Disclaimer: I don't own GW. Don't sue me, I'm not making any money offa this…
Pain's Lessons
By OmoideKeeper
Trowa's POV
I frantically pushed things into their proper place on the top of the dresser. What had I been thinking to move them? He was coming home, and everything had to be perfect for him. CRASH! The vase I'd been pushing back into place fell to the floor, cutting my bare feet. I stifled a scream of frustration, and also, of fear. Pain was nothing to me anymore, but if he found out...the punishment would be more than just pain.
I scanned the room with my eyes, mentally checking off the things I saw. The bed was made, without any wrinkles marring the delicate satin surface, the pure white sheets fresh and still smelling sweet. The mirrors had been polished, and their wooden frames oiled with the jasmine scent he loved so much. All other objects were in their places, except for the vase I was sweeping up. The blood stains were quickly washed away with a swipe of hot water.
Once, I had made everything
perfect for him because I enjoyed seeing his golden smile light up the room,
because I loved seeing his cerulean eyes fill up with joy. Once, life had
been good. Once, I knew no fear about him.
I quickly struck those
dangerous thoughts from my mind as I heard his footsteps coming up the stairs.
I quickly moved to my assigned place, next to the bed. I surveyed the
room with my mind once more, trying to find something left undone, something
that he would be sure to catch within the next few seconds.
The bath in the next room was
hot and ready, its gentle scent of rose petals floating on the surface wafting
out. The room was freshly cleaned and everything was in its place.
I had done everything he'd asked for, but there was something...I'd forgotten
the chocolates! He'd specifically requested chocolates!
I could feel the sweat beading
on my forehead, and I blessed the fact that my eyes couldn't be seen behind my
mask of hair. His footsteps came closer, and I could feel the fear
growing in me, like a virus, but I knew that there was nothing for it.
I'd have to face his wrath later tonight...but first we'd play this game he'd
started a while ago. After all, the party was tonight, his guests were
coming soon, and everything would have to wait until they'd left. I still
had time before my punishment. Time to contemplate on how to escape.
Who was I kidding? There
was no escape from this.
Duo's POV
He woke up again that night,
biting back the screams I could feel, but were never voiced. I *felt* his
fear, bitter in the pale moonlight. I couldn't ask him what caused those
dreams that always ended with the silent sobs wracking his body, his eyes
streaming tears that held so much meaning for me.
In the morning, he would never
speak of those moments of weakness. He would never say anything about
those long moments that I comforted him through. _Oh, Heero...what
causes you such pain? What makes you lose yourself?_ I asked myself
as I walked towards the stairs to try to find my baka koi.
"Hee-chan!
Hee-chan! Hayaku! We're gonna be late to the party!" I yelled
up at him from downstairs, putting last night out of my mind. He came
down the stairs, and my breath caught in my throat, gazing up at him.
Dammit, he was so beautiful. Just looking at him made me ache with
need. His eyes, such a deep blue, shining through the ruffled dark hair
that never remained straight for long.
"I'm ready, Duo," he
replied, taking time for a long, breath-taking kiss. I melted in his
arms, allowing him the dominance that always seemed so important to him.
He was so gentle with me though, almost as if he was afraid that I would
disappear and leave someone else in my place.
"Just checking," I
explained with a smile, straightening his tie. Actually, his tie was
straight, I just wanted to touch it, and make sure it wouldn't cause a problem
when I slipped it off him after the party.
"So, whose party's this
anyway?" I asked, wrapping my arm around his waist and walking to the door
with him. I'd been living with him for two years now, had him as my boyfriend
for half a year, and he still barely spoke to me unless I asked him
something. Of course, he had his secrets and I had mine, but still!
He could try to tell me stuff every now and then.
Oh well. If I had to ask, I had to ask! It was just another part of our relationship. I did the asking, he did the answering.
"My ex-boyfriend's," he whispered in a cold, unfeeling voice, so much like the one he'd had when I first met him.
Sorry I asked!
