Who Knew? Another Slayers Fairy Tale
Xellos: Where are you going?
C.G.: I have to get the 2nd volume of Kenshin. I love it.
Xellos: It's Sunday, the mall closes in 20 minutes.
C.G.: Damn!
Xellos: Get it tomorrow.
C.G.: ::groan:: Well I guess it's fairy tale time.
Xellos: It's not a scary one, is it?
C.G.: Yeah, a little.
Xellos: Keep writing.
C.G.: This one's sort of different.
Xellos: Huge group orgy scene?
C.G.: No.
Xellos: Why is that?
C.G.: B/c I don't like doing porn for free.
Xellos: I see. ::giggle::
C.G.: Ok, this is a fairly common one: The Pied Piper of Hamelin.
Xellos: Oh, boy. What is your twisted little mind thinking up now? Once upon a time…
C.G.: Anyway, two traveling mercenaries/troublemakers look at the great and powerful kingdom of Zoana from a distance.
Lina: I'm so hungry. I hope they have good food here.
Gourry: Any food is fine by me.
C.G.: As they walked through the gates, they noticed all the townspeople were all gloomy.
Lina: This is funny.
Gourry: I wonder what's wrong?
Lina: Hey! What's going on around here?
Person: Oh, well we're going through a plague right now.
Lina: ::sweatdrop:: Plague? What kind of plague?
Person: We didn't see this coming. They weren't a problem at first. They multiplied and are destroying everything. We hardly have any food left.
Lina: FOOD??? Grrr… We'll put a stop to this! Uh…what's causing all this trouble, anyway?
Person: Don't you see them?
Lina: Huh?
C.G.: Lina's face now has a horrified expression as she sees that the plague is thousands and thousands of golden slugs.
Lina: ::screams:: HELP!!!!! ::runs the hell out of the kingdom::
Gourry: LINA!!! HEY, LINA!!!!
Person: We don't know how to get rid of them. There's a big reward going for the extermination of these slugs. I think 5,000 gold pieces.
Gourry: ::smiles:: Really?
Person: Yes, just go to the castle and ask for the job. Everyone else has failed.
C.G.: Gourry heads towards the castle.
Gourry: ::thinking:: Heh. Oh wow, 5,000 gold pieces for this easy job. Lina will be so happy with me and we can eat all we want and buy really cool things…
C.G.: So Gourry enters the castle where the king, his daughter, and the whole council gladly welcome him.
Moros: Oh, so you think you can get rid of them? Good! Come back here when you do. I hope you don't fail like the others.
Martina: Go and get rid of those slimy and icky things! We'll give you 50,000 gold pieces if you do. ::laughs::
Gourry: ::sweatdrop:: Whoa… It's late now but I know there won't be any slugs here tomorrow morning.
C.G.: So Gourry leaves and goes to the center of the kingdom. He pulls out his ocarina and starts playing like his brother taught him. All the slugs came out of everywhere, hypnotized by the music. They follow Gourry through the streets all day until he is sure all the slugs heard the song. Gourry then leads the slugs out of the kingdom and to the river knowing Lina is just going to ask him to kill them later anyway.
Gourry: Piece of cake. Mmmmm… ::drools:: I'm so hungry.
C.G.: The people of Zoana wake up and realize that there were no slugs anywhere. The whole kingdom celebrated, and so did the castle until Gourry showed up for his payment.
Martina: I only said that because I didn't think you
could do it.
Gourry: I don't care about that. I'll take 5,000 gold pieces. I really don't want Lina with 50,000 gold pieces, she gets that scary look in eye when she thinks about that much money.
Moros: Well, I think 5,000 gold pieces sounds reasonable.
Martina: Grrr… Father, shut up!
Moros: Yes, dear.
Martina: Look here blondie, you're getting 50 and that's it! The slugs are all dead now, they're not a problem anymore. Take it and leave or I'll have you arrested!
Gourry: You know, Lina's not going to be too happy when she hears about this.
Martina: Like I care about your stupid girlfriend.
C.G.: Gourry stared at her with rage in his eyes.
Gourry: You'll regret breaking your promise to me. I guarantee it. ::leaves::
Moros: ::cries:: Martina, I think the 5,000 was reasonable.
Martina: Father! Look how much money we saved.
Moros: But we can afford it! ::sweatdrop:: And I believe what he says.
Martina: ::laughs:: What can a mere traveling mercenary do?
C.G.: Two days past. After dinner Martina goes upstairs and hears noises outside.
Martina: What? Where are all our people going? FATHER!!!
Moros: What is it, Martina?
Martina: Look outside. The people are leaving the kingdom. That jerk is taking our people.
Moros: Oh no! Maybe if we give him the money now, we'll get them back.
Martina: Oh father, that's exactly what he wants us to think. They'll come back as soon as he stops playing his stupid ocarina.
C.G.: An hour passes…
Moros: He's still holding out. Let's give him the…
Martina: FATHER!!!!
C.G.: She then sees a figure walk the streets. The figure stops and looks up at the castle.
Martina: Who's that?
C.G.: The figure raises her hands and starts to chant.
Martina: What's going on?
Lady: DRAGON SLAVE!!!!!!!
BOOM
Xellos: I know the moral of that story: Don't ever %$#@ with a guy with a very powerful girlfriend. ::giggle::
Xellos: Where are you going?
