Follow Through.
Chapter One
This picks up where "Revelations" left off and shows how I may have continued the story. Probably pretty clichéd but give me a chance, it is my first post. Please be nice when commenting on it.
Reid reached down and slipped his hand into Henkel's pocket, careful not to be seen. Looking up, he slipped the two vials into his own pocket and limped away towards Gideon who had his hand held out to him.
Half an hour later, he was sitting on a hospital bed waiting to be checked over. He couldn't help but feel uneasy as he sat there, as if he'd just been violently ill. He had realized he had a very big problem on his hands. The team didn't know about the drugs Tobias had given him and Reid was debating whether or not to tell them. He knew the drugs were bad for him and the team could help him get over them but what would happen if he told them? Would he have his gun taken away…his badge too? Would they lock him up in rehab like his mother in Bennington and tell him it was the best place for him - whilst Hotch replaced him with some new, younger, better agent who wouldn't want to leave when or if he got himself better?
No, he wasn't going to let that happen. He knew it could; they replaced Elle, they could replace him too. A doctor walked in with salt and pepper hair and a tired face. He looked like he was near the end of his shift and just wanted to go home to the wife he never saw and who never let him forget it. Perfect.
"A mister Reid is it?" he said wearily, consulting the file in his hands.
"Doctor Reid, but yes," Spencer replied, his voice a bit too high. Just calm down, don't mess up, he thought.
"Little young to be a doctor, aren't you?"
"PhD's, three of them. So, yeah. Actually as you can probably tell I've had a rough couple of days."
"No kidding."
"But I don't think I'm really hurt. Just bruises really. You don't think we could hurry this up a bit, do you? It's just all I want to do is go home and have a bath. I'd really appreciate it."
"You do look like you've had a hard time of it. FBI, aren't you? Bit worried about the boss then, eh? Don't want to get laid off for a year, that it?" He smiled knowingly at him and Reid gave him an attempt at a smile back. "Thank you for long work hours" Reid thought to himself.
"I get the picture. I'll get a nurse to clean that cut on your head up and have a word with your bosses."
"Thanks man, I appreciate it." The doctor beckoned over a nurse and wandered off with a yawn.
Twenty nerve wracking minutes later and he was all sewn up. He was just picking up his things and nearly out the door when he turned to leave and saw Gideon in the doorway. Reid jumped and dropped the cup of coffee he was holding.
"Sorry, didn't mean to shock you. You alright?" said Gideon, quietly.
"Yeah I'm fine. It's OK." He paused, not knowing quite what to do. "So the doctor says I can go home." He stuttered. Damn, Gideon would see right through him, he knew it.
"Yeah," he replied and kept looking at him with those sad eyes that mad him feel so vulnerable. "You want a ride to the hotel?" Still those sad eyes. Oh God, he knows.
"Yeah that would be great, thanks Gideon," Reid stuttered and hurried out of the room.
Gideon stayed in the doorway and watched him scurry off, so nervous. Was he hiding something, or was it just his reaction to what he'd been through? One way or the other, they would have to keep an eye on him from now on.
The ride back to the hotel they would stay in for the night until they could fly back to Washington in the morning was made in silence. Reid ached all over. He was tired and hungry and felt a bit light headed and out of it, as if he wasn't quite touching the ground. All he wanted to do was sink in a bath and sleep. He could hardly believe what happened to him less than an hour ago was anything but a crazy dream and half expected to wake up at any minute.
Gideon watched him out of the corner of his eye. Reid's eyes had a glazed look, conveying more than just shock at what had happened to him. It made Gideon wonder. Yet, who was he to question the doctor's diagnosis. He had checked Reid over and discharged him, although he had seemed a little distracted.
"When we get back to the hotel do you want me to order room service while you get cleaned up and we can have dinner together?"
Reid was pulled out of the almost sleep he'd been in. "Sorry, what was that?"
"I said do you want to have dinner after you've cleaned up?"
"Oh, no thanks Gideon. If it's alright with you, I'll just get something small and go to bed. I'm pretty wiped."
"If that's what you want." Gideon carried on watching Reid for a little longer.
"Spencer, are you really OK? Because it's alright to say if you aren't. No one expects you to be alright so soon, not after what you've been through…we were all worried about you, especially when you had that seizure..." Reid shifted uncomfortably in the passenger seat, twisting his hands in his lap. "Thanks Gideon I'll be OK. I just need to sleep." Gideon let the subject drop. It wouldn't do him any good to press the young man further.
Reid was practically sleep-walking as he entered the hotel. The rest of the team, who had been in the other SUV in order to give Reid a little space, were waiting in the hotel lobby for them. There were more hugs all round and then after a few minutes of reassurances that he was OK Reid made his excuses and left to find his room.
"Hey Reid, wait up. I'll come with you, make sure you're settled in." Morgan stepped into the elevator next to him.
"Oh, thanks."
Reid could feel Morgan's eyes on him. Had Gideon or Hotch asked his friend to keep an eye on him? The elevator seemed to be moving impossibly slowly. He prayed that Morgan would just leave him alone, wouldn't ask him questions - just escort him to his room and then leave him be. Oh no. He heard the intake of breath as Morgan got ready to speak. Maybe he noticed the sudden tension in him or a change in the way he stood but Morgan seemed to change his mind on what he was about to say.
