yuki snapped.
"Shigure-san." Hatsuharu finished mildly. He gave it a moment to let the idea sink in.
For the very reason Hatori would not help, Shigure could. All the Juunishi knew about Hana. Some older members of the family had tried to hide the truth of Hatori's injury and Hana's retreat from the younger Juunishi, feeling they could not understand. Hatsuharu remembered his own mother shying from telling him the truth, stuttering, and trying to distract him from the issue.
They were the ones that didn't understand what the Juunishi shared. Ayame, Shigure, and Rin had made sure they all understood. The cursed ones also all knew Hana unwittingly owed Shigure quite the debt for his interference. Shigure was, perhaps, the only Juunishi to effectively oppose Akito's when he physically stopped him from harming Kana.
Further, like Ayame, Shigure never seemed to fear Akito. It was different for the older ones; the ones who remembered a time before Akito was old enough to exert his will. Hatori had never seemed afraid of Akito either, until Hana. It was heartwrenching to see the Dragon (who really should have been one of the greatest of them) reduced under Akito's thumb.
But after Hana, Hatori had changed. He had never opposed Akito's will before, but the sheer ability to consider it appeared to be complete struck from his emotional scale. Hatori would never directly confront Akito again. Akito was probably biding his time for an opportunity to do the same thing to Ayame and Shigure. But that, Haru thought with blackened spite, would take a long time waiting. Shigure was unlikely to give Akito such an opening and Ayame rarely was around to see or be affected by Akito.
"Shigure-san might work." Yuki said slowly.
"Then you ought to ask him." Hatsuharu answered.
Rin stood up from the corner as Yuki opened his mouth. "I'm bored," She said, "I'm going home." He eyes stamped into Haru and he rose also. Yuki's eyes changed and he threw his gaze away from Hatsuharu and Rin. Hatsuharu noticed that his relaxed frame was tightening up.
Haru shook his head, his eyes soft and pained. "It's okay. We'll talk again later. You ask Shigure-san and tell me how it goes."
Yuki nodded.
Yuki took a deep breath. He walked forward calmly, fingering the letter sticking out the side of his school bag. The doors of the traditional building stood open to let in the light breeze outside. From the front step Yuki could see dishes splayed across the low table in the main room. A towel was visible, tossed at the foot of the stairs. Near the door to what Yuki presumed was the kitchen sat a stack of books with bits of newspaper sticking out.
He cleared his throat, "Shigure-san. Are you home?"
He heard a thump from the next room. Yuki toed off his shoes and looked for a pair of slippers. There were none next to the door, but he spotted a pair halfway under the stack of books. Carefully, he made his way over to them and put them on, making sure to remove the handkerchief he found in the toe of the left one.
"Ah! Yuki-kun! How nice of you to come and visit my lonely little home! Please, please! Come in and make yourself comfortable," He poked his head in the kitchen, "I would offer you a cup of tea, but I'm afraid I can't find my teakettle at the moment."
Yuki seated himself at the table, piling the dishes near him to make space. "Please don't go through such trouble on my account, cousin. I don't need tea, thank you."
Shigure looked brightly at Yuki. He stroked his chin, "I see. So what could bring my young cousin so far out of his way to see me, I wonder. It couldn't possibly be to congratulate me on my recent publication." Shigure smiled happily. Yuki was familiar with Shigure's rambling. He was also aware of the Dog's cunning. He let his eyes follow Shigure meaningfully as the writer sat, more so lounged, across the table.
"And it couldn't possibly be you would like my help with your writing, I understand you are doing wonderfully in school." Yuki felt his temper rise at the banality of it all, but he checked it. Shigure calmed from his playful self-banter. His eyes changed. "So to what do I owe the pleasure?"
Yuki allowed a light, cunning smile to match the one on his cousin's face. "I would like your help on a matter, Shigure-san." He pushed his Kaibara entrance exam across the table.
Shigure picked up the paper and pulled a pair of writer's glasses out of his yukata. He hummed over the pages for a few moments before putting them down.
"I think I may understand. You wish to attend this school?" Yuki nodded and Shigure smiled, "And I'm assuming Akito doesn't know about this yet, ne?" He waved around the paper, a sing-song lilt to his voice.
