After Noah turned off the live stream, Firebrand simply shut down his computer, turning away from the black screen with a relaxed smile on his badly burned face. He chuckled slightly, shaking his head. His younger self could be so fucking stupid sometimes.
"Sobbing n' shit over thinking he was going to die. What a baby. I mean, we die around here all the time. I mean, not fully, since it's impossible to die in this realm."
He shrugged, licking up a side of paper and rolling up some pot into it before rolling it back up and lighting it up with a long inhale. He coughed and laughed afterwards, a high smile on his face as he sat there and spoke to himself.
"I wonder what the fuck is in the kitchen." Firebrand chuckled getting his ass up and wandering over to one side of the fourth dimension
Oh wait... there was no kitchen because proxies don't eat. Woops... so he wanders over to a quite decative looking proxy with weird ass wiggly hair and thick framed glasses. "Hey, so um.. how you doin'?" Firebrand smirked elbowing the other proxy with a high derpy smile. "Firebrandgetthefuckawayfromm e..." A familiar voice growled not affecting him at all
"Wait... what?.. hey Obser-what the fuck your name is. Do you know where I can get some uh..." He takes another hit laughing. "Oh hey, you want some?" The stoned as fuck proxy asked sticking the blunt in his glasses. "...Getthefuckoutwhatisyour-" Was the only words what's his name could say before Firebrand put his hand over the other's big mouth. "I don't want your drama so just chill the fuck out." He smiled before walking away.
As Firebrand walked away he decided that there was nothing better to do than wander off into Noah's YouTube videos. that's what everyone else here did for fun. Though, he supposed he should have himself for his own well-being.
Firebrand smiled and turned on his computer before slapping the screen and realizing that's not how it's done. "Oh, wait-" Firebrand thought long and hard for a moment, smoke billowing around him as he laughed quietly.
"...Dude..."
After about half an hour of sitting there, the proxy remembered what he had to do. He slipping into the computer without thinking and ended up in the middle of one of Noah's videos.
"Oh, fuck, man. I guess I get to leave little messages for his ass so he can live and stuff...",He muttered before freezing the video and leaving a high smile for his former self with the message "GET YOUR SHIT TOGETEHER" imprinted on the screen as he laughed.
Alright, now time for business.
He heaved himself out of the teleportation trick an into Noah's room, and realized whenever he was in this realm, his appearance changed into Noah, with a video camera permanently fixed in his hands.
He just laughed hysterically.
"FUCK, who's there?!"
Firebrand looked up as he heard Noah's voice and froze, not sure what to do. He took another hit, his eyes wide as he tried not to laugh, pointing his useless camera at the door.
Noah was tripping the fuck out from what it looked like and he smiled pointing the camera directly in his face. "Heeeey, look you're on my camera." Firebrand smiled hitting Noah in his big nose with the camera. "Ha ha woops sorry bro." He smirked just standing there all high and stuff
"WHAT THE FUCK" The other man screamed backing away. "What the fuck are you so freaked out about? is there someone behind me?..." Firebrand asked turning around and laughing
"You're really fucking weird dude..." He smiled walking past Noah. "Wait-where the fuck do you think you're going?!" He yelled grabbing Firebrand by the shoulder. "...Are you trying to hit me?" The stoned mother fucker asked turning around. "Because like, I don't do violence man... you need a hug?" He chuckled hugging his self. "FDFGSK LET ME GO!" Noah screamed trying to push him away. "Feel the love you little fuck..." Firebrand laughed before letting him go and leaving his room
"This is my fucking house! come back here you ass!" He yelled chasing after the quite slow proxy who was making his way up his hallway.
"Hey um... do you have a kitchen I can borrow?" Firebrand grinned looking around his house. "...No, now get out." Noah grabbed him by the arm roughly.. man, I just noticed he is sooo violent. Like, why can't he just chill the fuck out?
"You ungrateful fuck, in exchange for saving you, all I want is a sandwich or a pudding cup or some shit." Firebrand laughed, wheezing as he muttered slowly to himself, "But I saved me for a pudding cup."
