Chapter 1: Keeping Beach City weird
Steven and Connie were out on a jaunt on the beach, not far from the gems' hideout. Exuberant as always, Steven dashed ahead, pulling Connie along by the hand.
"Steven, where are we even going?" Connie wondered between gasps for air. Man, Steven could run really fast despite his body type.
"I heard there's a boat going out somewhere cool. I figured we could catch it, and, y'know, take a vacation for the weekend."
"What?! Do the gems know?"
"Of course! Oh… Are your parents gonna mind?" They stopped, both hunched over to catch their breath.
"Um… I can just text them to say I'll be sleeping over at a friends house. It's not a big deal."
"You sure?" Steven was worried; he didn't want Connie to get in trouble.
"Yeah. It's fine," Connie wasn't even sure if it was going to be fine, but she was to excited. A weekend trip on a mysterious boat with Steven? What could be better?
Soon, the young couple reached the dock. Onion was there with Sour Cream.
"Hey, Onion!" Steven ran over to say hello. Onion nodded stiffly, in that sort of creepy way he had about him, and Sour Cream waved hello. Steven turned to Connie.
"Is it me, or could Sour Cream and Onion be related?"
"Yeah, it seems like it. Their names are too much of a coincidence for it not to be true, and besides, their hair and skin is the same color."
"Wanna ask them?"
"Um… Hey, I think that's our ship!" Connie pointed at a large vessel approaching the dock. The sky around it was a dingy grey, laden with rain clouds.
"Yeah, I think that's the one!" Steven's face lit up. "Come on, Connie, let's go aboard!"
Waiting in line, it dawned on Connie that she had no money with her.
"Oh no! Steven, how are we gonna pay for our fare?"
"Our what now?"
"It costs money to get on a boat, silly!"
Steven didn't even look worried for a second.
"Don't worry, Connie. I got this."
When it was their turn to pay, Steven fished in his Hamburger Backpack and retrieved a few brightly-colored crystals. The attendant eagerly took them as payment, and followed the last of the passengers onto the boat.
"Are you sure you should be using gems as money?" Connie was skeptical.
"Why not?" Before Connie could reply, Steven charged over to a cabin door.
"Hey, I think this is us."
"Y-you only got one cabin for the two of us?" Connie went red-faced.
"Oh… I didn't think about that…" If Connie's face was a strawberry color, then Steven's was the hue of a ripe tomato, deeply scarlet.
"It's okay. We'll make do." Connie winked.
The boat ride was uneventful. Since it started to rain right after they embarked, the kids stayed in their cabin.
"So, where are we going, anyway?"
"Um, it's a place called…" Steven scratched his chin as he consulted a leaflet. "Gravity falls. I guess it's some kind of little rural place in the forest."
"Sounds nice! Quaint." This didn't sound too bad to Connie.
"I thought so." Steven said, then leaned in close. "Just between you and me, I heard there was some weird stuff going on there. Maybe gem stuff."
"Oh," Connie wasn't listening to Steven's voice just then. She was focusing on his full complexion, his silly upturned nose, and his thick, defined eyebrows.
"Connie? What's the matter?" Steven tilted his head quizzically. Without thinking, Connie replied.
"This cabin feels sort of… Romantic."
Steven laughed uneasily. "Heh heh… You think?"
"Yeah," she said, a lusty look in her eyes. For once, Steven caught her mood and smiled back dreamily. Just then, the boat's whistle blasted, breaking the delicate mood.
"Oh, hey! We're here!" Steven burst through the cabin door and out to the front of the boat's hallway, where the ramp was dropped at a boardwalk at the edge of a lake. Connie cursed. She had been so close to a kiss. Maybe later…
"I don't get why you're so excited, Dipper… It's just a boat of boring tourists." Mabel said, kicking her legs absently in the air as she lay on her stomach on her cushy bed.
"Don't you see? The boat's coming from Beach City."
"Where?" Mabel was lost.
"The Beach City." Dipper beamed. "Of the famous blog, "Keep Beach City Weird". I know I've told you about it."
"I still don't get it." Mabel flipped the page in her sticker album and was greeted by a plethora of sparkly shapes.
"All sorts of crazy stuff happens in Beach City. I heard aliens live there!"
"Yeah, right." Mabel scoffed.
"Are you serious? After everything we've seen, you don't even consider the possibility that aliens exist?"
"Maybe they do," Mabel said absently. "But why would they live in some place called Beach City? I thought all the weird stuff was here, in Gravity Falls."
"That's what I thought, too…" Dipper furrowed his brow and stared blankly at the wall, resting his chin on his fist. "Until I found that blog. I'm sure of it… There are aliens in Beach City, and some of them might have come on that boat." He hopped to his feet. "I'm going to the lake. That's where the boat is now. Wanna come?"
"Oh, fine. You can only look at so many sparkly stickers before you start seeing spots." Mabel stashed the colorful pad under her bed and followed Dipper downstairs.
Soon, the boat's passengers filed off, and Dipper watched them from the bushes with binoculars. Mabel walked over holding an ice cream cone in each hand, obscuring Dipper's line of sight.
"Hey, Mabel, move it!"
"Oh, okay. I guess I'll eat both these cones by myself. It's a shame; I don't really like gummy bears, but this one is covered in them."
"W-wait! You put gummy bears on mine? Lemme have it!"
"Uh-uh. Not until you come out of the bushes and wait like a normal person."
"Ugh. Mabel, why are you so stubborn?" Dipper grinned at his sister as he pocketed his binoculars and took his ice cream (it was more gummies than actual ice cream, actually).
A chubby boy with a star on his shirt came off the boat with a wary, intellectual-looking girl in glasses. Dipper didn't say anything, but that girl was a looker. These two kids, about the twins' age, were the last ones off the boat. Just as they stepped onto the boardwalk, the boat exploded, and a huge, lime-green creature that looked a bit like an anteater with a big crystal on its snout jumped from the wreckage.
"Oh, man! What did I tell you, Mabel? Huh? Aliens, so there."
"Shouldn't we, like, run?"
"Oh, right." Dipper and Mabel screamed as they fled into the forest. The star-shirted boy and his girlfriend followed just behind, looking almost as terrified as the civilians that were now running in panicked circles. Wait, was she that kid's girlfriend? Dipper thought they had been holding hands, but he wasn't sure. Oh, well. Right now his priority was not getting eaten by a giant green anteater/alien. It seemed this weekend would be eventful, even by Gravity Falls' high standards…