Morning showers are always best; a time when I get a chance to just stand under the hot flowing water and think about my life. Mum always shielded our thoughts in the house. It gave dad a break from having to listen to our every thought and it gave us privacy, something I'd been very grateful for recently because today, as I stand here in the shower, I think about the one person I've thought about for the past 2 weeks. Jacob Black, my best friend. Ugh, I know, this all sounds like something out of a stupid chick flick, boy and girl are best friends, girl falls for boy, then boy realises and they fall madly in love. Yeah, I wish the last bit was true, but the odds of Jake falling madly in love with me are minimal. He sees me as his best friend, I'd even go as far to say a little sister. And it's at this realisation every morning that I'm left deflated and so I finish rinsing my hair and leave the shower. I dry my body and put on my underwear. I look out the window and notice that Forks is experiencing one of it's very rare sunny days. "Shorts it is", I say to myself. I normally just leave my hair to dry naturally as it seems to fall into perfect curls that way, one of the perks of being a half vampire I guess. Then, the smell of bacon and eggs catches my attention, Grandma must've finished making me breakfast, I smile to myself, her cooking is by far the best, but I'd never admit that to mum! And with that thought, and me basically drooling from the scent, I descend the stairs into the chaos below.
Of course the first thing I see as the living room comes into view is uncle Emmett and Jasper playing Xbox.
"NO NO NOOOOO!" Emmett shouts as Jasper kills him in COD. "I demand a rematch, you've got to be cheating!…. NESSIE, you saw that right, He definitely cheated?" Emmett shouts like the bad loser that he is.
"Typical Emmett", I giggle.
Jasper laughs too then looks at me and winks. I shake my head and proceed to the kitchen. I haven't yet spotted mum, dad, Rose or Alice. Grandma notes the confusion in my eyes and says, "They've gone hunting darling".
Of course, I remember they mentioned it briefly last night. I sit down to my amazing breakfast of eggs and bacon that my grandma Esme has prepared for me. She kisses me on the cheek and smiles at me, she was always so affectionate and gentle like that, well as affectionate and gentle as a vampire can be!
"Where's Grandpa?" I ask with a mouthful of bacon.
She shakes her head and laughs, "He was called into work this morning, there was a bad crash last night and they needed his help" she replies.
Grandpa Carlisle was the best doctor in Forks, if you were ever sick, he'd be the one you want looking after you. For a vampire, he was pretty good at controlling himself around blood, I had a lot of respect for him for that.
"Honey, I'm homeeeeeee!", a voice yelled from the door. I giggle and blush, I would know that voice anywhere. It was Jake, I couldn't help the smile on my face. He rounded the corner and I saw him in all his beautiful glory. He stood there topless (of course, he was a werewolf and they never got cold which meant he was basically always topless, thank you God), he wore his simple denim cut-offs and pair of low cut black converse. His face was perfect in every way. He had dark eyes, perfect jaw line that tensed when he got angry, the most amazing smile I've ever seen I'd always melt when I saw it which is why it's impossible to get mad at him, his black hair tousled from running and the of course how can we forget that body of his? He looks like something out of a catalogue, his frame large and toned, tan and just perfect in every way. A Greek God, that's what he was; God's gift to women. Damn.
"Earth to Nessiieeee?" Jake says as he waves his hand in front of my face.
Damn I must've been day dreaming… again. "Yo, sorry in a world of my own there", I laugh nervously trying to shake it off.
"Yeah..", Jake says eyeing me suspiciously.
"So what are we doing today?" I ask, trying my hardest to change the subject.
"Oh yeah, today", he breaks into a huge smile. "Well it's already the third day of Summer, and what's the one thing on our Summer bucket list that we've been wanting to do since the start of school?"
Ah the Summer bucket list, It was something Jake and I had made throughout the school year because we were determined to have an amazing Summer now that my mum and dad had given me a bit more freedom because they trusted both Jake and I, and besides I was 17. (Well physically anyway, in reality I was only 4, but come on, I am a half vampire!). It consisted mostly of doing things like going cliff diving, camping on the beach or staying up all night. Just stupid teenager things that Jake wanted me to experience. I appreciated him for doing this and actually hanging out with me, because although he looked about 17, Jake was actually 21. Again, the perks to being a 'mythical' creature! But what was it he wanted to do from the list today?
"Uhmmmm, I don't know?" I reply
"Nessie, we are gonna spend the whole day down at the lake, swimming all day", he replied with a huge grin.
Jake and I always wanted to just spend the whole day swimming in the lake, bring a picnic and just spend the whole day there, swimming and not caring. We both loved swimming and was something we always did together. Ok, so you're probably thinking that our list is lame, but Forks hardly has a lot going for it, neither does La Push where Jake lives. And the list is special to me because it's experiences that Jake and I can share together while making fun memories that I'll remember forever. Damn I've got it bad.
"Wohoo let's go", I say in excitement.
