This story was co-written with Fiorella - Fio - She plays Jasper and I play Carlisle the other characters we have split between us. Don't forget when you review to give her credit as well. :D
Summary: Edward, Emmett and Jasper are left to their own devices while Esme and the girls go shopping and Carlisle's at work. During a competition that Emmett dreams up, the boys end up breaking and wrecking several things. Despite their best efforts to fix some of the items, it isn't as good as it was originally. Lies are told to cover up their misdeeds, but when more lies are needed to keep the original lies going, the boys find the whole thing snowballing on them.
WARNING!! This story will contain spanking of vampires. If that isn't your thing DO NOT READ. If you read this anyway and then COMPLAIN about it I WILL LAUGH AT YOU.
Chapter 1
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It was early Saturday morning. Edward was already at his piano playing and had been there since Carlisle left earlier that morning, before the sun had even risen. Esme flitted down the stairs and stood near Edward listening to him as he played. She stood there only a moment before she kissed his cheek and headed over to the table to work on some new designs for the next house they acquired.
Jasper and Alice came down, he was holding her hand like the perfect southern gentleman he is, saying sweet things to each other, looking (as always) like the perfect couple. Alice smiled sweetly and bounced at Esme and Edward as she saw them, "Morning!!". Jasper smiled at his lovely hyper wife and repeated after her "..morning"
Edward never wavered in his playing as he looked over at Jasper and Alice. "Morning," he said and turned back to the piano. Esme smiled warmly when she saw them. She walked over and hugged Alice first and then Jasper. "Good morning sweethearts," Esme said happily as she looked at both of them. "What so you two have planned for the day?" she asked.
Rosalie came down before anyone could answer with Emmett thundering down the stairs behind her. "Emmett! How many times have I told you not to do that? You're going to break something one of these days doing that," Esme lightly scolded. She went to her other two children and hugged them both. "How are you both this morning?" she asked.
"I'm fine as usual," Rosalie replied. She nodded at Alice and Jasper and then gave Edward a look. "What no good morning to me?" she asked.
"Good morning Rosalie," Edward replied automatically without looking her way nor stopping in playing.
Alice smiled at her two brothers "Actually, Jazz and I have an announcement to make" Alice said through a lovely singing voice "...WE ARE GETTING MARRIED!" she bounced happily. Jasper smiled lightly and rolled his eyes "...again..."
Alice loved and adored getting married, this was going to be the eleventh time in the last ten years, the perfect excuse for getting a beautiful new dress, throwing a lovely reception...and of course another honeymoon... Jasper just smiled at her, he just couldn't say no.
"Isn't that great??? oh! Rosalie! Mom! We gotta see the new boutique at the mall!"
Rosalie and Esme shared a smile. Edward actually stopped playing to stare at his brother, he glanced over at Emmett to see what he thought and found Emmett was looking at him as well. They both turned and looked at Jasper again, smirked and shook their heads. They knew he did anything and everything his wife asked.
"Hey I'm up for a mall trip, Mom?" Rosalie asked as she made her way over to her mother.
"That sounds wonderful Alice, boys are you gonna come?" Esme asked.
Emmett and Edward both answered together. "NO!"
Edward composed himself at the look on his mother's face and said, "All day shopping sessions are not something we look forward to Mom you know that." He smiled hoping to placate his mother and sisters.
Alice smiled at Jasper "You're coming, right my love?"
Jasper couldn't help but to make a face "Well...uhm..."
"Oh please, Jazzy-pooh!" Alice's eyes pleaded.
Jasper growled a little, he hated when she called him that in front of the others...but, smiled...How could he be upset with his Alice?...however he did hate shopping... "Wouldn't it be better if it was just the girls? Besides...uhm...isn't it bad luck if I see you in the dress, my love?"
Alice sighed and nodded "Ok, my love... But you have to be good, ok?" She hugged him closely.
"Always am."
"Good boy!" She stood on her tiptoes and kissed him.
Edward and Emmett both snickered at Alice's nickname for Jasper and then how she called him a good boy. "Yeah Jazzy-pooh be a good boy," Emmett said teasingly at his brother.
