Thank you BlissAndHurricanes, MartyMac 49, midnitetryst, Ilovetea, Calypsoh, and guest for your kind reviews. I'm sorry I couldn't figure out how to reply to you all.
Ilovetea, this isn't a second chapter to my first fic but it is a follow-up and I hope it doesn't disappoint. It is AU and I wouldn't expect something like this to happen on the show, but hopefully it's not too OOC. -Bonnie
The Walls are Crumbling
He's going to kill him. I know it. If I don't stop him, Jane is going to put a bullet through Red John's skull. I'll have to arrest him, just like I said I would years ago. He won't get away with murder a second time, not again. I have to talk him down, but how? I have no idea what to say. What do you say to a man who's been hunting the murderer of his family for over a decade? How am I supposed to convince him that this, what he wants to do to Red John, isn't going to magically make what happened all those years ago disappear? It won't take away the hurt. It won't help his family, they're gone. And I know that, from what I've gathered about her over the years, Angela wouldn't want this for him. She wouldn't want Jane to throw away the rest of his life by murdering Red John.
Huh. Well, what do you know; I guess I do know what to say to him. I can only hope he'll listen.
I lower the gun I've had pointed at Jane for what seems like an eternity, it certainly won't help in this situation. Cho's got Red John covered so no worries there.
"Jane." I try to keep the fear I feel out of my voice. "Jane, please, put the gun down."
"You know I can't do that Lisbon."
He doesn't look away from the killer in front of him. His eyes are darkened with the hatred he feels for this man, like how rain clouds darken the skies.
"Yes, you can Jane. I know you can," I insist, but he doesn't waver.
Alright, different approach.
"Jane, if you pull that trigger you'll be no different than him."
I berate myself as soon as the words leave my mouth. Teresa, what are you thinking? That old line will never work.
Jane shakes his head and smiles in a sarcastic manner. Apparently he thinks so too.
"That's hardly original is it Lisbon? Besides, have you forgotten? I've already killed a man once before."
I kick myself mentally. Idiot Reese, you're such an idiot. But I won't give up on him that easily, I can't. I have to find a way to reach him.
Taking a deep breath, I step in front of Jane and the gun, forcing him to look at me. Then I say something that could be either the best decision I can make in this situation, or the worst mistake possible.
"I won't ask you to do this for me Jane, because you probably wouldn't even if I did."
Don't get too smart with the reverse psychology there hot-shot, I reign myself in a bit.
"I'm asking you to do it for them. Do it for Angela and Charlotte. Do it for your family. You know they wouldn't want you to waste the rest of your life in a jail cell because of him." I nod my head in Red John's direction.
Jane's resolve seems to waver a bit, or maybe I'm just seeing things.
I continue. "You know that don't you?" I don't wait for a response but go straight for the jugular.
"If the roles had been reversed, if you had died instead of them, would you have wanted the path you've made for yourself to be theirs? Would you have wanted Angela to stay stuck in a rut for the rest of her life?"
I knew I was getting through to him now. His eyes broke contact with mine. The gun in his hand was shaking slightly.
Time to go for the kill.
"What about your daughter? Would you have wanted her to hunt down your killer and ruin all chances of her ever having a normal life? Would you have wished that on either of them?"
His answer is so quiet I almost miss it.
"No."
He raises his eyes to meet mine, a new resolve showing on his face.
"No."
I can hear him loud and clear this time, his voice is firm.
I hold out my hand.
"Then give me the gun."
He looks at the firearm in his hand, momentarily hesitant, but then, his new determination shows itself again and he places the weapon in my waiting hand.
I smile at my partner. He smiles back.
I can't believe it. Everything is falling into place perfectly. We have Red John, Jane isn't going to jail for murder, I just can't believe -
I feel it before the sound really has time to register. The pain in my side. I can't breath. I think I've been stabbed, but I heard a shot. I should be feeling a bullet, not a blade.
Red hot pain is running through me. I feel myself fall, like I'm being pulled down by a dead weight, -my dead weight. My eyes are losing focus; -I'm going to pass out. I'm just about to surrender to the black closing in on my vision, but I can hear something. -What is that? -I try to concentrate.
Laughter, -it's laughter, saturated with the horrible sound of gurgling liquid.
Now the laughter has stopped.
"You lose, Patrick."
It's Red John. Cho shot Red John. That has to be where the shot came from. It couldn't have been Jane; I still have his gun in my left hand.
I can't stay awake, it's too hard. The darkness is so thick I feel like I could reach out and grab onto it. I start to do just that, but I don't grab anything, something grabs me. It's warm, soft, -a hand. I feel another hand at the base of my skull, it's gentle. It lifts my head up a little, and then, lowers it again. I don't come back to rest on the hard floor. It feels like a -someone's lap. I hear a frightened sounding voice calling my name, -it's Jane's
He's telling me to stay awake, but I can't, it's too hard to keep the black out. I have to give in to it, -I have to.
Now I'm falling, -falling, falling. -I land on something soft, and then, -nothing.
