Forget about Forgiving
(set after Horsemen episodes, Joe comes back to Seacouver leaving Mac and Methos in Paris)
Gregor waited impatiently, hitching up and then pulling down the sleeves of the cream colored sweater he was wearing over a pair of soft grey trousers. He didn't know what he was doing, waiting in front of MacLeod's dojo. He felt raw; he had ever since he had gone to Sean Burns, psychologist to immortals. All of his emotional defenses had been scratched away, it seemed. He had left after a year, hearing of Burns death at MacLeod's hand by a friend he had met while in Burn's care. So much had happened, to him, to…everyone. Why was he here again? To apologize? To apologize for almost sending a frightened kid into immortality a few months before he ended up dead anyway? Gregor sighed and scrubbed his freshly shaven face with his hands. Richie had been so young. That was what had drawn Gregor in the first place. Richie had courage and the kind of reckless abandon that all teenagers enjoy mingled with such tender vulnerability. The fact that the kid had recognized the danger Gregor had put him in had been surprising. The insight spoke of a far more intimate knowledge of risk than Gregor had wanted to contemplate.
No Gregor had no idea what he was doing there he just knew that it was something he had to do. And the reason had nothing to do with not wanting to find himself at the business end of the kid's sword. The kid had been nice to him, listened to him even when he was being such a shit. Trusted him. He wanted to be worthy of that trust. He needed Richie to understand, to forgive him.
He felt the buzz and tensed. Now was the proverbial moment of truth, he wouldn't be surprised if the kid tried to kill him before he managed to get a word out. Their eyes met across the parking lot, piercing blue eyes stared at him. The eyes were hard, the eyes of a man now, a man who had already seen too much. The eyes of a killer. Gregor's gaze took in the rest of the young immortal's figure, noticing Richie had changed in many ways. He had lost all of his baby fat, but not his cherubic face. He was no longer skinny and gawky, now he looked well muscled, muscles that could be seen shifting under his white t-shirt. He had cut his hair as well, gone were the beautiful curls Gregor remembered. His haircut was severe as was his demeanor. He strode over to the building with a surety of purpose that Gregor had not thought possible of the flighty youth he had known.
As he came closer, Gregor swallowed and looked down to stifle his embarrassment. When he looked up he felt blinded by the smile on Richie's face. In that moment everything fell away and there was only the sweet, candid, exuberant youth and Gregor could only smile back. That was why he came. Whatever might have happened in the young man's life, he had a purity of spirit like a child's that had not been diminished. Before Gregor had wanted to stifle it, snuff it out like a candle's flame. Now he wanted to bask in its glow and shield it from the winds of circumstance.
"Greg?! What are you doing here?" Richie held a hand out to the older immortal. Gregor stared at it for a long moment before grasping it with his own hand. This was /not/ the reaction he had expected. He didn't know how to respond.
"Oh, I…uh…was just in the neighborhood," Gregor stammered out. Richie moved past him still smiling to open the door for the few customers that had gathered around them. Gregor waited until the men had moved past before trying to speak again. "I was hoping to talk…to you." Dammit! It was coming out all wrong. Richie gave him a surprised look.
"Course. We can talk in the office; just give me a minute to open up." Gregor waited a moment, watching the other immortal move around the dojo, talking to the early morning clients, smiling and laughing. He felt self-conscious as he made his way to the glassed in office, suddenly aware of the weight of his own melancholy. He sat on the couch and waited, trying not to look at the young man he had come to see.
Richie seemed to burst in through the door, a whirlwind of energy. Still smiling, he sat down in the desk chair. "So how are you?"
"Good…better." Gregor wrung his hands. He wanted to shout at the young man, why do you care? But he could see nothing but genuine concern in the blue eyes. "Listen, I wanted to apologize…" He never got the rest of his sentence out.
"Don't sweat it, man," Richie said, sitting back in his chair and waving off the words with a hand. "You were dealing with some shit." Richie made the comment blandly but Gregor felt like he was missing something, like something was going unsaid. Richie continued talking though, "I don't know how long you want to hang around, Mac's in Paris right now."
Was that it, Gregor thought? He thinks I'm really here to see the Highlander and just felt obligated to mend the rift with his student? "I thought I'd stick around for a while, see the sights I missed last time, but Richie, I came here…to talk to you not him." Something indefinable crossed Richie's features but it was gone in the space of a heartbeat. "Maybe we could meet for a drink later?"
