The Story of Neal and The Orange
Once upon a time, Neal was eating an orange. It was a nice orange. Nothing wrong with it really. Except that it was an orange. Which meant that it was orange. And Neal didn't like orange. He liked green. Neal decided to set off on a quest to find a green orange to suit his fruit color needs. He decided to go somewhere between east and west, they were sure to have green oranges there.
On the way he met a badger. "Hello, badger," he said, "Nice day for galoshes, isn't it?" The badger replied by blinking twice then promptly returing to being a badger. Neal sang a few verses of a song about badgers, each line ending in a word that ryhmed with "green." Neal then returned to his search.
It wasn't long before Neal met a group of people hugging treese. "Hello," he said.
"Hi," they said.
"Who are you?"
"Treehuggers. We hug trees."
"Oh, jolly. Trees are green."
"Yes, would you like to join us?"
"I'd better not. My tree at home might get jealous." Neal thought fondly of his green tree waiting for him at home.
"We believe all trees are equal. You shouldn't value one tree above the rest. All trees are special."
"Well, I am a bit old fashioned." Neal continued on his way.
Neal was walking. Then Neal stopped walking. He saw a store. Despite his manly instincts to plunge randomly through the forsests, he decided to ask for directions. "Excuse me, can you help me?"
"I can sell you some paper." Said a cat. The cat apparently owned the store.
"Oh...does it come in green?"
"Yes." Neal giggled and tapdanced with joy.
"Wait...where does paper come from?" Neal asked. If there was a special place where ordinary paper came in green, maybe that place had oranges that came in green too.
"Trees."
"Wow! There are paper trees?"
"...yes."
"Can you tell me where to find them? The green paper trees, that is."
"Just walk in any direction. For a long time. Just about anywhere far away from here."
"Thanks!"
"Don't speak. Walk."
Neal was overjoyed. Not only had he found out where to find green oranges, he had also found a nickel. The nickel's name was Alfonso. Alfonso was a very nice nickel.
Before long, Neal found a tree. Not only a tree, but a green tree. He tapdanced some. Does this look like a green orange tree to you, Alfonso? The nickel nodded in spanish. Neal threw Alfonso into the tree. A green banana fell out. "Wow" said Neal. "This looks like a banana. Only it's green. Everyone knows bananas don't come in green. It must be an orange."
Neal ate the green orange and many more. He decided to live with this wonderous fruit tree and with his bride, Alfonso. They had three children. One later became addicted to maple syrup and is now in rehab.
The End.
Once upon a time, Neal was eating an orange. It was a nice orange. Nothing wrong with it really. Except that it was an orange. Which meant that it was orange. And Neal didn't like orange. He liked green. Neal decided to set off on a quest to find a green orange to suit his fruit color needs. He decided to go somewhere between east and west, they were sure to have green oranges there.
On the way he met a badger. "Hello, badger," he said, "Nice day for galoshes, isn't it?" The badger replied by blinking twice then promptly returing to being a badger. Neal sang a few verses of a song about badgers, each line ending in a word that ryhmed with "green." Neal then returned to his search.
It wasn't long before Neal met a group of people hugging treese. "Hello," he said.
"Hi," they said.
"Who are you?"
"Treehuggers. We hug trees."
"Oh, jolly. Trees are green."
"Yes, would you like to join us?"
"I'd better not. My tree at home might get jealous." Neal thought fondly of his green tree waiting for him at home.
"We believe all trees are equal. You shouldn't value one tree above the rest. All trees are special."
"Well, I am a bit old fashioned." Neal continued on his way.
Neal was walking. Then Neal stopped walking. He saw a store. Despite his manly instincts to plunge randomly through the forsests, he decided to ask for directions. "Excuse me, can you help me?"
"I can sell you some paper." Said a cat. The cat apparently owned the store.
"Oh...does it come in green?"
"Yes." Neal giggled and tapdanced with joy.
"Wait...where does paper come from?" Neal asked. If there was a special place where ordinary paper came in green, maybe that place had oranges that came in green too.
"Trees."
"Wow! There are paper trees?"
"...yes."
"Can you tell me where to find them? The green paper trees, that is."
"Just walk in any direction. For a long time. Just about anywhere far away from here."
"Thanks!"
"Don't speak. Walk."
Neal was overjoyed. Not only had he found out where to find green oranges, he had also found a nickel. The nickel's name was Alfonso. Alfonso was a very nice nickel.
Before long, Neal found a tree. Not only a tree, but a green tree. He tapdanced some. Does this look like a green orange tree to you, Alfonso? The nickel nodded in spanish. Neal threw Alfonso into the tree. A green banana fell out. "Wow" said Neal. "This looks like a banana. Only it's green. Everyone knows bananas don't come in green. It must be an orange."
Neal ate the green orange and many more. He decided to live with this wonderous fruit tree and with his bride, Alfonso. They had three children. One later became addicted to maple syrup and is now in rehab.
The End.