Frankendoodle

by MidnightSakuraBlossom and SYD

6th in my collection of Hetalia/Spongebob parodies! Japan and Italy are just chilling one day when they come across a magic pencil that can draw anything and bring it to life. It's all fun and games until Japan draws himself and the drawing turns evil and seeks to destroy him! Can he and Italy battle the drawing or, will he erase THEM out of existence instead...?

1. Part 1

"When drawing anything, you must put full passion into it. Your creation is not worthy of existing, unless there is heart and soul put unto by the creator. So pick up a pencil, pen, or brush and begin to draw out something beautiful. Or...evil..." - StormofyourDestiny sharing some "words of wisdom" about art for no apparent reason

Oh, here I am again with another Hetalia/Spongebob parody. I swear, I write too many of these things and I get more and more into them each time. XD Hope you like this one, I tried to make it work as much as possible. But it seemed fitting. I understand that Italy and Japan would be fitting as Patrick and Spongebob respectfully, just because of the whole...art topic...yeah...

Here's the character roles for any of you who aren't familiar with the cartoon:

Japan as Spongebob Squarepants (I don't get it either, okay? :| )

Italy as Patrick Star (Once again...XD...)

OC!Doodle!Japan as Doodlebob

Rome as the random artist in a creative slump

Romano as Squidward Tentacles

France as the French Narrator dude (let's just all pretend that France is watching everyone behind a bush or object during the story and narrating everything just for the hell of it :D)

I did NOT include the "FINLAND!" quote by the way. Or any of the bowling scene. I WANTED TO so much. But I didn't because I couldn't find a way to write it without laughing so hard, and also because I couldn't write it in for trying to make the story underneath a certain word count. Sorry.

Disclaimer: I own neither Hetalia or Spongebob Squarepants. And...I'm sad. :'(

-MidnightSakuraBlossom

X

Frankendoodle (Part 1)

Written By: MidnightSakuraBlossom

X

"Ah...the artist at work." A random voice commented from nowhere, words spoken with a noticeable French accent. The focus zoomed in on an artist at work.

Somewhere in Heaven. Or hell. Or some alternate dimension created for the benefit of past nations that couldn't make it in the world. White light was shining from as far as the eye could see, the only thing truly visible was a random canvas and a man wearing Roman clothing happily and rapidly drawing something on it like a freak or something.

"Note the dedication he is putting into his creation. Look at his wonderful, perfect form and grip of the pencil in hand. You will never be able to comprehend his masterpiece-in-waiting no matter how hard you try." Rome didn't seem to notice this narrating because he was far too into his work to care about anything. His grip on the pencil was intense and yet passionate, his eyes burned with theoretical flames of lust as he furiously drew some kind of picture on his canvas. Perspiration built on his brow, but it was all out of true thrill from the heat of the moment. "...Ew. But please ignore the sweat. It's a turn off."

So involved in his work, Rome didn't notice how his grip was too powerful and rough. The abused pencil slipped from his fingers with a ton of force and he gasped and watched as it fell through the...clouds/silver floor/infinity? It's sharpened point penetrated through and fell out of the dimension while it's user cried out in shock (A/N: that's...what she said...?).

Immediately, Rome fell to the clouds/silver floor/infinity and started digging like a madman through the matter. But he could not get to his beloved pencil, it was already long gone into the present world. And...and the tragic twist was that this was his ONLY pencil left!

"NOOOOOO!"

"The artist has learned his first lesson: never grip your pencil too tightly and cause it to be catapulted out of your hand. But...now that he has no pencil, and it actually held mystical powers, what will happen to the object of wonderful creation now?"

X

Italy and Japan sat outside in a small field with well-kept grass. The wind was blowing just as softly as ever, the sun was positioned perfectly, and they both had a Japanese-style table.

They both seated at the table, arms folded on their knees for a few seconds before quickly making a fist with one of their hands as they sat across trying to hold a heated and dead serious gaze.

"Are you ready, Italy-San?"

"Ve~ I'm ready!"

