Ronon Dex found himself doing something he seldom ever did
The Runner and the Replicator.
Ronon Dex found himself doing something he seldom ever did. Standing alone on the East Pier, leaning on the railings and gazing out over the ocean, thinking. So much had happened since he had met Sheppard and Teyla, he was a runner for the Wraith for seven years after the destruction of Sateda, his home world, seven long years of running, hiding and killing before the team from Atlantis had set him free and taken him back with them to the city of the Ancestors.
When he had first met her, he didn't know what to say, he couldn't work out how she thought, and to be honest she terrified him. Now she was missing, presumed dead, and he had never had the chance to really get to know her, never really got the chance to find out what went on behind that beautiful enigmatic smile. He picked at an invisible blip on his thumb and flicked the offending invisible piece of skin into the air, shifting his weight slightly, he allowed his gaze to drift back to the horizon, perhaps secretly hoping that she would return, but sensing down inside she never would and feeling that coldness, so familiar, spreading up through his gut.
Thoughts continued to plague him, remembering when she was infected with the nanovirus, little mini replicators throughout her body. It had been Sheppard who had saved her, pulled her back from oblivion, while he had stood back and watched helplessly. He hated feeling that way, and yet Dr Elizabeth Weir made him feel like that continuously, never very sure of himself, and more than anything feeling like an uneducated slob in her presence. And yet, she had never, ever, intended him to feel that way.
Can Replicators ever sleep? Elizabeth doubted it, as she lay on her bed with sleep evading her now. She was Dr Elizabeth Weir, and yet she wasn't! It was all so confusing, she had Weir's memories, her thoughts, even her feelings and body, but she wasn't her. She was a complete carbon copy, so perfect that no one, not even Elizabeth's closest friends would be any the wiser, and yet she was not her. In her thoughts, RepliElizabeth remembered a tall impressive looking man, with long dreadlocks, a beard and a body that could melt even a Replicator's heart! Ronon Dex. She found herself thinking of him often. Dr Weir had had strange conflicting feelings for this man. She was immensely attracted to him, and yet unable to communicate with him. She, who had worked with some of Earth's highest ranking officials, had been completely floored by the giant Satedan, completely knocked off balance by him and now she would never be able to tell him how she had felt. "life sucks! Even for a replicator" she thought, tossing yet again on the narrow bed…no, Replicators can't sleep and they certainly can't fall in love!
"Ronon?" the voice was soft and gentle and Ronon turned his gaze from the ocean to look down at Teyla, standing at his elbow.
"Teyla" he answered, his eyes narrowing against the glare of the glass coming from behind her.
"Ronon, are you alright?"
"I'm fine," he lied, "why?"
"You miss Elizabeth, do you not?"
He wasn't going to deny it, what was the use, why lie to this girl who was like a sister to him?
"It's not the same without her" he replied, "I …." His voice trailed off, and Teyla lay her hand gently on his arm, "I too miss Dr Weir," she replied, "she was very kind"
Ronon hung his head in abject misery, "She gave me a chance" he answered hoarsely, "and I never got the chance to thank her".
Teyla sensed that her friend wanted to be alone with his thoughts, and after one final pat on his arm, she turned and left him alone.
Something inside him said she was still alive, but in his mind he knew it was some vague hope his heart clung to, a hope that he couldn't, didn't, want to let go. "Elizabeth". He said her name softly, and somewhere across the ocean his imagination heard the reply, whispered on the breeze, "Ronon".
He cursed silently, and walked away from the East Pier, following the route that Teyla had taken, too much thinking was bad for a guy!
It was daylight and RepliElizabeth sat at the helm of the battle cruiser, her crew around her at various stations. It was a new dawn for her and her comrades. Atlantis had destroyed the Replicators, those who had desired to take her life and the lives of her comrades, and had inadvertently set them free. Those living in the city of the Ancients knew nothing of their existence, but she was anxious for that to change.
