A/N: Howdy, brosotopes (Y). Okay, so I'm not going to go in to explicit detail here, but basically, I'm just gonna get this out in the open now - this ficlet describes sexual interaction between a human and an animal; thus TW for bestiality. I can feel you all judging me, but I can explain! (If I'm still not justified by the time I finish, then YOLO). So I was reading this holmescest fic (yes, that's Sherlock/Mycroft - I'm not adverse to a cheeky bit of taboo, as you can see), and I misread this line to say that Sherlock had been expelled from one of his previous secondary schools because he'd exploited a horse, and when I started talking to a friend on Twitter about it, and we came to the conclusion that... well, I'm sure you can guess. So I told her I'd write a Sherlock/Horse fic, and this was initially going to be crack; a bit of innocent joking about it perhaps. Only a mere mention of it happening, but no. It became PWP. About Sherlock and a horse. So if this repulses you as much as I feel guilty for writing it - (which is a lot, btw) - then leave now! Otherwise, join me on this one-way ride to hell ~ ^.^
Disclaimer: The Sherlock characters belong to ACD, and in this particular incarnation, Stephen Moffat and Mark Gatiss. The.. the erm, the horse, urr, belongs *cough* to me *cough*.
"You did what?!" John spluttered
"You heard me the first time, John, and I am not going to repeat myself." Sherlock looked away and John could see the barest hint of a blush on his alabaster skin.
"I still can't believe it, you shagged a horse."John struggled to stifle the bout of giggles that were stirring, "you, Sherlock Holmes, had sexual intercourse..." John closed his eyes, finishing his sentence with a high pitched squeak "with a horse."
Sherlock's imperious sniff was enough to set John off. "And. You – oh God – you were- you were EXPELLED for it!" John gasped for breath – this, this was too much, and he felt himself getting lightheaded from all the laughter. After about a minute of looking like a dying fish in a cable knit jumper, John thought he'd finished. Sherlock – as shocking as it seems the majority of the time – was human and it couldn't have been nice having John laugh at him like that, right? He wiped the tears of mirth from his eyes with the hem of his jumper and stole a glance at Sherlock. The consulting detective was pouting with his arms crossed firmly across his chest.
"Are we quite finished now, John?"
There was silence in the flat for about a split-second whilst the pair considered each other.
"SWEET JESUS FUCKING CHRIST-" and John burst out in to another fit of giggles, tears flowing freely from his eyes.
"John. I have something to tell you. I've never told anyone else this before and I just need you to be quiet and listen."
John gulped down a mouthful of tea and set down the newspaper he was reading. Sherlock sounded fairly urgent, so he put on his best Sympathetic General Practitioner Who Cares About Your Problems face and leant forward.
"Okay, sure. Whatever it is, Sherlock, I promise not to judge you. You can tell me anything; you can tru-"
"Yes, okay, enough of your withering sentiment, John. My mind is turning to mush. Right, when I was in secondary school, I was expelled."
John frowned. This was like the time Sherlock made him race across London during the Study in Pink case to send a bloody text. Once again, blowing things ridiculously out of proportion."Um... Okay, Sherlock, I don't quite see how-"
"John, you may not be the sharpest tool in the kit, but I'd assumed you had at least something in the space between your ears; which part of "I need you to be quiet" did you not quite understand?" John mumbled something apologetic sounding, and Sherlock continued. "Okay and I was expelled because I... because I..."
Adonis was his name. He closed his eyes as threaded his fingers through his mane. It was soft and thick. He gently pulled the horses head back and he neighed in distress.
"Shhh..." Sherlock cooed, "Don't you worry – I've got you."
Sherlock gulped and he could feel his half hard cock bulging in his trousers as he bent towards Adonis's neck. As he neared, he was overwhelmed by his scent of hay and warmth and felt a spike of arousal in his stomach. Brushing his lips over the horse's neck, he moved his hands to massage the horse's upper legs and the part of its back he could reach; revelling in the feeling of its hard muscles and smooth coat. He scraped his teeth over Adonis' throat and bit down. The horse whinnied and Sherlock moaned as he sucked on the skin he'd bitten.
Sherlock was panting now, and his cock rock hard and his boxers had a growing wet patch on them from the pre-cum. He moved round to the back of the horse and hurriedly undid his belt and pulled his throbbing cock from his pants. As it sprung free, he gripped it round the base with one hand whilst his other reached round the horse to find Adonis' cock. He began to fist himself and the horse in time with each other with long, laborious strokes. When Adonis neighed with pleasure and Sherlock felt the horse's cock harden in his hand, he threw his head back with a throaty moan. He knew if he'd continued, he would have come there and then; thrusting in to his own hand.
Reaching in to his pocket, Sherlock found a packet of lube. He impatiently ripped the packet open with his teeth and coated his fingers in it. He slowly pushed a digit in to the horse's tight hole and slowly moved it around before adding a second and scissoring it open. Adonis occasionally clamped his sphincter around Sherlock's probing fingers and whinnied. Sherlock imagined how that would feel around his cock and let out another deep moan. His lower abdomen was already sticky with pre-cum as he thrust in a third finger and worked the hole. He probably could have prepared Adonis more, but Sherlock was desperate to bury himself to the hilt.
Pulling his fingers out, Sherlock found a condom in his pocket and opened the packet before sliding it on to his cock. As soon as it was on, he guided his cock to the Adonis' hole and closed his eyes as he slowly slid in. He let out a grunt. It felt so good. Adonis' hole was still quite tight and he clamped almost painfully around Sherlock. He pulled out slowly before slamming straight back in, and threw his head back. He then started thrusting erratically in to the horse, panting and moaning. When he reached round and felt the horse's engorged cock, he thrust even harder and brought the pace up; fisting Adonis in time with each thrust. With a final groan, Sherlock came hard; the horse not long after. When his heartbeat settled, Sherlock slowly slid out gripping the base of the condom. He tied up the condom and threw it at a hay bale in the stable. His hand was wet and with the horse's cum, and he slowly licked it off.
"You're a good boy, Adonis."