Noah glared at him and sat down refusing to get him anything. "No you can go fuck yourself!" He yelled as Firebrand made his way into the kitchen digging through his pantries, sadly not finding anything so far
"What is this?... no pudding? tsk tsk Noah..." Firebrand chuckled opening his fridge and gathering every little thing he could find in there
"Then I guess I'll make a cake then since you don't have any fucking bread." He smiled as Noah stared at him. "What are you talking about? there is some bread! you just are too fucking stupid to see that..." He growled getting up and going back over to pull him out of his kitchen.. well their kitchen
"No man, it's all goood. I'll share some of it with you." Firebrand grinned taking out a bowl and pouring in mustard and eggs first into it. "...Are you fucking kidding me? what are you doing? that's not how you make a fucking cake." Noah yelled feeling very annoyed with himself. "Whoa dude, I don't tell you how to live your life okay?" Firebrand turned to him poking his nose.
"Boop!" Firebrand spoke with a solemn tone, before turning to gather more materials. He became distracted, however and threw a little pot into the stove, laughing when it lit on fire.
"Ahw, bro. You're stove is fucking magnificent.", Firebrand giggled, smelling the air.
"I can't fucking believe I am seeing this..." Noah stood by in disgust laughing to himself. "Hey, do you have any steak sauce?" Firebrand asked with a chuckle. "...You already put mustard in it. Why in the fuck would you need steak sauce? it's already ruined." Noah sighed running his fingers through his hair as he pointed the camera at him
"Hey hey hey now, the mustard adds zest. The steak sauce gives it spice." Firebrand winked finding a small bottle of some in the various other objects he found in his fridge. "Wow um okay..." Noah muttered under his breath
Firebrand then proceeded to add the steak sauce. And then took a whole bag of flour, pouring the whole thing in the bowl and even getting it on himself. "...So do you think this is enough?" Firebrand laughed touching the white powdery substance all over himself.
Noah grimaced at the proxy version of himself and shook his head. "I think. You've done. more than enough." He said, trying ot calm down, but seeing yourself from the future being a dumbass is weird.
"P-P-P-Poker face Pah-Pah-Pokerface! Fah, fah fah fahhh~" Firebrand momentarily looked around for something to add this magnificent cake. "...You know what this needs? some chicken." He smiled taking a wing and throwing it into the vast ammount of flour. "That's not even cooked... I doubt it will even bake right." Noah sighed angrily. "So will you help me stir this?" Firebrand asked with a grin
Noah took a deep heavily stressed breath before responding. "NO. STOP." he took the pot of crap and threw it into the stove angrilly. "Get out. i know you're me, and I know you helped me, but I can't take this right now. i need you to fucking leave right now."
Firebrand tuned noah out after he said no, and was just smiling at the flailing angry motherfucker. Woah, this guy could flip. "C'mon, Jesus. you threw that shit in there without even fuckin' stirring. Get your head in the game." He laughed loudly. "Not like basketball though, 'cause that shit's kinda lame. but if people like it then that's their personal choice and i ain't gotta grudge." He smiled contentedly.
Noah growled and grabbed Firebrand pulling him away. "Whoa what the fuck?... just calm the fuck down." He smiled pushing him away lazily. "This cake isn't even nearly fucking done, so you're going to have to wait."
He smiled opening the oven and splashing the whole thing with pickle juice. "There, now it won't be so dry." He smiled going over to his living room and sitting down. "NO. I JUST WANT YOU OUT OF MY FUCKING HOUSE!" Noah yelled going to hit at him, only to be pulled into another hug
"You know, you're fucking hilarious." He snorts laughing giving him a little kiss on the cheek, because kisses make everything better.
"AGH!" Noah cried out, plauged with the kiss of a proxy. "What the FUCK?!-"
"Shhhhhhhh...",Firebrand cooed,"Shush lil' guy. Your shit will be done soon, so shhhh..." He pet Noah's hair, staring at the television that wasn't even turned on with a big smile on his face, casually locking Noah in a chokehold as he thrashed around under his arm.
"Man, it's so weird, you're like me, but you are so not me... heh... fuck."