"No," Yuki replied lowly, "He doesn't know yet."
"Well, you'll need to speak to him about this matter soon; this suggests your acceptance forms need to be turned in next week."
"I can probably get an extension if necessary," Yuki said blithely, "But you address the issue I came to speak to you about Shigure-san." Yuki's finger twitched against his palm. He held no illusion that Shigure would not notice. "Akito-san."
Shigure nodded and hummed softly, "I see."
The pair sat quietly for a moment. Shigure returned to looking over the entrance papers for his cousin. Yuki could tell he was carefully musing over the options given. For his part, Yuki remained completely still. He had no intention of begging, but he felt as if his chances hinged on Shigure's agreement to support him. As the seconds ticked by Yuki felt his blood pounding against his ribcage and through his ears. He swallowed hard.
"It is a good school," Shigure said finally, "But there are some points to consider. It's co-educational for one."
"I'll deal with that."
Shigure chuckled, "At your age that was a problem I would have loved. Ah! A high school girl in her pleated skirt! How I would have enjoyed seeing it everyday in class!" He grinned, "I would still find such a challenge enjoyable. You're not afraid of it?"
"Why should I be?" Yuki responded evenly, "It's not like girls are going to be trying to hug me everyday in class. We'll be sitting at our desks and we're separated for gym anyway. Really, I'm at the most risk of being accidentally bumped into on the way to school and that's the same no matter where I go."
"But that raises another issue. This school is in a different neighborhood than the Sohma compound. Your commute would be longer and thus more dangerous." Shigure paused thoughtfully for a moment, "Actually, Kaibara's neighborhood is closer to here than the main compound. It would make sense for you to go there if you lived with me." Yuki looked up at Shigure quickly, who had an eyebrow raised and a light smile on his face.
"Well Yuki-kun, if you say you can deal with the girls and this is where you want to go, I think you should. I have to say I'm jealous. I wish I had thought to go to a co-ed public school." His eyes shined at the possibility, "But the Sohma boy's school was the only school in the region worth considering then."
Yuki nodded, "Thank you, Shigure-san. Would…" he hesitated, "Would you go with me when I speak to Akito-san on Thursday? That's when the Sohma school results arrive and I have to bring them to Akito-san."
Shigure closed his eyes with a nod. When he spoke, it was with a tone of formality Yuki only heard Shigure use in connection with the most serious of affairs, "I will come to the main compound on Thursday and meet you. I will represent the Juunishi on your behalf and express to Akito our trust that you are capable and ready for this challenge." He smiled blithely, his voice becoming light, "After all, Yuki-kun is the Rat. You are the smartest and most gifted of us. You should have challenges in your life to meet that position."
Yuki smiled, it was the only response he had when people commented on the gift of the Rat. A curse is still a curse. Even with that damper, he had to hold his elation in check. Shigure's gift of gab was legendary. If anyone could talk Akito into letting Yuki go to Kaibara, Shigure was it. He shifted back from the table and bowed to Shigure, "Thank you very much, Shigure-san. I greatly appreciate the trouble you are going through on my behalf."
Shigure simply smiled lightly.
Hatsuharu always listened carefully to the slight inflections in Yuki's voice and body. He was sitting straighter today. He admired the boy's frame: the lithe shape of his torso, the way his hair highlighted expressive, grey eyes that rarely sparkled the way they used to.
Hatsuharu slipped softly into his room, rolling his feet gently to avoid noise. He let a mad grin loose for the other boy when Yuki looked up from his homework to see the Ox on quiet cloven feet. There was a touch of excited sparkle to them now that Yuki showed only to him. Hatsuharu saw them change when he and Rin slipped inside Yuki's room. He could just barely remember when those eyes shone with unfiltered intelligence constantly. Now they were clouded with fear and worry when Yuki was left to himself, dimmed by anxiety. The bright and capable Rat was shown to his parents, the Sohma clan, and schoolmates, but Hatsuharu knew the look faded when Yuki was left alone.
The anxiety and fear still wrapped gnarled fingers around Yuki, but he sat more confidently entwined in the strangulating grasp.
