First Date (One Shot)

by BlackRaion

Ymir and Christa having their first date.

„I hate those stupid partner-tasks…"
Ymir sighted, she was annoyed. Half a year has passed since she joined the military and everything just sucked. Long walks in cold and wet weather, fighting practice with the other recruits, 3DMG training and every time that stupid teamwork. She was more the lone wolf type, she preferred to work and fight alone – Unless it came to her.
"Ymir, don't be so grumpy! Let's be partners today, alright?", Christa said and smiled up to her freckled friend. If Ymir was honest, the only thing she kind of liked were the partner-tasks, because she was able to be alone with Christa. But the last time they had to build teams of two, Reiner asked the blonde girl to team up with him before Ymir was able to and she said yes.
Since then Ymir was angry, she was fucking jealous but she would never show it to her.
But the way Reiner was looking at her goddess and Christa smiling back at him made her raging inside, no one was allowed to come closer to her than Ymir was.
"If you want to be with me so bad, I can't say no, can I?", the taller girl answered with a fake bored voice and Christa rolled her eyes. "If I'm such a burden to you, I can go ask Reiner. I guess you wouldn't mind since your teamwork with Eren last time was such a success? Reiner will be happy if I ask him. He won't be so annoyed like you.", Christa sing-sang and started to turn around to look after the blonde guy. "Please don't remind me of that dumbass…!", Ymir laughed but got no reaction back.
She gnashed her teeth. She didn't want to put off her 'I'm-so-annoyed-and-don't-care-about-anything' facade but she also didn't want Christa to be alone again with the gorilla.
She grabbed the smaller girl's wrist and sighted: "Hey. Sorry, I didn't want to offend you."
Christa turned around again and looked into Ymir's honey-golden eyes.
"Are you sure? I thought offending and insulting others is your favorite hobby.", Christa said with a slightly hurt voice. Ymir's ears twitched at that sound.
"Huh? What do you mean, what's wrong?", the freckled girl asked and started to worry.
Christa looked down and a small sight escaped her throat while she pulled her hand out of Ymir's grip. "Do you know why I said yes to Reiner last time?", she asked and Ymir shook her head.
"I thought so.", the blue-eyed girl said and turned around again.
"Hey, what's wrong shorty? Just tell me, I can't help you if you don't speak to me.", Ymir said and made a step forward to her smaller friend.
"You really don't know why?!", Christa repeated, this time with a more angry voice.
Ymir scratched the back of her neck and sighted.
"Just tell me what I did to make you angry, I really don't know what I could have done to offend you."
The taller girl laid her hands on the other girl's shoulders and she felt the small body stiffen.
"Don't touch me!", Christa almost shouted and Ymir took back her hands immediately.

Single tears appeared in the blonde girl's eyes which she wiped away instantly.
"Christa…hey.", Ymir said with a soft voice before she turned her around and pulled her into her arms and hugged her tight. The smaller girl started to try to push herself away, but Ymir was too strong. "Stop that, alright? Tell me what's wrong. I would never hurt you on purpose. You're the only one I worry and care for, I want to save you from that, I don't want to do that to you."
When those words reached Christa's ears she stopped fighting against Ymir's hold and her finger's dug into the taller girl's grey sweatshirt.
"You're such a meanie…!", Christa whined and punched her little fist on Ymir's chest.
"Oh my god, you're so cute!", Ymir laughed and received another punch for that.
"Ouch! Sorry, don't be angry, okay? And now please finally tell me what I did to make you so upset."
They sat down at a wooden bench outside the main building of the trainings-corps.
Christa took a deep breath and sighted heavily before she started to speak.
"Do you remember when we were on this training-mission in the woods? Were we had to spy on the other teams without getting caught by the others?", she started and Ymir nodded: "Of course, it was about a week ago? When I think about it, you try to avoid me since then."
Christa nodded and continued with her story: "We hide in that old cabin and tried to spy on a team we saw in one of the trees." – "Yeah, I remember that." – "You suddenly pulled me close, like really close…and asked me if I would like it if you take me out for dinner." – "Yep, sounds like something I would do. You said yes, didn't you?" – "Yes, I did. And you know why? B-…because…because I thought you mean it like you said it this time. I thought you asked me out for a-…a-…you know, a-…a date…", Christa blushed and she wasn't able to look Ymir in her eyes anymore.