Noah struggled and hit at him. "LET ME GO. LET ME GO RIGHT. FUCKING. NOW!" He screamed coughing, hoping that'd he'd let go of him
"It's okay bro, I know you can't wait for that cake but neither can I. So we're just going to have to be patient or whatever the fuck you call it." Firebrand grinned bending down and nuzzling Noah. "ASFNDKSF I CAN GIVE A FUCK ABOUT THAT" Noah yelled hitting at his arms
"Would you stop screaming? it's kind of loud and you need to just chill out." Firebrand grinned hugging him once more only to be hit in the face. "You want to fucking go?!" He yelled removing himself from the proxy's embrace. "...Where?" Firebrand laughed, completely unaware that Noah hit him.
Noah ran his hand through his fluffy hair and gripped it as if he was stressed to the point of no return. "Where. Do you fucking think?" He seethed, before Firebrand shrugged. "I have no idea. I came here 'cause I was bored."
He chuckled before getting up and ruffling his other self's hair. "C'mere, look at this." He walked over to Noah's computer and typed up on Noah's twitter.
'chillin with myself i guess holy fuck the room os spining did i leave the oven on oh yeah the cake. ~F.'
He nodded at the status with a satisfied grin before submitting it and smiling up at Noah, who was practically foaming at the mouth.
"WHAT THE FUCK, YOU'RE NOT HELPING."
"Yeah I am. I'm helping you by not being so lonely." He smiled patting his self on the head before leaving to check on the cake. "Well I don't fucking need you here. and I'm starting to think you're worse than Observer." Noah sighed turning around and rubbing his face with a hand
"Wait.. Is that the guy with the wiggly hair and big ass teeth?" Firebrand asked remembering the proxy he'd seen before he came here. "...What the fuck are you talking about?" He asked glaring back at him. "Observerer." Firebrand grinned before taking a hit out of nowhere
"Sure what the fuck ev- wait a second. What the fuck is THAT?" Noah gritted his teeth in an angry tone, before walking over to take whatever he had out of his hands. "Heh, this is some weed." Firebrand grinned holding the blunt above his head so he couldn't get it.
Noah slapped his forehead. "We're the same height, Just gimme that- Hey, look over there!" Noah pointed and Firebrand turned slowly to look.
"Well, I don't fucking see anythi- Hey."
Noah had snatched the blunt out of his had and ran away to go flush it down the toilet. "WE HAVE THE SAME BODY, IF YOU ARE DOING THAT HOW AM I SUPPOSSED TO BE FIGHTING THE OTHER FUCKING TEN MILLION PROXIES AND THAT THING?"
Firebrand just walked after him walking to the bathroom door and stood in the doorway. "I wouldn't do that if I were you." Firebrand grinned crossing his arms.
"Oh yeah? or what will you do?" Noah smirked holding it above the water. "Well um.. I'll turn into a mega asshole like you." Firebrand smiled walking over to him snatching it back out of his hands and patting him on the head.
Noah scowled, "Excuse me? I have no friend left who are alive, I'm being stalked by an eldritch being and his legion of killer psychos with shitty typing, my future self burns my face off with A BLUNT and I was almost MURDERD. EXCUSE ME IF I'M A LITTLE IRRITABLE." he snapped and smacked the joint of of his hands.
Firebrand stared down blankly at the ground and picked up whatever was left of it lighting it up. "Well what about what's her name.. Kevin? wait... Kevin's a woman right? my memory is all over the place." He chuckles coughing a bit.
Noah shook his head. "Yeah his name's Kevin, what the fuck kind of name is Kevin for a girl? Get that shit out of your hand or I swear to god I will hurt me. FUCK, STOP SMOKING THAT SHIT."
He laughs and pats his younger self's head. "Well how was I supposed to know? there was always something weird about him." Firebrand responded blowing a puff of smoke in his face "So you still have "friends" you ungrateful fuck." He grins turning away from him to go back to the living room
"NO. YOU KNOW WHAT? FUCK YOU! YOU'RE NO BETTER THAN ME." Noah yelled feeling frustrated with him now. "That's alright. Because no one is." Firebrand smiled as he sat down waiting for his other self to come sit by him.