"Everyone ready?" she asked, looking around at RepliSheppard, Mackay, Ronon and Teyla. Interesting, she thought briefly, that RepliRonon didn't hold the fascination for her that his "real" counterpart did and he, in turn, had no interest in her. It was like something that was imagined or remembered, something from her past. It was like a dream. The nanites had fully taken over her body, repairing the terrible injuries inflicted upon her when they had left Lantea, but her mind had remained intact, for the most part, making her more human it seemed. She was a construction of replicator nanites and humanity, a unique being indeed.
"Yes Ma'am," John Sheppard replied, smiling, Mackay sniffed, Ronon did what he always did, a resigned "yeah" and Teyla gave her a reassuring nod, "I believe we are" she replied, in the definite, pushing herself into the seat and struggling with the belt around her. Somewhere in the back of her mind Teyla had memories of another ship, a "Jumper" and she was quite certain that did not have such difficult seat belts! With one fluid movement the cruiser began easing its way through the wreckage and rubble that had been the Replicator's home world toward Lantea the new home of the city of the Ancients. Elizabeth knew they had named their new home Lantea, for now at least. How long it would be called that was irrelevant, she knew its location and that was what mattered right now.
Ronon found himself in the gym, funny really, whenever anything bothered him he would come here and beat the crap out of anyone who was foolish enough to volunteer a bout with him. At this moment he was staring down the end of his bantos rods at a marine sergeant, whose name he didn't even know, but who had answered his challenge. Ronon was an expert, a trained fighter, with only Teyla anywhere near his standard. He smirked remembering the time he had tried to teach Rodney Mackay the fine art of bantos fighting, laying Atlantis' chief of science on his back several times before being rescued by Elizabeth and Sheppard. Elizabeth, there she was again, haunting his thoughts! He shook his head to clear it and the fight with the marine began!
As the bout progressed it occurred to everyone who knew him that it was just possible Ronan was letting the rods strike him, many more times than was usual. The gathered crowd, mostly marines, were cheering their man on, and each time a blow struck him, Ronon felt it as keenly as the pain in his heart. In some ways it lessened the ache, but in the end he had a reputation to uphold and soon began to get the upper hand. Eventually, the marine was lead away by his comrades, nursing a particularly nasty cut to his forehead and Ronon wiped away blood from his nose with the back of his hand.
With that particular bout over, he looked about him, challenging other "volunteers", but no one came forward, some even going so far as to raise their hands in surrender and back away. He smirked, he was still unbeaten, and carefully replaced the bantos rods in their position against the wall, before turning, hearing a sound behind him. Teyla Emmargen stood in the doorway, "I see I am too late" she said, "you are giving up already" she was teasing him, and he knew it. Looking at her, with a wicked grin on his face he replied, "Never!" leaning to his left he picked up the sticks, as she rose to his challenge and, like wise, claimed hers. Teyla was the one person who understood how he felt.
An hour later, both blooded and laughing they parted company to wash the sweat and blood from their bodies before meeting with the rest of their team. Lt Colonel John Sheppard had called a briefing and they were to meet in Colonel Carter's office along with Dr Rodney McKay. Colonel Carter's office. How Ronon wished that the new leader of the Atlantis expedition had not taken Elizabeth's office, had made her self at home in another room, not the one belonging to the woman he had loved, but had never told.
Away in his quarters, the shower running over him, his mind wandered again, thinking about her. In it all he was getting angry, she was consuming his thoughts, she was practically all he thought about, unsummoned she would be there in the recesses of his mind, smiling, the light shining from her eyes, the way she had said "okay" after their first "talk"….and countless other ways in which her memory tormented him. He had to let her go, she was dead, gone and nothing and no one could bring her back. After towelling himself dry and donning clean clothes he set off to an office full of memories.