Rin, Hatsuharu knew, did not notice the difference. He listened to Yuki, confident he knew the reason. Yuki put down his pen, smiling softly, his eyes saying he was glad for the company.
"I spoke to Shigure-san."
"Ah?" Hatsuharu sat down cross-legged and prepared to listen.
The Ox stood looking up at the traditional style house, his arms hanging limply at his sides. He waited patiently.
It didn't take long before Shigure came to the door. He leaned casually on the frame, and stroked his chin, "It seems my humble little home is becoming popular with my young cousins. Are you going to come in Haru-kun?"
Hatsuharu's mellow eyes looked Shigure over. He walked calmly to the door, some nameless expression hanging around his mouth. When he stood next to Shigure he stopped and looked straight into the Dog's black eyes.
"You knew one of us would be back eventually, so you don't need to pretend you're surprised."
Shigure stood up straight, all smiles, "My Haru-kun, what a way to talk to your elders! I don't have any idea what you mean." He led Hatsuharu inside and snagged his teapot from behind a coat, "If you will excuse me one moment, Haru-kun, I will have tea for us to sit and talk." He slipped quickly into the kitchen, leaving Hatsuharu in the main room that looked no cleaner than Yuki had described it.
Hatsuharu did not sit. He wandered into Shigure's study, which was somewhat cleaner than the other rooms, despite the volume of paper strewn about. Looking down the hall from the study, Hatsuharu caught sight of a staircase leading to the second floor. On the first two stairs a neat stack of planking leaned against the wall, hiding a case of nails and brackets behind it. Shigure came back in with two cups and the teapot on a tray as Haru hefted a hammer. He held it up for Shigure to see.
"Ah! I'm having some repairs done to one of my rooms upstairs. The young man I hired will be finished in a few days, but asked if he could leave some of his tools here."
Hatsuharu put down the hammer wordlessly. He sat at the table, letting Shigure pour and talk about his book, "It really is doing very well for a book of its type. I got some very positive feedback from a novelist in Osaka I correspond with. Yes, yes, I'm afraid I'm doing quite well, except I believe that my editor is upset with me again. I don't know how that's possible, after all, my latest work is a success and it is in part a tribute to her skills." He chuckled lowly. Hatsuharu listen and sipped his tea, wondering what the joke was this time. What was that poor editor's name again? Mit-chan would be… Haru dismissed the thought; it didn't matter.
Shigure was clearly enjoying the visit and chatted easily, not at all concerned that Hatsuharu didn't respond with more than a thoughtful look or sip. But his eyes, Shigure's eyes…
Was it possible the Dog was lonely?
He had chose to leave the main Sohma compound, but his house was all off by itself; still on Sohma lands and a good walk away from other houses or main roads. Had Shigure ever mentioned why he'd chosen this house? Mostly the Sohmas all assumed he'd wanted privacy and quiet that could not be had within the compound or city proper for writing. That probably was part of it. But had Shigure had enough of his quiet abode? Hatsuharu focused on his cousin.
"You've been busy then." Hatsuharu responded. Shigure blinked at him for a moment.
"Not really. Writing does come naturally to me, after all, so I have plenty of time to lavish on my other interests; and family concerns, of course."
"Like getting involved in Yuki's choice for a high school." The tone of the room changed. It was not less friendly, but clearly more serious. Shigure looked at Hatsuharu steadily.
"Yes, I suppose that is exactly what I am referring to." They were silent for a moment.
Hatsuharu bowed his head to his cousin, "I have a request of you, Shigure-san," Hatsuharu looked down sightlessly at his knees. He knew this was right, "Please consider taking Yuki into your home when he goes to Kaibara High School." There was silence again for a moment. Shigure hummed and Hatsuharu, upon hearing the sound, sat upright. Shigure's eyes were honestly thoughtful.
"That's an interesting favor you ask, Haru-kun." He paused for a moment, then smiled, "And let me see: 'You have space for another person to live here Shigure-san, all that extra room upstairs. And don't forget it's closer to Yuki's new school. It would mean so much to his parents for you to help him out like this.' Am I close?"
"No."
"Oh? Then why did you ask?"
"Yuki needs it." Hatsuharu paused, "I think you might need it too."