Nothing. There's been nothing for weeks. Maybe she won't wake up.
No. I stop my train of thought forcefully. She will wake up. She will. She's got to. There's no way she's going to die. Not after everything we've been through together. I won't let her.
"You won't let her," something inside me says, "as if you have anything to do with it. If she died right now, you couldn't do a thing about it."
I will myself to shut up, I have to keep my mind from thinking about the possibility that Lisbon may die. If I don't, I'll lose it, go completely wacko.
So my mind turns to something else, something that is very familiar to me. -guilt.
"You did this to her," the same voice says. "You might as well have stabbed her yourself. It's your fault she's dying."
And we're back to dying.
No, she's going to make it. I know she will. She's the strongest person I've ever known, barring none. She'll pull through.
I've spent every minute I can with her. I know it doesn't do any good to wait around. The doctors are keeping her in a medically induced coma and I don't know when they're going to bring her out of it, but it just makes me feel better to be here. To hear the machines that are telling me she's still alive, that I haven't lost her. And I'm not going to lose her.
They're going to wake her up any day now. I'm sure of it. And when they do I'm going to tell her. I'm going to tell her that I love her, and I won't "forget" about it this time. In fact, I'm going to ask her to marry me. Not right away, of course, I don't want to give the poor woman a heart attack. She'll have to get used to the idea that I'm in love with her first. So, a few weeks, at least.
I feel excited. I'm not sure what she'll say, -about marrying me I mean. I know she loves me, so there are no worries about my love being unrequited, but I really don't know if she'll want to marry me. I wouldn't, if I was her, and that makes me thank my lucky stars she's nothing like me. She's so much better. She wouldn't love me if she wasn't.
I suppose it's foolish to be making plans when I don't know, for sure, if I'll get her back, but I've never been known for being particularly sensible. So why start now?
They're bringing her out of the coma today. I feel like my heart's going to pump right out of my chest. Its beats are shaking my entire being, even though outwardly, I'm as steady as the proverbial rock.
I can't be all wobbly when Teresa wakes up. A man who is intending to tell a woman he loves her wants to, at least, keep his hands from quivering like poplar leaves.
I'm not sure how I'm going to tell her, but I think the best course of action will be to just let it flow into the conversation however it sees fit. Sincere yet casual, -yes perfect.
I can hardly wait 'till she wakes up. I haven't seen my Lisbon's eyes in weeks and I miss them. I miss her.
He was sitting just outside her hospital room door with the allusion of patience set firmly on his face, when the doctor came to tell him he could go in. Jane kept the calm façade he was sporting resolutely in place. Inside he was a quaking mass of jelly.
Stepping into Lisbon's room, he shut the door with a quiet click. He walked across the floor, stopped by the bed, and pulled up a chair.
She didn't seem to be awake, but Jane knew she was. He'd been watching her sleep for weeks, he was pretty sure he could tell the difference by now.
"Hey you, I know you're awake," he said quietly, a smirk on his face.
Lisbon responded by turning her head so she was facing him.
He sighed with relief at the sight of her soft green eyes.
"Oh you have no idea how good it is to see your eyes again, Lisbon."
She smiled at him softly, rather weakly, but it was unbelievably beautiful to Jane.
"There for a while I thought I'd never see them again."
"You almost didn't." Lisbon's voice was raspy from underuse and quiet, like it took too much energy to make it any louder. "I was lucky he got me where he did."
Jane's gaze fell away from hers, and his expression clouded somewhat at the mention of Red John.
"What happened Jane?"
"He got the drop on us, he hurt you, Cho shot him, you were rushed to the hospital, and he's dead."
She looked at him reproachfully.
"You know what I mean Jane."
The consultant brought his eyes level with hers once more.
"He's gone Lisbon. What do the details matter now?"
"Don't they matter to you?"
She sounded confused.
"No. No they don't. There's only one thing that matters to me right now Teresa, and that's you."
She couldn't help it; Lisbon had to look away from the burning intensity in Jane's eyes. It frightened her, thrilled and frightened her. She didn't know which emotion would win out.
"Oh," was all the response she could give him. Her breath seemed to have been robbed from her lungs, making her feel like a fish out of water.
Jane knew that she knew what he was essentially saying. He also knew she didn't know what to feel about it. So he didn't say anything. He simply took her small hand in his and placed a warm kiss on her open palm.
Lisbon had never experienced such a purely loving gesture in her life, not that she could remember anyway. And just like that, thrill won over fright.
She turned back to face him. The feeling she saw in his blue-green eyes sent a warm surge through her entire body, and without thinking about it, she allowed the same feeling to flow into her own eyes.
Jane had seldom seen Lisbon's emotional walls give way to any significant extent, and he had certainly never seen them collapse completely, but here they were, crumbling before his very eyes. It was beautiful, and he couldn't stop what came out of his mouth next, didn't want to either.
"I love you."
Lisbon took as deep a breath as she could manage without too much pain, and answered him.
"I love you too."