I don't own fairy tail (i wish though), but i'm borrowing them for a bit

**These events are before phantom lord attacked the guild

Mira had just told Lucy how natsu got Happy.

"That's such a cute story, but if I may ask, who's that girl that resembles you and elfman?" lucy asks

Mira face slips into a broken, sad expression. "That's Lisanna, my sister…"

"What happened to her?"lucy asks cautiously.

"She passed away about 2 years ago. I know you're going to ask what happened so i'll tell you. The day sh-"

"Don't tell anything you don't feel comfortable saying. If you don't want to tell me I respect that"

"It's okay. The day Lisanna died, Elfman, her and I were going on an S-class mission to defeat this monster thing. While on the mission, Elfman tried the full body take-over. It didn't go so well with his mind being taken over by the beast as well. Lisanna tried to talk him some sense, but he lost control and hit her into a far-away tree. Elfman realized what he had done but the damage had been done. I ran to her as fast as i could, but I i was too slow to save her. She died in my arms." Mira's eyes started to water. "Natsu was broken. He and lisanna we really close. They were a cute couple! But Natsu never once blamed Elfman for his actions, so we both have pretty high respect for him for not getting angry at us."

But lucy didn't hear anything after Mira said that they were a cute couple. She couldn't hear after that. I knew he had a girlfriend. He doesn't love you. No one could ever love you. You was just leading you on to be nice. You aren't even good enough for him. You're too fat, ugly, stupid, annoying and worthless for his liking or for anyone elses liking for that matter. She had to get home and fast. Luckily Mira was done talking.

"I'm so sorry about that, but i must be going. Thank you for opening up."

" no problem! See you later."

Lucy see rushed out the door and started running home, tears streaming down her face even when she tried to hold them back. When she got home, she ran straight to her bathroom and stuck 2 fingers down her throat, causing her to gag then throw up. The taste of acid on her tongue was satisfying. Lucy did this everyday when she got home, sometimes when natsu was here, she would use the excuse. I'm not feeling well. When she didn't feel that fat anymore, she turned to the sink. She caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror, totally shattering her last thought. I still look like a fat pig. She reached down opening a drawer, reached to the very end of the drawer to find her razors. She grabs one and pulled up her sleeve and slit her wrists. She turned back to the toilet and squeezed her fresh cut causing blood to ooze into the toilet. Relief washed over her for a brief moment only to return back to her previous state: vile disgust towards herself and unexplainable sadness. Therefore she slit her wrist for the second, third, fourth, fifth and sixth time. She realized the was overdoing it and it would be difficult to cover these up. So she stopped. She rinsed off the blade and but it back then turned towards them messy blood and puke filled toilet and smiled. Her work here was done. She flushed the toilet and then showered. The cuts stung in the shower but she kept telling herself she deserved it. When finished she put on a pair of pajamas and left the bathroom.

When she left the bathroom natsu and happy were sitting on her sofa. She shrieked. 'GET OUT OF MY ROOM!" she yelled. But natsu only smirked.

Happy replied with " ok! I wanted to go see Charle anyways." so Happy flew out her window. Lucy sighed and walked to her bed and layed down. Then Natsu said" you know it's like 95 outside and it only 3 in the afternoon. So why are you in long sleeved pajamas?"

Lucy started to panic. "I-uh I am at home at 3 in the afternoon because i-uh was exhausted today for some reason and I'm in long sleeved pajamas because they were the first pajamas I grabbed"

"Oh ok. But aren't you hot?"

"Natsu aren't you not supposed to feel like change in weather, especially when it comes to heat?

Besides, why do you care?"

"To answer your first question, no i don't feel heat at all, nor do I really feel cold temperatures either, and to answer your second question I'm your best friend right, i'm allowed to care, don't I?"

"I guess you're right, sorry i overreacted."

"So… are you gonna change?"

"NO YOU PERV!"

Natsu's face when red when he realized what she meant. "No no! I didn't mean it like that! I meant are you gonna change out of your pajamas because it's hot. And in the bathroom not in front of me. Unless… you want to…" he smirked.

"Again.. You're a perv. And no I'm not changing."

"Why not?"

"Because i'm too lazy" Or i don't want you to see the hideous mess I am and if you ever saw me like this you would be disgusted by the way I look.

"You… being lazy, or even you calling yourself lazy, that's the first." Natsu looks at her suspiciously "That doesn't sound like you. You're keeping something from me."

Lucy's heart started to pick up the pace and lucy's palms started getting sweaty. Natsu noticed this and said "You are! You are! I knew it! I so totally knew it! What is it?"

"No I'm not" Lucy lied but her voice betrayed her and broke. She was on the verge of tears but hid those away until later.

"Luucyyyyy… what are you hiding from meee?"

Natsu sat up from the couch and then started walking towards her. Her heart stopped then to only speed even faster than before. "Natsu! Stop! I'm not hiding anything so please stop!" This lie was a lot more believable but natsu didn't stop moving towards her.

Lucy stood up and crept towards the wall. Once she hit the wall. She had a panic attack. This time she couldn't hide the tears that followed. Natsu stopped at once. "Are-are you crying? Lucy i'm sorry i was just teasing. Please don't cry I'm sorry."

Natsu's P.O.V

As I playfully crept towards her she stood up from her bed and started walking backwards towards the wall. Her heart was racing. Then her back with the wall. I grinned. The trap has been placed. But then she slip down in a sitting position and I noticed the tears welling up in her eyes. What did I do? Is it something I said. How bad was this secret? Then she put her head between her knees and started to quietly sob. I froze. Lucy was having an anxiety attack in from of me and I didn't know what to do. "Are-are you crying? Lucy i'm sorry I was just teasing. Please don't cry i'm sorry." I started to walk towards her and then she screamed. "DON'T COME NEAR ME" okay now something was really up. I knew she would be mildly upset, but now enough to be having a panic attack, sobbing and screaming at me. So I didn't stop walking towards her. As i sat next to her so was still sobbing but much more loudly."lucy…" I said in the softest tone I could manage, which was pretty good. "You're really scaring me. Can you tell me what's going on."

"I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. I CAN'T" She became in a whimper but slowly became more pronounced.

"Why can't you tell me? You're really starting to scare me."

"Because if I do, you'll hate me, you'll be disgusted with me. I mean way more than you already are."

"LUCY!" She looked up, shocked at my volume and tone. I calmed myself and tried again. "Lucy. I can't hate you. You're too loveable. And why in the fucking hell would if be disgusted with you."

"Well if your not then you will be if I tell you"

"Stop it! Lucy can't you tell! I'm your best friend! You can trust me! I care so much about you. I don't hate you and I never fucking will. So stop making assumptions and tell what the hell is going on"

She looked like she was pondering my statement and I was too. Hot weather, long sleeves. I knew it had to be about her clothes. Maybe her arms. But what couldn't she show me on her arms. So I slowly said in a soft tone. "Lucy roll up your sleeves."

She froze. Like seriously froze. And then told me "no"

Bingo. I was right it had to be about her arms. But still what? So I tried again in a firmer tone. "I said roll up your sleeves."

Tears started flowing faster than ever. "I said no. please drop in natsu."

"I refuse to drop it"

Normal P.O.V

Then natsu grabbed her wrists. She screamed, kicked and cried but she was no match for natsu's strength. Natsu then rolled up her right arm quickly, but froze immediately. Lucy stopped fighting. The damage had been done. He knew and her life was over.