"Hey, I know you said you're feeling OK, but you know that if you ever do need to talk, I'm here for you right? Don't hesitate, no matter what it's about, OK?"
"Yeah, OK thanks man." The elevator came to a stop and Reid practically raced out the door.
"Thanks for coming up with me. I'll be fine from here."
"You sure?" Morgan asked, but Reid was already striding down the corridor at a speed most people jog at.
Reid shut and locked the door to his room. Peace at last. On his own, safe from everything in the outside world. After closing the blinds and making sure the windows were locked twice and re-checking the door at least three times he finally sat down on the bed and fell back against the pillows. The experience still felt unreal to him. Things like this didn't happen to him. If it wasn't for the ache all over his body, he would have sworn it didn't. He was desperately tired, but he had to get out of these clothes. He had to get clean and warm and eat something that tasted good and hadn't been poached from a nearby farm by a homicidal maniac.
He made a call to room service and ordered spaghetti in a plain tomato sauce. He was told the wait was 45 minutes so ran a bath while he waited. Reid lowered himself into the glorious warmth of the water and it felt like someone had just pushed away all the aches in his body. Sliding down and resting his head against the rim of the tub, Tobias Henkel and his cabin were nothing but a distant, barely remembered dream.
Reid was under the tree again. He felt the ache in his bones and the chill on his neck from the wind drying his sweat and he knew Henkel was there.
"You will pay for your sins" the strange young but old man said. This was Charles. Reid saw the gun rise up and he seemed to watch the bullet as it flew through the air towards him. It hit him but he didn't feel it, he just seemed to plummet down to the grave he'd dug, then, the newly turned earth began to fall into the hole and onto Reid by the shovelful. It clogged his nose, his mouth, his ears, and beyond it all a faint tap…tap….tap.
Reid pitched forwards, coughing and spluttering, to the sound of room service knocking on the door. It took him a second to orient himself, but then he hurled himself out of the bath and hastily pulled on his boxers and a shirt. The knocking on the door was getting insistent and the delivery person was shouting to see if he was in. He hurried to the door and paid for the food.
"Sorry, was in the shower," he muttered. Gideon came to the door as the porter left, roused by the continued knocking.
"Yeah, I was just in the shower," Reid repeated. Gideon gave him a funny look but only said "Why don't I take care of dinner while you get dressed." Reid was going to tell him that he was fine but Gideon was already closing the door.
After a quick towel down they sat down to eat, Spencer with his pasta and Jason with a Ham and Cheese sandwich. Reid avoided his eyes. He could just imagine Gideon suddenly demanding to see his arms, having seen right through Reid's attempted deceptions, genius profiler that he is. But no such thing happened. They merely sat and ate in uncomfortable silence.
Gideon was trying to figure out what it was that made Reid so nervous all of a sudden around him. When they'd found him at the cabin he'd been relieved to see them but now he was on edge, flinching at any interaction. Morgan had relayed the same behavior after their brief time in the elevator and Gideon didn't know what he meant. Well, maybe he was starting to get an inkling now watching Reid scratch at his arms and fidget, eyes darting about all over the room except at him. He was getting worse as time went on.
Reid had been ravenous before but now that he actually had food in front of him he couldn't eat it. He pushed it around on his plate and messed with it but the thought of it going in his mouth, sitting in his stomach, made him want to vomit. He had an idea why and what he had to do to fix it. Just once more until he was rested up and had the willpower to fight it.
"I think I'm going to try and get some shut eye now. I'm wiped out thanks for coming over, I appreciate it. I'll see you in the morning." Gideon nodded but didn't move.
"Spencer, you know you can talk to me." Reid nodded. "About anything," Jason continued "and I won't judge you, you won't be penalized in any way." Reid examined the space over Gideon's shoulder minutely as he nodded wordlessly. Gideon nodded to himself and stood to leave.
With a last sad look at the vulnerable man cowering like a dog before him he turned and left, able to hear Reid checking the locks over again on the door. Striding over to Hotch's door he rapped against the wood and waited for it to swing open to a decidedly tired-looking Hotch.
"Hey, want to get a drink?"
"Let me get my coat." They took the elevator down to the hotel bar and both ordered beers.
"I just went down to see him after room service was left knocking for ten minutes and his excuse was he was in the shower."
"Was he?"
"I think so but I'm in the room next door and I heard a lot of banging and shouting so I'm not so sure that's all that happened. I was going to ask him about it but when I saw him I felt like I shouldn't, at least not yet. He looked panicked when he saw me and all he did when I was in his room was avoid looking at me."
"He's been through a terrible ordeal. He's going to have some effects of that to deal with."
"He was shaking, his eyes were darting about everywhere and when I left I heard him rattling the locks and then coming back and checking them at least three times. There's something not right about him, I know it is only his first few hours back but I can tell something is wrong." There was a break as they looked at each other seriously over their untouched beers.
"We shouldn't jump to conclusions. We got him back just a few hours ago. Let's give him a few days and see if he changes."
"We need to be careful with him"
"Yeah." Hotch agreed.
A few feet above the hotel bar, Reid stared at the little glass bottles in his hand and slipped the needle he'd taken from the hospital into his arm.