Title: Are You Here
Author: Jayta
Rating: G
Show: One Tree Hill
Genre: Drama
Pairing: Peyton/Jake
Are You Here
"Jake."
Her heart pounded as his name passed her lips. Where had he come from? It was like a dream. He couldn't possibly be standing here, in the cold glow of the streetlight.
"I didn't know you were hosting a party." Peyton glanced up to see Rick shifting uneasily, pocketing the little white baggie. It was the first time she had seen him caught off balance. "I would suggest you get rid of him," he whispered into her ear as if they were somehow linked intimately. "Or what you need is gone."
"She doesn't need what you have to offer."
Peyton bit her bottom lip, her gaze meeting the ghostly vision in front of her, not wanting to blink for fear that it was just that...a vision. Swallowing hard, took a step forward, reaching for him. "Are you really here?"
The tall teenager she had kissed goodbye last summer did not answer. Instead he seemed intensely focused on her enabler - the man who had pulled her into a dark place she had found comfort in amidst the turmoil in her life. "You can take off." His tone was rigid and almost menacing. It surprised her.
Part of her couldn't help but feel a change within the now spiky-haired single father.
"Hey, I didn't know there was some prior claim, buddy." Rick raised his hands in surrender, backing off with a slight smirk on his face. "Take it easy," he chuckled. "You can have her. She's nothing to me"
The words summed up their relationship perfectly. It now struck her how easily Rick could throw her away, as to look at her. Peyton narrowed her eyes at the scumbag she had fooled herself into believing she needed.
"But you've always got my number, right blondie?" Rick winked at her and strode back into the shadows of the empty street. "They always come back," he called out tauntingly. "And you're no different."
A shiver ran down her spine as she stood face to face with Jake, who was staring intently at her. She wasn't sure what he was thinking. Peyton imagined it was disgust - disgust or pity. Either one made her stomach churn.
"What are you doing here?" he asked gravely.
The question was simple enough. Peyton even had a reasonable answer; at least according to Haley, Brooke, and Anna. But when she heard the words from his lips, she did not feel the concern that was behind them. Instead she felt anger and resentment. And the next words she uttered seemed to come out of nowhere. "I didn't know you cared."
Every part of her wanted to throw her arms around his neck and feel his strong arms holding her. When she saw him walking from beneath the shadows, her first instinct was to run to him and tell him everything she was feeling and going through.
But here she stood, still alone, and for the life of her, angry.
"I think I asked first," Jake answered quietly.
He hadn't reacted. He didn't seem wounded by her accusation. He just stood there, waiting for an answer.
"I was alone." Those were the only words of explanation she could bring herself to say. Stuffing her hands in her jacket, she took a step back, and leaned against her car - unable to meet his questioning gaze.
"I'm sorry."
The two simple words cut her more than any words of condemnation could.
"I couldn't find my way out," Peyton whispered, as she felt her throat close as her emotions surfaced quickly. "There was...it was just too..." Shaking her head she slid down against the car, as if the weight of her mother's absence, the spray-painted accusation of her sexual preference, Brooke's absence in leave of Felix, and the departure of the boy standing in front of her was just too much to bear any longer.
Suddenly the tears welled up inside of her and she could not longer hold back the tears. The sobs seemed distant - not her own - as she sat in the dampness of the wet street. Peyton pressed both her hands against her lips, trying to muffle the wordless agony that filled her very being.
"Oh Peyton."
She heard the heartbreak in his voice, almost matching her own. This only made her pain worse. She had longed to hear that concern and understanding weeks and months ago. Just a quick hello or even 'I miss you, too'. But there was nothing. She had nothing, not until Rick gave her something to hang onto. And now here she sat, in the dark streets of Tree Hill, her body craving the white powdered numbness that she had always imagined she loathed.
This isn't who she was. This was never who she was.
"Let me take you home." Jake's quiet unassuming voice interrupted the silent accusations that spun around like a merry-go-round in her head. His strong hands lifted her up, until she was standing on her own two feet.
Peyton looked up at Jake, whose blank expression was now filled with concern. "I emailed you," she whispered. "I tried to tell you..."
"I know."
"Then w-why didn't you..." She swallowed back the tears that were choking her. "Why didn't you answer me?" she asked, not understanding why he had never replied to her emails. "I needed you. I just needed to hear from you."
He reached up and wiped away the new tears that had begun to brim over. The wordless gesture only confused her more. She knew he cared about her. This guy, who had accepted her for who she was, did care for her. She knew that.
So why had he kept silent?
"Why do you think I'm here?" he whispered gently and slipped his arms around her. "Why do you think I'm here."
Peyton closed her eyes as she fell against him. No more anger or resentment. He was here; he was holding her in his arms.
He had come back for her.