After Noah refused to sit down, firebrand sprawled out on the couch, stretching his body out and chuckling. "You see, all that bullshit they say about humns not being able to see? How they're helpless and need to see the light or whatever? I think that means something different to each of us. like, for Observer, it probably means you can see who your true self is and that you can be better than everybody. Heh. That's not me, though. I think that what we all need to see is that we're all fucking beautiful and that whatever happens doesn't even matter so long as your chill as fuck. Ya' know?"
He looked up at Noah, who was just looking at Firebrand like he was the dumbest shit in the world."...What the fuck are you even talking about?"
Firebrand shrugged, snickering. "HA! I don't even fucking know!" he rolled off the couch and Noah sighed, giving up any sense and sitting down, propping his feet up on firebrand's belly. "Just stop. Please."
He chuckled squirming on the floor. "That tickles!" Firebrand laughed as Noah sighed. "You're really fucking hopeless aren't you?..." He sighed staring down at the high as fuck proxy. "Whatever you say." Firebrand responds nuzzling his legs. "...Just fucking stop." Noah frowned getting up before smelling something burning
"Uh Firebrand... I think your cake is burning." Noah said noticing Firebrand suddenly passed out on his floor. "...You've got to be fucking kidding me." Noah faceplamed walking over to his kitchen and grabbing a towel. "Ugh I hope I don't burn myself..." He thinks to himself taking the "cake" out of the oven
"Hey, Firebrand. Wake the fuck up! your damn cake is done." Noah yells to Firebrand walking over to his couch.
Noah stared at the horrid confection and all of it's yellow and burnt coloring. He scowled at Firebrand, who was still laying on the floor. "Hey. I'm not afraid to kick a proxy." He warned.
Firebrand rolled over slightly and groaned getting up. "Oh, hey Noah. How did you get here?" He grinned walking over to him. "...What the fuck? um I should be fucking asking you that." Noah said staring at him disbelief. "Whoa man, what in the ever loving fuck is this magnificent creation you have over here?" Firebrand marveled staring at the "cake" he had made a few hours ago. "Are you serious? that's the damn fucking cake you made insisted on..." Noah scowled. "Th-This is so fucking amazing!" Firebrand exclaimed tearing up for some really weird reason. "Oh man... I just want to fucking kiss you for helping me make this." Firebrand chuckled walking over to Noah with his arms open. "What?! no fucking way." Noah growled running back to his bedroom.
Firebrand smiled and swagged towards his room, seemingly too happy to care about much else. "Come on, you little fuck, come here." He said, his arms out towards his other self as he heard Noah barricading the other side. He just laughed.
"Bro, you know what? That's a good idea. Don't want anybody invading in our privacy!" He nodded, teleporting inside Noah's room so he was standing right behind him.
As Noah felt static within the room and something pressing against his back, he panicked. "Fuc-!"
He was interrupted in his scream by Firebrand's arms surrounding Noah in a hug and nuzzling into his neck. "You're fucking awesome, Noah. you know that."
Noah struggled and thrashed about, but Firebrand didn't care. Because even if his younger self was an angry little fuck, he knew this was his way of letting him know he loved him... or something like that
"Please I've had more than a fucking enough of you! just leave my house and leave me the fuck alone!" Noah was screaming now placing his hands on Firebrand's chest as he tried to push him away. "You know what? I love you too." Firebrand grinned of course misinterpreting what he had said
"I don't love you! you can go fuc-" Noah was cut off by himself who had decided to kiss him.
Firebrand' eyes were open as he kissed Noah, his arms keeping him close. Noah just froze for a moment, his eyes wide. Firebrand paused, smiling into their actions and broke the kiss with a light nuzzle. "See man, you just gotta settle and things will be fine." Firebrand ruffled his hair once. "The end is beautiful. Just wait for it to come." He nodded once at the flabbergasted Noah and chuckled at their silence.
Noah was silent for a few more moments before Firebrand shook him a little. "Hey, you alright?" Firebrand asked quietly poking his nose. Noah was still silent before he crawled away from him to the other side of his room. "Aw bro, you didn't even tell me if I was a better kisser than Observer yet." Firebrand laughed to himself
"Please.. go..." Were the only words that Noah could mutter. "Why? I'm not going any fucking where. I want to stay here with you." Firebrand smiled crawling over to Noah who was huddled into a corner hugging him. "We need each other, and you obviously can't do anything without me." Firebrand spoke patting his other self's back.
