Alexa: Hey everybody. Welcome to Whose Line Is It Anyway? Tonight... He's incredibly small - Edward Elric!
Ed: I'm not short! -spazz-
Alexa: It's the bodiless boy - Alphonse Elric!
Al: -waves-
Alexa: She scares the shit outta you and me - Riza Hawkeye!
Riza: ...
Alexa: He does nothing all day long - Roy Mustang!
Roy: -smirk-
Alexa: And I'm your host Alexa! So come on down and let's have some fun! -walks down to desk and sits- Welcome, welcome... This is Whose Line Is It Anyway? The show where everything's scripted and the points do matter!
Alexa: Tonight we shall start off with... Let's Make A Date! How this game works Roy, Al, and Ed are contestants on a dating game show. But, they are each given a personality to portray. Riza will have to guess who they are and... date them! -snort-
Alexa: Ok? OK! Start when you guys are ready...
Riza: Contestant number one...
Ed: WHAT?! -grr-
Riza: ...
Ed: Whaaa! I'm sorry! Please forgive me! -begging on hands & knees-
Riza: Contestant number one, where would you take me on our first date?
Ed: A date? A Date?! You expect me to fit in a booth let alone a dress with this -points to stomach- inside me?!?
Riza: ...yes?
Ed: WELL FUCK YOU!
Riza: ... Contestant number two...
Al: -looks to his left- Eeeeee! -fan girl squee-
Riza: Same question.
Al: -stands in front of Roy- Um... excuse me... Are... -giggle fit- Are you Roy Mustang? The Roy Mustang?
Roy: -blink- -stare-
Al: Ahhhhh! -glomps Roy-
Roy: o.O -shoves-
Riza: -blinks- Contestant number three...
Roy: -poses-
Riza: Would you give me flowers or chocolate on our first date?
Roy: -new pose- Well, I'd have to say... Um, excuse me! I wasn't ready yet! -talking to camera-
Riza: Contestant number three?
Roy: What did I just tell you?! Get that fuckin' camera outta my face! -smashes camera lens-
Al: -jumping up and down- Squee!
Ed: Oh gawd! Oh gawd! -hand/stomach- Nghhh!
Riza: ...
Al: Mr. Mustang, can I have your autograph?
Roy: -mistakes Al for camera and knocks out-
Al: H- He touched me! -sigh- -faint-
Ed: Ahhh! Oh! My! God!
Alexa: -buzz- -buzz- -buzzzzzz-
Alexa: Riza, who are these people? o.O
Riza: Contestant number one, Edward, is a highly pregnant woman about to go into labor.
Alexa: Whoa! Right on the mark!
Riza: Contestant number two, Alphonse, is Roy's biggest fan.
Alexa: Well, I suppose anyone could've guessed that. And Roy...?
Riza: Contestant number three, Roy, is a professional model who is pissed off at her photographers.
Alexa: -.- uh... Correct.
Roy/Riza/Ed/Al: -take seats-
Alexa: Alrighty, Roy - 100 points! Al - 1000 points! Ed - 100 points! and Riza -pause- .2835 points. -glare-
Alexa: Hokey-poke. Next issss -drawls out s- Bartender! Al is a bartender. Roy and Ed later come in and sing their problems to Al.
Alexa: First up... Roy! Roy's problem is...
Random Audience Member: NO HOTT CHICKS!
Roy: o.o
Alexa: heheh Perfect. Oh! Before I forget... Playing the piano for us tonight is none other than... Amy Lee! (Because I can't think of anyone else who can play the piano right now. -tear-)
Amy: -walks to piano smiling and waving-
Audience: -silent-
Amy: -pout-
Angel: WAIT A SECOND! Not Amy Lee! -suddenly appears on stage-
Amy: o.O -pulled away by that monster thing in Star Wars six- -mauled- -killed- -dead-
Angel: Presenting our new pianist! Vic Mignogna!
Audience: -stands and cheers-
Vic: -walks out and sits at piano-
Alexa: Whoo, thanks Angel.
Angel: -bows and runs off stage-
Audience: -standing and cheering-
Alexa: Ok... ok...
Audience: -still standing and cheering...-
Alexa: SHUT UP! -grr-
Audience: o.o -sits and shuts up-
Alexa: n.n
Alexa: OK! Roy, Al, Vic... Start when ever you're ready...
Roy: -walks up to bar-
Al: What can I get 'cha?
Roy: -sniff-
Al: You ok?
-cue music-
Roy: -singing badly- Everywhere the girls are pregnant, or worse yet, they have facial hair. And this one important question, where? Where have all the hott chicks gone, oh where?
Roy: To be flat out honest, I really need some action. So maybe I'll go gay? My life is over, over damn it! If I need a guy to get a quick lay...
Al: -singing- I'm sorry to break the news to you, but someone knew you were coming here. They warned all the fathers before you arrived. They deported their daughters in abject fear.
Al: Bisexuality is the way to go. You could have anyone you desire. Havoc's been lusting after you for years, and you've really lit my fire. -wink and twitches hips-
Alexa: o.o O.o o.O o.o
Audience: o.o O.o o.O o.o
Vic: -stops playing piano- -grabs the magically appeared glass of water- -takes sip- -spits out like they do in the movies- o.O o.o
Roy: -blink- -takes seat-
Alexa: Um... Wow.
Al: ...
Alexa: Ed, your turn. Ed's problem is...
Audience Member: INVASION OF UDDER EXPLODING COWS!
Ed: o.o -gags-
Alexa: -rofl- Ed, start whenever you're ready...
Al: Welcome, care for a drink?
Ed: D- Does it have milk in it?
Al: Not that I know of. Why?
Ed: Well...
-cue music-
Ed: -singing- When I was a young boy, my father took me into the city, and into a store. He said son when you grow up would you be the leader of the broken, the beaten and the cows?
Ed: He said will you defeat them their udders, for they tend to explode. Because one day they'll go - Kaboom! To cover you in sticky and chunky milk.
Al: -singing- When you were a young boy, your father took you into a store and told you a story. He told you the one called "Invasion of Udder Exploding Cows."
Al: And now that you've heard it, you cower in fear. Because one day they'll explode, and cover you in sticky and chunky milk...
Alexa: -buzzzzzz-
Ed/Al: -takes seats-
Alexa: Well, that wasn't so bad... I guess...
Alexa: And once again... Vic Mignogna everybody!
Vic: -stands, bows, leaves-
Alexa: So let's see... Roy - 1008 points! Al - 1005 points! Ed - 500.2 points!
Ed: What?!
Alexa: ALRIGHT! We'll be right back, so don't go away!
Ed: -spazz- -chases Alexa-
Alexa: -hides in magically shielded well under desk-