With a genuine smile Shigure replied, "My, my, Haru-kun, that's such a thing to say. If I weren't such an easy-going guy, I might be offended by that last comment. You should be more careful, Haru-kun, or people will start to think you're being difficult on purpose."
Haru brushed away the Black itch developing in his mind. Now was not the time to loose it. "Shigure-san, please consider taking Yuki into your home. You know I would not ask unless it was necessary." Or, Haru thought, if you had not put the notion into Yuki's head.
Shigure was silent for a minute. "You believe the situation is that bad for Yuki?" he asked. Haru didn't respond verbally. He stared into the Dog's eyes for a moment and then bowed formally, hands clasped in front of him. "Please," he said formally, "take Yuki into you home."
Hatsuharu did not look up, but he could tell he'd hit a nerve. Shigure was very quiet and slowly slurped his tea while staring out the opening to his left. Hatsuharu eventually sat up, then refilled Shigure's cup. They sat quietly for a few minutes. Haru let Shigure ponder, choosing for himself to let his eyes meander around the Dog's home.
It did seem something of a traditional looking Japanese den. A puppy would have a great deal of fun hiding under all the objects strewn around and nipping snacks from licking the bottom of bowls left in the main room. It wasn't trash strewn around here so much as a clutter of stuff (and a handful of dishes). He surmised the real mess was in the kitchen. The Rat would have a little adjustment, coming to live in such a space, but as long as his own room was clean and he was away from Akito's overwhelming presence, Haru figured Yuki wouldn't care about a few dirty dishes.
"Okay!" Shigure chirped brightly, "I'll arrange for Yuki-kun come live here when he goes to Kaibara." Haru turned, stunned at his light expression. Shigure waved a hand, "Don't fret I will take care of all the horrid little details and I assume you don't want Yuki-kun to know you asked." Hatsuharu nodded slowly.
"But," Shigure added, a mocking seriousness on his face, "You have to call me 'Sensei' from now on if I do." Shigure smile was sly.
"Alright, Sensei."
Yuki sat against the wall outside Akito's gray quarters. He pressed his back tightly to the wall and his knees pressed to his chest. His school shirt was probably wrinkling, but Yuki didn't care to think about his clothes right now. He was edgy, ready to start gnawing on his fingernails, or some other nervous habit. The only thing that stopped him from doing so was holding his knees tightly to his chest.
Akito would come looking for him any moment. Or more correctly, Akito would finish his doctor's appointment with Hatori and send the Dragon or someone else to find him. Yuki looked at his school satchel. The acceptance letters from the Sohma school and Kaibara were neatly protected in a folder standing up in the bag's front pocket. He tried to relax, tried laying his head across his knees. His hair fell in a silky ripple across his eyes and over his legs.
A sound from the end of the hall drew his attention, but it was just a Sohma walking by, not Shigure. Yuki forced the fear that Shigure was not coming from his mind. Shigure would not have said he would unless he was coming… right? The horror stories Yuki had heard of Shigure tormenting his editor began to find their way into his thoughts.
Yuki chewed on his lip and hid his face under his hair, forehead on his knees. With deeps breaths, he quelled the fear and swallowed his doubts. He pressed his palms deeply into his eye sockets to avoid tears. He had to try asking Akito, even… even if he did it alone. When he finally moved to stand, Shigure was hanging over him.
"Ready to go? Akito's kept your parents cooling their heels in his room for the last fifteen minutes and now he'd like to get started." Yuki neglected the offered hand up and took two steps past Shigure towards the door.
Without turning he answered, "Thanks for your support, Shigure-san. Without it, I don't know if I could manage this." It was work enough fighting his mother on this. He knew dealing with both Akito and his mother would be too much. He walked inside the grey rooms.
Shigure sat down next to Yuki, separated by a few feet from Yuki's parents. Akito sat by the window, absently twisting a birdcage through his elegant fingers. He stared out the window, a pensive, thoughtful look on his face. He tilted his face back to view the blue sky outside, his hair falling away from his face the show his relaxed features. Calm, like this, Akito really was a beautiful young man.
"Shigure tells me you have something to show me, Yuki. I assume it's about you high school placement test, after all, that is the purpose for you and your parents to meet with me today."
