Warnings: Ass Backwards Naruto Characters. On crack. VERY SCARY!

Rated: S for stupidity, language, and sexual themes. (LOL. Like SIMS.)

Backwards Naruto Characters

Gaara stared intently at the frog. It stared back with a rather blank stare. Slowly it let out a "Ribbit." Gaara shrieked, pointing a finger at it.

"NO! Say *Kedo-Kedo! Like the Japanese froggies!"

It stared blankly at him, then in a puff of smoke disappeared. "Stupid American froggies!" Gaara shrieked. Out of nowhere Neji came, tackling him to the ground.

"Get down soldier!" He screamed. "The enemies afoot!" Gaara glared at him. He had better things to do then talk with this odd ball. He had to get that frog and make it say Kedo-Kedo.

Kankuro walked by, waving at Gaara. "Remember Gaara!" He said. "We're having our weekly incestuous threesome tonight!" With that he walked off.

"That's right!" Gaara cried. Neji stared at him. "What?"

"After I eat dinner can I join?" He asked. Gaara scoffed.

"No! You're not penciled in till Wednesday!" With that he left.

"Hello. . . Neji." Came the voice of his rather gothic friend.

"Hi Lee." Neji said. "Welcome to the battlefield.

"Endless death. I love it." Lee's voice was emotionless. In his eyes was his bangs, his hair jagged and his eyeliner impeccable. "But when do I get to eat Choji?"

"Tonight." Neji promised. "I'll have the dog chase him down." He snapped his fingers. "Bring Mr. Crazy out!" Some random guy in white coat came out with a brown haired boy strapped to a wheelchair.

"Here you go." He unstrapped Kiba, who proceeded to foam at the mouth and pull a **Life sizedWhale out of his pocket and hit the guy with it.

"I must hit!" He ran, smacking Gaara, who had shown up again, into the sky, where he shouted,

"I'm blasting off again!" Itachi ran after Kiba, yelling,

"Kibamon! I choose you!" and hitting him with rocks.

"Hey boys!" Came a very girly call. Turning they saw Uchiha Sasuke, the very happy boy with hippy clothes and peace signs. "Hey Sakura, baby." Swinging her- er, I mean his hips, he walked up to Sakura, who had suddenly appeared beside Neji. Neji screamed and ran.

Sakura shook her head in disgust at Sasuke. What a loser. "Sasuke, I told you. I don't like you. I've got the one that matters to me already."

"But Sakura!" Sasuke whined, tugging on her sleeve. "Why does Oorochimaru get all the fun?"

"Because he's ugly. I like ugly." With that, Sakura walked off, and Sasuke stood dejected.

"I'll fuck you." Lee said, looking through his dark bangs. Sasuke sighed and shrugged.

"Ah, Why not?" And jumped him.

Across the town of Konoha, a city very close to Suna, there was a very lazy person laying on a hill.

"Geez. Life is boring." Said the Blonde boy. Naruto sighed and stared at the clouds. All of a sudden, a very hyperactive boy came by holding a pineapple.

"NARUTO! LOOK AT MY WIFE!" Shikamaru held up the pineapple proudly. "Her name Is Pine Apple! Pretty huh?" He was so excited and hyper he was quivering.

OH MY LORD. AND THAT'S WHERE I STOP. I AM SO SORRY! Never again will I write something like this. . . unless you guys review and say you like it and want more! SO SORRY again!

*The Japanese tell kids that that's what frogs make. They actually don't. Like we say the go 'Ribbit'.

**I had a dream once I hit a friend with a life sized whale I pulled from my pocket. Very odd dream.