Almost in slow motion, the two shook their fists before releasing it and letting their fingers come into shapes. Two of Japan's fingers were in the shape of scissors, while Italy's was flat like paper. This was the second time that it happened since their game of rock, paper scissors.

"Scissors cut paper, Italy-San." Japan stated matter-of-factly. His fingers 'cut through' Italy's, and the Italian sighed sadly at the turn of events.

The two were blissfully unaware of the fact there was a big-ass pencil currently falling from the sky at about 89 MPH and was about to crash into the city.

Again, the two assumed their positions and seriously tried to consider their strategies to win this match. Seeing as though Italy didn't have much to do at the point in time, he decided it would be fun to visit Japan and maybe spend some time playing that rock, paper, scissors game with him since Germany claimed he didn't have the time to hang out with him. But coming to the other side of the world all alone seemed scary for Italy, so he dragged his brother along with him.

Romano had been totally against this, but then Spain and Prussia both barged into his home freaking out because 'France has gone missing' and wanted him to aid them in the search to find him. And...maybe even join them afterward for a steamy one night stand, they had added with rape faces going on. That was how Romano had made up his mind to be dragged to the other side of the world.

This time, Japan and Italy both did paper. "Italy-San...how come you always do paper?"

Italy hadn't the time to answer because the big-ass pencil finally finished falling for hours and it landed directly in the center of their table with a thunderous SMACK! To top it off. Luckily, they had moved their hands out harm's way in time.

The two stared at the pencil currently staying lodged in the hole it's lead at made. Eyes blinking stupidly in a belated manner as they took in the scene.

Then they stood up and screamed.

Japan and Italy then proceeded to run around flailing and freaking out for no reason at all, pausing only to stare back at the horrifying big-ass pencil before screaming again and taking cover behind the former's tool shed.

"What is that, Japan...?" Italy asked, voice trembling as he poked his head from behind their shelter. He could see the pencil stuck in their table, unmoving.

"It looks like it might be a giant pencil from the heavens."

"Go touch it..."

Taking in a deep breath and trying to look composed, Japan brushed past Italy and slowly and yet confidently walked across his yard to get to the giant pencil. In a matter of seconds, he arrived just a few feet away and extended a finger to 'touch it'. Which seems dirty if you think about it...

When his finger met the rough surface, and the pencil didn't move, Japan released his breath and turned back to where Italy could be seen trembling and constructing a white flag behind the tool shed. "It is just a pencil, Italy-San. Completely harmless."

"Ve~ That's a relief!" Italy smiled and tucked the newly-constructed flag into his pocket, somehow, and made his way over to the scene to get a better look at the pencil.

The pencil was larger than the ordinary writing tool. WAY LARGER. It would have to take two hands to be able to draw or even hold it. And Italy somehow doubted he could possibly be one to accomplish such a thing. Though he had to admit he would love to meet the person in the heavens whom owned it.

"Maybe we can draw some giant pictures with this. To put it to use." Japan reached for the pencil and held it steadily with both hands. He then walked over to the side of the streets and began to draw.

And then, Italy giggled happily and basically threw himself over, bouncing on his heels. "Ve~ What are you drawing, Japan? What? What?"

One cannot simply draw with a clingy Italian standing over them. At least, that was what one would assume Japan would have said at taking notice of how annoyed he looked momentarily. However, he instead replied,

"Stand back, Italy-San! I can't draw with you literally breathing down my neck!" Japan said this with unusual shock at the fact Italy wouldn't give him any space to draw with the big-ass pencil. He shoved Italy back with a hand, before returning to his work.

"Ugh. Japanese artists..." Italy murmured under his breath, briefly. But his moment of disapproval was soon forgotten when Japan announced he was finished, he smiled and returned to breathing over his shoulder to look at the artwork.

The drawing on the side of the road was a rather accurate version of a crane. Italy took in the whole form overall like some sort of scholar, and Japan gave him space to do so.

"It is a crane." Japan mentioned, looking down at his creation. The fainest trace of pride entered his tone as he added, "Notice how I did not need to see one in front of me to draw it in an accurate detail. And I was so fast, perhaps delayed by ten seconds due to my confusion over how to draw with both hands."