Yuki swallowed. He pulled the folder with his acceptances from his bag and pushed it forward, wordlessly. He watched the floor as Akito stood, heavily footfalls making their way towards him. Akito's long fingers brushed the tatami with a light rustle of nails and straw as he wrapped his hands around the folder.
Akito stood over him, reading the letters. Yuki could feel his heavy gaze and kept his eyes down listening to the light waft of paper.
"Have your parents approved of this… Kaibara High School?"
Yuki pressed his lips together. The question was not actually addressed to him. He had talked to his parents about this, many times trying to get the idea through his mother's head. She never seemed to hear or see the things important to him. The only question was how she'd present it to Akito. He felt cold to his core as she cleared her throat almost imperceptibly.
"Akito-sama, we have been discussing the possibility of letting him go, but have not yet reached a decision. High school is an important part of his education, and both schools are acceptable to us and have different strengths. As Yuki is important to the family as a whole, we felt the decision may be too great for us to decide alone."
Yuki kept his face stone cold, his eyes unwillingly sliding up and meeting Akito's mocking smile. Akito heard the same thing Yuki did: 'we leave the choice to you, Akito-sama.' His mother's desire to suck up to Akito was stronger than her desire to control her son. Yuki felt disgust coating the back of his throat.
Akito took the documents back to the window with him. He stared away ten minutes, busy in his own thoughts. Yuki felt every second in his tight jaw and stiff knees. The room was silent and he did not dare shift or take any action, for fear of breaking the silence. His parents seemed to be held by the same tenet and looked very uncomfortable doing so. His mother, in particular, was the sort of modern woman who was no longer used to waiting on another person like this.
Shigure, on the other hand, shifted comfortably every few minutes. His yukata would slush against the floor and make soft noises. Yuki watched out of the corner of his eye as Shigure studied his fingers and rubbed out ink stains on the pads of his fingers. He then picked at his cuticles; first pushing them back, then plucking and smoothing frayed bits of skin. He rubbed a writer's mark on his right hand, studying the callused bump with an air of removed interest.
Yuki vaguely recalled Shigure once saying something to the effect of while his work was that of the mind, the physical manifestation of his work was his hands and at book signing fans expected his hands would look attractive and intelligent with a pen in them. It was probably said while shopping with his cousin or when receiving gifts, or some other time. Ah, how could he forget? Momiji had forcibly dragged Yuki Christmas shopping with him and Shigure, and the discussion had come up over what to Hatori-san for Christmas. What had Momiji ended up getting him? It had not been the hand cream Shigure had suggested.
"Shigure?" Akito's soft voice slid through the air. Yuki's body jumped back into a stiff position. Musing on Shigure, he'd begun to bodily relax.
Two heavy steps padded away from the window, "I know why the others are here, but you haven't told me why you're interested in Yuki's high school." He paused a moment, as if considering his next mocking words carefully, "I wouldn't have expected you'd care. Like Ayame." Yuki wondered if his wince was visible. Shigure tilted his head slightly and opened his eyes widely, clearly ignoring the comment.
"Why, I should have thought that would be clear. As Haa-kun is unable to take part in this discussion, as the next oldest of the Juunishi, I am taking his place. I am here to represent the Juunishi in this matter." Shigure's mouth twitched slightly towards a smile as he spoke. Akito, on the other hand, marred his features by scowling deeply, clearly affronted.
"After all," Shigure continued, "Yuki-kun is the Rat. His position means he is of particular importance to the rest of us." Shigure looked at Yuki, who felt he understood what unsaid: He was the first among equals beholden to Akito. He was the 'first' of the cursed family members and somehow gifted by his curse. But there was so much he did not understand about how the Dog had answered the Sohma Master and the look in Shigure's eyes. He really had not answered the question very well, as Hatori's involvement was not requested or required either, which seemed to be his intention. Yuki wisely kept his mouth shut.
Akito didn't seem to notice as he was too busy being upset by Shigure's playful, testing answer. He drew his mouth into a harsh parody of a smile, "Well then, Shigure, please tell us what you recommend for our dear cousin." Despite the soft, cultured tones there was something rotten in the core of Akito's voice. Shigure seemed not to take notice.
