Hopper was going to be spending Valentine's night at the Byers' house. Jonathan planned to be away, and Joyce didn't want to leave Will home alone. Hopper hadn't spent the night with her in nearly a month, so needless to say, he was looking forward to it.
He made El promise that she would be fine if he left her alone for the night. He felt bad leaving her on a "holiday," but El swore up and down that she would be just fine; she reminded him that she spent many nights alone before. He wasn't sure why she didn't want to have a sleepover at Joyce's too, but he didn't press it. She'd been spending a lot of time with Will and maybe they were getting sick of each other's company.
"Ugggh," Hopper groaned when Joyce left his lap to answer the phone.
"No Karen, he's not here…huh. Yes, you're welcome," he heard her say.
"That's weird," she said coming back to Hopper's lap after hanging up. "That was Karen Wheeler. Mike told her he was staying here tonight," she shrugged.
No, no, no, those sneaky little brats. It suddenly became clear why El didn't want to come along.
"That little rat bastard," Hopper swore, heading towards the door.
Joyce grabbed his arm to stop him. "What is it?" she asked, confused.
"Mike said he was staying here tonight…" he commented as if it were that obvious. "I'll give you one guess as to where he actually is." Hopper's tone was dangerous.
"They wouldn't do that," Joyce laughed, knowing El wouldn't dare break that rule. Mike wasn't allowed to spend the night, especially if there were no adults home.
Hopper moved towards the door anyway.
"Oh come on Hop. You are being ridiculous."
"Yeah? If I'm wrong, I'll apologize when I get there," he muttered, slamming the door.
Joyce stumbled behind trying to get her shoes on.
He turned around and saw her following. "You don't have to come."
"I think you'll be needing witnesses," she smirked, getting in the car.
Earlier that evening…
"Are you crazy El?! I don't have a death wish," Mike balked.
"He's going to be gone all night. He won't even know," El promised. "We'll wake up early just in case."
"Hopper would murder me if he found out that I spent the night," he reiterated.
"I would protect you," she laughed. "Please Mike?" She knew Mike couldn't say no if she asked nicely.
"Just…okay, fine. Give me a little bit okay?" Mike surrendered.
"Try and hurry," El encouraged.
They hung up, and El bustled around, picking up the house and cleaning her bedroom.
In 45 minutes, Mike knocked on the door and El ushered him in excitedly. The night was innocent enough. Mike had brought her a box of Valentine's chocolates, which they proceeded to eat almost all of for dinner. They played Sorry, Chinese Checkers, and Uno in El's room, until she stopped between games and cuddled up next to him.
"Are you tired?" Mike asked. He wrapped his arm around her shoulders.
El shrugged. She wasn't feeling tired exactly, but quite relaxed. Then she had an idea. She abruptly popped up and ran out of the room. When she came back, she was holding a half empty pint of vodka.
"Do you want to try it?" she smiled deviously.
"El, we shouldn't. Don't you think he'd notice if some went missing?" Mike rationalized, trying to be the responsible one.
"Just a little bit," urged El, the bottle already at her lips.
She took a swig and shivered, pulling her eyebrows together.
"Ugh. How does he drink this?!" She took another sip and shuddered again. She handed the bottle to Mike. It smelled absolutely disgusting, but he took a drink anyway.
"Well you're supposed to mix it in like orange juice or something," Mike laughed, giving the bottle back to her.
El made another face. "That would just ruin the orange juice!"
She put the cap back on and went out to put the bottle back in its place where she had found it. She curled back up next to Mike and in a few minutes, started feeling a little bit strange. Her head was kind of fuzzy and she felt an odd urge to do something.
She sat up and straddled Mike's hips, pushing him back against the pillows, kissing him hard. They kissed this way for a few minutes until she grabbed Mike's hand, bringing it up under her shirt. Mike's eyes went wide, and he was frozen for a moment, not believing that El had really just done that. El giggled and removed her hand leaving his stranded under her shirt. Mike slowly dropped his hand to the bare skin of her ribs and just awkwardly held it there instead. They'd never gone this far, and he had absolutely no idea what he was doing.
El pulled back and removed Mike's shirt with zero objections from him. She was too hot, so she knew Mike had to be too. She got up and took off her own pants, standing only in her underwear and t-shirt. She climbed back on the bed and moved her hands down his chest.
"El…" Mike said breathlessly, pulling away. "I don't think, uh, we shouldn't, you know…"
"I want you to touch me. Here," El whispered, grabbing his hand. She pulled it down and pressed it against the outside fabric of her underwear.
"El," he groaned again.
"Please Mike," she whimpered. "Don't you to?"
"Yes," he immediately answered. "Yes, I want to. But I just think we should wait, you know? I'm not really ready for that."
El whined in defeat. She got off of him and rolled over. Mike cringed, thinking that he really blew it this time.
"El, I'm sorry," he apologized.