"Ve~ That's actually pretty good, Japan." Japan nodded in agreement, before Italy made a 'tsk tsk' sound, he immediately stared at the unimpressed Italian. "However, you must take into consideration that it's lacking in basic construction. And your style of art leaves a lot to be desired for Europeans whom have not had experience with the Asians."

"Everyone's a critic..." Japan murmured under his breath as soon as Italy's intelligent moment faded and he smiled like he tended to do when he had no true idea about what was going on around him.

All of a sudden, Japan's crane gained life. It made a noise and then lifted itself from the ground it had previously been spawned onto.

Italy noticed this first, he gasped and gestured behind Japan. "Japan! Japan, your crane is coming to life!"

"Thank you for the good criticism, Italy-San..."

"No! It's flying away!"

Japan turned just in time to see the crane spread it's wings and fly far away from the city. He stared unmoving, completely stunned to see such a thing. Italy was too in awe over the turn of events, but yet he also waved goodbye to the drawing.

"Do you know what this means...?" Japan asked, turning to Italy with a surprised expression as he held out the pencil.

"Your art can never hang in a museum..."

"No, it means that we have found a pencil with the power of whatever god exists." The pencil suddenly glittered and gleamed as the sun lined up just right and showed of it's power and glory. Japan was mystified, he couldn't believe they had discovered that kind of pencil. Italy was nothing short of excited.

"Jesus gave us this pencil! Ve~! How exciting!" Italy clasped his hands together and looked skyward with glee. "Now all I need is a Heavenly mustache, and all my dreams will have come true!"

"I can assist you with living the dream, stay still." Japan lifted the pencil again and draw across Italy's lip with it. Forming a mustache (A/N think in the exact same style of the one Peter Griffin had when he tried to speak Italian).

And although it would normally be dangerous to stick lead into one's skin in such a manner, Italy did not have to worry about this at all because he was basically immortal. Even if the lead went into his bloodstream, he could not get killed. Random fact.

Italy's gaze lowered to the drawn mustache and he immediately cried out with happiness, "VE~! LIFE IS GOOD!" All of a sudden, the mustache got life of it's own and fluttered off his upper lip and far away from them through a window of a nearby hotel. Japan stared at this, before turning to a shrugging Italy. "That is why I don't have a mustache. You have them one second, and they're gone before the fun can be had. Strangely, I can never shave my body and the clumps of hair still remain forever..."

"Too much information..."

"Ve~ sorry..."

X

"Face it, Romano. You're getting a little lackluster as of late." Romano scoffed at his reflection in the mirror of his hotel room. Standing before it and giving rather harsh criticism like he had no self esteem or something of that category. He folded his arms over his chest, dissatisfied. "There needs to be some kind of change to your style, otherwise you won't be getting anymore women. Damn, I can't believe Veneziano has TWELVE dates lined up and I have fucking TEN."

He padded across the floor, shifting his attention to the window. For the first time since arriving at the very weird Japanese hotel he would never grasp the culture of, he went over to the window and opened it up. Allowing the gentle breeze to come in and cool his jets for at least a second.

Although he was still worried, the fact that his stupid brother had more dates lined up than him once they returned home...not to mention the girls they encountered here, it felt so dissatisfying. He felt defeated. But this would hopefully change: he just had to take a huge risk and update his style. Not that he already wasn't fashionable and attractive.

He just needed SOMETHNG to make the difference. Any alteration to his appearance – mild one – would or could make that difference he yearned to have. So anything...

And then, Italy's drawn mustache blew in and attached itself to Romano's upper lip. He stood there frozen, alert, confused as to how that had just happened. Was it logical for facial hair to fly through windows and attach itself to someone of it's own accord?

Damn, he didn't even bother to answer that. Because he now had something that made a rather interesting alteration to his appearance! This mustache made him strikingly sexy now that he looked it over in the mirror! (A/N: Because this mustache was magic courtesy of the pencil, and had the ability to make any man drop dead sexy.)