"Well, Yuki and I discussed some of the finer points of both schools and I have spoken to the other Juunishi about the matter." Yuki thought the conversation he and Shigure had would barely qualify as a 'discussion of the finer point of both schools' he wondered what Shigure's conversations with 'other Juunishi' were like. He imagined it to be something along the lines of a gabby, gossipy phone conversation with Ayame or maybe Hatori. "We feel that the preference that Yuki-kun has expressed, specifically the desire to attend Kaibara, is acceptable and should he choose to attend that school then we support his choice."
Shigure spoke to Akito calmly and steadily, looking him in the eye. Akito looked down his nose at his cousin, but his features had relaxed again. Yuki watched the pair. There was clearly something different about the manner in which these two interacted. Akito's gaze briefly slid to Yuki, who struggled to hold his gaze properly lower despite the temptation to meet Akito's eyes. Akito, with a brow arched, returned to Shigure.
"We?" He echoed.
"I brought the matter up with those Juunishi old enough to fully understand and appreciate it. Haa-san, Aya-san, Kureno-san, although he and Rin both seemed rather disinterested, Kagura-chan, Rit-chan, who didn't think his opinion would or should matter, Momiji-kun and Hatsuharu-kun. I did not consult Kisa-chan, Hiro-kun, or him, true, so I suppose I am not speaking for all the Juunishi." Shigure looked thoughtful as he made this admission, "However those I did speak to were all in agreement."
Yuki found himself surprised by this statement. It couldn't possibly be true that nine of the Juunishi actually agreed on something. They were all so, different. After all, it seemed at times Rin would say or do things just to contradict the rest of them. Also, had Shigure really spoken to all of them about Yuki's choice? It was so much more… thorough than Yuki had expected. Shigure couldn't possibly have seriously discussed the topic with all of them, Yuki dismissed the idea. He probably had brought it up to each of them a framed his answer based on their reactions. Shigure never seemed to lie, but he was a master at manipulating perception.
Maybe that was why he was considered such a good writer and story teller.
Then again, he had such a wealth of drama and fantasy in his own life maybe it all just came naturally.
Akito shifted the paperwork in his hands sharply. Yuki found is difficult to gauge Akito's quick shifts in mood. Shigure had irritated, beguiled, and flustered Akito all at once. The temperamental man was unpredictable most of the time, but this made him downright impossible to read. Yuki swallowed, watching Akito's hands. He held himself perfectly still, despite an intense desire to fidget, shift, do… something.
"I suppose," Akito said slowly, his voice slipping, lisping, through the stale air, "It would be… cruel of me to disregard the wishes of all the Juunishi." He turned and stared hard down at Yuki, "But!"
Yuki jumped, his eyes darting up to meet Akito's and were then held by the slight man's intense gaze, "We expect that you will do well there, Yuki. After all Yuki is the Rat." Akito's lips curled again into that parody of a smile lacking humor.
Shigure coughed with a clearly satisfied smile, "Well then Yuki, I suppose that means it will be alright if you come and live with me." He paused ever so briefly, "With Akito-san's approval, of course." smiling up at the stunned family head. He then turned to Yuki's clearly surprised parents, "After all, living with me will be much more convenient for going to school than the main compound. And it's not as if I'm tearing him away from his parents by requesting he live with me." The Dog smiled, his eyes happy crescents, "It's really only natural, and it will make my life so much more full to have some companionship in my home."
Yuki's eyes darted around the room, trying to take in what was happening. Akito was silent. His mother's mouth was working towards some form of protest. His father seemed an uninvolved stone. Air sat heavy in Yuki's chest and he felt his breath becoming shallow. Closing his eyes, he struggled with keeping his breath both even and quiet.
There was noise around him. Akito was speaking, his voice sharp, to Shigure, who responded calmly. His mother's voice entered, as an indecipherable sound. Yuki simply struggled to keep his hands at his sides, to keep them from reaching for his chest, or collar, or make any move to draw attention to his distress. He'd hoped Shigure would offer, but had not expected it. He choked down a gasp forcefully, breathing slowly and as evenly as he could through his nose. It would all be over soon. Yuki willed the tears away from his eyes. It would all be over soon and he would not even have a chance to make his will known, or argue for his own freedom.