Elizabeth smiled to herself, lost in thoughts of another time and another life. She no longer sat in the pilot's seat, having relinquished that position to John, and was able to think for a while. She wished with all her heart that she could see "her" Ronon one more time. She knew he would be stunned at the sight of her, a big man, battling with his emotions, and yet how she wished she could see him. She tried to refocus, to think about the mission. Now that the Asuran Replicators were gone the Wraith were turning back to their human feeding grounds, swooping down on defenceless villages and towns through out the galaxy and leaving death and destruction in their wake. Because of her unique heritage, she remembered the horror of watching the starving wraith feed on John Sheppard while his Genii guards looked on, seeing his life drain in front of her, remembering the sharp intake of breath and the sound of Ronon slamming his fist on the consul. It was a strange feeling knowing that she and her team mates could not be killed by the wraith, for although they were flesh and blood, like their Atlantis counterparts, the millions of nanites that lived within them made them unpalatable. She didn't know how the Atlanteans would react to them. She could imagine Sheppard looking at his counterpart in disbelieve, Teyla, she felt, would be more compassionate toward her double, Rodney would probably fall in love with himself, and Ronon, what would he do? Eyeball him probably, and RepliRonon would do the same…hm, interesting, she thought.
"Ok, kids, we're almost there," RepliSheppard announced, rousing Elizabeth to go forward and gaze at the view screen. There, a small dot on the horizon, Atlantis shimmered on the ocean, a crystal jewel in an ocean of sublime beauty. Elizabeth was not familiar with this ocean, she remembered Atlantica, the ocean and the lush mainland, but here she had heard, the mainland was not safe, a giant snake-like creature being the main inhabitant and who knew what dangers lurked beneath those gently lapping wavelets.
"Have they detected us?" She asked, moving into the shotgun seat, recently vacated by Rodney. "Yeah, probably" John replied, "we'll soon find out huh?"
"Is that when we get shot out of the sky or after?" McKay whined, his eyes moving rapidly between Elizabeth and Sheppard.
"Well, I guess that's something we'll have to find out," John replied, as the craft moved closer to the city. Unlike the Atlantian ships their craft was not built with a cloaking device and so it was a pretty sure-fire certainty that they had been detected.
"I think its time to head off" Elizabeth said, quietly, "find a planet and dial in, that might be easier for all round".
"The Alpha site" Sheppard replied, giving the command to the ship which immediately veered away from the city of the Ancients on a new heading.
Ronon found himself in her office with the new leader at her desk…he sighed,
shrugged and generally fidgeted around while Colonel Samantha Carter spoke to his team. Sheppard was nodding in agreement and answering in his usually almost off hand way, but Ronon wasn't really listening, he was thinking of her still and it was, quite frankly, getting on his nerves big time now!
"Ronon" Colonel Carter's voice broke into his reverie, "Am I boring you?"
He looked up to see four pairs of eyes glued to his face, he shrugged," Guess so!" he replied, much to the shock of the others. Colonel Carter, too was slightly phased, replying, "Well, you can always leave, if that's what you want".
"Ok" he replied, standing to his feet.
"Whoa, now hold on Chewie, what's the problem here?" Sheppard asked, "Sit down buddy"
"She said I could leave if I want to, I want to, ok"
"No, its not ok, Colonel, have we done here I think I need to speak to my team" Turning to Carter who with a curt nod of her head, dismissed them from her presence.
Ronon was already halfway down the corridor by the time Sheppard caught up, he moved passed him and stood in front, forcing Ronon to stop or walk straight over him. "Ok, so what's going on here?" He asked, "you got something on your mind".
Ronon, glared at him, not answering. "Come with me" Sheppard said, feeling that maybe a less populated part of the city might make the big guy talk more freely,
"Is that an order, Sheppard?" he asked, and John replied, "No, but if it needs to be, then it is ok"
"Ok" Ronon said.
Sheppard turned on his heel and walked toward the transporter room leading to the East Pier. Ronon followed, but said nothing, his mind racing. Sheppard would not believe him if he told him, it wouldn't be what he wanted to hear, but he followed him anyway, desperate deep inside to talk to the one other person who might understand. John had loved Elizabeth too, in a different way to him, granted, but he had loved her and he just might understand.