The freckled girl's eyes widened when she heard Christa's words.
"Uhm…okay and why are you so angry at me? When I asked you after the mission when you want to go out with me you just snapped at me and walked away. I really don't know why.", Ymir said and the blonde girl stroke her hand though her hair.
"I saw you with her.", she said and Ymir raised an eyebrow.
"Eh? With whom and what did I do?", the tanned girl asked with a really confused look on her face.
Christa looked up again with angry eyebrows: "Are you playing games with me, Ymir?!", she said with a straight voice and Ymir raised her hands in defense: "I really don't know what you are talking about! So please just tell me, with who did you saw me? And what did I do in your opinion?"
Christa looked away again with her chin lightly raised and a small pout on her lips.
"Mikasa. You disappeared with her in the canteen after you looked around to make sure nobody saw you. But I did.", Christa said with a hurt voice. "And please don't lie to me, why would you hide with another girl in the empty canteen if not for…for, uhm…some private time?"
Ymir's face froze in shock. She looked down to her feet and she literally felt Christa's heart drop at her reaction. "So you saw us… I'm so sorry, I didn't want you to see that.", she said with a quiet voice and sighted loudly. The blonde girl bit her lip and her face formed a really sad and disappointed expression. "So you're just playing games with me? Nothing you ever did or said to me was honest?"
Ymir raised her head and locked her eyes with Christa's ocean-blue ones.
"…I wouldn't say that.", the taller girl simply told and her opponent formed her hands to fists.
"Why are you doing this to me? I thought we were close to each other, I thought I was important to you. You are important to me, Ymir. Very important. Ymir, you're much more important to me than a girl should be to another girl…!", Christa whined and she felt kind of heartbroken.
Ymir's serious face changed to a bright and evil smile.
"Christa…you are just too cute!", she laughed and the addressed girl stared into Ymir's eyes in confusion. "What I want to tell you is, I don't wanted you to see me sneaking into the canteen. I looked around so this fuckhead Shadis won't catch me or Mikasa. And believe me she's too much into Eren as that she would show any interest in me. Don't worry, cutie, my love belongs to you and no one else.", Ymir explained with a big grin on her face.
"See, you're a mean mean, meanie, Ymir!", Christa shouted at her while ignoring the 'love'-part in Ymir's sentence and punched her shoulder.
"Ouch, stop punching me, short stuff! That hurts!" – "It's supposed to hurt, you idiot!"
Ymir laughed and Christa tried to hold back her laughter. She wasn't able to be angry at the freckled girl, at least not for long. She just loved her too much, everything on her. Her freckles, her dark brown hair, her tanned skin and her shining honey-golden-eyes, just everything. She liked it when she wore her hair open and not tied together, Christa thought she looked sexy with that slightly messy hair, and even her rough way of acting in front of others with her always bored expression was something she liked. Maybe because Ymir changed when they were alone, her cold aura changed to a warm one when she cared for her, it made Christa feel wanted, it made her feel like she was important to Ymir. She never felt that way before, all she ever received was coldness and distance, except when she was in the stables of her old home where she could play with the horses.
They were the only creatures who gave her the feeling of being loved. When the situation got worse and she was sent out to the military she continued as she did before until she met Ymir there.
From the first day on she was at her side, she didn't asked to be, she was just there and Christa let her. She wiped away the cold and filled it with warmth again, she made the blonde girl feel wanted again and she felt like she had a place at Ymir's side. A new place in this cruel and merciless world.
"Hey, I'm really sorry, okay? Mikasa just helped me out with something.", Ymir said and Christa looked up to her with a curious expression. "With what?", she asked and Ymir looked away.
"I'll show you when we have our date, deal?", Ymir answered and Christa pouted but nodded.
"Okay, but don't fool me!" – "I would never fool you, shorty." – "Yeah, for sure."
Ymir laughed again and grinned over to her small friend.
"Oh and, Christa.", she started. "Yes?" – "I would never play games with you. And just for your information, I was always meaning what I said. You just didn't take it serious. I want to date you for a long time now, but you always dismissed it as a joke and just acted polite as always.", Ymir said and got up. She grinned as she knew the blonde girl was heavily blushing without looking at her.
"So, let's have our date tonight, alright? We'll meet here after practice and I'll take you on a date."

