Scars
It was good to be on Earth again.
For Keyla it was good to be on any planet again, period. It was nice to exist in non-artificial 1g conditions. It was nice to experience temperatures outside a constant 23 degrees Celsius. It was nice to breathe air that wasn't recycled. And it was nice to be able to walk down the streets of Geneva rather than the corridors of Discovery. Because, after all, home was home, and home was where the heart was. Or at least where Lieutenant Keyla Detmer was. Granted, home was technically Düsseldorf, but, well, same continent. It counted. After jumping across the galaxy with a spore drive with pinpoint accuracy, she figured that being slightly less accurate as far as "home" went was making up for the run of good fortune she and her crew had experienced up until now.
There was a chill in the air, but her sweater was keeping the worst of it at bay. Even then, she didn't mind. It was Earth. It was cold. It was normal, or at least, normal for the people of the Federation's capital world. People who could look up at the stars rather than flying around them. People that paid her no heed as they walked through the streets of Switzerland's capital, any more than they glanced at the occasional alien that passed their way as well. Vulcans, andorians, tellarites, betazoids, even the odd orion or two. Granted, there were probably more aliens here right now per the awards ceremony for the Discovery's crew, but the human race had shared their planet with non-humans for two centuries. So far it had worked out. She came to a bench and took a seat.
"Keyla?"
And almost shot straight back up, as she recognised the sound of the voice, and years of protocol that had been rammed into her like a nail through wood screamed at her to do so. Still, she resisted – not being in uniform helped.
"Commander Saru."
"Please Keyla, just Saru. We're not on the ship yet."
She smiled at the kelpien. "Yet? Looking forward to flying your baby out of dock?"
The smile was returned. "I do appreciate the flattery, but I'm only the acting captain. No doubt someone better qualified will take my place once we reach Vulcan."
"No doubt," Keyla said, before she realized how that sounded. Still, if Saru had been wounded by her words, he gave no sign.
"May I…"
"Oh, of course," she said. She shuffled over across the seat and made room. Saru took a seat, and even then, still towered above her. Out of the corner of her eye (her organic one), she noticed a few furtive stares from the passer-by's. Much as humans had become used to non-humans, Saru was the only kelpien in Starfleet, nay, the Federation. She doubted that anyone here even knew his species.
"How's Geneva treating you?" Keyla asked.
"Oh, fine, I assure you." He gestured to his suit – black, undersized, and not issued by Starfleet. "They somehow managed to find something approaching my specifications."
"Yes, they certainly did."
"A lie," Saru said with a smile. "But I appreciate the effort."
"I'm not lying," Keyla protested.
"Miss Detmer, the suit is too tight, and these trousers are too long." Saru tugged at them to prove his point. "Still, it matters little. Very soon, I will be wearing the uniform assigned to me by Starfleet."
"And back on duty," Keyla said.
"And back on duty," Saru repeated.
Keyla looked away and rubbed her hands together, for reasons other than just being cold. Discovery would be leaving soon. She was due at the city's spaceport at 2300 local time, and if she wasn't, well, chances were she shouldn't bother turning up at all. It was a bit of a tease, she supposed, coming back to Earth for pomp and circumstance only to head out amongst the stars. Granted, that was the life she'd chosen, but still…
"Do you miss home?" she asked Saru.
The kelpien looked at her. "Must you ask such a thing?"
"I…I didn't mean…"
"I don't take offence, but I will assure you that I do miss it," Saru said. He looked up at the sky above. "Not so many stars in the sky here, and even if not for the light pollution, they would look different to the ones on my homeworld." He shifted his gaze to Keyla. "Still, I can only imagine what it is like for you and so many other crewmembers of the Discovery. So many call this planet home, and yet they can only taste it briefly before returning back to the stars."
Keyla shrugged. "Life we chose."
Saru nodded. "The life you chose. Just as I did in a sense, though because of the ba'ul, I suppose…" He trailed off.
"Wasn't much of a choice?" Keyla murmured.
"Actually, it was a choice," Saru said. "Considering who I left behind. Still, the choice is made. I am a refugee within the Federation, a commander in Starfleet, and acting captain of the Discovery. These are privileges that your people have been good enough to give me, and I will be grateful for that until my dying day."
Keyla couldn't help but smile. Not so much at the flattery (though that did play a role, she wasn't completely immune to being buttered up), but for seeing Saru happy. She couldn't remember seeing him sound and talk like this since the Battle of the Binary Stars, when all of this began.
"I suppose if we're talking about choices, then it might be prudent of me to ask what compelled you to join Starfleet," Saru said. "I mean, if that isn't intruding."
"Oh no, not at all," Keyla said. "I mean, well, simple – wanted to go into space, wanted to see space, Starfleet's the best way of seeing space." She shrugged. "Not much of a story I'm afraid."
"I'm sure there's a story to be told in the Academy."
"One no different from any other cadet. Still…" She looked up at the night sky. At the stars, and the moon, shining not just from the light of the sun, but the lunar colonies. "You know, it's almost going to be strange, being out there again. Actually discovering things rather than fighting a war. Like…" She trailed off, her cybernetic eye twitching.
"Keyla?"
Oh shit. She'd just gone blind in her left eye.
"Keyla, are you alright?"
"Fine," she said. "Just gimme a moment." She began tapping her ocular implant.
"Keyla, I don't think that's how it's supposed to work."
"My eye, my rules, my…" She gave it a final poke, and her vision returned to normal. "Ah, there we go." She looked back at Saru. "See? Perfect."
"I suppose so."
He didn't look convinced, and Keyla knew that that was down to no fault in her vision. "Saru, you don't need to worry. I'm used to it."
"Oh, I don't doubt that. Still, we all carry scars, and…" He gestured to her eye, and the graft that covered her burnt skin. "Well, some are more visible than others."
"Saru, are you saying I'm ugly?"
"What? No, of course not."
"Insinuating that beauty is skin deep?"
"Miss Detmer, I would never assume to-"
"Kidding," she laughed, giving him a nudge. "Honestly Saru, you're on Earth, and you're getting the only shore leave available to you in months. Lighten up."
"I…will try to do so."
Keyla's smile fell. Saru, lightening up. He was cut off from his family. His homeworld was in the control of the ba'ul. She might have the scars of war, and would always do so, but Saru's were bottled up inside. And that could make them far worse.
"Y'know, I don't think I congratulated you," Keyla said.
"Hmm?"
"For the medal of honour you received."
"Keyla, I assure you, you congratulated me at least three times in the ceremony."
She blinked. "I did?"
"Yes, and that isn't even counting the congratulations I got from everyone else. Still, if you must congratulate me four times, I will therefore give you a fourth thank you."
She smiled. "Thank you."
"Thank you?"
"Yes, thank you."
"Thank you for what?"
"For…saying thank you?"
Neither of them said anything. Least not until she burst out laughing, and to her relief, so did Saru. It was a different pitch to her laugh, making sounds that she didn't think she or any other human was capable of, but it was a laugh all the same. And that did her some good.
Being on Earth, being at peace, being able to look up at the stars and not fear what lurked among them…that was all good.
And this moment before heading back to join them, this moment of serenity…that was good as well.