Noah looked up from his shroud of self-pity and looked angrilly at Firebrand, seeming only moreso irritated by Firebrand's constant smile. "You don't fucking GET IT. You ARE me! Why the fuck would you do that?"
Firebrand chuckled,"Do what, man?"
Noah stood up, moving across the room to put distance between the two of them. "Fucking- Kiss me!" He yelled at the proxy, hurt on his features.
"But I just did, ungrateful fuck." Firebrand laughed, patting the spot on the floor next to him. "Though I guess if you want, then you can just come sit over here again. Unless you wanna play tag or some shit?"
"NO! I'm done with your fucking mind games! do you enjoy seeing me like this?!" Noah yelled pacing around angrily. "Enjoy seeing you like what? well, if you're talking about whatever the fuck you're doing no. But if you sit by me and just chill out I would enjoy that." Firebrand smiled, his pinhole eyes and wide grin glowing in the darkness. "Well guess fucking what?... not happening.." Noah frowned plopping back down on the floor with his arms crossed.
Firebrand only smiled at this and crawled back over to him pressing the other's back into the wall behind him. "You are such an ungrateful little fuck. But that's okay man. I love you either way and I -know- you feel the same way somewhere in there." Firebrand chuckled poking Noah's chest... or, more like his nipple.
"...Fucking stop." He growled moving his finger away. "No, I will love you until all your anger goes away." Firebrand grinned before kissing him again.
Noah felt Firebrand's hand press him lightly against the wall as he deeped the kiss, a smile still on his face and he threaded his hand through Noah's hair. Noah thought about fighting him away, but it honestly felt like forever since he recieved any ounce of affection from anybody.
Firebrand noticed the other's lack of resistance and moved his arms around the human, holding him close as they kissed and was honestly surprised as Noah began to hesitantly kiss him in return. Firebrand rubbed his back in small little cirlces, trying to help noah calm down fully.
After a moment, they slowly broke their kiss, Noah looking downwards and firebrand just smiling at him calmly.
"...I wouldn't hurt you. I'm here to save you... it's like I said before: I am you're best friend."
Noah took a deep shaky breath, still not making eye contact as he looked away towards the floor. He nodded a little, however, and stayed within Firebrand's arms.
Firebrand smiled and kept a hand on Noah's face caressing him softly. "See? this isn't so bad though." He smiled kissing his cheek. "...I guess not." Noah frowned blushing and keeping his head down. "Heh.. that's alright. I knew you liked it anyway." Firebrand chuckled nuzzling his nose
"But weren't we baking a fucking cake?... nah, I guess it can wait a few more minutes." He winked pressing Noah back into the wall behind him. "I can mother fucking do this all day." Firebrand laughed to himself, placing himself on Noah's lap.
Noah felt heat in his face as Firebrand casually stradled his waist, smiling happily as he nuzzled the side of Noah's neck.
"What are you doing- Ah!" Noah gasped slightly as Firebrand bit in between his neck and shoulder, making Firebrand chuckle at him. Noah squirmed slightly, his face red as the proxy moved his hands across Noah's body, igniting little sparks all throughout his senses. "F-Fuck... Firebrand, I can't-"
As Noah protested, Firebrand just chuckled lowly and licked where he had bitten, moving his hips slightly into Noah's as he leaned back to smile at him. "Can't what?"
Firebrands hand moved lower on Noah's stomache and touched along the hem of his jeans, creeping slowly to tease Noah, who made a small noise in return. "-Can't do this.." Noah placed his hand on Firebrands, but didn't move them as Firebrand began to unbutton his pants and slip them off of the other man.
As he began to tug them off, he licked up Noah's neck and nipped at the jawline, and nibbled lightly on his ear before he whispered seductivly: "Eat my clementines..."
Firebrand then ripped off Noah's pants and laughed manicallly as he ran towards the door, slammed into the barricade and was sent sprawling to the floor, where he decided to teleport,"LOLOLOLOLOLO-"
And he was gone.