Prologue

"I live her too, Mom! I want you to be happy, but I can't handle all of this!" Clare slammed the door closed and locked it. She didn't wait for a reply. She didn't want one. She did want to punch herself in the face for revealing so much. The past few months had been filled with lies and fake smiles for her mother's sake, and she had just ruined all that.

A small part of her expected her mother to come after her, to show up in her room with milk and cookies like she'd always done when Clare was upset as a kid. Part of her expected her mother to choose her over Glen.

That part of her was seriously disappointed.

She'd considered it before. A lot, actually. But she'd never gotten this far, never held the blade to her arm. She's never imagined everything she would feel - the anxiety, the anger, the hopelessness, the excitement.

And she'd certainly never imagined actually dragging the blade across her wrist. The blood fascinated her as it beaded and threatened to spill over. She barely noticed the sting as she reached for the blood with a feather-light touch.

Her trance was broken by the sound of footsteps in the hallway. She recognized them as Jake's and quickly shoved her sleeve down to frame her wrist, wincing as it scraped against the fresh cut. Suddenly all of her emotions came back to her in a rush, intensifying as Jake's steps moved closer. And she was just in time - she opened the door to find Jake's hand hanging in the air, about to knock.

He ran his eyes down her body, taking in the circles under her eyes, the disheveled hair and clothing, the frazzled and upset look in her eyes. "Clare? Have you been crying?" She hadn't noticed before, but she could feel the tears on her cheeks now. She stuttered incoherently in an attempt to deny his accusation, but he saw through her and stormed into the room, closing the door behind him. "Are you alright? I heard you and your mom, that was... pretty bad."

"Great, so you know how much of a selfish bitch I am." Hesitantly, but somehow almost confidently, Jake wrapped an arm around Clare's shoulder and guided her to her bed. Once they sat, she practically melted into his grasp. He'd never admit it, but seeing her like that and being so close almost - but not quite - conjured up old feelings.

But despite the fact that she seemed willing to be comforted, he had no idea what to say. He sat with her, just rubbing her arm and letting her cry. He didn't know it, but just being in his arms made her feel better than a razor ever could. Five minutes passed before he spoke. "You're not selfish, Clare. And you're - okay, you can be kind of bitchy sometimes, but we all understand. I know this is a lot to get used to -"

"But it's not something you guys should have to understand!" Clare exclaimed, roughly shrugging off Jake's arm. "Look, I think you should go. Thanks for trying to help, but this is weird."

Clare stood up and tried to usher Jake out, but he stood his ground. "You're not alone in this, Clare. I'm living with new people, the girl I fell in love with is my sister now. It's definitely weird and it's not going to be easy, but we'll survive.

"Yeah, well, we can survive on our own." She grabbed his wrist, and suddenly he was being dragged through the air towards Clare and her lips were on his. He pulled his wrist from her grasp and wrapped his arms around her waist, deepening the kiss.

The feelings that coursed through them as they kiss can hardly be described with words. It was warm and passionate and electric, but they both knew how wrong it was. They were in each other's past.

When they pulled apart a minute later, Jake opened his mouth to question her, but was promptly silenced by Clare's hand connecting with his face. "What the - are you on your period or something?"

"I'm so sorry, I'll go get an ice pack -" Jake held up a hand to quiet her, and after a few awkward beats, they both burst into laughter. "God, I don't even know how to feel right now."

"You just kissed me, then slapped me, then laughed at me. You don't know how to feel?" Clare's face contorted into what Jake had learned was her defensive face, and he smirked, sure he was about to be entertained.

"I-I only slapped you because you kissed me back! I mean, have you no dignity?" She scoffed dramatically, but Jake could tell that underneath the act she was only half-joking. "And, well, that was just a... thank you kiss?"

"Clare, relax. When you live with your ex, these things happen. It's no big deal."She shut up and nodded as a small blush crept onto her cheeks. Jake turned to leave the room, but couldn't help calling over his shoulder - "You're cute when you blush."

She buried her head in her hands as she turned three shades redder. As she raised her head, her flush almost perfectly matched the patch of blood seeping through her sleeve - one that neither she nor Jake had noticed.

Sooo, what did you think? First and foremost, I would like anyone who reviews to PLEASEEE answer this little poll:

Q: Who would you like to see Clare end up with most?

a. Jake

b. Eli

c. Drew

d. KC

e. Adam

f. other (please indicate who)

S'il vous plait et merci beaucoup!

And I know I said first and foremost but I don't really have anything else to say so...thanks for reading! :)