X

"Ve~ Ve~ Let me try drawing with that pencil, Japan!" Italy smiled and his hands extended for the pencil. Which Japan kept out of his reach.

"You cannot just rush into drawing something, Italy-San. Each creation is valuable and unique, it should take precise work and much determination to be successful. Think of it as precious life." Japan retorted, holding the pencil protectively away from the creative Italian wanting to take advantage of it's powers, probably.

This brought the Italian to a state of discouragement. He whined childishly and his arms extended forward, hands continuously stretching to grasp the pencil. And the following exchange occurred:

"Ve~ I want to draw something! Besides, I was going to draw an anime-type picture..."

"You should have said so sooner."

Promptly, the pencil was placed into Italy's desperate hands at that comment. After all, the fact that he wanted to draw an anime-type picture was very convincing. If he really wanted to try this art style, how could Japan discourage him? Besides, he really wanted to see an Italian take a shot at this sort of thing. Maybe he could learn something new or get ideas...

Japan backed up inches away to give Italy some breathing room to create his drawing. After around fifty seconds went by in an unusually slow and painful fashion, he returned and looked over his shoulder to see the final product.

The drawing on the side of the road was of a chibi Romano. Romano was scowling as usual, dressed in maid garb and holding a tomato. Italy, eager to hear some response to his work that he thought of as a masterpiece (A/N: Because it was a masterpiece. What kind of Italian can draw like a manga artist? I know I, for one, cannot...okay, I'll stop with the notes! Don't kill me! *Surrenders to your act of violence out of the hate and goes to hide behind a protective brick wall*).

"As you can see, I perfected your anime style with this drawing, Japan. Ve~ isn't it amazing?" Italy turned to Japan, whom was wearing the typical poker face while looking over the creation. Italy just wore a brilliant smile.

"It looks like a tiny, pouting girl eating a tomato."

"Haha~ No, silly! This is Romano when he was a kid!"

While they were having that exchange, the drawing of Romano as a kid magically started moving of it's own accord. Drawing!Chibi!Romano arose as if alive and had a black outline, with a gray body due to being drawn on the street. He started stomping around and cursing in Japanese, causing the two to stop and stare.

"It's kind of creepy-looking to see an Italian boy dressed as a maid from centuries ago cursing all of us out in my language." Japan commented blandly upon fully noticing this piece of information that made no sense. With disgust, he shuddered as the cursing grew louder.

"Ew, you're right, Japan." Italy said, apparently grossed out by the situation. He cradled the pencil away from this bitchy chibi and wore a disgusted expression as well.

Drawing!Chibi!Romano was infuriated with the two for dissing him and, rather than murdering them right then and there like he wanted to, he threw down the tomato and huffed as he began to storm away.

"We can't let him escape into town! He will offend my people!"

"Ve! I can't just terminate him, he's my fratello!"

"Italy-San! The real Romano-San is inside that hotel, just erase this one!"

"Ve! You're starting to sound drastic! But, if that's what must be done...I'm sorry, Romano..."

Before the drawing of his brother could escape, Italy shifted the pencil to where it was upside down and erased him down to nothing. All that could be heard were tiny squeals in horror as he was terminated. Italy and Japan sadly stared with funeral tunes playing in their heads.

"...Poor Romano." Italy choked, tearing as he looked over at Japan.

Rather than feeling sorry about Drawing!Chibi!Romano, Japan got a rather brilliant idea from this experience. He smiled wickedly like a graduate plotting to toilet paper his high school, this actually freaked out Italy because seeing JAPAN with any source of emotion on his poker face was a rare treat. Or, well, rare horror in this case. He couldn't help but feel intimidated.

"I believe I have another idea for a drawing." Japan returned to his poker face, he grabbed the pencil and Italy followed him over to the hotel. "Italy-San, you stand outside the window of the room your brother is staying in. And when I give my signal, you will cry out to get his attention."

"Ve~ what are you going to do?"

"I am going to pull a prank. Something I haven't performed in a rather long time."