The transporter opened onto the East Pier, and they walked out into the Atlantean sunshine. Sheppard made for the railings and leaned, looking out over the ocean, Ronon did the same, and realised he was back where his day had started!
There was silence for awhile, Sheppard mulling things over in his head, thinking and Ronon just stood looking down into the water below and seeing her face in every wave!
Eventually Sheppard spoke, "You miss her too don't you," A statement, not a question.
Ronon shuffled his feet, and not taking his eyes from the water below replied, in a voice so soft, John hardly heard him, "Yes, I do".
"Its ok, ya know" John said softly, "She was an important part of life here, its natural that we would miss her."
"She was life here Sheppard," he replied, "now…." His words petered out, silence filling the gulf that was left by those few words. Sheppard looked at the big man, he hoped that the shock he felt didn't show on his face, and he looked away again quickly, returning his gaze to the sea.
"I didn't know you felt about her, you know, that way," He said softly, "I'm sorry".
Ronon didn't answer for a moment, it was as though he was weighing his words carefully, and yes he probably was. Ronon Dex was known as a man of few words.
After awhile he replied, "Neither did I, and I'm sorry too."
"Come on" John said, slapping him on the back, "I'm gonna kick your ass!"
Ronon grinned, he couldn't help himself, "Oh yeah?" he replied, slapping him back and making Sheppard silently yelp, replying "Yeah!"
Lt Michaels could not believe his eyes. "Doctor Weir?" He asked incredulously, his eyes taking in the slight figure standing in front of him.
"Lieutenant," She replied, a smile on her face, "please, dial the gate, I need to talk to Colonel Sheppard."
"Yes ma'am," he replied, dutifully approaching the DHD and commencing the dialling sequence for the city of the Ancestors. Elizabeth was aware of the glances and murmurs aimed in her direction. She didn't blame them, as far as they knew she was dead, or at least missing, yet here she was back among them. Michaels admitted to himself that he couldn't wait to see the Colonel's face.
"Colonel Sheppard," He said as the gate connected, "there's someone here who wants to talk to you".
Yep, he was right, Sheppard's face went pale when he saw the Doctor, who had stepped into view on the screen, it was Doctor McKay who exclaimed "Elizabeth!" his eyes wide with disbelief.
"Hello Rodney," she said calmly, "John,"
"Elizabeth" Sheppard replied, feeling all kinds of sick at one go. Behind him, he heard the sharp intake of breath that was Ronon Dex, but kept his eyes firmly to the front.
"We thought you were – er, you know," he added, stupidly…she would have known that, he didn't need to say it.
In confirmation, she replied, "I know, and I am, and yet I'm not, its kind of complicated"
"Ok," John replied, just before Rodney pushed in with, "Elizabeth, where the hell have you been? Do you know what's been happening around here?"
"Whoa Rodney, slow down," Sheppard intervened, gesturing with his head toward Elizabeth, who still stood serenely alongside the young Lieutenant. "Give her a chance".
"May I return to Atlantis?" she asked tentatively, knowing that so far she had not mentioned the rest of her team.
Sheppard hesitated for a moment, before replying, "We'll come to you, ok?"
"Ok," she answered, not allowing the disappointment to show on her face, then adding, "In fact that's a good idea, there's some one I would like you to meet."
"Ok" John said again, "give us and hour to gear up"
"Fine," Elizabeth replied, "we'll be waiting."
The gate shut off and John and Rodney looked at each other in bewilderment. Behind them Ronon was struggling with his emotions in a way he had never done before, he had seen her, but if she had seen him, she didn't acknowledge him. He didn't know what he felt right then, so when Sheppard passed him, punched him on the arm and said "let's go buddy," he felt strangely relieved.
"You're doing what?" Colonel Samantha Carter asked, incredulously. "How do you know it's really her?"
"Its her" John responded, "I know it, Rodney knows it, its her Colonel, we have to go."