"Knock it off Emmett. You'd better be a good boy too if you know what's good for you," Rosalie growled threateningly at her mate. She didn't use her nick name for him as it was something not meant for public use.
Edward couldn't help but snicker at his other brother. Suddenly he heard the clearing of a throat. Edward chanced a look at his mother and immediately ducked his head.
"That goes for you too young man," Esme said as she raised an eyebrow at her son.
"Yes ma'am," Edward murmured.
Jasper glared at his brothers and rolled his eyes at them...But snickered at both his brothers when he heard his sister and mother.
"OK! We should leave now!" Alice started bouncing hyperly and pulled her mother arm "I saw this really cute dress! It would look great on you, mommy!". She looked over Edward and Emmet, ran to them and kissed their cheeks and ran upstairs to find her purse... just a couple of seconds later she was back, nothing was more exciting for her than shopping.
Esme chuckled at her daughter's enthusiasm. "Let me get my purse Alice," Esme called as she watched her daughter bounce back down the stairs.
Rosalie shook her head, but couldn't help but smile as well. She went got her purse and once all the women in the house were downstairs, they headed to the garage. Rosalie kissed Emmett before she left and Esme tousled Edward's hair and gave his cheek a quick pat.
Edward and Emmett gave Jasper a quick look at his snickers, but knew they deserved it. They smiled at their sister and once the women of the house were gone, they both gave a sigh of relief. "I thought they'd never leave," Edward stated.
Alice kissed Jasper good bye "Have fun, hunny"
Alice pouted "Say it with your accent..."
Jasper sighed and gave her a pleading look.
Alice sighed and nodded "ok, ok...bye, love" She smiled and ran after her mother and sister.
Jasper joined his brothers in the sigh and nodded to Edwards statement
"Alright now that the girls are gone what should we do?" Edward asked.
"Competition time!" Emmett shouted.
"What do you have in mind this time Emmett?" Edward asked genuinely curious.
"Alright first we play Call of Duty and which ever two get through it the quickest, then those two have a race with whatever cars the girls left us and then who ever wins that, wins the competition for the week," Emmett told his brothers.
"What's the reward?" Edward asked.
"I don't know yet, but I'll think of something," Emmett said and then looked at Jasper. " Do you have anything in mind Jasper?"
He smiled at his brothers, but shook his head
"I have to finish my biology project..." He sighed "I promised Carlisle I would have it done by... yesterday, I have to start it...Besides, y'all know I would kick your asses at Call of Duty and I'm the greatest driver, it wouldn't be fair for you!" He snickered teasingly
Edward snorted at that. "Whatever Jasper, your just afraid because you know I'd kick your ass at driving. I'm a helluv a lot better than you," Edward remarked.
"Yeah and I'm better at Call of Duty even if it is a war game. You are not gonna spend your time studying, you can do that later, Carlisle isn't going to care. Come on you have to play with us," Emmett whined sounding very much like a six-year-old.
Jasper rolled his eyes "You have enough tickets to cover your bedroom walls, Edward" Jasper felt the thrilling wave coming from Emmett "No, I can't, I have to finish my project" he sighed.
Edward rolled his eyes and said, "Yeah well just don't tell that to Carlisle. He'll have a fit."
Emmett and Edward shared a look at Jasper's continual reluctance and then Edward nodded at Emmett's thought. They advanced on Jasper intending to tackle him and drag him outside.
Jasper stared at them with a lifted eyebrow, he didn't have to be a mind reader to realize what they wanted to do. "Don't you dare..."
The two advanced on Jasper, tackled him and began to drag him outside. "It's for your own good Jasper, you need to learn to have more fun," Emmett told him as they dragged him outside.
"Tell you what Jasper, if you can beat both Emmett and me, then we'll let you go study like a good boy, but if Emmett and I win, then you have to participate in the competition. Deal?" Edward asked.
Jasper growled a little "That's not fair!" Jasper pulled Edward's arm and threw him away, wrestling with his brothers was always fun.
When Edward landed he shook himself, laughed and ran back to join in again. "Sure it's fair, you just have to beat both of us," Edward said.
