Disclaimer: I do not own Xena, Gabrielle, or any of the mentioned characters...though they would all kill me if they got the chance...
Random Reasons you would die by Xena's hands...Enjoy!^^
30 Ways to Die at Xena's Hands…
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1. Making mention that you think Joxxer is a better fighter…
2. Telling her she looks fat in that outfit…
3. Telling her you think Gabrielle looks fat in that outfit…
4. Playing 'keep-away' with her Chakram…
5. Insinuating there is a family resemblance between her and Argos…her horse…
6. Pulling the old 'Black Powder under the Toilet Seat' trick on her…
7. Kidnapping Gabrielle…
8. Making crucifix jokes…
9. Getting caught in her outfit…doubly if you're male…
10. Telling Joxxer she thinks he's a dreamboat…
11. Sending out fake invitations to a Wedding between her and Ares…
12. Hiding her horse and cooking a large hunk of meat, make insinuating comments…
13. Stealing Gabrielle's staff...
14. Mentioning you really think she would be better off being a Housewife than a Warrior…
15. Flirting with Gabrielle…
16. Stealing her armour…while she's in the shower, near an enemy camp…and running for it, you'll still die, but it will have been worth it.
17. Sending her a bag of nails and a hammer as a gag-gift…
18. Pointing out you don't think she's really Amazon Material…
19. Challenging her to a Duel.
20. Insinuating a not-quite-marital match between her mother and a goat…
21. Challenging Gabrielle to a Duel.
22. Mentioning you don't think Gabrielle is a natural blonde…
23. Mentioning you think Xena should be…
24. Asking Joxxer to prepare lunch…without telling Xena or Gabrielle…you might have to wait a while, but you'll surely die sometime between frantic trips to the bathroom…
25. Remembering that one time Xena and Gabrielle danced with Autolycus, and laughing…then being stupid enough to say it aloud…
26. Setting up a blind date between Gabrielle and Iolaus… without telling their respective partners in advance.
27. Asking whether or not they wear anything under their…outfits…
28. Pushing either Xena or Gabrielle into a River for the first ever, impromptu 'wet-armour contest'…
29. Loudly exclaiming either of them flashed you last time they were fighting, and that they should look into getting underwear…
30. Asking what cup-size they take in their chestplates…
You're last words? "It was worth it…"
Hope you liked it! Please feel free to submit your own ideas, and Review!^^