One Hot Day in Stormalong
Chapter 1: Sweat
K'nuckles x Bubbie / K'nubbie
One steaming hot summer day on the dock town known as Stormalong Harbor, a huge blue whale bobbed to and fro in the sea under the dock. The dock itself stank and was sizzling from the extreme heat cast down upon it. Many of Stormalong's residents trudged along, with their feet oozing out from their melting shoes. Putrid sweat poured down their bodies like miniature waterfalls. Any stray hairs that hung out from their skin shriveled in the sunlight, only to be replenished by the sweaty downpour, and then shrivel up again in an endless cycle. People's eyes hung out from their faces as they tried their hardest to escape the sun's deadly gaze.
Down under the dock, the blue whale sat in the shadow of the town above. The shade was helpful against the sun's beams, but the heat was still intolerable. The whale itself was made up of a massive smooth head with a blowhole on top and a small tail protruding from the back. In the front was a small face with two nubs considered to be her flippers. Her eyes were absolutely gorgeous with luscious eyelashes protruding from the sides. The eyes were encased in wrinkled, slightly brown, barnacle-covered eyelids, but the eyeballs themselves offset this. They glittered and shined as if relishing in their own magnificence. Bubbie was attractive for a cetacean. Unfortunately, today was not the best day, with the heat stealing away her beauty by drying her spotted skin and causing her eyes to tear up (although seeing her eyes tear up was pretty hot). Cracks crawled up and down her skin from the intense heat and she breathed heavily in the sun's intensity. Suddenly, a barking command erupts from within her huge heaving mouth, "Shut yer trap, whale! Yer lettin' all the heat in!" The voice is gruff and manly; surely this voice doesn't belong to such a beautiful sea mammal?
Through Bubbie's cloud of hot breath, past her yellowed teeth, and into the red yonic mouth, a dirty blue pirate sits atop her tongue with a young boy to his side. This pirate, Captain K'nuckles is the creator of such harsh language. Ingrown hairs adorn everywhere on his body besides his scalp. His crooked phallic nose has an orange pigment and a lush forest of air clogs each nostril. What's left of his body resembles a massive neck decorated with an innumerable number of chins splaying all the way down to his torso. From his shoulders, two thin yet fat-laden arms hang loose with false wooden hands procured to the ends. Farther down along his body, the blue fades into pink and the chins fade into a bulbous bosom topped off by two gnarled mammary glands covered in hair. His thick stomach appears bloated, easily mistaken to being pregnant, as it hangs over his wooden waist like a tired old beagle resting its head on a porch. Finally, the only two pieces of clothing he's wearing- two rotting shoes cover the splintering pegs he calls legs. K'nuckles opens his ragged jaw once again, "I said shut yer mouth, Bubbie!" A rancid tooth propels itself out of his mouth, appearing to be committing suicide in order to escape the captain's sour body once and for all.
The huge enflamed uvula hanging from the back of her massive throat sways with the sound of Bubbie's voice, "K'nuckles! You're lucky its such a hot day out or I'd have enough energy to kick you out!" With this remark the old captain allows his sagging form to slump down across the whale's spacious lumpy tongue, "Eh, just keep your mouth shut…" he mumbles with a hint of disdain in his gravelly voice. The young boy wearing a striped shirt and with a small sailor hat resting atop his blond locks scrambles across Bubbie's expansive maw to his captain coming to a rest with his sticky palms laid upon K'nuckles' gut, rising and lowering slowly with each hollow breath. "It's alright, Bubbie. The cap'n just needs his beauty sleep!" The boy rubs his rosy cheeks across the hairy torso and his eyes shine with delight. "Flapjack!" howls K'nuckles, "Get offa me! I'm hot enough without you huggin' me!" as he slams his hard wooden hands into the boys sodden face, sending him hurtling down onto one of Bubbie's spongy taste buds. Flapjack doesn't seem injured. He lies in place staring in awe up at his sweating idol. From deep within the deep red tunnel behind them a rumbling burst of sound erupts, "Alright K'nuckles, that's it! Don'tchu dare hurt my baby! Get out!" Bubbie's prehensile tongue writhes itself around the salty captain in an instant, tightening its grip around his flabby body, expelling a large quantity of stinking sweat like a sponge. K'nuckles can only grunt in despair as his constricted figure is hurled out from the relatively cool sanctuary that is Bubbie's mouth.
K'nuckles body smacks hard against the wooden dock. All he can muster is a deep exacerbated breath as his gelatinous corpse-like body collides with the unyielding surface. Flapjack looks on in through a fetid gap in Bubbie's teeth. On his face rests a concerned expression, but he says nothing. After regaining enough consciousness to speak, K'nuckles grunts, "Bubbie…" only to be immediately cut off by his adversary, "Don't say another word K'nuckles. If you want to crawl your sorry butt back inside, you'll have to get me some ointment for my dry skin," she declares with poise, "That's the only way you're getting back in here." K'nuckles looks on in confusion, "But-" only to be interrupted again, "I said no more words, K'nuckles. Now go get me that ointment or you can find some other mouth to bum around in!" The enormous mammal stares down at the sweltering captain. Sweat trickles down from K'nuckles bubbling body as he sheepishly looks up at her massive face. Finally, after some deliberation the old scoundrel lifts his drooping mass up from the planks below and waddles up the stairs behind him, grumbling along the way.
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