"YOU are going to pull a prank on Romano? Ve~! I'll help~!"

Trying to get out all of his giggles, Italy released them quietly as he hurried over to the window he assumed Romano to be at. They had separate rooms, but he was sure he knew where Romano was.

Japan, meanwhile, stood over the pale golden color mat in front of the doors to the hotel. He tried to not look suspicious as he took the pencil in both hands and draw over it. He drew a perfect Euro dollar and then made a long, curry line as he made his way over to Italy underneath the window.

"This is going to be so classic!"

"Italy-San, it is not time for your signal yet."

X

"I think a sexy single Italian like myself should go out into the city and hook up with Japanese girls..."

Romano was not kidding when he said he was sexy. It may sound really vain, but anyone, even straight dudes would agree that he was even more sexy than usual. What kind of sorcery caused this phenomenon, you ask? The magic mustache Japan drew!

Romano was all ready to grace the Japanese city with his presence. He was pulling off a stylish black suit, new shoes, his hair perfectly mussed as it needed to be, an alluring smirk, and that magical mustache ready to break some hearts...if that was logically possible. Really, what...the...hell...?

"FRATELLO~! COME TO THE WINDOW~!"

Frustrated with the distraction, Romano stomped loudly across the room to the said window where his brother's annoyingly high-pitched voice could be heard. Upon looking out, he was about to ask why the fuck he was yelling at him to come to the window. But then his eyes fell on the Euro dollar on the ground. He brightened up at the site.

He could use some cash to impress the ladies...

But Romano hadn't even completed that thought in his head before he bolted out of the hotel room and down to the first floor out into the world. He knew he HAD to be the first to get that defenseless dollar up for grabs! Then he could dump his stupid brother in this country and take a flight back home and live a happy life! Genius plan!

X

Romano exited the hotel to find the money had shifted positions and was now in front on the golden colored matt. His eyes gleamed as he hastily lowered his arms to retrieve it. What he didn't know, was that Japan and Italy were hiding on the side of the building and the "dollar" was attached to a long line of supposed string which Japan held the other end of.

As soon as Romano had his hands on the dollar, Japan gave the supposed string a sharp tug, Italy's face brightened up in that moment. And the next thing he knew, his brother had fallen in a crumpled heap on the ground and thee Heavenly Mustache he was sporting fell to the dirt useless.

Japan and Italy revealed their presence from the side of the hotel, both laughing in their own ways which really differed and Romano scrambled to his knees glaring at them upon noticing the string with the Euro dollar attached.

"You sneaky bastards-" Romano noticed a black flash from the corner of his eye, he gasped to see the Heavenly Mustache magically fly away from the scene. "The mustache!" His eyes began to quiver for a brief second, before he scowled and lifted himself from the ground. "YOU KEEP RUINING MY LIFE! GO FUCK YOURSELVES!"

Reacting dramatically over the loss of his special charm and ruined life, Romano bolted back into the hotel to have a big freakout in his room. Japan and Italy seemed to forget what they had done and looked at each other with curiosity.

"Ve~ what should we draw now, Japan?" Italy asked happily, he really was having a great time and he didn't except himself to considering the day started out nondescript.

Japan thought about what to do for a moment, before he snapped a finger and walked over to the street again. Italy bounced on the balls of his feet looking over his shoulder to watch him draw...

To Be Continued In Part 2 – Don't Miss It!

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Unlike my other parodies, this one is going to be broken up in two parts. This was the first, the second will get to the real action and the ending so it will be longer. I don't usually do this, but I wanted to experiment! Not to mention the fact I was tired when writing this and wanted to get some sleep so I continued it the next day and so on until it was complete.

I hope you like the story so far, please click the button and go to the next chapter for the rest! I will meet you there! Remember to read and review, and never confuse jelly and jam – I once was eating breakfast when SYD burst into the kitchen freaking out about not having jelly for her biscuit and I'm just confused because I have a container of jam on the table...but she claimed it was not the same and my expression was basically: :C So yeah...random story.

-MidnightSakuraBlossom