Remember When Life Was Tender

by SevenBee

A night of insomnia gets the newly named John Smith and his darling wife, Rose Smith talking. When she asks about Gallifrey, he agrees to tell her. During his story, he reflects on how his best friends became his enemies.

Title: Remember When Life Was Tender.

Author: SevenBee

Summary: A night of insomnia gets the newly named John Smith and his darling wife, Rose Smith talking. When she asks about Gallifrey, he agrees to tell her. During his story, he reflects on how his best friends became his enemies.

Characters: John Smith (Meta Crisis), Rose Tyler, The Doctor (Theta Sigma), The Rani (Ushas), The Master (Koschei), Romana, Susan, Rassilon, Lord Borus (There will be more)

Created Characters: Miranghi, Yelena, Jyr, Gallian

Pairings: John Smith/Rose Tyler, Theta/Ushas/Koschei, .Koschei/Ushas, Ushas/Theta, Theta/Koschei, The Doctor/Romana. (Yes I did think that was a lot of couples. Though there may be more)

Disclaimer: I don't own any characters of Doctor Who, all whom belong to BBC and the soul creators of the characters. Even the created characters were made with help.

Author's Notes: The beginning of the chapter is set during the 'The End of Time'. Also the title is a little stupid, but I actually thought in some way it fit with the story. It is a lyric from John Borrowman's – Try to Remember.

Prologue: Insomnia Night Tales

Dim moon light shone from their bedroom window, the sounds of soft breathing coming from the body that nuzzled against him. John Smith, or so he had now changed his name to lay upon the bed, the sheet covering the lower half of his body, his hands were under his head and his brown eyes were staring at the ceiling. He sighed, he couldn't fall asleep, and he had tried almost everything. Various tea's, counting sheep, trying some of the various pills Jackie had in the bathroom. Nothing seemed to work.

Usually straight after making love to Rose he would fall straight asleep, cuddling her tightly to his chest. But not tonight, he just couldn't make his eyes close. He had rolled around on his half of the bed, carefully as not to awake the sleeping beauty that was beside him. He lay on his right side for nothing but a minute then rolled to his left side, stayed there for a minute and a half before rolling onto his back. He was most comfortable there, but his arms were not. He couldn't decide whether to have them resting on his stomach, under his head or just by his side.

He had decided this was the biggest decision his ever had to make as a human. (That including marrying Rose.) Rolling off the bed and patted his way out of the room and headed down the stairs and into the kitchen. He grabbed a glass from the cupboard, turned the tap on and watching the water that poured from it. He must have been distracted since he hadn't turned the tap off, his glass over filling with water. Once he had drunk the water and cleaned the spillage, he went back up the stairs and into his room. The sleeping beauty no longer asleep. Instead she was smiling dreamily at him, her fringe covering her eyes.

He glanced to the clock behind her, 2:43am, and then back to her. "Good morning." He commented with a cheesy grin. She smiled again which soon turned into a yawn; she covered her mouth and patted the empty space beside her.

"Not exactly good, I don't fancy being up at 2:30 in the morning." She stated and rolled onto her back, her head still turned on him. She patted the empty space, reminding him that she wanted him on the bed with her. He took the order and lied back underneath the sheet. She immediately rolled and cuddled herself to his chest. He wrapped an arm around her. "Can't sleep?" She asked.

Even in the darkness, Rose could see him nod. He took a deep breath before answering her. "I think I have insomnia." He said to her. "I've never really had insomnia before…I don't think I like it." He turned his head to her when he heard her giggle softly. He smiled and kissed her head. His smile didn't last. "I think something is wrong. That can be the only reason why I'm not able to sleep."

She frowned at his words, twisting her neck to see his face again. She didn't want to think about it, she didn't even want the name going across her mind, but it had. Could the Doctor be in trouble, is that a reason for why he can't sleep? He could feel the worry that worked its way onto her face and quickly pulled her tight to him. She inhaled, breathing in his scent. "But could it be? I mean, the other you, what if he is in trouble?"

John shook his head; he didn't want to think about it either. But of course she had asked. He was trying this new thing to answer every question she asked. He found it hard, and at times he would fall silent during mid-sentence, but as always, she was patient with him. "He can handle it. He always could." He comforted her, though his distant tone wasn't so comforting. He didn't even need to look at her to know she was beginning to look worried again.

Silence fell over the couple, Rose staring out the window whilst John was staring up at the ceiling. Both were thinking of him. Hoping he was alright. Rose shifted in John's arms; she prodded herself up, and leaned against the bed head. "John, can you tell me about your life on your home planet?" Her voice was innocent, almost child-like.

He moved himself and sat up, looking into her soft hazel eyes. "Rose…I…" He couldn't possibly tell her…could he? Everything about Gallifrey, the Time Lords/Ladies, the two warm suns, the beautiful yellow sky that matched her hair, the wonderful red grass that matched the Academy robes or even the story of how his best friends grew to loath him? He looked down at his hands; they were fiddling with the sheet. He also noted that Rose wasn't speaking; she was waiting for his answer. He took a deep breath. She would understand, she wouldn't mention it to anyone. It would be their little secret. He had nothing to worry about if he did tell her. She would understand.

"Rose, understand that I've never told anyone about Gallifrey." He could see her hazel eyes light up at the name. He smiled softly, and so did she. He took another deep breath, he could see in her eyes she wanted to know. He had always known she was curious about his life on Gallifrey, about the Time Lords. He paused, just getting lost in her eyes for a second. She would understand. He nodded his head and opened his mouth. Ready to spill his life into the woman he loved.

{ ------- }

When everyone spoke of heading to Earth's equivalent of Primary School, they spoke of seeing Time itself, that being highlight of being 30 years old, the vortex swirling. Yes, it hurt, but it formed friendships, it formed life. It's when you realize what you want to be. A Time Lord…or Lady. However, there weren't many women. It was rare, most of the females stayed on Gallifrey, never once searching the stars unless given the order by the High Council.

For Theta Sigma, he knew the moment he felt the Vortex staring back at him, he knew then he wanted to be a Time Lord. He wanted to travel the stars, to visit planets, to meet new and interesting species. He wanted to be an adventurer. He didn't care if one needed a certain amount of grades, a full license to control a TARDIS, or even a degree in Universal Economics. He just wanted to travel.

There was another boy who wanted to be a Time Lord, Koschei his name was, a young and very playful kid. Very unlike the shy Theta who watched the boy play around in the red fields. He always wondered why Koschei would come to the red fields to play; it was a great distance from the great city. The High Lords didn't even come out this far and Theta thought there was a reason for it. Clearly not if Koschei spent most of his free time running around in circles.

The blonde boy had noticed that the shy boy from his class had followed him. He had stopped and flashed a grin towards Theta. "Do you want to play?" Koschei asked, he still wore that innocent smile, it was inviting, without even noticing, Theta had began to walk towards him.

"What are you playing?" Theta asked, he stopped only a few short feet from Koschei. He had never really spoken to the boy before, this was something new. Perhaps a new friend?

"Well…I pretend I'm flying around in my TARDIS, visiting planets!" As he spoke he began to make a 'woo' sound as he spun around in circles. Theta just laughed. He stopped and turned back to the brunette boy. "I'm Koschei." He introduced.

"Theta."

The two boys grinned at each other before they began to play in the red fields. Both making a sound that they thought a TARDIS would make and began to imagine traveling around the universe. This was the start of their life. The start of their friendship, neither one knew how it was going to end. And only at the young age of 30, they didn't care. As long as they were together, playing, they knew life was going to be great.

To be continued