"How do you know its not some clever replicator ambush?" she asked again, "you don't know who else might be waiting for you there!"
"No, we don't", he answered, "but we know she is, and we have to go. Besides the Replicators are dead."
"Why are you arguing with her?" Ronon had entered the room, impatient to be going.
"Keep out of it Ronon", Sheppard warned, "Everything is under control, we're going, right?" this last question aimed at the Colonel, who returned his gaze with warning in her eyes, but who eventually sighed, resignedly.
"Alright," She replied, "I understand you want to see her, just be careful and know that things aren't always what they seem"
A short while later, the team assembled and the gate was dialled. Teyla stood behind John and Rodney with Ronon, her face serene, a slight smile on her lips, if the report was true, she was looking forward to seeing Elizabeth again and she could tell the others felt the same. Except for Ronon, she wasn't sure what he was feeling.
Specialist Ronon Dex was struggling in a way he could not ever remember struggling before. Losing Melina, running from the wraith, nothing had ever made him feel this way, this vulnerable. Supposing it was some Replicator trick and it wasn't really her? He looked down at Teyla, standing there with that small grin on her face and wanted to scream. Instead, he headed off through the gate along with the others and awaited whatever fate he would find there.
Lieutenant Michaels was waiting for them as they stepped out of the event horizon. He saluted Sheppard and said briskly, "This way."
They followed him with Ronon on their six, hanging back more than was necessary, yet feeling the need to stay where he was, his eyes moving from side to side, watching their flank. Why did he feel so uneasy? Suddenly he stopped, his eyes unable to take in the scene in front of him as he came face to face with – himself!
"What the hell!" Sheppard exclaimed as he too found himself looking at himself, and then suddenly she was there, smiling nervously at them. "John," she said, "Rodney, Teyla," she hesitated, took a breath and continued, "Ronon, let me explain."
"Yeah, would be good". John replied. Slowly, she began the story, explaining what happened, how "her" team came about and all the while Ronon stood toe to toe with his counterpart, who snarled at him, but didn't back down.
A few moments of awkward silence passed before Sheppard finally said, "So you're wanting to come back to Atlantis with us?" Rodney, who had been listening intently for a change couldn't keep quiet any longer and exclaimed, "At last, someone my equal to work with," at which RepliMcKay retorted, "Yes, finally, you have know idea how long I have waited for this!"
"Er, I think I do, Rodney replied, grinning from ear to ear.
"Oh hey, yeah that's right you're me, so you'd know that!" RepliMcKay responded, grinning back.
Sheppard looked at his counterpart and turning his attention back to Weir said quietly, "It won't work Elizabeth, there can't be two of us, things would get a little confused dontcha think, and besides how do we know we can trust you?"
"I agree, it could be rather confusing," Weir replied, "but just think how useful my team can be against the wraith, in a way you can't, and John," she paused for a second, "do you trust yourselves?"
Sheppard drew a deep breath, attempting to give himself time to think. He did trust himself, mostly anyway, and he knew his team was entirely trustworthy, but these were Replicators!
"John?" she asked, waiting for his answer.
"Well I guess so, at least I trust these guys," he gestured toward his team, "But" – he shrugged his shoulders, "you're Replicators!"
"Not in the same way as Oberoth," Elizabeth replied, her voice filled with conviction. "We were created differently, we have the same minds, the same thoughts, the same emotions as you have, and we have something the Replicators could not possess, we have souls. This is the reason we were created, for them to study us. There were some Replicators, Like Niam, who worked on ascension. We have thought about this long and hard since the destruction of the Replicator home world, and we want to help, we are, after all, by all intents and purposes, you."
Ronon turned his attention to her now for the first time. He was already tired of eyeballing himself, and he wanted to look at this woman who looked and sounded exactly like her.
"So what do you wanna do?" He asked, knowing it wasn't really his place to ask, but what the hell, Sheppard could kick his ass later!