El rolled back over to look at him. "I'm sorry too." She was embarrassed that she had let herself get carried away. She hadn't planned on doing anything like that when she invited him over to spend the night, and now she ruined their one night together. "You don't have to stay if you don't want to," El whispered sadly.
"I want to," Mike answered immediately. "I mean, if you still want me too."
El nodded, and a shiver ran through her body. She wondered how only a moment ago she could be so warm, and now she was freezing. Mike pulled the covers up over her and laid down behind her.
"Do you want the lights off?" Mike asked after a minute. Before he had a chance to get up to turn them off, they shut off on their own. Oh right, Mike laughed to himself. She didn't need to use her powers much anymore and sometimes he forgot she even had them.
"I'm sorry I'm stupid sometimes," El whispered once they got settled back in bed.
"You aren't stupid El."
"No. I can be. Sometimes." She curled up against his bare chest, and he wrapped his arm around her again.
"I think it was just, you know, the alcohol. I was feeling kind of weird too," Mike excused softly, rubbing her arm.
"Hm," El considered. That actually made sense. Hopper acted stupid all the time and sometimes he was drinking alcohol. "I'm not drinking that ever again," she vowed.
"Yeah, it's disgusting anyway," Mike agreed.
They didn't say anything more, and though it was early, they drifted off to sleep without even saying goodnight to each other.
Meanwhile, Hopper stomped through the woods, not exactly sure what he was going to do if he was actually right. He hoped that Joyce was correct, that he was just being ridiculous. But he had a feeling that he wasn't.
Mike heard a noise outside and woke up almost immediately, listening. He heard the front door open and Joyce's hushed voice say, "She's probably just asleep already."
A light came on and he heard the creak of foot steps walking across the floor.
Shit. Shit. Shit.
They would both be dead if Hopper found them. Mike had no time to think. He rolled away from El and shimmied into the crack between the wall and the bed, sliding underneath as best he could. He pulled the blankets back over the now larger space he had made between the bed and wall. His heart raced, and he didn't dare to even breathe. El's light flipped on, and he heard El's surprised voice.
"What are you doing here?" she asked, rubbing her eyes. She glanced next to her and saw that Mike was not there.
"I just, uh," Hopper said, looking around the room. "Just wanted to make sure you were alright," he finished, softer now.
El had been asleep and alone, just like Joyce had said.
"I'm fine," El said playing the confused part very well.
"Okay, yeah. Sorry to wake you up," he apologized, shutting her light off.
El glanced to the floor where Mike's shirt laid underneath her pants; Hopper hadn't seen it.
She heard Hopper speaking to Joyce in the living room.
"Mike?" El hissed.
She listened and then she heard him whisper her name from behind the bed. El pulled back the covers and saw him, or at least part of him. "You have to go!" she exclaimed worriedly.
"I know. We have to wait until he leaves," Mike whispered back.
"I can get you out the window," El promised.
Mike thought about the window in her room. It was small, but he thought he could fit.
"Hurry," she urged, helping him out from the crack of the bed.
She opened the sliding glass pane with the flick of her head, and Mike found himself being catapulted through the air. He tumbled on the ground, landing hard on the leaves outside her bedroom. The curtain slid closed behind him just as Hopper reappeared in her doorway. El quickly wiped her nose, trying to make it look like she was just yawning.
Her light flipped back on, and El knew immediately that Hopper was pissed.
"So I found these out front," he began, walking around her bedroom, looking around. He was holding up Mike's dirty black tennis shoes. He'd seen them at the front door a hundred times; there was no mistaking who they belonged to.
El was frozen, trying to think of an excuse. Hopper tore her covers back, half expecting to find Mike hiding under them. Only, there was no Mike, just his half naked kid instead.
"Where is he?"
"Who?" El asked as innocently as possible, curling her bare legs back up.
"Do you think I'm an idiot?"
He looked under the bed, not finding Mike, but finding his green and blue striped shirt instead.
El closed her eyes and thought maybe she could muster up a new power, one like Kali's to make them both disappear for a minute. Hopper saw the blood drip from her nose.
"No. Uh-uh, stop that. Now," he warned, not knowing exactly what she had been trying to do.
El's eyes snapped back open and she wiped her nose; it obviously wasn't working anyway.
"You might as well go ahead and tell me. It's going to be worse if I find him," Hopper threatened. The cold wind blew through the curtain in front of the still open window. They both looked up at it at the same time, and El knew they were 100% busted.
Hopper moved towards the front door and El followed, grabbing his arm to stop him.
He pulled away with a warning. "Stay. Here."
El stood at the door as directed, freezing when the wind blew in. She listened to see if Mike was going to need help. After all, she promised to protect him.
"Sweetie, you know better," Joyce lectured, approaching from behind. El turned around to see how disappointed she looked. El knew Hopper would be mad, but she made him mad all the time; she especially didn't like disappointing Joyce.
After a minute, El heard the leaves crunching and saw a barefoot, shirtless Mike walking in front of Hopper back towards the door. He looked like he might be sick.
"Both of you sit," Hopper growled, slamming the door behind him.