Richie shrugged. "Yeah sure." He moved to write something on a scrap of paper he found on the desk. "Here," the redhead said, handing over the paper. "I'll probably be at this place by nine." He laughed, a little forced. "We're there a lot, it's sort of an immortal hang out I guess." Gregor looked at the paper, 'Joe's' the bar was called. He nodded and began to head out the door, feeling like he was on the outside of an inside joke. He glanced back. Richie was bent over the desk, pen in hand.
When he got to the bar that evening, Gregor was feeling more like himself, more comfortable in his own skin. He was introduced to Joe, whom he quickly decided he liked. He seemed like a fun, easy-going guy. And Gregor didn't miss the paternal look in his eye when he looked at Richie. For Gregor's part, he entertained both men with stories of MacLeod that the Highlander would probably prefer they not know. He couldn't help noticing that the kid seemed to be drinking a lot; Joe didn't seem to miss it either. And the more Richie drank the more withdrawn he seemed, like it was too much of an effort to keep up the pretense any more.
Finally Gregor thought they had all had enough. He offered the kid a ride, saying that the bike would fit in the back of his rented SUV. Richie just nodded a move of complacency that Gregor had not expected. Joe gave him a hard appraising look as the two immortals left.
Richie didn't say anything on the drive either except for directions to his apartment, but then he invited Gregor in. The older immortal stepped inside the apartment warily, hearing Richie lock the door behind them. He turned, intending to speak, to say that maybe he should go when Richie kissed him. It was everything that he could have hoped for. Richie's soft full lips caressing his own, Gregor felt like his heart had gone missing from his chest cavity, like he was incredibly light. He felt that he was hot on the outside and cold on the inside, that time itself stood still. With a momentous effort he pushed the other man away.
"Rich, you've had a lot to drink." A warm, strong hand glided along the side of his neck to grip the back of his head. Gregor looked into fierce eyes that had turned a dark azure in passion.
"I know what I'm doing… Please." With that word Gregor was undone and then Richie's lips were on him again and those lips required his complete capitulation and Gregor was only too happy to oblige. He felt Richie's passion quicken him, seeping into those places in his heart that he had thought long dead. The younger immortal's other hand came up to grip Gregor's hip and lead him backwards through the small kitchen to the bedroom. Once there Richie stripped off Gregor's sweater, his eyes roaming over the pale skin lit only minimally by streetlight coming in through the window. The young man stripped off his own t-shirt as he pushed his partner to sit on the bed and kneeled between his legs. He removed the loafers that Gregor wore and the black trouser socks, and then reached for the button on Gregor's pants. Gregor leaned back on his elbows to accommodate the younger man's efforts and lifted his hips for the garment to be removed. Richie stood, pushing Gregor back into the middle of the bed with a hand in the center of his chest. Richie removed his own jeans and briefs before following.
The older immortal felt like he was being stalked as Richie crawled closer. His dark head rolled back as the younger moved to suck on his pulse point. He felt hands, light at first then becoming bolder as they trailed from his shoulders to his chest, the thumbs flicking at his nipples. Gregor moaned. Richie seemed to like the sound as he redoubled his efforts. Then Richie pulled away.
"Turn over," Richie's voice was low and husky, thick with desire. The words plus the voice hardening Gregor's cock more than he would have thought possible. He felt balanced on a razor's edge as he complied getting on his hands and knees. Gregor heard a drawer being opened. Wow this kid's just full of surprises he thought. Then he could feel the heat of Richie's body as he leaned over the older man right before he felt the cool slickness of lubricated fingers lightly touching his entrance. Then a finger pressed fully inside. Gregor gasped and trembled at the feel of being entered, dropping his head. God it had been so long since he had wanted to be joined like this with another person. When the finger was removed he couldn't help crying out at its loss even as he knew he wouldn't be empty for long.
When two fingers pressed in and began stretching, Gregor bucked against them desperately, moaning loudly. Richie got the hint and replaced the fingers with the blunt head of his cock. Gregor stopped breathing, the anticipation of the act washing over him in delicious waves, then the glorious sensation of Richie's cock pressing in, of stretching and friction and pressure. When he was fully inside, Richie paused. Gregor could feel Richie all around him as they panted almost in rhythm. The younger immortal's lips grazed over the back of his neck, the heat of his breath stirring the short hairs there. Gregor could feel the soft scratch of golden curls against his back and his ass, the slide of sweat as it dripped over one pale shoulder to land on his own. Richie's right arm crossed Gregor's smooth chest to grip his left shoulder tight.
