Post Revenge – Chapter 1

Rated T for a teensy-tinsy bit of swearing.

Spoilers for Chasing Ghosts, Berlin and Revenge. (Haven't seen the episodes myself yet though, so it's nothing explicit.)

This is set after the episode Revenge, on the same night Ziva killed Bodner. It might grow into a multi chapter story, you never know, I feel really positive about some real Tiva right now and I'm really motivated about this. Leave a review if you like it, please!

Laying on her back staring at the ceiling, Ziva David knew that she would not be able to order her body to get up. She was always in control of her body but right then and there she thought she would not be able to move even if it cost her her life. It wasn't the pain from her various injuries resulting from the car crash and then her fight with Ilan Bodner earlier that night however, that kept her from moving. Everything in her head was still spinning around like in Tony's movies. That look on Vance's face when she told him it was over, the drive to her apartment, Gibbs telling her to call if there was anything she needed, Gibbs walking her to the door, him unlocking the door. She was in a trance-like state that she wasn't sure she would come out of on her own. She felt beat and at the same time completely numb. Her body felt like it was not attached to her mind anymore, it lay there, absolutely motionless, like she was asleep but her mind was in the exact opposite state. She did not register the sounds her apartment normally made, did not hear the sound of cars driving by. She could not even think about that, she was completely drawn into the film that was her life. It was like she was disconnected from the world.

She felt drained.

Pictures from her fight with Ilan were swirling around in her mind, mixing with other fights she had been in. She did not feel anything.

Her body was ripped out of its state of relaxation be the sound of the doorbell ringing. It was like every muscle in her body contracted at once. Later she would not remember getting up and opening the door.

It was Tony's face that brought her mind back to earth. It must have taken her a couple of seconds because he looked at her with that confused face that, in hindsight, clearly showed how much he cared. Then she finally snapped out of it and regained control over her actions. She put her gun down and let go of the door to let him in.

He stepped inside hesitantly, almost as if he was afraid she'd change her mind about allowing him to come in. She ignored it and gestured for him to go through the hallway to the living room. She took a breath and then followed him there. He was standing at the center of the room when she entered it.

"Well, I gotta say, this is a lot better than that crappy apartment you and McGee were holed up in a couple of days ago", he said, with his back to her, looking around the room. When he turned around after a moment he asked, "You gonna put that away? I don't think you'll need it", pointing at the gun she still had her fingers wrapped around.

She complied and slipped it into her holster again. Funny, she thought. She didn't even remember putting that on.

"You look like crap," he stated. "Still can't sleep?"

Now that he mentioned it, she was really tired. In her half-sleep/half-alert state she hadn't noticed, but yes, her eyes were burning and her body had felt like steel for the past couple of days anyway. She must have taken too long to answer because when she looked in his direction again, he was already moving towards her.

"Hey", he said. "Come on, let's get you to bed."

"Is that why you came?" She tried to joke, but it came out more like a murmur.

He smiled at her "You wish, sweet cheeks," he replied, also joking, but she knew he didn't mean it.

She started moving towards her bedroom. He followed her, still hesitant about being in her personal space.

She walked right through her bedroom, not caring that he might see that bra she had thrown in a corner a few days prior or her boxing gloves hanging on the doorknob of her closet. With her mind still swimming in a sea of exhaustion, she ran right into the wooden door that led to the bathroom. Shit, she really wasn't anywhere near awake.

He was right behind her, helping her stay standing, keeping her from falling in every sense of the word. Without a word, he opened the door for her and led her inside. As if it was the most natural thing in the world. He then helped her undress and redress in the pajamas that lay on her shelf, his gaze never once wavering from her eyes or her hands, never touching her anywhere inappropriate.

"All set?" He said when she was all dressed again. She turned to face him. His face held a compassionate expression. She nodded and he brought up one hand to cup the side of her face. "Come on then," he said. She took his hand in hers and led him to her bed. Just before she could get in she realized that he was still fully dressed. Reluctantly, she let go of his hand again. She turned around and was just about to ask him to stay when his face lit up. "You don't even have to ask, sweet cheeks," he smiled. Sighing, she crawled into bed and groaned as she lay down. It only hurt if you let it, and she did not have any energy left to stop from showing how much her muscles and joints ached. She half expected him to make a comment about it but all he did was get into bed beside her, turn off the light and then search for her hand again. "I'll be right here," he told her.

She gave his hand a light squeeze, "I remember. Ani lo levad."

That last bit is supposed to be Hebrew I think you know what it's supposed to mean(I don't speak Hebrew though).