She turned and looked up at him. Was he taller than she remembered? His hair thicker, his body more lithe? No, he was exactly as Elizabeth Weir remembered him, and once again she found her breath gone, her heart beating fast. Pulling herself together she replied, "We are proposing a back up team"
"Ok, like the A team and the B team?" Sheppard asked, regretting it when he saw his double scowl angrily and the others open their mouths to protest.
"Yes, and no" Elizabeth said quickly, tearing her eyes away from Ronon "I know that Colonel Carter is in command of Atlantis now, I don't expect that privilege again, after all, I could be a security threat right?"
"I wouldn't think of you like that." He hesitated.
"John maybe you wouldn't, but the IOA might have something to say about it, no, what we are proposing is to be your eyes and ears out there where the wraith are. They can't hurt us, and we're distasteful to them, we would be quite safe, and we could gather valuable intel."
"They can kill you!" Rodney said, looking worriedly at RepliMcKay, who grinned knowingly back.
"Actually, "he replied, "no they can't"
"What?"
"They shoot us, our little on board buddies heal us, they kill us, they bring us back to life, and God help them if the wraith try to feed on us. We are virtually indestructible, and certainly are where the wraith are concerned. We are the perfect weapon, the perfect spies!"
"Yep" Sheppard said quietly to McKay, "He's you alright!."
Rodney, gazing in rapt attention at RepliMaKay, barely replied, "Oh my, isn't it wonderful!"
"Whatever!" John said impatiently, turning his gaze back to Elizabeth. "Ok," he continued, "We'll take this back to Colonel Carter and see what she has to say"
Ronon had turned away from his double who had taken his place along RepliTeyla, and allowed himself to look fully at Elizabeth. This woman looked like her, in every sense, and yet she was a replicator? He didn't quite understand, although, even to him there was no mistaking the way she was looking at him now, whilst the others were talking amongst themselves. He held his breath as she made her way toward him, as far as he was concerned, she was Elizabeth Weir.
"What the hell!" Elizabeth thought as she gathered herself together, her eyes fixed on Ronon, it had seemed so long since she had seen him. He held her gaze, something RepliRonon never did, and she felt herself moving toward him. His face was open, welcoming almost, and as she reached him, she looked up and smiled.
Ronon's heart broke! He couldn't take his eyes off her, conscious now of the others looking on, the bewildered looks on the faces of "her" team, and the not so surprised look on the faces of Sheppard and Teyla, the Rodneys were too busy talking to each other!
"Ronon" she said softly, reaching out to gently touch his arm, "I've missed you."
He looked down at her small hand resting on his arm and quietly he replied, I've missed you too, I thought you were dead"
"Not dead not really, Ronon, just missing," she answered, "missing Atlantis, missing the team, and most of all, missing you."
"He didn't do it for you?" he asked, inclining his head toward his counterpart, who was scowling at the whole scene, some yards away.
"He's not you," She replied, "he's, shall we say, you a year ago."
"Ok" he said, a small smile playing on his lips now. He understood.
Later, after the briefing back in Atlantis, Ronon again, stood leaning over the railing on the East Pier, gazing down at the ocean below. His day had now come full circle, and he was back to a place of peace. As expected Colonel Carter would not allow the "B" team, including Elizabeth, to come to the city, but she would take their proposal under advisement and report the situation to the SGC. It didn't matter, he would see her again, she had told him as much and he believed her. He had always believed her, always trusted her and now, yes now, without doubt, he loved her and would see her again. He sighed her name and echoing back across the waves he heard the reply, "Ronon".
As she settled down that night in her new temporary quarters on the Alpha site, in her imagination, Elizabeth heard a voice whispering softly on the breeze, "Elizabeth". Smiling in the darkness, she whispered in reply "Ronon" and as she began to drift off to sleep she knew that, after several months of wondering if it was true, Replicators can sleep and Replicators can fall in love. This was just the beginning of a whole new life and one that she also knew, in time, would lead her back to Atlantis, her beloved city of the Ancients and to the man she loved.
The end?