Then Richie began to move, but he didn't pull out, not yet. He just rocked them forward, pressing in deeper and then releasing. "Oh god yeah," Richie breathed the words before pressing a moist kiss to Gregor's neck, letting his nose drag across the skin as well. He pulled out, only a fraction before thrusting in forcefully. He did it over and over again until Gregor wanted to scream for the slowness of it, the constant pressure on his prostate blurring the line between pain and pleasure.
He let himself fall onto his elbows, one hand reaching for his own engorged cock. Richie withdrew his arm, placing both hands on Gregor's hips, he increased both the speed and force of his thrusts. Gregor cried out and jerked frantically as he came, spilling his useless seed over the white cotton sheets. Richie continued thrusting for another minute, his cock gliding over his partner's sensitive prostate sending aftershocks of pleasure through Gregor's shuddering body. Then he buried himself in his partner one last time, before climaxing himself with a low deep groan.
Richie fell forward, collapsing on Gregor's back as Gregor attempted to straighten his legs underneath them before they cramped. Quickly Richie rolled off onto his back. They both lay there, panting and gasping. Gregor looked up in dread as Richie pushed himself out of the bed. His anxiety only mildly decreasing as Richie came back in with a damp cloth. He watched with wary eyes as the young man cleaned the semen from Gregor's belly and hand and the lube from his ass. He didn't know what to do. Should he get dressed and go? Was this a one night stand? He couldn't help berating himself as a fool ruled by his cock either. But Richie just returned from putting the cloth back in the bathroom and climbed into bed. He pressed a slow, sensual kiss to Gregor's lips before pulling the sheets over both of them.
Ok, Richie was obviously expecting him to stay. Richie was however not apparently expecting any cuddling. Richie had situated himself close to his lover, but not touching and his face was turned away. Gregor turned on his side to face the redhead. He seemed to be asleep already. Richie's skin was gorgeous even in the phosphorescent glare of the streetlight. He desperately wanted to reach out and touch it, to wrap himself around Richie's beautiful body and bury his face in the younger man's neck. It was with a concentrated effort that he turned on his other side and tried to go to sleep.
When Gregor woke he was alone, but he could still sense Richie. He can't run away anyway you old fool, Gregor told himself. He lives here. The older immortal heard a clanking coming from the kitchen. He dressed himself in his clothes from yesterday and went to the bathroom before heading to the kitchen himself. Richie was munching on a piece of toast as he spooned eggs onto a plate and then grabbed another piece of toast as it popped up from the toaster. This he also placed on the plate which he then placed on the counter.
"Morning," the redhead said cheerily. Gregor was certain Richie could see how cautious he was, but the younger man was graciously ignoring it. He tried to manage a smile. Richie barely stopped moving long enough to notice. "Look, I've gotta be at work" he paused to toss Gregor a set of keys. "Lock up will you. I'll be at Joe's later if you want to stop by." On his way out the door, he pressed a chaste kiss against Gregor's lips which caused Gregor to quiver anyway.
Gregor let his head hit the counter as soon as he heard the door shut. Godammit! Wasn't he supposed to be the older and wiser one? Why did he feel so out of his depth? Was the kid really in control of this whole thing? He reviewed the events of last night and this morning and felt like he was missing something again. Richie did seem a little tightly strung, even for him. Gregor felt like Richie was keeping him at arms length. Maybe the kid was just as nervous as he was who knew how experienced he was with male partners. Then the reason for Gregor's whole visit came back to him and he groaned. What the hell was he doing? Last time he had tried to kill Richie and now he was sleeping with him. He continued to berate himself, even as he commended the kid on his ability to cook eggs.
Gregor met the kid at Joe's as planned. He couldn't help himself. Richie seemed fine, grinning at him but not touching him or mentioning the previous night. He also didn't drink as much. When the two men left however, he invited Gregor to his place again. It became sort of a habit; they did the same thing the rest of the week. The feeling of being kept emotionally distant intensified however. They never talked about it, never cuddled, and Richie was always on top. But this morning it was Sunday and Gregor knew for a fact that the dojo was closed all day.