Emmett laughed loudly and grabbed Jasper intending on throwing him unfortunately near where Esme's garden was.
Jasper landed on Esme's garden, but didn't realize he did.
Jasper ran back to Emmett, took his hand, began spinning unnaturally fast and threw him into Esme's garden.
Emmett flew into the garden and slid across it flinging dirt and flowers as he did. He got up dusted himself off and ran back over just in time to see Edward grab Jasper and fling him towards the trees. He grinned at Emmett and said, "He may beat us yet Emmett."
"Nah, hey here he comes again," Emmett said as he and Edward both prepared for whoever Jasper came after next.
Jasper actually got to crush one of them and laughed "I still think this is unfair" He picked up the smashed tree and threw it to them.
Emmett and Edward leapt to each side and the tree flew past them and landed directly on top of Esme's garden. The two boys winced once they realized where the tree landed. "Esme's going to kill us," Edward said.
"Nah she'll just kill Jasper," Emmett said with a short, loud laugh.
Edward snickered at this.
Jasper gasped at this. "Damn..." Jasper glared at Emmett. "Hey, it wasn't all my fault!...I think," he sighed.
"Tell you what Jasper, you join in the competition and we'll clean this up so she'll never know. If she does notice we won't blame it on you," Edward said as he looked at his "older" brother.
Jasper sighed, "Fine...so, what was the competition about?"
Emmett's eyes lit up like Christmas trees as he realized Jasper was going to play. "Ok, well the three of us are going to play Call of Duty and then the two who get through it the fastest race in two of the cars to town and back and whichever one wins that gets to make the other two do whatever he wants for the next two weeks," Emmett said with a large grin forming on his face.
Edward sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Emmett you do realize that we will have to make that as inconspicuous as possible otherwise Carlisle and Esme will know what we've been doing and chew us out again," Edward said knowing his parents hated it when he and his brothers did things like this, but it was fun and he couldn't help himself.
Jasper laughed a little "Now, now... Eddy, Carlisle and Esme will never find out..." He thought about the prize and then pictured Edward singing "Like a Virgin" in a wedding dress (knowing that Edward could read his mind); and Emmett carrying shopping bags, following Alice. "This'll be fun" He smiled.
Edward growled at the nickname Jasper used. He hated it and both Jasper and Emmett knew it. He growled even louder at the thoughts he got from Jasper. "That's not gonna happen Jazzy-pooh," Edward said with an even louder growl.
Emmett, with no concern to what Jasper had in mind for him since he felt sure he would win, grinned and exclaimed, "Great! Let's go!"
"Yah, Eddie, y'all can put your boots in the oven, but they ain't turning into biscuits!" Jasper laughed at Edward and followed Emmett.
Emmett and Edward both stopped in their tracks and stared at Jasper. "What the hell does that mean?" Edward asked. In all his years he'd never heard that particular expression before. He growled again as he realized Jasper used that dreaded name for him again.
Emmett guffawed loudly at the name and slapped Edward on the back. "Come on Eddie, you can kick the crap out of him in Call of Duty. When we're done with the competition we can fix the garden," Emmett said.
"I'm kicking the crap out of both of you," Edward growled.
Jasper laughed at them both and patted their heads "How naive" Jasper rolled his eyes and walked to the Xbox 360 and set the game.
Edward swiped at his brother's hand as Emmett laughed at how Jasper had to reach up to pat his. They followed Jasper inside. "Who's going first?" Edward asked as he sat down on the couch.
"We'll let Jasper go first since he thinks he's such an expert at the game," Emmett said as he sat on the other end of the couch leaving the middle open for Jasper.
"Fine." Jasper sat between his brothers "Who am I competing with?"
Edward and Emmett looked at each other and rolled their eyes. "Jasper, has it been that long since you played? You play by yourself. The two of us that get through the game the fastest are the two that race to town and back," Emmet said giving his brother an odd look.
