Summary: Julie-centric. All about why Julie turned out the way she did, and why her relationship with her daughters is as strained as it is…
Warnings: Language and possibly some mature content in later chapters, depending on how I feel about it
Pairings: Haven't decided yet, if you guys would like to see anything specific (het pairings only…obviously, but I just thought I'd make it clear), let me know in a review. You can pair up anyone you like, and I'll consider it.
Disclaimer: I don't own the OC…
Enjoy
BTW the first italicized part is Julie's diary entry from at her 10tth birthday party.
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Daddy hit me again today…it hurt so much, but where he hit me, that didn't hurt. The only thing that hurt was my heart. Wasn't he supposed to be my daddy? Wasn't he supposed to love me? And where was mum, when he hurt me? I saw her partying and drinking. She always yells at me, she always yells at me to go play with Bryan and spend all my time with him, even though I wanted to play tag with Haniah, mum didn't let me, saying I deserved better than Haniah and that she would always take care of me. I don't get it…what did mummy mean by that? Mum doesn't take care of me…all those pretty ladies do…those nannies…'cept mum says they're not pretty…mum says I'm pretty and always yells at daddy to stop hitting me and ruining my perfectness…but when daddy does it, she's never around…or she jut doesn't notice even if she's in the same room…I don't understand…why can't I hang out with Haniah anymore? Why does mum keep saying I'm pretty? Why can't I go to any birthday parties anymore? Why does mum keep saying that "I'm too old for that"? Why doesn't she let me hang out with my friends anymore? Why does she keep forcing me to play with Bryan, and hang out with all the daughters of her friends that she invites to her parties? I don't understand anything…God, can you please explain it to me? Please could someone help me?
Julie Cooper wiped away the small black tear trickling down her smooth cheek. The memories hurt, drawing up pain that she had buried so deep in her chest for as long as she could remember. She was always the unwanted one, always the one that had to stand, looking pretty, never speaking unless spoken to. She was always the one that had to always act ladylike, and perfect. She was always the one that had to have the classiest, richest boyfriend in town. She was the one that had to pretend that she was perfect, loved, wonderful, the best, and it was a well-known fact: If you pretend to be someone you're not, for too long, then that's the person you become. So this was who Julie Cooper was today: beautiful, young, rich, manipulating, very skilled at getting her own way (which was a useful skill to have in Newport), famous, independent, successful, and represented the best of the best in Newport Harbor. However, Julie would have traded everything in, if only she could be the one thing she wasn't: the perfect mom.
No one could really blame her for the lack of parenting skill. She herself had grown up with one hell of an overcontrolling and overobsessive mother who had only cared about whether or not Julie was pretty, popular, had the perfect boyfriend, and didn't embarrass her or her husband. Julie had grown up with a self-centered mother who had only cared about her daughter in terms of social status and looks, control and reputation. She didn't care if her daughter had any friends, or did well in life or not, all she cared about was everything that reflected on her. And of course, Julie had had an abusive father, so one really couldn't blame her for not wanting to do the same thing to her children.
Unfortunately, there were two problems with Julie Cooper's theory:
The first, was that anywhere else in the world, the theory that 'I can be a better mother than my own was' will work anywhere in the world, if only you put enough effort into it. Except Newport. In Newport, the past has a habit of repeating itself, and the town's mentality in itself, really sabotages the notion of 'responsible parenting'.
And the second: Everyone blamed her for the wild ways in which her daughters were turning out and growing up, anyway. Why? Because nobody knew. Nobody knew of Julie Cooper's life. And nobody knew of the internal struggles she went through everyday.
Nobody knew that Julie Cooper wasn't as perfect as she seemed, after all.
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Might have been slightly confusing, I know. But I'm trying. This is officially my first OC multichapter. Please be nice and leave a review…chapters will get longer, hopefully, but I'm not promising regular updates, updates will be pretty rare and far in between, as I am semi-retired. [Details are on my profile but I will try to update whenever I can. Please let me know if you liked it or not!