Freedom from the Sohma house, as well as the Sohma school. He found his voice.
"With Akito-san's permission, Mother," He started speaking very softly. The room hushed to hear him, "I would like to accept Shigure-san's offer. It will, as he pointed out, make attending Kaibara a little easier. The move will also require me to be more independent and learn to take care of myself, both of which are necessary life skills if I am to be useful to Akito-san and the Sohma clan when I get older." Yuki found the argument formed itself. Yuki allowed a small sense of satisfaction to show. Neither his mother, nor Akito could manage a reasonable objection to that. Not that either needed one, but still. His mother sighed.
"I suppose I must agree." She said stiffly. Akito did not answer verbally, but only smiled his humorless smile.
"Very well," He turned his back on them all and returned to his birdcage near the window. "It is settled. You're dismissed."
He sat down and started out the window, refusing to look at any of them as they left. As Yuki was on his way out, Akito spoke again.
"Please do remember to visit me sometimes, Yuki. I will be lonely without you." Akito's eyes remained on the bird in his hand. Yuki stared at his cousin until Shigure put a hand to the boy's shoulder and urged him forward.
Yuki made sure his tie was straight before going downstairs. He gathered his school satchel and descended into the main living space of Shigure's house. He left his things by the door and then braved the kitchen to make tea and perhaps manage to make a decent breakfast for himself and Shigure.
Yuki kept his hands to himself as he first entered the kitchen, looking around carefully. Starting the water would be easier, so he set the kettle on the heat first. Nervously he checked over his shoulder, listening for his cousin. There was no indication that Shigure was active yet.
He took out a carton of eggs, found a pan and a pair of chopsticks. Two shallow dishes were set to the side of the stove. Yuki carefully broke the eggs and tossed the shells in the sink. He paid attention to the yolks as he broke them, stirred them up, put the mixture in the pan and lit the stove. He watched the eggs anxiously.
As Yuki shuffled the mixture every so often his mind slowed down again. He willed himself to pay attention to the eggs. Steam began to rise around the teapot and Yuki looked for clean cups, or cleanish cups. He eyed the eggs; they looked like they'd be alright for a minute. The cups needed to be rinsed. The canister with the tea was missing from its usual spot. Yuki glanced at the stove and then checked Shigure's office for the tea canister, which was sitting in the middle of the Dog's desk. Yuki returned to the kitchen and poured for tea, then checked the eggs. He'd left the eggs a little too long: they had burnt.
He mixed the eggs up again and used the chopsticks to pluck out the worst of the scorched eggs. There was bumping around from the main room. Shigure was awake and Yuki dished up the remaining eggs and took the food to the table.
Shigure lounged at the table with the paper. He looked up as Yuki entered sniffing delicately.
"Ohayo, Yuki-kun, what have we today?" Shigure studied the dish Yuki slid across the table. "Ahh! Brown eggs, why, Yuki-kun, you shouldn't have!" Shigure lightly waved his hand at his cousin. Yuki felt his head drop as he intently ate his own breakfast. Mornings had been much the same every day these last two weeks.
"Didn't we have something similar yesterday?" Shigure put aside the newspaper and began to eat as he hummed and mused on the problem. There was laughter in his voice. Yuki's head hung a little lower.
"I made toast yesterday."
"Ahh!" Shigure brightened, "That's right! Toast nicely charred on one side and white on the other." He laughed and his smile filled his face. Then Shigure tilted his head to the side and watched his cousin. Silence held for a moment.
"Yuki-kun?" Shigure spoke. His tone had changed from light and teasing. Yuki blinked as he raised his head from his supposed breakfast. Maybe he should just give up trying to eat it and stop by a convenience store on the way to school.
"Yes?"
"You don't have to try so hard, you know." Shigure said. He leaned over and rested his chin on his palm, staring across the table. Yuki blinked blankly. "You don't have to try so hard here. I appreciate that you're trying to fit yourself into my life unobtrusively, but I want to live with Yuki-kun, not a shadow. I want you to be comfortable living here with me. Just be yourself and take things at your pace. If breakfast isn't your thing, then don't try to make breakfast for us every morning. It's fine." Shigure smiled his full, playful smile and gave Yuki a 'thumbs up' before shoveling eggs into his mouth.