C.G.: I have to get the 2nd volume of Kenshin. I love it.
Xellos: It's Sunday, the mall closes in 20 minutes.
C.G.: Damn!
Xellos: Get it tomorrow.
C.G.: ::groan:: Well I guess it's fairy tale time.
Xellos: It's not a scary one, is it?
C.G.: Yeah, a little.
Xellos: Keep writing.
C.G.: This one's sort of different.
Xellos: Huge group orgy scene?
C.G.: No.
Xellos: Why is that?
C.G.: B/c I don't like doing porn for free.
Xellos: I see. ::giggle::
C.G.: Ok, this is a fairly common one: The Pied Piper of Hamelin.
Xellos: Oh, boy. What is your twisted little mind thinking up now? Once upon a time…
C.G.: Anyway, two traveling mercenaries/troublemakers look at the great and powerful kingdom of Zoana from a distance.
Lina: I'm so hungry. I hope they have good food here.
Gourry: Any food is fine by me.
C.G.: As they walked through the gates, they noticed all the townspeople were all gloomy.
Lina: This is funny.
Gourry: I wonder what's wrong?
Lina: Hey! What's going on around here?
Person: Oh, well we're going through a plague right now.
Lina: ::sweatdrop:: Plague? What kind of plague?
Person: We didn't see this coming. They weren't a problem at first. They multiplied and are destroying everything. We hardly have any food left.
Lina: FOOD??? Grrr… We'll put a stop to this! Uh…what's causing all this trouble, anyway?
Person: Don't you see them?
Lina: Huh?
C.G.: Lina's face now has a horrified expression as she sees that the plague is thousands and thousands of golden slugs.
Lina: ::screams:: HELP!!!!! ::runs the hell out of the kingdom::
Gourry: LINA!!! HEY, LINA!!!!
Person: We don't know how to get rid of them. There's a big reward going for the extermination of these slugs. I think 5,000 gold pieces.
Gourry: ::smiles:: Really?
Person: Yes, just go to the castle and ask for the job. Everyone else has failed.
C.G.: Gourry heads towards the castle.
Gourry: ::thinking:: Heh. Oh wow, 5,000 gold pieces for this easy job. Lina will be so happy with me and we can eat all we want and buy really cool things…
C.G.: So Gourry enters the castle where the king, his daughter, and the whole council gladly welcome him.
Moros: Oh, so you think you can get rid of them? Good! Come back here when you do. I hope you don't fail like the others.
Martina: Go and get rid of those slimy and icky things! We'll give you 50,000 gold pieces if you do. ::laughs::
Gourry: ::sweatdrop:: Whoa… It's late now but I know there won't be any slugs here tomorrow morning.
C.G.: So Gourry leaves and goes to the center of the kingdom. He pulls out his ocarina and starts playing like his brother taught him. All the slugs came out of everywhere, hypnotized by the music. They follow Gourry through the streets all day until he is sure all the slugs heard the song. Gourry then leads the slugs out of the kingdom and to the river knowing Lina is just going to ask him to kill them later anyway.
Gourry: Piece of cake. Mmmmm… ::drools:: I'm so hungry.
C.G.: The people of Zoana wake up and realize that there were no slugs anywhere. The whole kingdom celebrated, and so did the castle until Gourry showed up for his payment.
Martina: I only said that because I didn't think you
could do it.
Gourry: I don't care about that. I'll take 5,000 gold pieces. I really don't want Lina with 50,000 gold pieces, she gets that scary look in eye when she thinks about that much money.
Moros: Well, I think 5,000 gold pieces sounds reasonable.
Martina: Grrr… Father, shut up!
Moros: Yes, dear.
Martina: Look here blondie, you're getting 50 and that's it! The slugs are all dead now, they're not a problem anymore. Take it and leave or I'll have you arrested!
Gourry: You know, Lina's not going to be too happy when she hears about this.
Martina: Like I care about your stupid girlfriend.
C.G.: Gourry stared at her with rage in his eyes.
Gourry: You'll regret breaking your promise to me. I guarantee it. ::leaves::
Moros: ::cries:: Martina, I think the 5,000 was reasonable.
Martina: Father! Look how much money we saved.
Moros: But we can afford it! ::sweatdrop:: And I believe what he says.
Martina: ::laughs:: What can a mere traveling mercenary do?
C.G.: Two days past. After dinner Martina goes upstairs and hears noises outside.
Martina: What? Where are all our people going? FATHER!!!
Moros: What is it, Martina?
Martina: Look outside. The people are leaving the kingdom. That jerk is taking our people.
Moros: Oh no! Maybe if we give him the money now, we'll get them back.
Martina: Oh father, that's exactly what he wants us to think. They'll come back as soon as he stops playing his stupid ocarina.
C.G.: An hour passes…
Moros: He's still holding out. Let's give him the…
Martina: FATHER!!!!
C.G.: She then sees a figure walk the streets. The figure stops and looks up at the castle.
Martina: Who's that?
C.G.: The figure raises her hands and starts to chant.
Martina: What's going on?
Lady: DRAGON SLAVE!!!!!!!
BOOM
Xellos: I know the moral of that story: Don't ever %$#@ with a guy with a very powerful girlfriend. ::giggle::