Quatre's POV
He thought he could fool
me. That baka-yarou! Nothing escaped my eyes as I walked into the
almost perfect room. I noted the tiny shards of broken glass on the
ground that he'd failed to sweep up in his rush. I saw the blood welling
up on his foot. Did he think that I didn't notice that he'd forgotten the
chocolates I'd asked for? Ah, well. There would be time for
punishment later. For now, I'd have to settle with preparing his mind for
the punishment, and letting him wonder through the party if I'd remember.
And of course, I'd remember. I always remember things like that.
"Trowa," I whipped out his name, capturing the attention I already held captive. I saw the barely perceptible shiver and inside I smiled cruelly. It felt so good to have someone cringe like that the moment I spoke. So good to have someone listen to whatever I said.
"Good evening, Master," he whispered, the air barely carrying that silky voice. His gaze was trained on the ground, looking at the intricate carpet patterns. That carpet was given to me as a gift from him after our first month together. Was he thinking about that? Those times?
"And where are the chocolates I asked for?" I questioned, walking over to him, crossing the room in a few swift steps.
He winced at the sound of my
voice, cutting through the air. "I...forgot, Master..." he
murmured, trying to sound sure of himself, even as he shook in his place.
"I noticed," I
snapped, slapping him across his pale face, enjoying the fear that I felt from
him. "Didn't I specifically ask for them?"
"Y-yes...Master," he replied softly, and I could feel the tremors emitting from him. The secret smile of mine that would be unleashed later grew. Ah, how lovely he was while he was trembling like an animal the moment it realizes that it's about to be killed.
"And you forgot?"
"I'm sorry,
Master..."
"We'll see about that
later. Now, get ready for the party. The guests should be arriving
any minute now, and I want you to greet them."
"Yes, Master."
Trowa bowed deeply to me and left. I could almost feel the relief oozing
from him that he'd gotten off with such little punishment.
That fool! Did he think
that I'd forget at the end of the party? Not likely. Not likely at
all, since Heero's going to be there. Tonight would be such an
interesting night.
Heero's POV
Someone tell me why the hell I
was doing this. I was happy with Duo. Happier than I'd ever been
before. Happier than I ever imagined I could be. So why the HELL
was I going back to that place of pain and suffering? I had no idea.
I'd gone nuts when the invitation showed up. My cool cover had blown, and Duo had to calm me down through his shouts. I couldn't believe that bastard, Quatre, would dare show up here. God, I had tried so hard to forget about Quatre and his sick little games, the lovely little 'punishments.' I'd tried to cover my tracks so he couldn't find me. So how the hell had he found me, and why?
He said it was an informal
gathering, and I was 'invited to join in at my convenience.' Yeah,
right. The invitation was a warning to me. If I didn't show up,
he'd come in with his tame army and MAKE me come, through any means
possible. And Quatre would use EVERY means possible...and that included
the bishounen I had the privilege to call my koibito.
So, to save Duo, I was going. He was so beautiful, I didn't deserve him. Duo's eyes, so blue they touched purple, shone in the dim light of the car. His face betrayed his excitement, and he tried to make me smile.
I'd never told Duo about Quatre.
I didn't want his innocence tainted. Duo was always so happy, and I
didn't want that happiness tainted by my problems. I actually hadn't
wanted him to come tonight, wanting to face Quatre alone, but he'd
insisted. Actually, he'd just made it clear that I didn't have a choice
in the matter. Duo had a bad habit of doing that quite often.
What could Quatre want
now? He'd taken everything from me that he could possibly take...unless
he'd found out about Duo? He couldn't have Duo! Duo couldn't be
hurt like that...I couldn't bear it if he was.
I suddenly realized how
dangerous Duo was to me. He could be used against me by any
opponent...but I wouldn't have it any other way. Duo was my world, all I
lived for, all I breathed for. I would die a thousand deaths for him,
just so he would never have to feel a stroke of pain. Of course, I
thought I had loved Quatre too. I could only hope Duo wouldn't turn out
the way Quatre had. I didn't think I could leave Duo the way I'd left Quatre.
Trowa's POV
I pulled on my 'dress clothes'
and checked my appearance in the mirror. Once I'd been embarrassed when
Quatre had bought this outfit for me. The shirt was white and had no
buttons down the middle, although it was cut like a button down shirt. In
short, it fully exposed my chest. The pants were long and also white, but
they were tighter than even my normal jeans, clinging to the tight form of my
body.
