Plan Cannot Possibly Fail
Disclaimer: I do not in any way, shape or form own any of the characters from any of the Pirates of the Caribbean movies. They are the exclusive property of Gore Verbinski, Ted Elliot and Terry Rossio, and by extension the Disney Corporation. This story contains MAJOR SPOILERS for all three movies—as well as what I hope are a few humorous musings about what might have been going on in the heads of some of the characters. Please do not sue me—I make absolutely no money from writing this. This is art for art's sake. Thank you, and enjoy.
Lonely is all we are
Loveless so far
But my heart's still a marble
In her empty jelly jar…
—TV on the Radio, "Young Liars"
Davy Jones
Seeing Calypso not only bound in flesh, but also subject to captivity behind iron bars, gave Davy Jones an immeasurable sense of justice being served.
Even a goddess could be punished… And she deserved every grueling day of it.
She had abandoned him. He had loved her with every fiber of his being—loved her enough to remain chaste for 10 years, so that only she could use him—and she left him all alone, waiting fruitlessly, on the one day he'd been given to devote to her.
He hid his true pleasure, watching her sniffle and sob and grip the bars and try to feebly explain her "nature." He was not fooled. There was nothing "natural" about the Calypso he knew. Natural women were small, and meek, and honest.
Calypso, human or not, was deceitful and false. She still had many tricks she could play—one of which was to, ever so briefly, allow him to feel human and alive again.
Damn that cruel bitch, he thought, when the feeling ended. Damn her and her sentiment. Davy Jones was not going to let this pitiful excuse for a woman—this hell-hag—this abomination unto the Lord—feel superior…
But she did not. She was crestfallen, humbled. All she did was talk about how she loved him—tentacles and all, monstrous as he seemed now, possibly "cruel"—she insisted, voice breaking with sorrow, "I would give you my heart…"
Once she was free, she meant. Not now, of course.
Not that he would have let her do so in that overly fragile skin…
But she loved him still, and she despised the Brethren Court for having bound her in mortal flesh. For doing so, she vowed—with passionate bitterness—to kill every last one of them when she could unleash her fury.
This divulgence gave Davy Jones two very important pieces of information. Firstly, that Calypso finally appeared to respect, or at least understand, the raw, emotional power of human suffering and rage. Secondly, it did not seem to occur to her who might have first told the Brethren Court how to bind her…
She had no suspicions.
She gave those worthless mortals all the credit.
She was going to kill every pirate in the Brethren Court because she had no idea of the very interesting conversations Davy Jones had with them several decades ago. And, because of her apparent lack of this knowledge, he was in the clear…
So he did not lie, per se, when he told her, "My heart will always belong to you." After all, how could she ever know the truth if the Brethren were dead, and safely in his domain to do with as he pleased?