The Rat stared at him for a moment, continuing to sit straight and still, chopsticks in hand. Slowly the chopsticks dropped to rest on the edge of the table…. And Yuki smiled naturally, the expression reaching his eyes with a crinkle softening the corners.
Yuki looked around the main room with bleary, pre-8 am eyes. He noted dishes from the previous night on the table and a pile of papers to one side of the kitchen door. Patting his hair down Yuki managed to stumble to the dishes and collect them. He used his foot to nudge the stack of papers into the kitchen and deposited the dishes in the sink… or on the counter, he wasn't quite sure which. He'd wash them later, he promised himself.
He could hear Shigure humming in his study. That meant tea. Tea might wake him up. Picking out a clean-looking cup Yuki padded into Shigure's study. His cousin looked up.
"Ohayo, Yuki-kun!" Shigure greeted him.
Yuki mumbled and held out his cup. Shigure poured him the green tea cheerfully and watched his cousin with pursed lips and a slight smile. Yuki thumped back up stairs with his cup, presumably to change. He would come down less bleary and much more coherent.
Shigure shook his newspaper with a gesture of satisfaction and a small smile. Since Yuki had come to live with him, Shigure found he enjoyed his home more. Well, more like since their 'chat.' It had taken them some time to become accustomed to each other, but smoothness between them was established. He liked the first time Yuki came downstairs in the morning, disheveled and disoriented. It made him feel like family, the way he felt with Ayame and Hatori.
Shigure watched his cousin reemerge twenty minutes later appearing an entirely different person. He smiled.
"Ohayo, Yuki-kun."
"Ohayo." Yuki responded. He ran fingers into his hair as he scanned the main room, looking for something.
"What is it, Yuki-kun?" Yuki looked over to his cousin, a light smile on his face.
"Nothing, just looking for the book I was reading."
"Not your homework?" Shigure's thoughts were masked by a mischievous smile. He waved his pen around. "Tsk Tsk, Yuki-kun, Are you sure you're not missing homework? You should be careful with your schoolwork, and neglecting your studies for frivolous literature! I bet it's some trashy manga you're reading." Yuki knelt next to the low table and looked underneath. Since moving in he kept the front room of Shigure's home much cleaner, although that said nothing about the state of the kitchen. He pulled out his book and held it up to Shigure. The historical novel was clearly not a school book, but not drivel either.
"No. I don't leave my homework anywhere you would find it. You might ruin it while using it to torture your editor somehow."
"Yuki-kuuun!" Shigure whined, "I don't torture her! She knows I'm just being playful." He smiled brightly, irony touching his voice, "Like a big puppy." Yuki didn't respond, but sat by the door to put on his shoes.
"No breakfast?" Shigure asked.
"No point. I can't find anything in the kitchen. I'll pick up a roll or something on the way." Yuki stood up and opened the door. "Ittakimasu."
"Itterashai." Shigure responded. He leaned against the table comfortably, waiting until he could not longer hear his cousin's steps. Yes, he enjoyed having a housemate. Perhaps it was time to take on another, before things became too… dull for him again. He let the matter leave his mind. There was no need to worry over it; an opportunity would present itself. In other matters, he did have another chapter of his book to write. The most brilliant concept for it had come to him last night and it was time to commit it to paper. If he did well, he would have time to paint the Juunishi on the stones he'd gathered surreptitiously from Yuki's garden later in the week.
As he sat at his computer to write, he thought he heard a young woman's voice. No words were discernable, but he thought the voice was too feminine for Yuki. He shook his head. No one lived out this way for him to hear any woman's voice except during Mit-chan's visits. So sad, really.
And since he was inside writing, Shigure missed the first walk that would take the young high school girl past the little Sohma residence. Luckily, she also failed to notice the dwelling this time as she paid more attention to the beautiful western view of the mountains.
Likely next time she will pay more attention and notice the house. Maybe the same day there are Juunishi stones drying on the front step.