But I wore these clothes for
him. I knew what tonight was about. Tonight would seal my fate, and
I still thought about how everything had to be just as he wanted. For the
announcement.
The slight redness on my cheek
was easily covered by a smudge of the makeup I'd received as an anonymous
present upon my arrival at Quatre's mansion as his boyfriend. Obviously
someone knew more than they let on. When I'd gotten it, I never thought
I'd use it except as a gag present...but that was before he'd changed.
Now it was almost gone, and soon I'd have to find a way to get some more without
him finding out.
I pushed those thoughts out of
my mind. There was no time for memories, not now. Something was
waiting in the air, and I couldn't figure out what it was. I'd seen who
was coming to the party, but I hadn't recognized any names. Should I've
looked closer? Was there something I was missing?
I recited the list in my mind,
remembering who came with who, who was attached and who was not. I was
supposed to greet them as they entered the main hall.
_Relena Peacecraft and her
brother, Milliardo Peacecraft._ Pair one. Milliardo was a
strange character who wore a white mask at times, and would be known as Zechs
during those few times.
_Dorothy Catalonia, and Lady Une._ Pair two. Lady Une was Dorothy's bodyguard, but there were
rumors that she was plotting an assassination attempt on her ward. The
world would be better off without Dorothy anyway.
_Chang WuFei and Sally Po._
Pair three. Sally Po was a doctor, and Chang WuFei was a marshal arts
master. Both were rumored to be very strong, and there was much confusion
on why they were invited to Quatre's party.
_Heero Yuy and Duo Maxwell._
They were the last pair. I knew absolutely nothing about them, except for
their names. There hadn't even been any rumors flying around the house
about them. It was as if they didn't exist.
So, by process of elimination,
and the fact that I had no extra information on them, whatever was going on had
to have something to do with them. What was Quatre, no, Master, not
telling me? I would have to find out on my own. Now, if only I had
a clue on how to figure out what it was.
Duo's POV
Heero was quiet on the drive
to that huge mansion on the edge of town. Unusually quiet. Sure, he
answered my questions and stuff, but he seemed out of it. As if something
was bugging him that he couldn't talk about. Something he wouldn't talk
about.
I wasn't as dumb or innocent
as it seemed. I knew whatever was bugging him had to do with this party
and his ex. I remembered what had happened the day the invitation
arrived. If he was afraid I'd get mad because it was his ex, he didn't
need to worry about anything.
But I had a feeling that
wasn't it. I couldn't explain it, but there was something else going on
here that he wasn't telling me. And it was REALLY beginning to piss me
off. _Hee-chan, why can't you trust me? What is it that you
don't want me to know?_
"So, Heero, what's really
going on?" I finally asked him, sick of playing games with him. I
shouldn't have to dance around topics like this. He should tell me what's
going on! I'm his BOYFRIEND for Hell's sake! "What's this
thing you don't want to tell me?"
Heero stiffened, and I
immediately regretted asking him. "What are you talking about,
Duo?" he responded calmly, but I caught the slight tremor in his
voice. Whatever he was hiding scared the shit out of him, and he couldn't
even admit it. _Damn you, Heero! Why the hell are you so
scared? And more importantly, why can't you just stop acting like an ass
and tell me?_
"You know what I'm
talking about, Heero! This thing you refuse to talk about. This
thing that you always try to stay away from when we're talking. Why're
you afraid of going to this party? What the hell is it that you don't want
me to know?" Too late to back out of it now, I laid all my cards on
the table.
"You don't know what
you're getting yourself into, Duo," he replied, and I heard the ice cold
warning in his voice, laced with an undercoating of steel. "You
don't really want to know."
"Yes, I do! Why
can't you trust me, Heero?" I asked in frustration, trying to get a
response out of him, any response.
"If you're going to ask
me that, then I'll ask you this, Duo. Why can't YOU trust ME?" he
whispered, and I saw the crystalline tears in his eyes.
Shit. Not that
response. He was warning me that he
knew. He knew I had a secret that I couldn't tell him.