Gregor woke up alone as usual, hearing Richie making breakfast as usual. He wandered into the kitchen, thinking to invite the kid to go do something with him; but Richie beat him to it.
"Hey," Richie grinned, that sheepish yet self-satisfied grin that he often wore in the mornings. "I was thinking today we'd go see those sights that you were interested in." Richie must have seen the stunned look on Gregor's face because he suddenly stammered and looked away. "I mean…I thought, you would…" Richie's body seemed to be literally drawing in on itself.
Gregor stopped him, leaning across the kitchen island to lay a hand on the kid's arm. "I'd love for you to be my tour guide. Can we stop by my hotel for me to get a change of clothes first?" Richie nodded awkwardly, his face still seeming pained as if he hadn't recovered from his earlier feelings of rejection. He quickly retreated to the bedroom, leaving Gregor to his breakfast and his thoughts.
When Richie returned to the kitchen, he was smiling and hurrying the other man, the picture of his normal rambunctious self. Gregor now felt like it was just a mask though. At his hotel he changed quickly. When he grabbed his camera, something flashed across Richie's features. Was it fear? Gregor could have kicked himself. Of course the camera would remind him of the photography show that had brought him to Seacouver three years ago. But Richie covered it again, saying how he'd love it if Gregor took pictures of some of Tessa's work in the park.
It was a great day all in all really. The two immortals talked easily, but Richie kept the conversation purposely away from the events of their last meeting and away from recent events in the young man's life. He instead asked Greg about 'therapy' and photography. Gregor wanted to sigh. With all the time he had spent in therapy, he would have thought he'd learned something to break through the wall Richie had around his emotions. Oh the kid was talkative, but not about anything important it seemed.
Gregor took the required pictures at Tessa's sculpture, taking the opportunity to show Richie some things about cameras and photography. The kid was so beautiful, with the sunlight warming his skin and glinting like gold off of his hair. Gregor couldn't help reaching out a hand to stroke Richie's cheek. The younger immortal seemed surprised and abashed, like he didn't quite know how to respond to the gentle contact. He smiled though, a small smile as if he hadn't meant to let it escape. Gregor quickly went back to discussing the light and what not but he couldn't help wondering what would have made the kid so averse to affection. It was obvious that Richie wasn't having a problem being with him, in bed or out of it. He could just want to be friends that fucked. Gregor frowned at that. No he didn't think that was it. Richie seemed to be waiting, expecting something, bracing for it even.
When it started to get dark, they took a short cut through some alleyways to get back to the car. As they felt the buzz of another immortal, Gregor cursed Fate, that fickle bitch. Not now, not here, he thought desperately. While Gregor had stood there berating the gods, the universe, and himself, Richie had already pulled out his sword. Gregor was shocked out of his rambling thoughts by Richie's hand on his chest, pushing the older immortal behind the redhead. With a final shove on Gregor's chest, Richie walked forward to meet the unknown opponent.
They both watched as a man much taller than both of them stepped around a dumpster and into their line of vision. Gregor recognized him immediately. He had run into the man in Prague a year earlier in a crowded market. He had declined the offer to adjourn to someplace quieter. Gregor was not a coward and he was good with a sword thanks to MacLeod, but neither did he feel the need to risk his head in every fight that came his way. But Richie was filled with the impetuousness of youth, always going out to meet challenges head-on. Gregor wondered idly in those moments whether Richie would ever be able to out grow those impulses or whether his perpetually nineteen year old hormones would forever inhibit common sense.
Then the unknown immortal called out to them, "Gregor, if you think this baby will be enough to appease me, you were wrong. However, I will enjoy taking such a pretty head."
Before Gregor even had a chance to respond, cold hard blue eyes were turned on him. They bored into him with the force of the anger in them, anger but not surprise. "You set me up." The words were a statement said in a low resigned voice that was tinged with despair. And then the young man engaged the fight and there was nothing for Gregor to do but watch.
It was a long hard fight for Richie whose quick feet saved him from a killing blow more than once. After only a few minutes, Richie was so covered in cuts that Gregor thought the young man was still standing only through force of will. In the end that was what won the battle for him however. His opponent was cocky, sure of his win and of his power over the younger immortal. Richie would have none of it though. The challenger was so certain he had the redhead that he put the full force of his body weight behind what he thought would be a beheading stroke, only to stare in astonishment as Richie leapt away yet again and proceeded to take off the bigger man's head.