Jasper laughed, he was feeling clumsy, today "True..." He started playing. Jasper chose a short range weapon class, used some tricks he knew for gaining limited ammunitions, like grenades for distracting the enemy. Jasper was soon sitting in front of the large TV, black and white effect on. "Not such hanker after all, Hardcase..." Jasper was starting to remember his days as a soldier, he was even using some Civil War Slangs, a strong tension and excitedness began to built in the room, due to Jasper, he was even thinking in intense strategies of how to keep going...almost forgetting it was all a game. He gained the metal edge at the first confrontation, and began shooting mercilessly. Jasper had a wide smile on his face.
"Dammit," Edward cursed softly. He could hear the thoughts flying through Jasper's mind and looked at Emmett. Emmett was practically bouncing in his seat from the emotions coming off of Jasper. Edward silently cursed again knowing how his brother got when they played any kind of war game.
"Looks like you'll be the loser Eddie boy, Jasper is kicking ass and I'm second best. I'll have to start thinking of things for you two to do," Emmett said not taking his eyes from the television screen.
"Shut up Emmett," Edward growled and threw a pillow at Emmett.
Jasper finished the game in half an hour "Victory!" Jasper smiled at his brothers. "Who's playing' now?"
"My turn!" Emmett shouted as he grabbed for the controller. He flicked the TV back to color and began to play. He was more haphazard when he played shooting anything that moved even his own teammates.
Edward chuckled softly and shook his head at Emmett's playing. It was what took Emmett so long, despite his protests that he was the second best at the game.
Jasper sat next to Edward and watched Emmett play "Don't shoot 'em!" Jasper sighed, thank God we are not in war times, I would have to watch my back with Emmett around, Jasper rolled his eyes and kept on watching.
Edward chuckled at Jasper's train of thought. He watched Emmett and shook his head. "Looks like it's gonna be you and me Jasper, if he keeps killing his team off," Edward said as he watched Emmett hit another one of his own men.
"Yah" Jasper sighed and shook his head, also. "Emmett, it's for today, hurry"
Emmett looked up from the game and asked, "What's for today?" When he looked back, he's guy had been blown up from stepping on a mine. He turned to his brother and growled, "Now see what you made me do. I gotta start over."
Edward groaned and let his head fall back against the couch. "We're gonna be here all day."
Jasper growled, he was annoyed. "Why don't cha let Edward play and see how long it takes him to get where you were in the game...!"
"No. If Edward plays then it's his game. I'm not finished with mine. If you hadn't been talking to me I wouldn't have gotten blown up. It's your fault so be quiet," Emmett growled. He went back to his game and started to play again.
Edward pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. He looked over and saw Jasper was getting frustrated beyond belief. He was surprised it hadn't leaked to him yet. He laid a hand on Jasper's shoulder. "Easy Jazz, you know how Emmett gets when he's in competition mode. We'll give him half an hour more and if he's no further then I'll take my turn okay?"
Jasper sighed heavily and threw himself at the couch "Fine, fine..."
Edward prayed that they'd be able to finish the competition before anyone got home. Well truthfully, he was only concerned about Carlisle. Alice in shopping mode usually took all day. A growl and a crash brought him out of his musings. He looked up and saw Emmett staring at where he had just thrown their game system.
"I hate that game I keep getting blown up!" Emmett growled.
"Great, that's another thing we're going to get yelled at for. Emmett that's the third system we've wrecked this month. Carlisle will be upset to see another on the charge account if we buy one right away," Edward said with a sigh.
"Sorry, guess this means you and Jazz get to race since I broke the system," Emmett said sounding defeated.
Jasper sighed heavily and shook his head. "We'll need a damn good excuse for that... But, whatever... Let's finish the competition so we can start fixing all this up..."
"Well, we can always bury it at the bottom of the trashcan. Esme always makes one of us take it out. If she or Carlisle asks about it we can tell them that it started acting up and we had to throw it out," Edward said wondering if that would be good enough for his parents. "Alright I'm ready to have you two do my bidding. I'm taking my Volvo, what are you taking Jasper?" Edward asked.
Emmett walked over to the shattered game system and winced at another problem. "Uh Edward, we have another problem. You two might want to come here," Emmett said with a hang dog expression on his face.
Edward walked over knowing Jasper was behind him. "Dammit Emmet, how are we going to fix that? Esme'll notice for sure," he said with a growl.