Shitshitshitshitshit. This was NOT the way it was supposed to be. I
was supposed to be the one asking the questions. Not the other way
around! It never worked that way before! It never should've started
working that way! I'm not supposed to tell secrets! He's supposed
to tell me, but...I couldn't help but ache, knowing how much pain my refusal to
tell him those deadly secrets was causing him. And those tears...Oh,
Hee-chan, my Hee-chan...I'm sorry...
Quatre's POV
Tonight should be
interesting. Eight people would be there to witness my little
announcement, and only one of them would understand it! But there was
nothing Heero could do to stop me now. Once again, I was in control of
him, and he wouldn't be able to do anything. Helpless again as before,
ne, Heero?
I couldn't believe Heero
actually consented to come. On top of that, not only had he accepted, he
was bringing his new boyfriend. I'd had reports of the pair, the quiet
and loud ones. Duo Maxwell, such a beautiful name. I could only
hope he had a face to match that name. If he did, tonight could be even
more interesting.
It was almost a pity that
Heero would have to be disposed of soon. He was so interesting!
Yare-yare. Sacrifices must be made in order to accomplish the greater
objectives of my plan.
Each of those chosen to come
tonight had been specifically picked from the population of the neighboring
cities for specific reasons. If all went according to plan, each of the
chosen ones would go home ruined, or wouldn't return home at all.
Excepting Heero of course. He would return to his house, alone, and no
one would believe him if he tried to tell anyone what I'd done.
You almost had to pity
Heero. He hadn't realized yet that I'd bought this town long ago.
What couldn't you do with money? Absolutely nothing. Oh, I'm sure,
one day, thousands of years ago, people were morally sound, but now?
There wasn't a person who couldn't be bought, or tamed.
So many lives to ruin, so
little time. I wouldn't even have to do very much. I was giving Une
her opportunity, and the others should take care of each other within moments
of seeing one another. It was almost inevitable really, but I could plead
all innocence. I wasn't specifically PLANNING anything, except, of
course, the announcement.
Yes, the announcement.
The beautiful little words that would bind Trowa to me forever. I knew
that Trowa was thinking about it as well, but with fear, rather than the
pleasure I felt. He had learned well. Even better than Heero had.
If tonight went as planned,
perhaps I'd have another toy to play with. Duo Maxwell...I would have to
see about him. The rumors I'd heard about Heero and him had been
carefully kept from Trowa, so I would be able to see how they reacted to each
other.
Yes, tonight should be an
interesting night.
Heero's POV
Why did Duo shut up the moment
I mentioned his secret? Did he think I didn't see the little signs?
The way he always snuck off after we made love and he thought I was
asleep? The way he always grabbed the phone, and the mail, before I could
answer or look at it? Did he think I would never ask him about it, that I
wouldn't notice that he seemed so distant sometimes, as if he was listening to
a thousand other voices?
I knew what it probably
was. He was probably cheating on me. But what could I do? If
I confronted him about it, I would lose him, maybe forever. If I didn't,
and he was cheating on me, I would lose him anyway, to someone else, but at
least I would have those extra few days, those extra few memories.
Actually, I hadn't planned on
speaking to Duo about it. I never wanted to hear him deny or acknowledge
the fact that he wasn't being true to me, because it never seemed to matter to
me. Just having him near me some of the time was enough. But
hearing him press about Quatre had sent me over the edge of the cliff I always
teetered on.
That look of shock, and anger
that crossed Duo's face the moment I uttered those fateful words stuck in my
mind like a single frame that refused to move from my viewpoint, one I couldn't
move away from. I hadn't meant to say those words to him. But I
thought it'd be ok. I never thought he'd react like that. The anger
reminded me so much of Quatre that day I'd asked him what he was doing...
I forced myself to think of
other things. Duo would never do that. He would never go that
far. But I couldn't be sure anymore. That anger...so intense, so
blazing hot...I never thought I'd feel that type of anger ever again.
To tell the truth, I was
scared of Duo. So scared in that moment, that he'd change, that he'd
become a monster, the way Quatre had. The slimy serpent of fear was
climbing all over me again, and I didn't know if I could stop it from
strangling me this time.
This time, there was no one to
wake me up from this dream...because it wasn't one.