As soon as the quickening died away, Gregor rushed forward to help the young man off his knees. Before his hand made contact however, Richie shot off his knees and away from him, leaning against a nearby wall for support. Gregor followed, not willing to let the kid get away, not after those long minutes of fearing that he was going to die.
"Richie, I…"
"Don't touch me. I should have known, I /did/ know, I was waiting for it." Richie's face showed his inner turmoil as he moved restlessly, desperately against the brick wall.
"Waiting for what, Rich?" Gregor asked in a soft voice.
"For you to turn on me…like everyone else." Richie seemed to take strength from his words as he pushed off the wall and began to walk.
Gregor kept up with him but gave the other man a foot of space. "Rich, last time I was here…I'm sorry." He didn't know what to say, how to explain his behavior.
Richie whirled around in a sudden rage. "Sorry! Sorry for what?! Acting like a person, like everyone does?" Then in a small voice, head bowed, "It's nothing less than what I deserve."
Gregor stared in stunned silence. He wanted to draw the despondent youth into an embrace, but he knew the effort would not be appreciated. Gregor understood suddenly exactly what he had been catching glimpses of over the past week. No wonder the boy had seemed to forgive him so easily, he probably forgives everybody. He's learnt not to expect anything more than betrayal. For him the world does not work under the principles of cause and effect because no matter what he does or how good he tries to be the punishment always comes. He approached the young man carefully as the youth backed into another wall. "Richie, what I did to you, how I treated you…it was wrong. You didn't deserve it, you didn't do anything wrong. It was all my fault; I never should have hurt you."
Richie sank, sliding down the wall to sit on the cement. "But you did, even Mac…Tessa was the only one." The boy was on the edge of tears at the woman's name and covered his eyes briefly with a shaking hand.
"Richie, I was not in league with that oaf." Gregor waited until Richie nodded in agreement or acquiescence, he couldn't tell. "I am going to stick around, for as long as it takes to prove to you that I'm not going to turn on you that you don't deserve anything but love and affection." The youth glared at him but he ignored it, instead reaching out a hand to help the man up. Richie refused it, standing up himself.
The two immortals began to finish the walk back to the car. Gregor couldn't help asking one more question though. "Richie, why did you try to protect me in the first place?"
The redhead shrugged. "I didn't know how good you were or how much you had been practicing recently. I didn't know if you would have the will to win." Gregor couldn't keep the small smile from appearing on his own face or the tears that suddenly filled his eyes. That Richie would want to protect him, after what he had done…it was too much.
Richie was resentfully quiet for the drive back. He was trying to withdraw both from Gregor and from his earlier outburst. He hopped out of the car practically before Gregor had begun to slow down much less stop, leaving the older man to rush in after him. Gregor found him in the bathroom, shucking his clothes for a shower.
Gregor hesitantly asked, "You want some help?" He tried to inject just the right amount of lightness into the question so that Richie might take it as just an offer to burn off some tension. It didn't work as the young man was definitely struggling for an answer, his slender fingers resting on the tab of his jeans.
"Fine," he finally muttered. Gregor proceeded to undress. He could feel the younger man's eyes darting at his increasingly naked form. He felt himself getting aroused by it. Gregor didn't feel like he was exactly using his body against his perpetually nineteen year old partner, but if it gave him an opening, he wasn't above taking it.
Richie stepped into the shower facing the spray, turning his back on his companion. Gregor soaped up the washcloth and began washing the kid's pale muscular back. He felt Richie stiffen momentarily at the contact. Gregor attempted to keep his touches nonsexual. Richie stiffened again at the washcloth skimming over his bare ass. Gregor turned the kid around. Richie reached for him, pulling him into a wet kiss. Gregor gently disengaged himself and continued washing. He swept the washcloth over the rounded pectorals and flat abdominals which fluttered under the pressure and then down the strong arms, washing even each finger. Gregor knew that the young man was already aroused so he washed the other man's genitals quickly but thoroughly. When he squatted down to wash Richie's legs and feet though he sensed the surprise, Richie obviously didn't have much experience at being taken care of.
Gregor stood up to face the young man. Richie shuddered when Gregor brought a finger up to lightly stroke a silky cheek. "What do you want Richie?" Strikingly blue eyes lifted, an array of emotions warring in them. The last one, Gregor could identify as hope.
"You," Richie said as if the word itself were a momentous effort, as if merely speaking his desire out loud would cause the object of it to disappear.