The practice was exhausting as always and everyone went inside to take a shower and get ready for dinner. "Has anyone seen Christa and Ymir?", Sasha asked but she just received shaking heads and shrugging shoulders. "Hm…maybe they just went to bed? It was really hard today…"

Christa was nervously waiting outside for Ymir who was already late.
"If this was a joke, I'll kill you…", she mumbled and squeaked when she felt a hand on her shoulder.
"Nah, don't kill me. And by the way, this was the first time I heard you kinda swearing."
It was Ymir who smiled down to Christa while holding a leather bag in her hand.
"I will keep this as a possibility.", the smaller girl said what made Ymir laugh.
"You won't kill me, you love me too much.", she gave back and Christa looked away.
"If you think so.", she simply said and Ymir couldn't help but grin.
"Come with me.", she said and took Christa's hand before she started walking off to the stables.
It was already dark and Christa felt uncomfortable. Normally she wasn't scared with Ymir at her side, but as she was still a bit angry and she didn't knew where she would lead her and if she really wasn't planning some stupid prank on her, so she felt uncomfortable.
"What is in the bag, Ymir? And why do we go to the stables, what is your intention?", Christa asked but didn't received an answer. "Ymir, you scare me, say something!", she said with a light shaking voice, but Ymir stayed silent while pulling her with her into the dark barn and up the wooden stairs which led to the flat roof.
"Ymir, I'm really scared, what do you-…", Christa started but when she saw what the freckled girl had prepared for them, her voice refused to work properly.
She stepped outside on the roof where Ymir had spread out a blanket, some flowers where laying on it and on the edge of every corner of the blanket she put a small gas lamp.
"So, uhm… are you okay?", Ymir asked and looked a bit worried down to Christa who didn't move anymore. She just stared at the small picnic-place Ymir had prepared in disbelief.
She didn't thought that Ymir could be that romantic. She expected an evening with her, sitting together under a tree, laughing and eating together while joking around.
But she did as she said, she prepared a real date for them.
"Christa…?", Ymir repeated and the smaller girl finally answered.
"Uhm, yes, I'm okay. I'm just…speechless.", she said and walked over to the blanket.
"I hope you like it? I wasn't sure and I have to admit, I had help with that. That's why I met with Mikasa in the canteen, you know?", Ymir explained and walked after her.
Christa turned around to the taller girl with a cute smile on her lips.
"It's really nice, I like it!", she said and Ymir let out a loud sight.
"Phew… thank god, I was really nervous about that!", she said and sat down on the blanket with Christa following her. "Mikasa helped me with finding all the things someone needs for a date like that. She also showed me how to 'borrow' food from the canteen's storage. She did that before for a date with Eren she had a few weeks ago.", Ymir continued and Christa's face froze in shock.
"You stole all that?!" – "Shhht! Be quiet, what if someone hears us?" – "You stole that…?"
Ymir giggled: "Nothing you need to worry about, cutie!"
Christa shook her head but smiled again. "You're a hopeless case, Ymir.", she said what made Ymir grin. "Yes, I know. But you like it and you know you do!", she answered and the blonde girl just smirked at that comment without answering on that.
"What do you brought for dinner, Ymir?", she asked and the other girl opened the black leather bag with a big grin on her face. Her heart jumped at the curious face of Christa, it was just too cute.
"I got us some bread, super rare jelly I 'found' in the box for the top brass, a piece of meat and some vegetable-soup. I hope it's still a bit hot… oh and two surprises, but I won't tell you yet!", Ymir answered and Christa's mouth started to water. It wasn't very special, but for them in the military and in times of food shortage things like meat and jelly were very special and expensive.
"I feel guilty for eating those things while the other's just get the bread and soup like every day…", Christa said with a quiet voice and Ymir raised an eyebrow. "Don't be, you have to look at it this way: It's our first date and therefore it has to be special.", Ymir said while putting the food on the blanket together with two plates, two cups and a knife. Christa blushed lightly at Ymir's words, she knew she was right but she still felt a bit guilty. They were partners in crime now.
"Okay, then let's eat!", Ymir smiled and poured the soup out of a bottle into two cups.
"Ymir?" – "Yeah?" – "Did you bring spoons?" – "Oh."