"Hop," Joyce said, hoping he would go easy on the two of them. They really were good kids, good kids who just made dumb teenage mistakes sometimes.
"No, Joyce. They wanted to play house like adults so now they get to sit down and get talked to like adults." His calm tone was the most concerning part.
"We were just sleeping," El interjected stubbornly.
"Ah, sleeping," Hopper repeated.
Mike sometimes envied El's hard-head, but right now he wished she would stay quiet. They weren't going to win this fight.
Hopper threw Mike's balled up shirt at him. "So this is, what, the kind of sleep where your clothes just magically end up on the floor?"
"We weren't doing anything," El reiterated.
"And the two of you will not be doing anything for, oh, I don't know, the next 3 years of your life. If I even decide to let you two see each other again."
"Yes, sir," Mike agreed quickly hoping that he could end this torture.
El sat quietly, looking at her hands in her lap.
"You. Out, now," Hopper stated pointing at the door.
"I'll take him home," Joyce said. She stepped over to Hopper and spoke softly. "Go easy on her. You were 15 once too." She gave him a quick kiss on the cheek and headed out the door. Mike told Joyce that he was fine because he had his bike hidden in the woods, but she wouldn't take no for an answer. Mike knew another lecture was coming.
"So, your mother called our house looking for you," Joyce explained to him once they got in the car.
Oh my God, he was an idiot. Of all the places to lie about where he was staying, he had to say the one place that he knew Hopper would be at. Maybe he deserved to die from stupidity.
"I'm really sorry Mrs. Byers," Mike apologized again.
"I'm not going to tell your mom, but I can't promise what Hopper's going to do. He's pretty upset," she said stating the obvious.
Mike thanked her and the rest of the ride was silent as he prepared for the storm that was coming when he got home and had to tell his parents before the Chief did.
Back at the cabin, an entirely different conversation was happening.
Hopper waited a long time to speak and El thought she might be getting the silent treatment. She would rather have him yelling and shouting at her because that was expected; she didn't like the silence.
He eventually sat down on the other end of the couch.
"I'm sorry I broke the rules. I was stupid," El said finally, hoping he would reply.
"It's not only that you broke the rules. You lied to me El."
"I wasn't lying about the sleeping part," El promised, like it would make any difference.
Hopper sighed and threw his head back against the back of the couch. "I know that you kids think you know everything there is, but Jesus El, you are just too young to be with Mike like that," he explained.
"I'm 15," El stated, as if he had forgotten.
"Yes. And that's too young to be in bed with your clothes off," he pointed at her bare legs. El grabbed a blanket and covered up. "It's too young," he reiterated. It was almost as if he had forgotten what he was like at 15 years old, or maybe he remembered exactly what he was like at 15 years old.
"I know. That's what Mike told me too," El revealed.
Great, that's just fucking great, Hopper thought. So I have the hornier of the two kids.
"Why is everyone so obsessed with sex anyway?" El wondered out loud.
"What?" he finally managed to get out.
"I mean, parents are so obsessed with us kids having sex now that suddenly we can never be alone anymore because we might be doing it. It's not like we are naked and going at it every second that you guys aren't around," she complained.
He was still beyond pissed, but he did appreciate her honesty. Even though it sounded exactly like something he would have said when he was younger, despite the fact that he was indeed, 'naked and going at it every second' when his parents weren't around.
"Based on how I found you two tonight, you could have fooled me."
"Well I'm not lying about that. Me and Mike aren't ready for that yet."
"I'm glad to hear that," he finally said after careful consideration. "It's just, I don't want you two sneaking around. We have rules for a reason. When you break them and do stupid stuff, accidents can happen."
As much as he wanted to yell at her, and despite how he hadn't wanted to hear absolutely any of this from her mouth, he was having a hard time punishing her for being honest. They had a relatively open relationship, and he wanted to keep it that way. It was also why El going behind his back had made him so upset.
El nodded. "I'm sorry."
"You are grounded. For a month," he added.
"From Eggos and TV?" El asked remembering what grounded meant.
"Well, see, now that you leave the house there is a lot more to be grounded from. It basically means that you don't get to go anywhere or do anything with your friends, including Mike, for one entire month. It's the consequence for your poor choices tonight."
Even though she was angry, she didn't argue like the last time she got grounded, and Hopper was surprised not to hear any objections.
"You need to go to bed now," he decided after a moment.
"'Kay," El replied. "Sorry," she muttered one more time before she walked to her bedroom. She didn't unwrap the blanket from around her body because she didn't want Hopper to remember that she was still half naked.
Once El was safely back in bed, Hopper walked over to the cabinet where he kept his small stash of alcohol. He pulled the bottle of vodka out, none the wiser as to where it had been earlier that night. He carried it back, taking 3 long drinks from the now, close to empty, bottle. He slumped down on the couch and noticed a nearly empty heart shaped box of chocolates on the end table.
Fuck. Nobody ever said raising a teenage daughter was going to be easy.