When they finally stepped out Richie reached for a towel but Gregor took it from him gently and toweled them both off. He led the younger immortal into the bedroom, kissing him gently as he pressed Richie's body into the mattress with his own. Then he settled onto the man's left side, idly stroking patterns through the burnished copper curls of Richie's chest. "Richie, have you ever…?"
"No," Richie said in a whisper. Gregor thought that the answer was a little quick and there were hints of other emotions in the other immortal's voice, emotions like shame. Richie's next words stunned him into forgetting those thoughts though. "Greg, you're the first man I've…been with." Again Gregor had the vague feeling that something was being left out, but that line of thinking was buried under the stampeding feeling of remorse. That had been Richie's first time? If he had known, Gregor thought, he would have…what? Gone slower? Been gentler? Had he forgotten that he hadn't been in control of anything?
Gregor kissed Richie gently, his hands softly curling around the younger man's face. Richie responded, opening his mouth and bring up his own hands to stroke Gregor's body. Then he pulled back. Gregor saw longing written on those perfect features. Longing for what he wondered. Longing for Gregor, longing to be cared for, cared about, longing to put down his protective shields? Richie spoke and to Gregor the words seemed to cost the young man dearly, "Teach me?" And Gregor knew what he was asking and knew that he was afraid of it and ashamed of being afraid.
The two men kissed again, not as gentle as before. Gregor slipped his hand in between the young man's thighs, lightly pushing them apart, and stroking first Richie's perineum and then his opening. Richie gasped and jerked. Gregor laid an again gentle kiss on his lips.
"Has anyone ever touched you there before?"
A slight blush crept into the kid's cheeks. "A kinky girlfriend," he said with a small grin. Even as he grinned though, something else flashed through his eyes.
"She hurt you." It was not a question. Gregor felt like he was finally catching onto this game.
"She tried to kill me," Richie corrected, looking away but not bothering to hide the bitterness in his tone. Gregor just stroked the man's face, drawing his attention back with nips to his full lower lip. The older immortal shifted, positioning himself between the younger man's splayed legs, taking time to reach for the lube on the bedside table as well.
He began slowly, passionately kissing Richie. He drew his lips across the young immortal's face to lave an earlobe and then moving downward to suck hard on the sensitive soft spot beneath the ear. He paid particular attention to the darkened nubs of flesh peeking out from the chest hair. He licked them lightly over and over and then drew one into his mouth to suck hard. Richie bucked, undulating his hips in a silent plea even as his chest arched into the Gregor's touch. Moving to the other side, Gregor bit the nipple lightly, and then harder, causing Richie to throw his head back in a loud moan. Moving down still farther, Gregor lapped and nipped at the washboard stomach. Then he sat up on his knees, grabbing a pillow. Richie looked vaguely confused as Gregor lifted up the young man's hips, sliding the pillow beneath them.
Gregor looked into the young man's eyes, letting his own longing show, before bending to take the young man's cock into his mouth. Richie groaned. As he sucked, Gregor teased a slicked finger against the young man's opening, pressing it in slowly. Richie bucked a little, thrusting into Gregor's mouth, definitely enjoying it. Gregor figured that this was probably what his girlfriend had done and that the kid was comfortable with it. Gregor moved lower to lap at the ball sac as he pressed two fingers in. He met with no resistance. On three there was the customary resistance but Richie was still moving eagerly.
Gregor removed his hand and moved up to kiss Richie passionately. He brought Richie's hands up to grip the back of his own knees, holding the younger man open. Exposed. Gregor saw fear in his partner's eyes. "Richie, we don't have to do this."
Gregor had missed the resolve behind the fear, but he saw it now as Richie spoke, "I want to. I don't want to be afraid." Gregor nodded and positioned himself at his partner's entrance. Gregor pressed in. There was definitely resistance. Richie's eyes sparkled with pain but neither the fear nor the resolve diminished. His mouth was open, panting with strained breaths. He was struggling to remain present. He relaxed with conscious effort and Gregor pressed in more. Gregor could see the beginning of pleasure now. He withdrew and slowly thrust all the way in. Richie pulled the older man down into an ardent kiss as Gregor continued thrusting. Richie then wrapped his lean thighs around the other man's waist. Gregor could feel the heels of Richie's feet, pressing into his buttocks. The younger man began forcing Gregor's thrusts to be harder, deeper. One of Richie's hands which had been gripping the older immortal's back started pumping his own cock. Richie's orgasm built from whimpering to a strangled cry causing Gregor's thrusts to become frantic, triggering his climax.
