I Hope to God

By Elle-is-odd

My life before you was never much of a story to tell,

my soul, my heart, my body, nothing more then a mere empty shell.

I felt nothing, no pleasure nor remorse,

but in one instant, my life took on a different course.

I saw you there, underneath the park tree,

and at that very moment, I knew that you and I were meant to be.

You were so distant, apprehensive and cold,

it made me wonder just when my life began to unfold.

You sat down, your face twisted in a frown,

and I prayed to God that I could be the one to turn it around.

You were alone, sitting by your tree,

your gold hair ruffled in the wind, and I hoped to God, you'd look up at me.

I stayed silently seated on the old wooden bench,

praying to God that my heart wouldn't wrench.

My chest pounded and my head throbbed,

I knew from that very moment that my heart had been robbed.

But as the minutes passed by I still went unnoticed,

everything around me was completely out of focus.

Then I saw it. I saw you break down in tears,

I wanted to hug you, to hold you, to be the one to take away all of your fears.

My heart ached and it began to writhe,

and I hoped to God that he would take away all of your pain inside.

I felt my chest pull and my stomach grind,

it took all of my courage to make my way over to your side.

You didn't notice my presence as I knelt down,

and beyond your tears was your ever present frown.

I put my hand gently on your shoulder, hoping to God you'd be alright.

I wanted to do everything in my power to help heal all that was wrong inside.

You jumped at my touch, startled by my sudden appearance,

and as our eyes met, there was no interference.

The world suddenly went still, as bleary blue eyes met mine,

it felt as though angels were singing, and I swear to God, I could hear them chime.

Your face grew still and your tears came to a stop,

you stared up at me, speaking without a second thought.

You asked me who I was, and what I wanted,

I looked at you, paused, but never responded.

You gave me a strange look and suddenly...sadly I could already tell,

that there would never be a chance for us,

not now, not ever, not no way in hell.

I opened my mouth to speak, but nothing came out,

I cursed my own luck for ever giving me that doubt.

The skies were gray but I didn't give up hope,

a life without you seemed like something I could not cope.

I smiled at you as genuinely and sincere as can be,

and I hoped to God that you would smile back at me.

Your silence and stares deterred all my precious attempts,

but in my own little world, I was knelt down in a trance.

I let out another smile, a sadder one this time,

It was now that I realized, that you would never become mine.

I stood up silently with a dejected sigh, not once having said a word,

I began to walk away from you but that's when I heard.

I hoped to God that I heard it right,

I quickly turned around to find you once again, in my sight.

"Thank you." was what you said,

at this, my heart practically stopped, your words nearly knocking me dead.

You were touched by my kindness, and this was true,

there wasn't anything in the world I wouldn't do for you.

You smiled at me, passed your tear-stained cheeks,

my body became immobile, and here I stand amongst defeat.

I fell in love with your smile, hoping to God it was real.

It was a small, simple smile, but it was adorable, and I swear to god it felt so unreal.

If I said I wasn't glad or content, that wouldn't be true,

because the source of my happiness was certainly coming from you.

I approached you again and reached for your hand,

and at that very moment I was the happiest man.

I knew that at this point, you were all I wanted,

I was going to have you, and I now it was decided.

I didn't know why you were crying, but now, nor did it matter,

you had me, and I wont let you get any sadder.

I would move mountains, and capture the stars,

I would so anything, as long as I was in your heart.

As I reached out for you, again I hoped to God this was real,

I prayed to him that you wouldn't pull away,

and all that was left was a kiss to steal.

The sun peaked out from behind the darkened skies,

and all I could do was stare into your beautiful eyes.

I might have been mistaken when I thought I saw a halo around your head,

Would I ever give you up? No. I'd rather be dead.

I never expected for someone like me to find love,

but deep within my heart, I knew it was a sign from above.

It's amazing, it's glorious, astounding, it's true,

this wonderful feeling I get when I stand here with you.

Even though this is not about certainty or rightness,

for an empty shell like me, this was certainly a crisis.

I thanked God for giving me the strength,

for I found my love only at arms length.

I didn't give up hope, though I thought I should,

but now, here we are, and this is most certainly good.

Don't give up on your hopes or desires or the one you love,

you will become grateful, and want to thank the Lord from above.

I hope to God you get the strength and courage you need,

to never give up hope, for you to live, love,

to strive and succeed.

A/N:

Okay so, this was originally a poem/story I had written for a contest at school. The theme was 'hope' so I was inspired by Axel and Roxas of course. :) This is the first time I've used poetry to express something, so I was sort of stepping out of my comfort zone, but in the end I created this.

The contest was supposed to be about hope, and since it was for my Religion class, I had to throw God into the equation. He is mentioned quite a few times. God likes his Akuroku ;) must mean God is a women then. :)

So yeah, while everyone else wrote about famine and poverty, I whooped out this here love peom. Hope it was okay!! :D