Personally, I thought this was crappy…let me know what you think about it though.
Disclaimer: I don't own Tales of Symphonia. That is for Namco.
Doubts
By: Sango Taijiya-san
I think…I want to cry.
The thing is, I don't understand why I would want to. But it doesn't really matter though, because the Journey of Regeneration is coming to an end, so even if I wanted to cry, I can't…
No, I shouldn't want to, nor need to cry, because I should be happy now. My travels are coming to an end, and I'm about to regenerate this world, so everyone will be able to live in prosperity now. Yes, people won't die anymore, because my life will save everyone on Sylverant and I'll finally fulfill the prophecy.
But at the same time, I feel scared. I don't want my life to end like this. Am I selfish for wanting to live? Am I selfish for putting my life before thousands and thousands of others? After all, I was just born for the sole purpose of being a sacrifice…
So…is it right for me to keep on living? No, it isn't right…because many people there are awaiting the regeneration of the world, so everyone can stop suffering. Maybe then, people will actually be happy…
Yes, I'm certain that they'll be happy, because the Desians will be gone too. Others won't need to suffer, because that was the reason I was born. To give salvation to everyone. And maybe someday, all these conflicts will halt and everyone will be able to live out their lives in peace.
That…is what I really want. For everyone get along, or at the very least, accept those that are living here and now. And someday, maybe the world will be filled with smiles…
That's why I'm doing what I can right now. So the world can finally be at peace, and so people will not have to be sad. And if I can accomplish this, I will. Even if it means sacrificing myself, then I will, if it is for the sake of many others.
But. What will happen to Sheena's world if I do this? Will it really…turn into a land like Sylverant? Will the people living there start to suffer too? But then the deaths in that world will be my fault, and…the problem isn't really solved at all…
This is the only thing I can do though. The only way I can assure Sylverant to be saved is to give up my life…but if I do, Sheena's world will become like this and…I'll be breaking a promise.
I'm confused. What should I do? Whatever decision I make seems to lead to the destruction of one world or another, and I don't want either of them to be destroyed. Too many lives have been lost already, and we don't need anymore people dying…
I wish…that I could save both worlds. That the mana in my body can spread amongst both worlds and enable both of them to live in peace and happiness. The only thing I can do is hope that my sacrifice will help everyone in both worlds, and my friend will continue living long after I become an angel.
It's for the best, I think. I won't be a burden to anyone anymore and the regenerated world will let everyone live without meaningless suffering everywhere.
I've decided. I'll become an angel, so that everyone that I care about will not suffer. Everyone…thank you for helping me. And although it might hurt you a bit when I disappear, it's for the best…and that's why…I'll try to smile. Until the very end.
I'll be happy, because my wish will be fulfilled. So I won't need to cry anymore.
…But if that's so, why do the tears still feel like they're coming…?
Owari
Yay, I managed to finish another one-shot. Whoooooo. R&R please.