Gregor leaned on his elbows over the young immortal, both breathing harshly in the sudden stillness. Placing a hand on the kid's hip, he withdrew with a 'pop', dropping down on his side. He wanted to watch Richie still. The other man had his eyes closed as he attempted to breathe more normally; his arms and legs had dropped open. Finally he turned to Gregor with grin and withdrew to the bathroom. When Richie came back in and got under the covers, Gregor spooned up behind him. The younger man turned his face up in surprise. Gregor smiled and kissed him, then settled in behind him, pulling the youth to his chest. He imagined that Richie was smiling.
The older immortal lay there in the darkness, his mind moving too fast to sleep despite his body's fatigue. He reveled in the feel of the young man in his arms, keeping a smile on his face. It was almost better than being inside the youth. Richie was such an alpha male, Gregor thought absently. He couldn't even be a passive 'bottom'. In fact Gregor was hard pressed to think if he had ever known a more demanding 'bottom'. He smiled at that. He knew that Richie would still want to be on top most of the time, and that was fine with him, but Gregor was glad that the younger immortal had been willing to expand things. Richie had been beautiful underneath him. Gregor remembered the sight, Richie's head thrown back, neck straining, eyes fluttering closed, lost in his own ecstasy, in the ecstasy that Gregor gave him. He thought of the youth's words, that he didn't want to be afraid. Gregor instinctively tightened his arms around the man in them. He wanted so much to help Richie; but Gregor knew that the young man was strong, that he didn't want 'help'. Gregor would have to content himself with just being there for him.
The next morning, Gregor woke with the young man tightly wrapped around him. Gregor had shifted onto his back and Richie had turned into him, tucking his face into Gregor's neck and throwing his limbs over the older immortal. Gregor felt like chuckling. Their position could be seen as Richie clinging to him for comfort, like a child. But Gregor could also see that Richie was protecting him.
Gregor inclined his head to kiss a freckled forehead. Richie stirred, looking up at him with wary eyes and yet not moving away. Gregor took that as a good sign. They kissed, long and savoring. Richie's eyes glinted with amusement this time as he pulled away. That morning they made breakfast together, Gregor taking several opportunities to touch or kiss the young man as they did.
They repeated this new pattern for the next week. Gregor felt like Richie was smiling more honestly now. They began having sex two or three times a night, occasionally in the morning too. They took showers together, made dinner together, went to a movie, laughed and touched. Gregor began to think about the future, he laughed at himself for that. It had been a long time since he had thought about such things, the future. Now all of a sudden he felt like there was one and he was looking forward to it.
He considered moving to Seacouver, trying to get a job there. He didn't want to scare the kid by moving too quickly but he also couldn't just continue to hang around with nothing to do either. He had begun taking pictures again, a lot of them were still dark but more and more of them seemed to capture his new happiness. That was how he came to be taking pictures of Richie one day after he had returned from the dojo.
Richie was changing, stripping off his button-down shirt and jeans and putting on sweats. Gregor couldn't help himself. The fading light was perfect, almost caressing the half dressed figure before him. Richie didn't notice Gregor taking his picture until he had finished and was moving to leave the room. Gregor immediately noticed the look of horror on his lover's face though. He did not however understand it. Richie doesn't like to have his picture taken? He feels like his privacy was invaded? He's ashamed of his body? Gregor didn't know but he didn't think the reaction had anything to do with the photography show of two years ago.
Richie's horror quickly digressed to anger and shame, possibly some righteous indignation thrown in too. Gregor stared back dumbly as the other immortal strode to the door of the apartment. He caught on as Richie stuffed his feet into the sneakers left beside the door and grabbed his keys.
"Richie, wait…" The door practically slammed in Gregor's face, leaving him alone in the suddenly quiet apartment. He staggered back, feeling dazed. All he could think of was the fact that this wasn't his apartment that Richie had run out of his own apartment in his haste to get away. Did he expect Gregor to be gone when he got back? Or did he expect Gregor to wait for him?
Gregor's thoughts went round and round for long moments until he made a sudden decision. The only place he could think to look for Richie was at Joe's and if he wasn't there Joe still might be able to answer a few questions. Gregor just wasn't convinced that all this was because he took some pictures without asking.