Christa laughed and Ymir scratched the back of her neck. "Sorry…", she mumbled and the blonde girl stroked a strand of hair behind her ear. "It's okay, we can just drink the soup out of the cup, no problem.", she said and Ymir smiled a bit embarrassed to her. "Sorry, guess I'm not a good date-planner.", she said and sighted. "Sometimes you're really cute, Ymir.", Christa giggled and took a sip of soup out of the cup. "I'm not…", she mumbled more to herself than to Christa and tried to hide a smile. The blonde girl caught the little smile Ymir tried to hide and she had to giggle.
"(She always acts so tough and cold, but actually she's quite cute.)", she thought to herself.
"What's so funny?", the freckled girl asked with a raised eyebrow while she cut the bread and meat to place some of it on Christa's plate and then on hers.
"Nothing!", the blonde giggled with a bright smile, "I'm just really happy to be here together with you. I really enjoy it, it's…you know, I can forget about the war, the titans, and the …death out there.", she answered and got more quiet with every word.
"Are you afraid of dying?", Ymir asked and locked her honey-golden eyes with Christa's tropical-blue ones. Christa lowered her gaze and bit her lip, but her expression became softer short after.
"No. No, I'm not afraid of dying.", she answered with a clear voice and stroke a strand of her golden hair behind her ear while taking a bite of the bread Ymir prepared for her.
"Are you?", she asked back and her eyes went up again to meet with Ymir's.
The tanned girl kept looking into her opponents eyes while thinking about an answer to her question.
"Hm. Yes, I am afraid of dying. You know… I'm not willing to give away my life so easily. I don't want to lose it. It was given to me so suddenly, so… randomly. I got a second chance and that's why I'll fight for it as long as I can.", she said with a serious sounding voice and an expression which Christa wasn't able to read. The blonde girl sighted and fold her hands before she looked down on them.
"I'm sorry. I have to sound suicidal. You know, of course I'm afraid of dying itself but… how to say that? I'm not afraid of being actually dead. My life… the life of others here are more important than mine. I'm not worth living, I think… when I can save a life by sacrifice mine, I'll-", Christa said with a low voice but got interrupted by her freckled opponent.
"Don't you EVER say again that your life is less worth than the life of others! Christa, you're definitely worth living. I can only imagine what you've been through but… believe me when I say that it's pointless to live for the sake of others. And yeah, you sound suicidal and you know what? You ARE suicidal, Christa! You-" – "Ymir…! Stop it… please. Why are you so angry…? We are soldiers, we are prepared to die, we-…" Ymir formed her hands to fists but resisted the urge to slam them on the ground. "But that doesn't mean that we HAVE to die, Christa! Why do you urge to die, huh?"
Christa bit her lower lip and her hands were playing nervously with the edge of her shirt.
"…why do you mind, Ymir?" The question was more a whisper, barely hearable but Ymir could hear every word of it. Her shoulders sank down again and her hands relaxed, too.
"Because you matter to me, Christa. I care for you, you are important to me, because we are similar. We both used to betray ourselves, we lied to ourselves. Well, you still do as it seems. You're better than that, Christa. Way better." The blue eyes of her opponent widened at those words.
"How…d-…do you know? Do you know…?", the smaller girl stuttered and Ymir sighted loudly.
"I know that you are hiding your real identity, but I won't tell anyone, I promise. I don't care either who you really are, I just care for you as a person, as the person I got to know, the one I… I…", Ymir started but obviously went too far than she wanted and now she started a sentence she didn't want to reveal for now. Christa's eyebrows formed to a worried expression and Ymir decided it wouldn't matter now. With a ridiculous smile on her face she continued, not able to look in her eyes:
"…the one I fell in love with."
There was silence for a few seconds but it felt way longer. None of them was able to look up so both just stared at their hands until Ymir opened her mouth again.
"I'm sorry, I obviously messed up. I mean, who's stupid enough to say those words on a first date?", she laughed, it was obviously fake and Christa recognized it.
When she looked up, there was something she never saw before, it made her feel insecure.
It was a nervous, almost anxious and totally vulnerable Ymir.
Christa got up and walked around the blanket to kneel beneath the other girl and wrapped her arms around her tight while one hand was laying on top of the brunettes head, pushing her lightly against her chest. "It's okay, don't worry.", she whispered. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have say such things…"
She stroked gentle over Ymir's tensed back and hoped that this would help her relax again.
