Harry Potter Fights the Evil Racist Sexist Donald Trump
Chapter 1: Trump Nukes Hogwarts
Once upon a time, there was this wizard kid named Harry Potter. He was a happy wizard and went to a wizard school called Hogwarts. It was peaceful and very nice.
And then, the evil President of the United States of America, Donald J. Trump, changed all that. Trump ordered a nuke to be dropped on Hogwarts, because he deemed the school "too liberal" and "too SJW" to deserve to exist in the growingly conservative America. So, Trump's nazi army flew by and utterly destroyed Hogwarts with hundreds upon millions of atomic nukes. The buildings of Hogwarts fell down and crumbled, and most of the wizards there died. A few lucky wizards managed to escape by flying on their brooms, but Harry almost wasn't one of the lucky wizards.
Harry was under the fire and coughing smoke. "Cough! Cough!" coughed Harry. Suddenly, a strong Asian karate man with spikey hair was riding on a small cloud in the sky, and he swooped down towards Harry. "Hey!" said the man, "Let me save you, kid!" Harry let the man take him for a ride, and Harry and the man managed to escape the burning, crumbling Hogwarts.
"My name is Goku!" said the man cheerfully. "My name is Harry Potter," said Harry, "And Donald Trump destroyed my school and murdered all my friends!" Goku and Harry were flying on the cloud through the skies. "Don't worry!" said Goku, "I promise you we'll give Donald Trump a taste of justice!"
Goku and Harry landed at Green Hill Zone, and there they met two more warriors. "My name is Sonic!" said a blue hedgehog, "Sonic the Hedgehog!" Sonic turned his back around to show he was wearing the donkey tattoo, the symbol of the Democratic party. "I'm blue because I'm liberal," said Sonic, "And it's not cool to be conservative! Yuck!" "I'm Naruto!" said an orange jumpsuit-wearing blonde kid, "Believe it!" "Nice to meet you Naruto and Sonic," said Harry. Goku got out his dragon radar. "Harry," Goku said, "Me and my friends Naruto and Sonic need to have a talk with you about what's going on!"
Later, Goku, Harry, Naruto, and Sonic were all in a hut as Goku lectured, "So, you all know why we're meeting here, right?" "No?" Harry asked. "Well," Goku said, "Ever since Donald Trump won his third term, he's been bent on becoming president of the United States for eternity!" Naruto got scared at just hearing this idea. "But isn't that illegal?" Sonic asked. "Yes," Goku said, "But Hitler tried to be leader of Germany forever, and Hitler is Trump's life idol and role model, his hero, so Trump doesn't care what American law says, he wants to use America to force fascism upon the American people and turn everyone into alt-right neo Nazis!" Harry asked, "What about 4chan? Why are they supporting Trump? How could they support such a monster of a man?" Goku explained, "4chan is an evil organization, they are working for Trump to take over the world and annihilate all the racial minorities, gay people, trans people, disabled people, autistic people, and non-Christians in the world so only straight-white-blonde-blue-eyed-conservative-Christian-men can be the dominant species of the world!" Naruto added, "I hate 4chan, they're a bunch of conservative bullies that like to make fun of anime fans because the 4channers see the anime fans as being 'anti-American' for enjoying foreign cartoons. 4chan and Trump must be destroyed!" "The alt-right is no better," Sonic said, "They not only hate non-white people and gay people, they also hate animals, they want all animals to be killed and eaten by white humans and they want vegetarianism to be illegal! They also want to kill anthromorphic-animals like me since they hate animals that much!" "It's settled," Goku said, "We will team up and destroy Trump and his dark army of conservatives, and spread social justice around the world!" "Yeah!" Harry, Sonic, and Naruto all said.
So, Goku, Harry Potter, Sonic the Hedgehog, and Naruto all went their way as a team to fight Trump and Trump supporters. Meanwhile, they found a couple alt-righters beating up a gay vampire. "Waaaaaaaaaa!" cried the vampire. "That's what you get for being gay!" laughed one of the alt-righters. "You're also not blonde and blue eyed like us!" laughed the other alt-righter. "Hey!" Harry screamed, "Leave that poor vampire alone!" "Kek!" laughed the alt-righters, "What are you, an SJW? Stop drinking the liberal kool aid, soy boy!" Harry then got really angry, so he got out his wand and shouted, "Abra-Kadabra!" and used his wand to shoot an electric bolt at one of the alt-righters, and the alt-righter was vaporized into ashes. "Ah well," said the other alt-righter still alive, "He was a soy boy anyways…"
"Hand over the vampire and we'll go easy on you!" shouted Naruto. "No way!" said the alt-righter, "Not until I give him a taste of GARLIC!" "You monster!" screamed Harry, "You know garlic is dangerous and kills vampires!" "I know!" said the alt-righter, "By giving him garlic, that means one less degenerate to keep Lord Trump's world clean from filth!" The alt-righter threw the garlic at the vampire's face, but the vampire didn't die. Instead, the vampire sparkled. "Kek," said the alt-righter, "Even vampires aren't safe from being feminized by liberal Hollywood!" "My name is Edward," said the vampire, "And I'll have you know that I am a hardcore feminist, and I don't tolerate sexist pigs like you mocking feminism!" "Kek," said the alt-righter, "Feminism is cancer and women belong in the kitchen!" Edward then turned into a bat, and shot lazers at the alt-righter, and the alt-righter was destroyed into sparkles.
"Hey Edward," said Harry, "I've heard a bit about ya…" "Same here Mr. Potter…" said Edward. The two shook hands. "Now," Goku said, "Who else is in trouble around here?" Suddenly, Harry and friends saw an evil conservative running with a yellow mouse in his hands, as a young Asian boy with a hat was running behind him. "Hey!" screamed the boy, "Give me back my Pikachu!" "Ash Ketchum?" Goku thought, "He and his Pikachu would make great members in my anti-Trump team!" Goku then stopped the evil conservative in his tracks. "Where do you think you're going with that Pikachu?" Goku asked. "I'm gonna eat him ya stupid liberal!" growled the conservative. "That's sick!" Goku shouted, "I'm gonna defeat you!" Goku then went super saiyan, and then formed energy. "KAMEHAMEHA!" screamed Goku, as he blasted his Kamehameha wave at the conservative, and the conservative burned alive and turned into ash.
"Thanks for saving my Pikachu!" said Ash. "No problem!" Goku said. "Hey can I join your anti-Trump team?" asked Ash, "Me and my Pokemon can help fight Trump with you!" "Sure!" said Goku. Now, Goku and his team consisted of six members, which Goku felt was enough of an army to set out to defeat Trump. "Alright liberals," Harry Potter said, "Time to start our crusade to destroy Trump!"