Fortunately the bar was quiet, it being a weeknight. He knew before entering of course that Richie wasn't inside, but Joe was there, simply lounging against the bar. Gregor sat down on a stool next to the man.
"Hey Greg, where's Richie?" The older mortal was in good spirits, greeting the much older immortal like a real friend. Gregor felt remorse at ruining the man's mood much less that he didn't know how to begin this conversation or if the man would even talk to him.
"He's uh…" Gregor frowned and stopped speaking. He tried again, "Joe, can we talk?" Well that was original, the dark haired immortal thought. The musician sat down, giving the immortal a critical look, but Gregor just sat there not knowing what to say.
Joe being a good bartender spoke up. "Look, I know that the two of you are 'involved' or whatever and hey," he threw his hands up with a cheeky grin, "its none of my business." He paused then his manner becoming stern. "Just don't do anything to hurt him ok?"
"I don't want to hurt him Joe, but he is hurting and I don't…" Gregor shook his head ruefully. "I was taking photos of him earlier," he noted that Joe winced. "And he flipped out." Gregor finished the sentence softly, waiting for the barman to enlighten him. Joe nodded and stood up.
"I don't like giving out information about him, but since it's on the fucking internet…" Joe had begun walking around the bar to the office, Gregor on his heels. After several minutes of furious typing, the monitor was turned so that the immortal could see.
Gregor squatted down to look at the screen. On it there was a photo of a boy, about seven or eight he supposed, kneeling in the center of a large bed. The boy was naked and had a belt secured around his neck which was being held tight by a man's large hand. The rest of the man was out of the photo, but Gregor could clearly see the tear tracts on the boy's cheeks and the bruises that covered his tiny under-nourished body. He could see that the child had curly red blonde hair and blue eyes. Gregor continued to stare at the photo, taking in every aspect of it to postpone having to think about what it meant. The photo was of Richie.
"Does MacLeod know?" he finally stammered.
Joe nodded pain evident in his features and the way he swept his hand over his face. The mortal cleared his throat. "Connor sent the pictures to Duncan, it helped convince Tessa to let the kid move in…" Gregor nodded still numb. "But I don't think he ever said anything to Richie."
Gregor was there when Richie came back to the apartment, sometime after midnight. He had been leaning against the couch's armrest for at least an hour, staring at the door. Now he was staring at the bashful grin of the younger immortal as he walked over. Gregor opened his mouth to speak, but Richie, moving faster than anticipated, covered the dark haired immortal's mouth with a kiss. He tried to remain passive, but Richie's hands were already removing their clothes. First went Richie's shirt, "Greg, I'm sorry…" then Gregor's sweater, "I don't know…" and Richie was stepping out of his sweatpants, "what got into me…"
Richie stopped, finally noticing the reticence of his partner. He drew back to look Gregor in the face and then became still. Gregor didn't know what his face showed the young man, but he could see that Richie's face was stricken.
"You know." The words were said in a surprisingly calm voice. Gregor brought his hands up, to comfort Richie, but the immortal backed away. With a sob, Richie fled into the bedroom. The move was so unexpected that when Gregor got to the door, he found it locked.
Gregor continued futilely turning the handle. "Richie, please, let me in!" He began to throw himself against the door. "Don't do this Richie, don't hide from me!" The older immortal's voice rose in volume, sounding increasingly panicked even to his own ears. He leaned his head on the door. He could hear the anguished sobs of the man within. Gregor took a step back, his resolve strengthened. He would help Richie, had to help him. A few well placed kicks and the door swung open.
The young immortal had seemingly collapsed halfway to the bed. He was crouched on the floor, half naked, sobbing so hard it might have been convulsions. Gregor tried to stay calm as he sat down and drew the other immortal into his arms. He attempted to wrap his entire body around the youth, holding on for dear life, rocking Richie as one would a child. The older immortal sat there, listening to Richie's sobs and cursing everyone who had ever hurt the other immortal, even MacLeod. Damn you MacLeod, Gregor thought. Damn you for hurting him and damn you for not seeing how much Richie was hurting.
They sat there until Gregor's muscles were numb from holding the awkward position and Richie's sobs had quieted to silent trembling. In the dark and the quiet, Gregor admitted to himself that he loved Richie and that he would do anything to prove it to the younger man no matter how long it took.