The lake looked beautiful on sunny days like this. I had packed my favourite little black and white poka dot bikini that Alice had bought me. Grandma had packed us a picnic full of sandwiches, drinks, some fruit and of course her famous chocolate chip cookies that were both Jake and I's favourite! This is the first time we'd been down here in a while because the weather hadn't been so great and we'd both also had a lot of schoolwork. I was getting excited now, I really did love spending time down here and had only realised how much I missed it. I quickly tore my clothes off and looked to see where Jake was. He wasn't that far from me and it looked like he'd had the same idea as he was standing in his swimming shorts, ready for the water. I looked at his face and noticed he looked a little embarrassed, he was staring straight at me. Why was he embarrassed? It's not like I hadn't seen him in swimming shorts before? And he couldn't be self conscious, he was perfect for crying out loud! What is it then? .. Oh no, I bet it's me. I must be staring again and making him uncomfortable. Great. Why can't my crush be subtle ? Ok just run for the water, shake it off. He'll follow and then we'll mess around and he'll forgot all about it and then maybe he won't think I'm some creep. So I just that, I ran and dived straight into the water, hoping to God that he'd follow, and sure enough he did.
It was approaching around 3 o'clock already, we'd literally spend hours in the water just messing around, floating and talking about stuff. Right now, we were floating and talking about the rest of the boys in the pack.
"I mean Seth is such an amazing guy, any girl would be lucky to have him. It's just, he has no confidence in himself so he won't go out and meet girls. I think a part of him thinks that he won't have to because one day a girl will just fall in love with him because fate has chosen her to", Jake says.
"Ah you mean like the imprint thing?" I reply
"Yeah exactly, he thinks that he'll just find an imprint and live happily ever after but I keep telling him it's not that easy." Jake sighs. He cares a lot about Seth and is basically like an older brother to him. "I mean just because a few of us have imprinted, it doesn't mean that it's a sure that we all will… it's not always a given. Imprinting is unpredictable, it works in weird, mysterious ways that none of us will understand" He sighs again.
"Awww poor Seth", I say. Poor me too. Yet another thing that will keep me and Jake apart. The second he imprints he'll belong to someone else and I'll truly be out of the picture. I guess I'm just holding onto the fact that Jake says that imprinting isn't a given, praying that for Jake, it isn't a given and that it'll never happen and he'll always be mine. Yeah, I know, it's selfish of me.
"Life will figure it out, if it's meant to happen it will I guess" he says smiling at me. I can't help but smile back at him. He splashes water in my face and I splash it back at him. This escalates into a wrestling match in the water. Typical, immature us. Jake manages to dunk me under the water, but I know his weakness; tickles. So I move underwater so I'm directly beside his ribs and tickle him until his hands loosen in a surrender and I'm freed above the water. I quickly grab Jake while his defence is down and dunk him under the water. Surprise attacks are the only ones that work on Jake because he's stronger than me and can always defeat me in fights, although he does sometimes let me win. Jake resurfaces again to face me and we both wrestle, each trying to gain control. Then suddenly I freeze. Jake wrestles for a few more seconds then freezes too. Somewhere among the chaos of wrestling and messing around Jake's hand has accidentally landed on my boob. Well, this is very awkward. I mean, for me this is heaven, it would be for anyone having their crush THAT close to them, however, for Jake, this is probably hell. He jerks his hand away.
"Oh crap uhmm yeah sorry I didn't realise that my hand was… there and uhm yeah, sorry", he apologises looking very awkward.
"Uhm yeah it's ok Jake don't worry about it", I laugh nervously.
"Sorry if it made you uncomfortable . Yeah I didn't mean to my hand just, like we were messing and the-" he stammers. Obviously he didn't mean to do it, yay friend zone.
"Jake, relax I know you didn't do it purposely", I say, a little too disheartened. I think Jake noticed because he's eyeing me weirdly.
"Uhmm lets go get some of Esme's cookies then, I'm starving", I say climbing out of the water before he can reply. I hear Jake follow me out of the water a few seconds later. He is wearing a weird expression on his face and I know why. If it wasn't clear before, it's definitely clear now. Jake knows I have a crush on him. Great, this should be awkward.
Jake grabs a cookie and sits facing me, keeping his distance. Ugh he probably thinks I'm some sort of creep.
"Nessie", he says. I look up and the expression on his face isn't good. It's the kind of expression your mum wears when she wants to tell you your goldfish has died. Or so I imagine, I've never actually had a goldfish.
"Look Nessie, I think we need to talk…" he says seriously. Oh no, Jake is never serious. I know what's about to happen, he's about to tell me that he knows about my crush and that he doesn't feel the same. Then I'll look like an idiot and probably cry or something stupid and our friendship will be awkward and ruined forever. Shit! I need to save this, Uhmm think Nessie, quick…. I've got it!
"So Nessie r-", he begins but I interrupt.
"Uhm Jake, can I talk to you about something, it's kinda important, well to me..", I say.
"What, uhm sure I guess?", he looks confused. I hope this works.
"Uhm so…. There's this guy that I really like. He's the first and … uhmm, only guy that I've ever liked and I don't know what to do about it". I lie. Jake looks almost happy, kinda excited? Probably relieved because now he thinks that I 'don't have a crush on him'. I continue, " The guy, he's a uhm, a guy from my class at sch-" I begin.
"Wait? School? This guy you like is a guy from your class?…. That's where you know him from, school?", Jake replies? He seems hurt.
"Uhm yeah he ju-". I didn't even get to finish my sentence before Jake had left.