"No… no I'm sorry for what I said.", Ymir whispered and sighted. "Just forget it."
Christa shook her head: "No, I don't want to forget that you have feelings for me."
Ymir chuckled desperate and looked up to face her. "Why?", she simply asked and waited for a respond from the blonde. Christa smiled with a worried expression on her face and caressed Ymir's cheek gentle with her hand before she answered: "Because you matter to me. You… hm, how to say? You're helping me living my life. You're always there for me and I… you know, I have feelings for you, too. I just don't know how to… categorize them. I never had romantic feeling for someone, so I don't know how it feels…I mean, I just turned 15, you are almost 18, you know better what you want."
Ymir' expression remained quite neutral with a hint of deep sadness in her eyes.
It took a while until she found words to answer, her voice was totally calm:
"I see. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have confess so crude. You deserve better, but you know that I'm a really shitty human being, so… I don't know if you already expected me to be like this."
Christa chuckled on that comment and took Ymir's cheeks ins her palms while smiling lovely at her.
"You're not shitty, Ymir. You are like you are and I like the way you are. Please don't change, you're way of living teaches me so much, I owe you so much. I don't know what I would do without you, even if we know each other for just short six months now.", the smaller girl said and bit her lower lip while trying to find words for what she wanted to say. Ymir closed her eyes on the feeling of her crush's small and soft palm on her cheeks and leaned in the touch while taking a deep breath.
"The cause I wanted to have this date with you is that I want to find out the meaning of this… this feeling I get when I'm around you. I don't know what it is and I'm a bit embarrassed about it to be honest…", Christa continued with a nervous voice.
Ymir opened her eyes again to see that the blonde girl was the one with closed eyes now.
"What do you feel when we are together?", she asked and laid her hands on the tender girl's tights.
Christa's eyes opened again but she stared on Ymir's hands on her legs.
""I-… I don't know how to say that, it will sound stupid, I'm sure… I never felt that before and you know, I'm afraid about what you will think of me afterwards.", she mumbled and put her hands on Ymir's to grab them lightly. "You can tell me everything, I won't laugh or judge you, I promise."
Christa took a deep breath and her gaze wandered to the side. She focused on the flame which was in one of the lamps Ymir brought for their date. There was no going back now, she knew it.
"When I'm with you my stomach feels kind of… funny. I can't explain it, it tingles, I'm like…excited, I don't know. When we share a bed when it's cold or when I had a nightmare your warmth takes over my whole body, it feels like you're giving me your warmth on purpose, it makes me feel safe. And although I'm calming down, thanks to your warmth and your arms you always wrap around me, my heart starts pounding really fast…", she tried to explain and sighted loudly.
Her eyes went back to meet Ymir's before she continued: "This must sound totally stupid…"
Ymir couldn't help it, a bright smile formed on her lips and Christa instantly pouted.
"Hey, you promised not to laugh Ymir, that's mean…!", she complained and Ymir laid her hand on Christa's right cheek before she tilted her head lightly with the smile remaining on her face.
"I'm not laughing, I'm just thinking how incredible cute you are and you're way more innocent than I already thought you were. Christa, this is what it feels like to fall in love. There is nothing embarrassing with that, it's totally normal when you develop romantic feelings for someone.", Ymir explained to her with a soft but quite dark voice what made the smaller girl blush heavily.
Ymir chuckled on Christa's bright blushing and let go of her cheek before she took a deep breath.
"What do you think of having a few more dates so you can find out what you want?", she asked.
Christa stroke a strand of her blonde hair behind her ear and nodded as she wasn't able to answer on that properly. "Hey, don't be so embarrassed, huh? Everything is okay, I can wait for an answer."
Christa looked up and faced Ymir again: "But… I don't want to hurt you. I'm afraid, you're so important to me, I don't want to lose you…"
Her eyes were filled with fear and Ymir couldn't stand it, she took her head in her palms again and kissed her forehead lovingly. "Don't be afraid. You won't lose me, no matter what your answer is. If you want to be my girlfriend someday I'll be more than happy. If you realize you don't want that I'll be okay with it, too. I just want you to be happy. So no matter what happens, you won't lose me.", Ymir said with a calm voice and Christa released her breath she didn't realized she was holding.
She smiled when she felt Ymir's soft and careful kiss on her skin: "I would love to date you, Ymir."